Chapter twenty-five
Josephine
When we make it back home, I jump out of the car without waiting, but Aedon is lithe and catches up. When I get to the doors, Sam is already there waiting for our return.
“Welcome back,” he greets us.
I shoot him a death glare. Aedon gives him a brisk hello before jogging behind me to the elevator. I push the door closed button before he reaches me. The doors miraculously close on the sight of me giving him a vulgar gesture. I press the button to the penthouse, but the elevator doesn’t go anywhere.
The doors open again, and Aedon stands there with a key card between two fingers and a haughty smirk. I almost think he hasn’t given me one on purpose. He waves the card over the reader and presses the button. The elevator whirs in the dreadful silence and shoots upward. We reach our foyer and I stalk out, not even stopping while I attempt to tear the dress from my body. I’m stuck in the bodice, trying to reach behind me and yank the laces.
Aedon shoves my hands away and unclasps it, then the sound of the laces tearing fills the apartment before the bodice falls away. The Eye, which I had forgotten was shoved in between my breasts, rolls to the floor. It still looks stunned. Aedon bites his cheek, raising a brow, but stays unnervingly silent. I’m angry, proud, and irrational, which is a horrible combination.
My eyes lock onto the bar. I grab the first bottle I find, pouring myself a glass all the way to the brim. Then I sink into the couch.
He sits in the armchair across from me. “Are you ready to talk now?”
I raise a finger, gulp down the drink, and hold it out to him for another. He huffs, takes it, and refills it.
“You may speak now.” I give him permission.
“Tell me what happened.” He seems calm, cool, and collected. It’s boiling my blood.
“You tell me what happened first.”
Aedon does something unprecedented. He leaves. He goes to the bedroom and shuts the door behind him, not a slam, but a shut. In a fit of misplaced rage, I go after him, tossing open the door and storming in. With his back to me, his body turns to stone.
I shove him. “What the fuck is wrong with you?”
Aedon whirls around and there is chaos flashing in his eyes. In moments he is on me, slamming me into the wall. I try to fight him, but the effort is futile. I scratch, bite, and kick until I’m too tired to continue.
“He’s the boy, isn’t he? The one you loved?” One hand wraps around my neck gently, and my breath hitches in my throat. The other unzips the pants of his tux. I feel him at my entrance, and he plunges into me without warning. My lungs give out as I struggle to adjust to his size.
“This hardly seems like the time.” My voice rides on a moan.
“When do you suggest, Josephine?” He’s frustrated and seated inside of me, looking at me with malice. “Every time we speak it’s like talking in circles. One step forward and three steps back. I’ve been on my best behavior, trying to be patient when you need it, and doing my best to let you come to me like Vivian said, but I am not a patient man.”
“Vivian said that?” It’s difficult to focus on his words. I’m so fucking full. “You asked her for advice?”
“Stop changing the goddamn subject." His jaw twitches.
He’s losing his nerve. His fingers tighten around my neck, and I mew, grinding against him. Aedon pins me, pushing deeper inside. My hips are so tight against the wall that I can’t move. My clit is burning, and my brain is like a dumpster fire.
“Aedon,” I whine with a frustrated laugh—as much of one as I can give with my airway cut off.
“Do you regret it?” His hot breath fans my ear. I’m so dizzy that it takes me a few moments to catch up to his uncharacteristically desperate question.
“Regret what?” I ask through my teeth.
“Being with me. Now that you know he lives.” His hand squeezes tighter. I try to stay calm, breathing through my nose while a river rushes between my legs. “Do you still feel love for him?”
“I’m feeling everything right now,” I groan. He releases my neck, but keeps my hips pinned against the wall, stroking his fingers down my collarbone.
“You know that’s not what I’m talking about.”
I do know what he’s talking about. Killian’s return. It’s jarring, but it doesn’t change anything when it comes to Aedon. I’m his wife. I won’t take that back just because some lying boy said he loved me one fucking time. He thinks my newfound need for revenge is an interest in revitalizing something that never existed in the first place.
