Riven
“The thoughts come crawling one by one, bah-dah, bah-dah.
The thoughts come crawling one by one, bah-dah, bah-dah.
The thoughts come crawling one by one,
And every whisper weighs a ton,
And they all go marching through my mind
To drown my calm…
Boom, boom, boom, boom.”
I snicker under my breath as Creed’s shoulder slams into the door in perfect synchrony with my song.
Let’s see if we can time it again, shall we?
“The walls lean closer two by two, bah-dah, bad-dah.
The walls lean closer two by two, bah-dah, bah-dah.
The walls lean closer two by two,
Till every breath is something new,
And they all go pressing on my chest,
Till I can’t rest…
Boom, boom, boom, boom.”
My head falls back in laughter as it, in fact, does.
I wonder how long we can get this to last.
“The shadows whisper three by three, bah-dah, bah-dah.
The shadows whisper three by three, bah-dah, bah-dah
The shadows whisper three by three,
They know the things I shouldn’t see,
And they all go scratching at my thoughts
Till reason’s lost…
Boom, boom, boom, boom.”
The mirth falling from my lips morphs into a shriek as I’m snatched from my seat by the collar of my shirt.
Creed’s gloriously boring gray eyes burn into mine. There’s the itsy-bitsiest amount of white around his pupils. If my angry little brother’s power were to be working at the moment, I’d probably be blind from how bright his irises would glow.
“Quit fucking humming before I snap your neck.”
“I really appreciate the fact you’re trying to cheer me up right now by teasing, but I’m not much in the teasing mood.”
He snarls as he draws his fist back and my smirk widens.
“Enough, both of you,” Kyzen says as he shoves us apart. “Fighting each other is going to get us fuck all nowhere. Can you both focus?”
“What would you like me to focus on? We’ve tried jumping off your balcony, climbing out the windows, and slamming into the door. What else do you have in mind?” I ask.
“Anything is better than sitting around, listening to you fucking hum.”
I scoff at Creed. “No, it isn’t. It’s a waste of energy. I’m going to sit right here and wait for my angel to kick that door down. It’ll be any minute now.”
“Please get a grip, Riven. You can’t even access your Chaos, but you’re being ridiculous,” Amick says from the corner of the room.
Even after I picked on him about putting himself in timeout, he still didn’t budge from that corner.
“Thayla isn’t coming because she can’t come. She isn’t even in Valveilious anymore.”
“You don’t know that for certain, smart-ass,” I sneer.
“I do, and so do you, despite your unwillingness to admit it. It’s been hours since we felt her soul.”
This time, Creed, Kyzen, and I turn our glares on him.
He, honest to the Valories, rolls his eyes at us.
“I don’t have it in me to sugarcoat this for you all right now.”
“Of course you don’t. So, you sour little shit, how about you share with us whatever grand plan you’ve come up with?”
He holds my gaze as he pivots his body in my direction.
“I don’t have one yet.”
A harsh bark of a laugh wails out of me as I grip my stomach.
“Great. Lovely. Fan-fucking-tastic. So you’ve gotten us into this shit but can’t get us out. Swell.”
I throw my hands up, then flop back down on the couch. My nose curls at the looks Creed and Kyzen are giving me.
“What?”
“It isn’t his fault we’re here, and you’re not going to put all the blame on him. We all agreed to come here. Even you.”
I tsk and wave Kyzen off.
Yes, technically, he is correct, but Amick’s the one who got stabby-happy and pierced a dagger through ol’ Harriseen’s chest.
Had he not done that, we never would’ve had to face the Beginning Gods to begin with.
“He’s right. This is my fault and I will figure this out.”
“No,” Kyzen shouts. “We’re not starting this—”
In seconds, we’re all on our feet, aligned side by side as a knock at the door echoes around this stupid-ass makeshift living room.
Our glares intensify as Calista strolls in with a smile. She snaps behind her, and my hope sinks like a boulder falling into the sea when rather than it being Thayla, two Attendants follow behind her.
“I figured you all might be thirsty and hungry by this point.”
“Where the fuck is Thayla?” Creed asks as he takes a step forward.
“Don’t fret over your Binder. She’s safe and sound at your home.” She shrugs with a fake-ass innocent smile. “I assume.”
“What do you mean by assume?” Amick asks.
“Well, it’s been a while since I’ve visited the Godsdawn, and I simply couldn’t send her to the first location that came to mind. The second that popped up was the Court. Your father and I spent many nights there under the moon—”
“You starshot our Binder to the fucking Court?” Creed grits out.
“Where else would you have had me send her?”
“Nowhere. In here. With us. What the actual fuck is wrong with you?”
Her eyes narrow on Creed. It does nothing to deter him. His glare meets hers head-on and I run my thumb across my lip.
It’s so fitting that Death and Creation get along the least.
“Nothing is wrong with me for wanting to spend time with my sons.”
“I’m not your son. Can I go?”
She gasps, and fake-ass tears spring to her eyes as she lays her hand against her heart.
“Now, Riven. That’s very hurtful. I’ve always treated you and looked at you as my own. If it weren’t for me, you wouldn’t even be here.”
My face scrunches as I drag out an umm. “If my memory serves me correctly, you left me in the Abandon more weekends than not. I believe your words were, ‘He’s too messy for my home.’”
“Well”—she clears her throat and tilts her chin up—“you were a very rambunctious child once your Chaos came out. Prior to that, you spent plenty of time here.”
