Chapter 44
Chapter Forty-Four
Joy watched the Houston skyline whiz past her from the backseat of the Mercedes Darnell had picked her up in from the airport.
A wave of déjà vu washed over her that nearly made her nauseous. The familiarity of the buildings and streets didn’t bring her comfort the way she thought and pulling up to the Thibodeaux Trucking building didn’t fill her with the warmth of home that she’d longed for since the moment she left.
A vibration in her lap made her look down to see yet another call from Mel.
Joy hadn’t had the heart to say goodbye, so she didn’t.
Like Ace, she left Mel in the middle of the night.
Her gut was sour with guilt and grief, but she hadn’t looked back.
Not when she texted her father, not when she booked her flight home, and not when she stepped onto Texas soil for the first time in a year.
Darnell opened the door for her and Joy stepped out into the humid air. He kept a healthy distance, a hand on his waist as Joy trudged to the door.
Soldiers paused their work as she passed, observing the prodigal daughter's return. Not for the first time, Joy wondered what they thought of her. What story they’d been told.
It didn’t take much to see that whatever they’d heard wasn’t flattering. The welcoming glances and nods of respect she was used to had morphed into downcast eyes shielding either fear or disgust. They peered at her like an outsider. Like an attack dog who’d harmed its owners.
Joy had forgotten what it’d felt like to be looked at that way.
She walked through the Thibodeaux Trucking building, her steps sure though her heart wasn’t.
Her phone buzzed in her hand again. She looked down expecting to silence another call from Mel but saw April’s name flash across the screen instead. Her heart clenched but she silenced the call.
They’d be okay. They’d forget about her soon enough and their lives would be better for it, she was sure.
Or at least that's what she told herself to see it through. She could do this if she was the only one who suffered.
She clutched her tote bag in one hand and the other fidgeted with the hem of her blouse.
She wished she had Ace’s lighter. The blunt in her purse was calling and though she had to wait, the rhythmic sound of the lighter flicking open and closed would soothe her.
It wasn’t until that moment did she consider if that’s why he did it.
Stop thinking about Ace, she told herself.
She forced herself to put him out of her mind, and reminded herself to bury the version of her she’d become in New York. The version that Ace had pulled out of her and embraced.
That girl wasn’t welcomed here.
That girl was a liability.
She shook off the thoughts of him and everything she’d become.
She donned the impenetrable armor that once fit her perfectly but now felt a bit heavier. With her shoulders back and a strut that betrayed her shaky nerves, she entered the back hallway that led to her father’s office.
This was what she wanted, she reminded herself. That reminder is what spurred her on, despite the uneasy feeling that settled in her stomach as she knocked on the office door.
It swung open immediately and Byron stood there. “Welcome back, princess,” he smiled.
Joy blinked, waiting for the sense of calm and accomplishment she thought would come with those words, but they never came. She’d dreamed of hearing those words from him but now that she had. they didn’t hit the same. Still, she forced a smile and entered the office.
The moment her pumps crossed over the threshold, she wished she hadn’t.
Sitting on the other side of the desk, looking like privilege and evil incarnate, was her ex fiancé.
Jermaine turned around in his chair and a salacious grin spread across his face.
“Hello Joy.”
Joy sneered at him. “What the fuck is he doing here?” she asked. She took a step back and turned to her father.
He placed a hand on her shoulder to keep her from backing out of the room and nudged her towards the desk. “Have a seat princess. I’ll explain everything in a moment.”
“No, you’ll explain now.”
His soft face sharpened into hard features that let Joy know she was dancing on the line of his patience.
“Watch your mouth. Mind your manners, and have a seat,” he ordered through gritted teeth.
Joy’s first instinct was to snap back with a challenge.
Instead, she obeyed.
With a deep breath, Joy moved to do as she was told but Jermaine’s hand lifting stopped them both in their tracks.
“Frisk her for weapons before she comes near me,” he ordered his security standing beside him. “You know my girl has a lethal temper,” he winked, flexing the shoulder that had a Swarovski crystal covered pump buried in it the last time Joy was alone with him.
The burly security guard stepped forward to follow the command and Joy turned her glare on him. “If you touch me, you’ll be pulling back a nub.”
“Yes, you do seem fond of that method aren’t you?” Jermaine antagonized her.
