Chapter Eighteen #3
My father’s confession shifted my entire perspective.
If I had taken that potion in the gardens, Casey wouldn’t be here.
My father was a great chief, a powerful man, and the best dad in the entire world.
He always had been. I would’ve never guessed he had any mental health issues if he hadn’t told me.
If he could work through his trauma and get to the other side of it… so could I.
“You think there’s hope for me?” I asked.
“Of course I do. You’re a strong warrior, but you can’t fight all your battles alone.
When I was going through the worst time in my life, I had my friends to lift me up and carry me when I could no longer carry myself.
Your mother was the one who got me through it all.
And Charlie’s the man who’s always been the one to carry you. ”
His words were deeply true. I’d survived the Institute, my spinal injury, torture, and the worst the Warden could throw at me because Charlie had gotten me through it. I’d helped him survive, too. We’d gotten each other through a lot, and that was hard to forget.
“You and Charlie are fighting against each other, and that’s not a marriage. When you’re married, two people have to fight against the world as a unit. It’s you and him against everything,” Daddy said firmly. “You aren’t each other’s enemies, but companions.”
“I don’t know why you’re advocating for him. He took my magic away and cut off my bond with my Familiar. He made me lose my soul. You should want to kill him.”
“I know a lot about what it’s like to live without a soul,” Daddy said. “Does the father in me want to brutally murder him in the worst way I can think of for hurting you like this? Absolutely.”
Daddy moved closer. “But the father in me can also admit when his daughter has made mistakes, and you did mess up, Ava. We both know how you get when you’re out of control, and you were that day.
You didn’t pause to think hard enough about what you were doing.
Charlie cast the spell, but what happened was a consequence of both of your actions.
He hurt you in the worst way an Elementai can be hurt, and I can’t stand knowing that.
But if he hadn’t, you would’ve killed everything else I love, too.
I can love you more than anything while admitting to myself that what you chose wasn’t right. ”
“You must feel like you messed up as a dad, raising me to be this way.”
“I know there’s only so much I can do. I helped you as best I could while you were growing up, but there’s a ruthless streak in you I knew I couldn’t erase.
Part of me never wants that wildness to fade.
But you need to learn how to rein it in, and not let it consume you, because you can’t keep letting it get out of hand. It’s not just harming you anymore.”
He was right. I’d let my pride get the better of me.
“I’m not sure how to feel about Casey yet, or what decisions I should make for him.
” I gripped my grandfather’s bow tighter.
“But maybe Charlie and I can do this together. Though I don’t know how we can.
I’m pretty sure he’s just as lost as I am. ”
“Charlie needs a dad to guide him, too. He’s never had one, and it’s led to him being the way he is now.
He’s had to raise himself, and with that kind of upbringing, it’s a miracle he’s managed to stay as good as he has.
You’ll always come first— you’re my priority, no matter what.
But Charlie’s a dad who doesn’t know how to be one, and Cameron is a pitiful excuse for a father.
If nobody’s going to step up and guide Charlie, I have to.
Whatever you choose, it’s not fair for him to do this alone. ”
Daddy’s voice turned gruff. “I have to thank him for saving my daughter’s life. You wouldn’t have lived if Charlie hadn’t given his eyes to you— yes, your mother told me about that. And he wouldn’t be here if you hadn’t died for him. You complete each other.”
His acknowledgement of the deep affection Charlie and I once shared comforted me immensely. At least I hadn't been the only one. Other people had seen what I’d once seen. My marriage hadn’t been a fantasy, but something real.
I managed to shakingly say the thing that had been on my mind for months, but I’d been too afraid to speak aloud to anyone else until now. I nocked another arrow, aiming it at the target. “I don’t want a divorce. But I don’t see any other way.”
“Then become the warrior that’ll fight for him,” Daddy encouraged. “And he’ll fight for you, too. One of you has to start the journey. It’s up to you to lead the way.”
Daddy always gave the best advice. My lips trembled as I opened my mouth to thank him, the feeling of overwhelm lifting from my shoulders as incredible relief flooded down upon me.
There was light at the end of the tunnel. We just had to get there.
My gratitude toward my father was cut short as the door to the training arena burst open. Charlie’s voice bellowed across the arena, echoing off the walls as he cried, “You’re not giving away my kid!”