“Don’t fuck with me, Josephine. I know you saw him after I ordered him away,” he sneers. Aedon has fully lost his temper, and I could orgasm with the knowledge that he's so jealous he could kill me.
“You’re jealous of him?” I give another frantic laugh. He glares at me with daggers.
“I’m asking you, love. Should I be?” He’s insecure, another unprecedented thing.
“And you would let me go?”
I shouldn’t have said that. I don’t like this conversation. I’m terrified I might lose Aedon. I knew he would be angry, but I want my obsessive psycho husband back. The one who drives his name into my skin almost as deep as he drives into me.
He searches my face. “Is that what you want?”
“It’s not in my silence,” I manage to say.
“What?”
“My silence. That’s not when I’m the loudest. It’s when I’m screaming your name,” I end with a whisper.
The vein in his temple throbs. “You’re drunk. Do you even know what you’re saying?”
“I love you, Aedon.”
Up to this point I have kept the words from my mouth. So has Aedon. The implication has been there, but now he needs to hear it, so I’ll tell him how I feel. Hades asked me hard questions tonight. If Aedon is questioning how I feel, I need to tell him. Even if it feels like I could throw up expressing emotion. He’s done more than earned it.
“Do you mean it?”
“I don’t say things that I don’t mean. I dance around them.”
I adjust my ankles hooked around his waist and squeeze. I need some sort of fucking friction before I come based solely on the fact that he's inside of me. But Aedon is an angry statue with the hottest possessive smirk, and he’s my fucking husband. It’s all too much.
“Are you going to come?” he asks, looking into my face. I can feel myself tightening. No, no, no. Not again. I give him a helpless nod.
He nips at my neck. I’m barreling toward an orgasm, and he didn’t even have to do a goddamn thing. “Come, love, and I promise it won’t be the last time.”
My nails dig into his neck, drawing blood. He’s crushing my hips, and my insides weep. This might be worse than when he wouldn’t touch me at all. He keeps kissing my neck, and goosebumps spread across my skin.
“Aedon, please,” I beg. He chuckles over my collarbone, and I whine. One last little protest before I come. He gives me nothing, not one movement, letting me suffer through it like he suffered through the night. My insides are like molten lava, already begging to come again.
His soul is latched to mine. While he has been loud about his obsession, I’ve been quiet, but I won’t be anymore. I don’t have to be. All my feelings are out there. I laid my love down as a sacrifice. Eternity with Aedon will be bliss if we make it that far. We’re flying close to the sun, and the fall will be worth it if I can melt with him.
For years Killian tried to keep me from myself, unable to accept me. He always redirected me or stood in front of me. Aedon watches, absorbed in who I am. He watched me bash that man’s face in at the club that night and thought it was endearing. I don’t know who I am, but Aedon doesn’t give a fuck. He would love me even if I became a monster and turn himself into one to be with me. I stop spasming around him, but I’m shaking.
I need more. I need his words, his love, and his life. I need everything.
“Do you love me?” I ask. It makes me feel weak and vulnerable to ask.
“What?” He looks up at me, brows furrowed with confusion. I wrap my arms around his neck, trying to ignore my own arousal.
“Do. You. Love. Me?” I pronounce each word.
His kiss is soft. He runs his fingertips along my body, taking care to explore each inch. He withdraws himself and slides back into me, sending a shock wave through me. Aedon pulls me from the wall and lays me down. Kissing me again and again until my lips are numb. With each kiss he pushes in to the hilt.
His voice is raspy. “I love you, Josie. So fucking much.”
This isn’t just sex anymore. Blue eyes watch me hungrily. He stands, unbuttoning his shirt excruciatingly slowly, before reaching down and finally removing his pants. His massive cock is throbbing, coated with my cum. He lines himself up, and I whimper before he flips me onto my knees on the bed and drags my hips back toward him. I feel him again, extending between my soaking thighs as I tremble with need. Instead of entering me, he slides between my folds and pulls my shoulder backward, pressing my back against his chest.
