Chapter 5
That evening, Beth moved around her tiny apartment, preparing her dinner as she informed her best friends from back home of her rather sudden career change.
‘You’ve done what?’ Elsa was so shocked her voice had risen by about three octaves and Beth instinctively moved her phone further away from her face.
Not that Beth really knew what three octaves were.
She was tone-deaf and the type of person who always stayed silent during karaoke – she’d learned that lesson the hard way.
But Elsa’s reaction wasn’t at all surprising.
If Beth were honest, it was still a thought echoing through her mind, though one that hadn’t been as loud as she’d thought it would be, especially after meeting Marco and Cesca afterwards.
They’d shared in her excitement and had taken Beth for a coffee to celebrate.
She had hoped she and Marco might get a chance to talk more, but Cesca had been so full of plans, they’d barely got a word in, though her excitement was catching and Beth was soon thinking of the hows, whens, and wheres, of improving the floating bookshop.
Now, Beth wondered – hoped even – that she’d see Marco again soon, though she had no idea when.
‘When?’ Elsa asked. ‘When did you do this?’
‘Today,’ Beth replied, trying to keep her voice calm and shoving her hair behind her ear. ‘This morning.’
Earlier on, when she’d been sat with Signor Balbo and Polo at the book barge and with Marco and Cesca at the café, she’d felt certain this was the right choice, but she couldn’t deny the dread and regret starting to creep in.
She’d acted so against her nature she was unsettled, unable to sit still and even an afternoon row at the gym hadn’t fixed her anxiety.
She’d bought a book barge! Or more accurately, was in the process of buying a book barge, and she swung so wildly between excitement and terror it was impossible to sit still.
‘Can you pull out? Was it just a verbal agreement?’
‘Elsa, calm down,’ Daisy, Beth’s other best friend, said.
Elsa re-angled the phone so the two of them were fully on camera, but not before Beth caught Elsa’s disbelieving headshake.
‘Beth knows what she’s doing, don’t you?
I’m sure she’s thought this through. She never does anything without thinking it through and figuring it all out ahead of time.
But I have to admit, it is a bit of a surprise. ’
Beth stayed quiet. How did she tell them she’d done the craziest thing she’d ever done in her entire life?
The three of them had met at university and been instantly inseparable through years of hard work (Beth), hijinks (Elsa), and the perfect work/fun balance (Daisy).
They’d basically grown up together and so far had relied on each other through all the stages of life ever since, from first tentative steps into love, careers and mortgages.
Daisy and Elsa were also a couple, having discovered their love for one another when uni ended and the idea of going their separate ways, heading out into the big wide world apart, had forced them to admit their true feelings for one another.
Beth had always known those feelings were there and had been over the moon when they finally got together.
Years later, they were still as in love as ever and living an almost perfect life in a sweet little semi-detached property in Kent.
A year ago, they’d been particularly excited for Beth’s move to Venice, especially as it was to work in one of the most prestigious galleries (and cities) in the world, but she had to admit, losing her job and randomly buying a book barge was something of a sideways move that would have surprised even the most understanding of friends.
Beth cleared her throat. ‘I know it’s a bit … unexpected but—’
‘Unexpected!’ Elsa screeched, brushing a hand through her stylish hair (short on one side and longer on the other, styled to spiky perfection) in frustration.
It revealed the enormous earring joined by a chain that ran from the top of her ear to the bottom.
‘Honey, you’ve lost your job, you’re about to lose your home – you’re emotionally untethered, and instead of coming home and crying into a bottle of wine like any normal person would do, you’ve bought a bookshop …
on a barge! I mean—’ She sat back against the sofa cushions and huffed out a breath.
‘I just didn’t see that coming when we started this call. ’
‘Neither did I,’ Beth replied with a nervous giggle.
A part of her was beginning to feel slightly proud of the mad thing she’d done.
People were always offering clichéd sayings like ‘seize the moment’, and she had!
The least likely person in the world to do that!
And that was why Elsa’s reaction was exactly what she’d expected.
This was the type of thing Elsa herself would have done – but Beth?