“Joy. Hand over your weapons so we can get this over with,” Byron ordered.
Joy’s head felt like she was spinning and her steps felt unsteady.
What the fuck was going on?
Jermaine and his father had served as legal counsel but they’d never been allowed into Cartel business. Anything the Chapmans needed to know after their alliance was complete would come through Joy, where spousal privilege would prevent testimony.
Jermaine being there wasn’t right and something told her she wouldn’t like what she heard once she sat down.
She removed the knife tucked in her bra and tossed it on the desk in front of Jermaine. She unstrapped her gun from her thigh and scoffed when the guard held his hand out for it.
“I’d rather die,” she spat. Instead, she opened up her bag and dropped it inside her purse. She zipped the tote back up, creating the only barrier between herself and her weapon that she’d be allowing.
“Happy?” she asked.
Jermaine’s slimy grin made her uneasy. “I’m about to be. Let’s get started Thibodeaux.”
Joy sat down in the seat next to Jermaine and crossed her legs at the knee. She could practically feel his eyes on the bit of exposed thigh that appeared after her skirt rode up. It made her skin feel too tight and she wanted to claw his eyes out of their sockets just to get them off of her.
Byron cleared his throat. “Joy, you know I told you that the organization has come into some legal trouble,” he said.
Joy nodded. “Yes. So what, you want me to work with him?” she asked, jabbing a thumb beside her.
Byron shifted uncomfortably in his seat. “Uh… something like that. Jermaine’s father just passed,” he paused and Joy wondered for a moment if he knew it was her but soon realized the gap was for manners.
“Condolences,” Joy said dryly.
“Thank you, my love,” Jermaine said, putting a hand on her thigh. She gripped it and bent it back at the wrist. His cry of pain made his guards step forward but he waved them off then cradled his injured hand.
“Do. Not. Touch. Me,” she gritted. “Daddy you have two minutes to tell me what the fuck is going on here before I get up and walk out.”
Byron huffed an exasperated breath like the two of them were annoying him.
“Jermaine is taking over for his father and wants to take a more… active role. He has agreed to be our legal counsel and use his connections to make this go away… Under the condition that you agree to marry him and he fills the role of Cleve’s absence. ”
Joy stiffened.
Surely she was hearing wrong.
Surely her father wasn’t asking her to continue on with marrying the man who’d almost killed her.
The man who ruined her life.
Surely not.
“Have you all lost your minds? I won’t marry him.”
“I’m afraid you don’t have a choice,” Byron said.
Joy raised a brow. “Excuse me?”
“Cleve’s death left Byron holding the bag. Marry me or daddy dear goes to prison and your empire is dismantled,” Jermaine clarified.
Joy chuckled. “This is insane.”
“When the feds come knocking, your father goes down, probably you too. Then I won’t need you and I can just take over the Thibodeaux empire. You know what, now that I think about it, I like that plan better.”
“Jermaine,” Byron said with a warning in his tone.
Jermaine turned his hard eyes on him. “Get her in line Byron or that’s exactly what I’ll do. Nothing.”
“Get me in line?” Joy balked, standing to her feet once again. “How ‘bout I line my foot up with yo?—
“Enough!” Byron banged a fist on the desk causing both Joy and Jermaine to freeze. He massaged the bridge of his thumb and for the first time, Joy noticed how weary he looked. “Joy… You agreed to come home and help.”
“I thought you needed legal help and you knew that. You know damn well I wouldn’t have come back if I knew this is what you wanted from me. After everything he’s done to me how can you even ask this of me?”
“A queen must sacrifice for the?—”
“And is that what I’ll be? The queen? Or just a bargaining chip for you two to play with and cut me out? Again.”
Jermaine stood. His height was comparable to Ace’s but Joy thought he looked smaller. Felt smaller. Whereas Ace’s power was loud and his presence spoke before he did, Jermaine was the kind of man that needed to assert his power at every step or it’d be forgotten.
“You think you deserve to be a queen after what you did?”
Joy didn’t need him to specify. She could see him running down the list in his head.
Six months ago, that would have been enough to shut her up. She’d have fallen in line, eager to prove herself. Prove her worth.
Today though, the indictment didn’t land the same. She knew she deserved it. She’d worked for it. Bled for it.
Ace had seen the queen in her. Had been willing to give her the throne, not in spite of everything she was but because of it.