“You’re a disease,” he says, echoing the words he said earlier. He circles my nipple with his fingertip. “You are infecting me, and I won’t survive. I know I won’t. If you were a poison, I would drink it willingly. I will sell you my soul, Jos, if it means that you know how much I love you.”
He pinches my nipple, then trails his hand down my stomach over my hips. His fingers slip through my folds gently, carefully. He poises one over my clit and then touches it, circling tenderly.
“I love your violence. I love your favor. I love it when you shred my soul apart and piece it back together at your will. I love you, Jos, more than anyone has ever loved before.” His hand slithers back up and fondles my neck. “We are inevitable.” He nuzzles my cheek. “Will that suffice?”
It’s the most insane thing anyone has ever said in the history of the Universe. He’s being honest, raw, and vulnerable. I nod my head yes.
“I want the truth tomorrow. All of it. Do you understand?”
“Yes, Aedon,” I manage to gasp.
He fondles my breasts again, rolling my nipple between his thumb and forefinger. They harden at his touch. He takes a finger and swipes it where I'm soaking wet, bringing it to his mouth and cleaning it off. He brushes my hair to one side gently, then kisses my neck with the patience of a saint. When his teeth graze my skin, a moan escapes my lips, and he flips me over, laying my back onto the bed and climbing over me.
He takes his time pushing into me. Every nerve ending in my body explodes. I’m existing in a place that doesn’t exist. I whimper, and he lets out a strained breath. When I think he’s all the way in he readjusts, pressing his palm against the small of my back, and he pushes in further. The oxygen in my lungs evaporates, and I can’t see straight.
“Look at me, Jos.” Aedon’s voice is hardly above a whisper.
I manage to open my eyes, and it takes me several deep breaths to focus. He looks wild. Clouded blue eyes stare back at me with intention, and every muscle in his body is tense. The way he says my name sends heat straight to my core.
“Yes, Aedon?” It comes out loud, like I’m yelling in a library.
“I love you.”
“Show me.” It’s as much as I can say, but he accepts it easily and without doubt.
His forehead glistens with sweat. He places his hand on my abdomen, pushing down. I already felt him, but there is so much pressure I whine. My body craves release. I buck my hips, which causes him to pull out and slam back into me.
“Shit,” he groans and leans over me.
Aedon reaches up and grabs the headboard. His thrusts are slow enough to torture me, and hard enough to make me come. Heat is already building inside of me, and I dig my fingernails into his sides, clawing at him to be closer.
“If you k-keep…” I can’t even finish my sentence.
“You’re going to come.” He smirks with an excruciating amount of effort.
My fingernails dig deeper, and he growls. Not only can I feel him inside of me, but I can feel his emotions. Aedon’s thoughts, fears, and perspective pours into me, and it's overwhelming. It’s dangerous and addictive.
“Come for me, Jos,” he demands.
“Wi-with me, Aedon. Pl-please,” I beg. I’m squirming and shaking trying to stave off my orgasm.
“Whatever you want, love. I will give it to you.” His voice is tantalizing. After a few more strokes I feel him stiffen inside of me.
“Come, Josie,” he commands, sharing my breath. I bite his bottom lip until it bleeds, tasting the sweet iron in my own mouth. He doesn’t pull away or rebuke me, just melds his mouth to mine. I release all of the pent-up energy from the night.
“I love you, Aedon,” I whisper. I orgasm, loudly and unashamed. The pressure inside of me combusts as he groans. His slippery heat empties into me. He pumps a few more times and comes again.
For a few minutes we’re a heap of sweaty limbs, dragging in air trying to figure out if we’re still alive. He pulls out of me slowly, carefully.
