Chapter 43
Chapter Forty-Three
Joy stood silently in the mirror, eyeing herself as she worked to clasp her necklace around her throat. Ace appeared in the doorway of the bathroom, already fully dressed for family dinner.
“Let me help you with that,” he said as he slid behind her. Joy dropped her hands, letting him take hold of the clasp.
“You aight?” he asked once finished, situating the rose pendant to fall perfectly in the valley of her breasts.
Joy nodded, avoiding his eyes as she picked up an earring from the jewelry dish on the counter.
“I’m fine,” she said. She felt Ace’s arms wrap around her and his heavy stare pin her in place through the mirror. He placed a kiss on her bare shoulder before speaking directly into her ear.
“What did he want?”
Joy sighed under the weight of the elephant they’d been tip toeing around for two days.
Ace had watched her retreat into herself but he didn't push her for answers.
Joy didn't speak, instead picking up her rings from the dish in front of her. He gently took the rings from her, then spun her to face him.
“What did he say to you, Rose?” he asked again, searching her eyes.
Joy blinked up at him. “He wants me to come home…” she trailed off, her eyes wandering to the bathtub before rolling back to Ace’s awaiting eyes.
She saw his adam’s apple bob in his throat with a thick swallow before he replied.
“And what was your answer?”
“I didn’t give one.”
Ace nodded slowly.
“This is what I wanted,” she said.
Ace nodded again. “I know.”
“But I also want this,” she whispered, her eyes pleading for him to understand.
“I know, baby.”
“I don’t know when it happened, but at some point I lost focus of my goal and why I'm here. I want to be here… but I need to be there.”
“When are you gonna live for you though, Rose?” Ace asked, moving a strand of hair out of her face.
Joy shook her head. “You and I both know that’s not how this works.”
“This shit can go however you want. I’m not gon’ tell you what to do, but I’ve heard you talk about what they did to you. Woken up in the middle of the night to you having nightmares about what they put you through. Why would you want to go back to that?”
“Because it’s mine. I built it and earned it. Why would I just give it up? Especially now when they need me.”
“That man exiled you and told you to your face that he’d let your enemies kill you. And now you wanna run back because they need you? You deserve more than that Rose. I can give you more than that.”
Joy blinked rapidly to ward off the tears that threatened to spill. The truth of his words settled into her soul but her mind, filled to the brim with a lifetime of her father’s teachings, rejected it.
Joy pulled back from Ace, taking her rings from his hand and slipping them on.
“Come on. We should head out before we’re late.”
With one last fluff of her hair, she left Ace standing there.
Joy cackled at the senseless argument between Von and Ace as she sipped on her fresh glass of bourbon.
The earlier heaviness of she and Ace’s conversation had melted away, replaced instead with the levity of being surrounded by people that felt like home.
Her entire body froze as the thought passed her mind. She glanced around the table at the people who’d welcomed her without asking for anything of her but to be herself.
It dawned on her that the reason she’d lost focus is because she’d found them.
Found him.
As if he knew she was thinking of him, Ace’s hand found hers under the table.
Joy looked up at him, finding his eyes already on her with a soft smile on his lips. He didn't have to say a word for Joy to know what he was saying.
This is more.
Dinner and dessert passed in a blur of laughter and stolen touches before the staff cleared the table and everyone migrated to the sitting room.
“Hate to put an end to this great night but we have some business to discuss,” Ace said during a lull in conversation.
“I understand,” Ella said, waving him off. “Y’all are dismissed.”
The siblings rose one after the other, the earlier smiles flattening.
Joy stood from where she’d been perched on Ace’s lap to allow him up, then claimed his seat when he made his way to the hallway that would lead him to Zachariah’s office.
Joy watched as Ace reached his hand behind him, beckoning for her.
Only when his hand remained empty did he realize she wasn’t standing beside him.
He turned with questioning eyes.
“You not coming, Jane?” Von asked, all of them stopping and turning to face her.
“No,” Joy shook her head. “I don’t want to impose.”
Ace’s brow furrowed and he opened his mouth to speak before he could, April did.
“Girl, come on! You’re practically family,” she said.
Hums of agreement sounded from the siblings and even the elders. The sentiment should have been reassuring but all it did was fill Joy with a sense of dread.