You left, she reminded herself. What Ace did or didn’t see no longer mattered. She’d left him and the family that’d welcomed and loved her beyond her own comprehension in favor of fulfilling her duty to her family and taking back the rightful place.
She’d be a fool to think it’d come without sacrifices.
Joy shook her head. The two sides of her warred for control. The old Joy who desperately wanted to be welcomed home. The one who would do anything her father — her general — required of her.
The new Joy, the one she’d spent a year trying to kill. The one who felt strong and beautiful, despite the darkness she now harbored.
“I deserve that and more. You deserved what you got too. Plus some,” she said definitively.
Byron stood as well. “Why don’t we sleep on it for a few days, have some discussions and reconvene to iron out the details later,” he proposed.
Jermaine smirked. “Yeah,” he said, waving his security along as he headed to the door. His eyes never left Joy’s. “Sleep on it.”
Joy spoke up as soon as she and Byron were alone.
“He’s not doing this because he loves me or even for power. He’s doing this because he wants to punish me. Marrying him wouldn’t be a partnership,” she spat. “You’d make me his prisoner.”
Joy didn’t know why she was surprised by her father’s willingness to offer her up.
Since she could remember, he’d inflicted and allowed unimaginable pain.
He’d done it under the guise of preparing her to take over the organization.
To survive in a world that would automatically put her at a disadvantage.
“This will build your tolerance, princess” he’d said. “You’ll never overpower your enemies so you’ll need to be smarter. Stronger. Not physically but mentally. You need to be able to withstand pain that they would cower from.”
Joy had accepted it as a necessary part of her training.
She now saw it for the abuse that it was.
Byron sighed, placing a hand on her shoulder as he passed. “Sleep on it.” He opened the door wider.
Joy scoffed to herself. They both knew that she didn’t have a choice though. Not if she wanted to remain there.
Joy took the silent command and made to leave.
“I know you’ll make the right choice, princess,” he said at her back.
“Bitch you better stay down there because the way I’m feeling, the next time I see you, I’mma wring your fucking neck!”
Joy never thought she’d find comfort in being berated and threatened but as she listened to Melody holler into the phone at her ear, she couldn’t help the peace that washed over her.
“I know Mel. I’m sorry,” she apologized for the 13th time since they’d gotten on the phone.
“Joy Elise Thibodeaux. What the fuck were you thinking?”
“I told you I wanted to go home Mel.”
“I know but I thought you’d let that go. We’d been having such a good time. You’ve been a rockstar at work. Ace… Why would you want to go back to those people who hurt and abandoned you?”
Joy sighed. “Old habits die hard, I guess,” she muttered.
She’d equivocated pain and neglect to love and strength for so long, that what the people she’d come to love in New York made her feel, felt like weakness.
“I know. Come home Jo Jo.”
“I… I can’t,” Joy breathed. She tilted her head towards the ceiling of her childhood bedroom to keep the tears that stung her ducts at bay.
“Why?” Mel asked softly.
“I belong here. I built this organization. I gave my blood and childhood for it. If it’s gonna burn to the ground it’ll be because I lit the match.”
Mel sighed. “I can’t say I understand but I respect it. Do what you need to do then come home. I can’t believe Ace let you leave,” she chuckled.
The sound of his name made Joy’s heart race.
“He didn’t.”
“What do you mean?”
“I knew if I had to face him, I wouldn’t go. He begged me to stay Mel and I just… I felt so conflicted. Then I felt so scared. So I left in the middle of the night while he was sleep.”
“Ooo…” Mel sang. “Have you heard from him?”
“Nope. Radio silence.” The fact that he hadn’t reached out should have been a relief, but it felt like confirmation.
He’d let her go.
She should do the same.
“I’ll call you back tomorrow okay? I need to get with Glock.”
“Ooo tell his fine ass I said hey!”
“Gross. He’s like family Mel.”
“He’s like family to you. He ain’t no kin of mine.”
“Disgusting. Bye.”
“Bye girl. I love you!” Mel sang into the phone.
Joy chuckled. “Love you too.”
“I mean it Jo Jo. I give you a hard time but good bad or ugly, I love you. Blood couldn’t make us any closer.”
The tears she’d been trying to keep at bay fell then. “I love you too girl.”