39. Chapter Thirty-Nine
Chapter Thirty-Nine
T he farmhouse was noisier than usual. As I opened the front door, I could hear laughter, raised voices and the clink of glasses.
‘She’s here,’ I heard Seb say. ‘I’ll tell her the good news.’
I hung my jacket on the end of the banister, and Seb ran into the hall. He grabbed me by the waist, lifting me off my feet and swinging me round and round before laughing and kissing me deeply.
‘What’s going on?’
I noticed Seb’s eyes darken as he took in my red puffy face, but even the bedraggled sight of me couldn’t dampen his enthusiasm. ‘We did it,’ he said, grabbing my hands and jumping up and down like an excited child. ‘Liv, we bloody did it.’
‘Did what?’
‘The council has granted planning permission. We can build the treehouses, we can get the lake project off the ground.
‘Wow, that’s amazing. Congratulations.’
Seb let go of my hands and took a step back. ‘Hang on, why aren’t you as excited as I am? It was you who did most of the work. Liv, what’s going on?’
‘Let’s go through to the dining room,’ I said. ‘There’s something I need to say, and it’s best you all hear it together.’
‘Liv, what’s going on? You’re scaring me.’
I ignored Seb and walked into the dining room. The table was covered with plates of cake and glasses of champagne. Harry, Pat, Stephan, and Maggie cheered and clapped when I walked into the room. I made my best attempt at a smile as Harry handed me a glass of champagne.
‘Thank you.’
‘It’s the least we owe you. We couldn’t have done this without you, Liv. Now we’ve got planning permission, we can move full steam ahead with our plans. God, when I think about all the possibilities for this place.’ Harry brushed a tear from her eye. ‘This would make my grandparents so proud, and I’ve got you and Seb to thank for it.’
I took a long sip of my champagne. ‘I’m so pleased it’s worked out for you all.’
‘Worked out for us , Liv. You’re as much a part of Lowen Farm’s future as any of us.’
Exhaustion hit me, and I pulled out a chair, no longer able to hold up my own weight.
‘Liv, is everything all right?’ asked Pat. ‘You look a little peaky. Is it hay fever? Mine’s terrible at this time of year.’
Seb pulled out a chair beside me and tried to catch my eye. ‘Liv? What’s wrong?’
I hiccupped and fought back tears. ‘There’s something I need to tell you all.’
One by one, my friends pulled out chairs and sat down. A stray balloon bumped its way across the table and Maggie knocked it to the floor. The celebratory atmosphere of moments ago had been replaced by a thick air of tension.
‘I…’ Unable to speak, I took a deep breath and lifted my wine glass to my lips with shaking hands. ‘I’m so sorry everyone, but I’m afraid Bertie and I are leaving Lowen Farm.’
‘What?’ Harry jumped up, knocking her wine glass over and sending sticky liquid rolling across the table. Maggie grabbed a tissue from her pocket and began mopping up the mess. ‘Leaving? Why? The project is only just getting started. Aren’t you happy here?’
‘Harry, I’ve been happier here than at any time in my life.’
‘Then why go?’ Seb’s voice was hard, cold, his body rigid as he stared down at the table.
‘I have to consider what’s in Bertie’s best interests.’
‘And staying here isn’t?’ asked Pat, his voice catching.
‘My husband has asked if I’ll give our marriage another try. It’s the right thing for Bertie.’
‘Couldn’t he move in here with you?’ asked Stephan. ‘You could take on an extra room, so you have more space.’
I almost laughed at the thought of Rob moving into Lowen Farm. Almost, but not quite. ‘My husband has rented a house on the estate where we used to live.’
‘I can’t believe you’re doing this,’ said Harry, her voice quiet, her hands shaking. ‘There’s got to be more to it.’ She stared at me, but I avoided her gaze.
‘There’s nothing more to it than wanting to create a proper family for Bertie. It’s for the best, I’m sure of it.’
Seb pushed his chair back and stormed out of the room.
‘I’ll go after him,’ said Harry.
‘When do you leave?’ asked Maggie.
‘My in-laws are coming to fetch us on Sunday morning.’
‘Sunday? But that’s only three days away.’
‘I know. I’m sorry.’ I ran out of the dining room and up the stairs to my bedroom. Railing against the cruelty of life, I took my anger out against my pillow, thumping it with my fists as hot, angry tears streamed down my cheeks.
Half an hour later, a knock came on my bedroom door. I opened it to find Harry, her cheeks flushed and her own eyes red-rimmed. ‘Can I come in?’
I stood aside to let her pass. She walked through the room and sat down on Bertie’s bed. ‘I’m sorry,’ I said, sitting down on my own.
‘Liv, you owe me the truth.’
‘I’ve told you the truth.’
‘No, you haven’t. You’ve been acting strangely for a couple of weeks now. There’s more to your leaving that you’re not telling me. Why won’t you trust me?’
I played with the corner of the duvet cover, twisting and folding it between my fingers.
‘Liv? Talk to me.’
‘I can’t.’
‘You’re scaring me, Liv. What’s going on?’
‘Please, Harry, don’t push it.’
‘Liv, I’m your friend. You can tell me anything.’
I shook my head, not trusting myself to speak. It was better for everyone that I took my problems elsewhere.
‘Fine, if that’s how you’re going to be, I don’t suppose there’s much I can do about it. But, Liv?’
I looked up at Harry.
‘I know there’s more to this. You’ll learn soon enough that shutting people out never helps anything.’
Harry was right, of course, but what she didn’t understand was that I had no choice.
Harry stopped at the door and turned back to me. ‘Oh, and Liv? You owe Seb one hell of an explanation.’