“Fuck.” He rolls over and falls over the side onto the floor, dragging me with him onto his chest. His hand swipes across his mouth where I bit him, coming away with a red smear. Aedon doesn’t even acknowledge it.
“Did you come twice?”
“So much.” He grins. Ninety percent of his agitation must have been sexual frustration.
I lay my head on his chest and trail the hidden symbols that lie under his tattoos with my fingertip. His hand absentmindedly strokes my hair. We’re impossibly close, but I want him closer. We are the shredded remnants of one soul.
“How many would that be for you, tonight? Three?” He counts on his fingers.
“Two of those were pure torture,” I remind him.
“I guess we should even the playing field then.”
I swallow with anticipation and a little bit of fear. Four orgasms is going to tear me in half.
He licks his lips. “You made me bleed, little devil.” His teeth are orange with blood. I see the darkness there, and I shiver. I feel the rage he suppresses inside. There are dark promises dripping from his words like honey.
He flips me off him and smashes me to the ground with his hand around my throat and fingers fisted in my hair. We’re connected in some ethereal place and existing in another dimension.
I’m faintly aware that the floor is trembling, shaking. The light fixture is clanking, and things are falling off of the walls. My scars feel like they are melting off of my skin, pulsing with a life of their own. I open my eyes wide, in a strange mixture of pain and pleasure, only to see a void. The room is gone. Fear creeps into the recesses of my mind. I’m blind. The darkness is consuming me. Drowning me.
I’m in my recurring nightmare. I’m clawing back to the surface of the Lethe begging for the red headed boy to save me. It’s dragging me under.
Down, down, down.
The water roars in my ears and fills my lungs. Blood, so much blood. My fingers sink into the bank, and I drag myself up until I feel the open air on my face.
I open my eyes and see the same woman I’ve seen for years. She’s tugging on tiny braids that have been woven throughout her hair. Her shoulders are hunched over, eyes flicking around the barren clearing. I can feel the presence of something in the surrounding forest. Shadows that flit from trunk to trunk.
I think I should feel afraid. There’s anguish in the atmosphere, but I feel excited instead. A man emerges from a cave, and towers over the anxious woman. In the moonlight, he’s beautiful. Glorious. He’s Aedon.
He looks around with a calculated gaze. Those blue eyes are black voids, and it makes my heart flutter. They land on me long enough for me to feel exposed, before returning to the woman.
“Who the fuck are you?” he says in that velvet voice that ruins me.
“I’m an old friend.” The nerves are apparent in her voice.
Aedon furrows his brows. “I don’t remember. It’s all dark.”
“Sometimes we forget things when they are painful.”
“Have I gone mad?” A menacing smile crosses his face.
Yes. We both have.
The woman straightens her shoulders, gaining confidence. “We all do when we feel grief.”
“What do I grieve?” It’s sad. Confused. Exactly how I felt when a redheaded boy pulled me from the Lethe.
“Everything.”
"Who took it?"
"Me." She says it as if it's so simple.
She's familiar and foreign all at once. Who is she? I scrape my brain trying to recall her in my vacant memory. I feel a tug on my ankle. The red sand slides through my fingers as I try to claw my way back onto the shore. I’m going under, back into the water.
“Aedon!” I want to scream. “I’m here! I’m right here!”
But my screams are silent as my lungs are filling with blood.
Is it the future? Is it the past? I fight the current, begging the Universe to take me back to him.
There’s a voice in my head, saying my name over and over again with desperation. “Josephine. Josie. Jo.”
My body convulses, begging for reprieve while I reach for the surface, my fingers twitching. It becomes murky and confusing. All I can count on is that I’m supposed to wake up. An iridescent shimmer wraps around me, cocooning me. My skin burns, but it hardly matters. Maybe this is finally real, and I’m being given a merciful death, despite all the vicious ones that were carried out by my hands.
I won’t let this be the end. I won’t go quietly.
The woman said he lost everything. So did I. I won’t lose it all again.