“Then after the first few times he didn’t come, and I kept killing all your shit, I became too much,” Creed tacks on.
“There was no sense in you killing my creations. You did it just for attention.”
“Attention? I couldn’t control my power without Riven. If it weren’t for…”
Creed tilts his head, then turns to face me.
Uh-oh.
Looks like the ol’ God of Death just figured out my secret.
“And over the years, you gained control, and I allowed you to come more. It all worked out perfectly.”
“Perfectly?” Kyzen repeats.
“Oh, my sweet boy. You remember how amazing it was growing up here, yes?”
He shakes his head as he runs his hand down his face.
“We didn’t grow up here. Our time here went from every weekend, to every other, to once a month, to once a year, then never. You’d randomly show up in the Abandon, tell us to stop arguing with our father and make things worse, then you’d leave. What version of history do you actually remember?”
My chuckle slips through my lips as her eye twitches.
That shit looks crazy as shit.
Coming from someone who knows crazy pretty well, that’s saying something.
“Have you been spending time with the Slut of Seduction by chance?”
She lets out an outraged gasp and flings her arms up. The drink tray in the Attendant’s hand goes flying in the air, and the glass shatters on impact against the floor.
“You stupid, insolent creature,” Calista wails and raises her hand as the Attendant crumbles to her knees.
Before she can bring her open palm down, Kyzen’s fingers wrap around her wrist.
“Don’t you dare strike her.”
Her breath shudders. “You’d rather defend an Attendant over your own mother?”
“She did nothing wrong to deserve your anger.”
“She has one job. One role. And that is to hold the drink tray. She failed to do that.”
“No. You smacked it out of her hands. You failed to control your temper.”
She staggers away from him as though he just smacked her.
Her face falls into a deadly serious stare as her gaze roams across us.
“Stop looking at me like that. All of you. I am your mother. Not a monster.”
“No.”
The cold, one-word denial from Amick has the temperature in the room dropping below freezing.
“Just because you carried us in your womb, that does not make you a mother.”
Her chest rises and falls as she stares him down.
“I believe I liked it better when you were quiet.”
“I’m sure you did. You never did like to hear me tell you all the things Father said and did to me. You couldn’t even bother to open the door for me. It was too hard for you then to face the truth. It seems that hasn’t changed at all.”
My brows draw together as I glance at the side of his face.
What in the hell is he talking about?
My eyes cut to Kyzen, but he quickly tears his attention from me.
Oh. Assholes. They’re keeping secrets from me.
Not cool.
“I don’t understand why you four have created these horrible scenarios of me and are saying things that never happened, but I will prove to you that I’m a great mother. Always have been and always will be. We will have plenty of time to catch up and get history straight.”
“Not happening. You’re going to let us out of this room now.”
She shakes her head at Creed.
“No, I am not. Your Binder seems to be the only being you all care about, and she’s safe. For now. You deny me my rightful time, and that will change. Mark my words. I bring life into this realm. I, too, can take it away.”
She holds Creed’s glare, letting her warning ring loud and clear.
With a snap of her fingers, she orders the Attendants to clean up the mess, then leave us be.
We sit here silently until they leave.
“That’s not how her power works. She can only eliminate creations she specifically made. Such as all those gods-awful flowers. She can’t just snap her fingers and kill Thayla,” Amick says.
“She can’t. Our father can. Regardless of her admitting it or not, he’s always been her weapon. Unbeknownst to her, though, handing Thayla over to him would make him very happy.”
The three of us face Creed as he stares at the door like his eyes can kill the power surrounding it.
Not going to happen, unfortunately.
“Has anyone gotten through to Derivius yet?” Kyzen asks.
“If we had, we would’ve already said something.”
“I was just asking and this isn’t the time for your sarcasm, Riven. If you weren’t paying any attention two minutes ago, things just got very fucking serious. Thayla’s in real danger now if we don’t do whatever the hell she wants. Do you understand that?”
“Oh, I understand, brother. Don’t worry.”
I sigh as I sink back into the couch.
I understand that if something happens to my angel while we’re locked away in here, then Valveilious can kiss itself goodbye.
Once I’m done unleashing more Chaos than this realm’s ever seen, I’ll storm the streets of the Abandon and paint that motherfucker burgundy.
Maybe even blue.
My two sides will come together as one just as they did when I killed Obsidian and I’ll release that special kind of hell all across that ashy wasteland.
I’m sure there’s another Seductions already built.
I’ll blow that fucking place up as well, then dance among the rubble with my Binder by my side.
My brothers will be there as well. All three of them.
The last thing the Beginning Gods want to do is keep fucking with me.
I—we’ve—listened to their rules, abided by the laws. Mostly.
There are no laws when it comes to my little burden.
She is the only being in this realm who can bring me back from the brink of total chaos.
I chuckle as I lean my head against the back of the couch. The daydream I concoct of Thayla and me skipping hand in hand down the streets of the Abandon as it burns tickles me down to my belly.
“The flames go rising four by four, bah-dah, bah-dah.
The flames go rising four by four, bah-dah, bah-dah.
The flames go rising four by four,
I throw the vials and watch them soar,
And they all go raining down in glass,
The flames eat the mass…
Ha, ha, ha, ha.
The ashes gather five by five, bah-dah, bah-dah.
The ashes gather five by five, bah-dah, bah-dah
The ashes gather five by five,
Funny you thought you’d leave alive,
And my angel flies through the night,
With wings of light…
Ha, ha, ha, ha.”