“Come on, Rose,” Ace called to her with his voice and hands which never dropped.
Silently, Joy stood and made her way over. Ace took her hand in his as soon as she was within reach.
In the office, Ace took the seat behind the desk, pulling Joy down onto his lap.
He leaned forward to place a lingering kiss on her shoulder. “You okay?” he asked, his words low and just for her, masked by the bustle of everyone getting situated.
Joy nodded and gave what she hoped was a reassuring smile, then took his face between both of her hands and planted a kiss on his lips.
Ace’s hand trailed up her back to cup the nape of her neck and deepened the kiss.
“Ewwww,” Von heckled, causing them to pull apart and glare at the interruption in unison.
“Grow up,” Ace grumbled, being met with a laugh from Von.
As if flipping a switch, Ace straightened his posture and dropped his smile. Just the change in his demeanor shifted the energy of the room and without a word, business commenced.
“Pops gave his blessing for Isaac. I’ve called a meeting with the Council next week for official approval.”
They all nodded in understanding, premature grief warring with lingering rage at the thought of what they were about to do.
“I don’t want any time wasted. As soon as we get the green light, I want his head.”
Joy rubbed Ace’s knuckles, practically feeling the rage radiating off of him.
Ace began giving his orders.
August would check card activity.
Remy would check cameras.
Von would interrogate what was left of his associates.
April would ask around with their friends.
And Ace and Jrue would prepare their presentation to the Council.
Joy watched Ace shift seamlessly into Boss mode. Watched as he led with absolute authority and his team followed without question. She remembered what that felt like.
To command.
To build.
To belong.
Joy looked around the room at the people she’d come to need. The people who'd accepted and welcomed her without asking anything of her in return.
She realized as much as she wanted to choose this — choose him — that would mean that everything she’d built, everything she’d sacrificed, and everything she survived would be for nothing.
Staying would mean walking away from not just Byron and the Cartel, not even just power, but from herself. Because who would she be without it?
Ace’s woman?
One of the Kings?
And if she disappointed them like she disappointed her father, what would she have left then?
Joy was painfully withdrawn for the rest of the evening, her mind doing its best to detach from the physical so she could do what needed to be done.
By the time they made it home that night, Joy’s mind had been made up.
She ran back and forth with it until her brain and soul were both tired but she knew what decision she’d made when she walked into the closet and she’d begun to share with Ace and began clearing all of her belongings off of the hangers.
She detached herself, steeling herself to do what she didn't want to do but needed to be done.
Leave, she coached herself. Go now or you’ll never do it. You’ll stay here forever, blissfully content and woefully ordinary.
Nothing but the King’s girl, her father’s voice chimed in but it sounded like a mix of her own and his, blended into one to taunt her.
Ace stood in the doorway of his bathroom watching Joy apply her nighttime serums and creams to her face.
He hadn’t been more than 10 feet away from her but the space between them the past few days had felt like a chasm.
They hadn’t spoken further about the visit from her father but it didn’t take a genius to figure out what was happening in that head of hers.
The space she put between them was confirmation enough.
The same look he’d seen on her face the night they met — sad, angry, and confused — he saw on her again.
He’d stayed quiet about it, giving her space to sort out her feelings on her own. To make a decision on her own. But he felt her pulling away from him.
She barely acknowledged him as she moved from the bathroom to the closet that had once only had his belongings but was slowly filling with hers too.
Ace didn’t want to see his closet, his home, or his life devoid of Joy’s presence.
Not now that he’d gotten used to the warmth she'd brought to the chill he was used to.
Ace’s heart clenched in his chest when he saw her begin pulling items off of the hangers and stuffing them unceremoniously into the duffle bag she’d emptied and discarded several times over.
He huffed out a laugh of disbelief.
“That nigga got to you huh?”
Ace’s voice was ominously quiet behind Joy as she continued packing.
“I-… They need me,” Joy whispered.
“Now they need you huh? A month ago they didn’t care whether you were alive or dead but now they need you and you go running?”
Joy stiffened. “That was mean.”
“It’s the truth.,” he retorted. When she didn’t turn around, he spoke again. “Why are you doing this?”
Joy continued throwing the items she’d brought over into the bag she’d emptied not even two weeks ago. “This is what I am… who I am. I don’t know how to be anything else.”