No. And knowing Elsa had her own regrets from impulsive actions, she didn’t want Beth to have them either.
‘What Elsa means,’ Daisy interjected with an accusatory side-eye at her wife, ‘is why didn’t you call us as soon as you found out about your job?
You know we’d have been there for you. You must have been upset and shocked.
You should have called, and we could have talked everything through with you. ’
Her friend’s kindness sent a lump into Beth’s throat, but she wasn’t going to cry.
Things were looking up and when she remembered the sense of calm she’d experienced in the book barge, the feeling of the rightness of her decision returned.
She just had to hold on to that. She was making a new future for herself and, if she were honest, they’d both reacted exactly as she thought they would.
Elsa was always more direct while Daisy was kinder, softer, and both approaches had their merits.
Daisy could be relied upon for good hugs and tissues, while Elsa would say the things you didn’t always want to hear but knew you had to listen to.
‘I know you would, sweetie,’ Beth replied, ‘but it was just such a shock. I didn’t really know what to do with myself. My brain literally couldn’t contemplate it all. I ended up just wandering around for a bit and then having a coffee and eating a whole plate of baicoli.’
‘So you went and bought a boat instead?’ This time Elsa’s comment earned her a jab in the ribs and Beth smothered a laugh.
‘What did I say this time?’ she asked Daisy before turning back to the screen, rubbing her side.
‘I’m sorry, Bethy, you know I love you, but it’s just …
you never do anything impulsive. That’s just not … you!’
‘I know.’ A half-laugh escaped her mouth, sounding more like a puff of air.
The maelstrom of feelings she’d been swept up in clarified for a moment, like the clouds clearing after a storm and the images that had played in her mind that morning – happy and contented scenes that left a strange feeling of fulfilment inside her – sprung up again.
‘But you know what? I don’t think I regret it.
Not yet at least. And you should see it, El, it’s gorgeous.
I mean, it needs a little bit of work, because it’s kind of a mess and the space isn’t used as efficiently as it could be, but that doesn’t matter, I’ve got someone who can help with that.
But when I was sat inside, it just felt so homey.
So … sweet. I could totally see myself finishing work for the day, content and happy, and closing the door with a smile on my face. Is that mad?’
‘A bit,’ Elsa replied with a teasing smile. ‘But there’s a look in your eye I like. I haven’t seen it for a while. It’s challenge mixed with certainty. You used to get it when you were talking about your next course or career move.’
Daisy smiled at her wife, but as she turned to the phone, the smile faded. ‘But where will you live once your flat’s revoked?’
‘I’ll find somewhere. I’ve a few weeks here yet—’ Beth signalled to the small living room she was currently sitting in.
As the property was rented by the society who funded her post, she hadn’t been allowed to hang anything on the boring, pale cream walls or really personalise it any way.
Stacks of books were the only real decoration.
She found she was drawn to history books and historical fiction, but she couldn’t deny she loved a bit of historical crime and romance.
She went through phases where she’d read a lot of history books, her attention caught by a certain subject but then she’d need the engrossing writing of fiction.
Something to grab her and help her escape to another life, another time.
Perhaps it was time for her to think about setting up a permanent home here in Venice and buying instead of renting a flat.
She could have book prints on the walls, bookshelves lined with books, maybe even some specially chosen pieces of art.
After all, she’d kind of decided this was it from now on anyway, what with buying the book barge.
It made more sense to pay a mortgage rather than rental fees if she could find somewhere she could afford.
‘Don’t worry.’ Beth popped a crostini into her mouth. She’d bought herself a picky tea on the way back from the meeting with Signor Balbo, knowing she’d be too lazy to cook and the array of tiny, tasty crostini, olives, artichokes and cured meats was the perfect thing to eat while she talked.
‘Tomorrow I’m going to find a new place to live. I’ve got some money saved for a deposit as I haven’t had to pay rent on this place. The money from Granny and Gramps has paid for the barge so it’s all good financially. My budget will be tight, but it is doable.’
Elsa added, ‘Until you need a regular monthly income to pay for bills and food.’
This time, Daisy stared daggers. ‘Can you not be so … so—’
‘So what?’