Chapter Sixteen Fractures and Faults
"It's not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters."
Adan didn't want to leave the cabin, it felt like she had just arrived.
She was just starting to get comfortable around Nox.
She might have even regret avoiding him, missing out on possible time--now lost.
Her feelings immediately changed when she found out that the king had only summoned Nox.
She was furious that he had left her at the cabin.
He said she could come if she could fly, smirking that sly grin when he knew she would refuse.
The bastard.
Adan stood at the edge of the cabin, watching the distant sky, where Nox had disappeared into the rising morning sun.
His departure was sudden, the sharp rush of air as his wings beat against the wind still echoing in her ears.
And now, here she was—left behind. To make matters worse, Nox left Thammas to watch her while he flew back to the capital for our king's summons.
Something about his absence gnawed at her, leaving an empty space in her chest.
"I don't need a babysitter." She scoffed at Nox's second.
"You don't?" His voice laced with mock sincerity.
He had a smug air about him—like he was already judging her.
Adan rolled her eyes. "I don't need your supervision."
She rephrased, pushed past him, her tone sharp.
Adan wondered how much Thammas knew about her past.
What had Nox told him? What information could she get out of him before Nox returned?
She suspected that Thammas was not particularly found of Adan, not that she gave a damn.
She headed back to the house, digging her nails into her palms.
In truth, she didn't know much about Thammas, but to Adan, he was just another obstacle.
One, she didn't feel like dealing with today.
Adan plopped down in her favourite armchair in front of the fire. Thammas caught the door before it could close in his face, following closely behind her.
He glanced around, unmoving.
Adan's jaw tightened at the massive brute that was standing before her--and obviously wasn't going anywhere, anytime soon.
She sighed, grabbing her book from the side table, opening it to resting it on her lap. "What do you think the king summoned him for?"
Thammas shrugged off his jacket to hang it up.
"Best case, it's about an update on your progress in finding Captain Jax."
He glanced over his shoulder, narrowing his eyes at her.
Did Thammas know that Adan knew Captain Jax is Nox?
Adan wished that Nox had stayed-- if only to clear up this confusing game of Guess-What-I-Know.
"And worst?"
"At worst, Cias already knows of our deceit and Nox is already in a cell--or dead."
I guess that answers that.
Thammas watched her carefully for a response. "Which means that you will be thrown in with him."
Adan lifted a brow. "That's assuming they catch me."
Thammas scoffed, crossing his arms. "And here I thought you were supposed to be the realistic one."
Adan didn't dignify that with a response.
Instead, she flipped open her book, pretending to be engrossed in the words she didn't actually read.
Nox being summoned wasn't good, but she refused to let the worry show on her face.
She was used to keeping her emotions locked down—especially around people she didn't know or trust.
And Thammas? She didn't trust him one bit--even if he was Nox's second.
She could feel his eyes on her, watching, assessing. It was irritating.
"Do you always stare at people like that, or is it just me?" she asked, not looking up.
He let out a low chuckle. "Just you."
Thammas walked over to the hearth and leaned against the stone mantle. "You could tell the king, what you know about Nox. Cias would offer you clemency."
Adan physically bristled and snapped the book closed, fury rippling across her face. "Is that what you think of me? A coward and a rat?!"
Thammas didn't flinch at her outburst. If anything, he looked bored. "I think you're a survivor." He smiled softly, and shrugged. "I doubt anyone would bat an eye if the king's favourite pet saved herself."
Adan shot to her feet, the book tossed on the chair behind her+, while fists clenched at her side. "There's a difference."
"Is there?" He arched a silver brow.
She wanted to hit him. It would feel really good to hit him.
But she forced herself to take a slow breath through her nose.
Losing her temper wouldn't help anything—not with him.
She was supposed to be working on her rage...
and smashing his orbital bone to pieces was not going to do her any favours.
Adan crossed her arms instead, glaring up at him. "You think I'd betray Nox?"
"I think," Thammas said, slow and deliberate, "that you don't owe him anything."
But the idea of betraying Nox—of him believing, for even a second, that she would—made something ugly crawl under her skin.
She never once cared what other people thought--until now.
Adan took a step, lifting her chin. "You don't know me."
The height difference made her feel insignificant—Thammas was a literal tower compared to her.
The corner of his mouth quirked upward, his silver eyes narrowing slightly. "No. But I know what people do when they're desperate."
Adan hesitated.
It was barely noticeable, just a flicker... but Thammas saw it, and his smug smirk splayed wide.
"Thammas... hear me when I say this, GO. FUCK. YOURSELF." She did not wait to hear his response, or see his reaction. She stormed out of the house, slamming the door behind her.
His laughter followed her out the door. Not loud, but amused enough to make her blood boil.
Adan clenched her teeth, so much for not letting her anger get the best of her. Thammas sure was an arrogant bastard, and worst of all--he was right.
Adan could be the most wanted woman in all of Lymia--she already had the notoriety, and was recognizable enough.
There would be no where that she could hide from Cias if he put a bounty on her head.
Of course, she would run--return to the woods, rather than betray Nox.
In doing so, it would mean giving up her life-long vendetta for him, but she wasn't going to look too closely at that.
The warm spring air whipped her hair, and she knew then and there that Thammas had no idea who she was, not truly.
He wouldn't understand that she could never turn Nox in, not only because she didn't want to, but because he held leverage of his own.
Adan was worth way more than Nox. He was just another rebel, she was the last phoenix.
She crossed her arms against the cool breeze and steeled her back.
Even if they didn't have leverage against one another, Adan couldn't—would never turn on Nox.
That wasn't who she was, and she definitely wasn't a coward.
Thammas didn't follow her outside, she suspected that he was proud of himself for how he had treated her.
She stomped towards the stables, searching for something--anything far from the cabin.
If she didn't keep her hands busy, she might storm back into that house and slam her daggers into Thammas's flesh.
He would heal—eventually.
--
Adan hid in the stables for most of the day, cleaned the stalls and the two horses that the small barn housed. Anything to keep her away from Nox's pompous second. It kept her busy, so much so she did not even notice the sun setting over the hill.
She was currently brushing down a well-tempered chestnut when she heard the unmissable sound of wings, and his scent hit her even over the smell of the horses.
Adan's head snapped towards the opening in the barn to find Nox standing there.
His wings gone, but his blue-black hair wind tousled from the flight.
The barn suddenly seemed too small as he stalked forward, eating up the space between them.
Adan tried and failed to ignore him, continuing to groom the sweet mare in front of her.
She snickered and nuzzled into Nox's open palm once he was close enough. Adan could see his large hand rubbing her muzzle, while he whispered softly to her in another language. It was beautiful and demanding all at once, and Adan couldn't help the nagging feeling that she had heard it before.
"Anything I should know?" She interrupted his soft cooing with the horse.
"Nothing you don't know already." Nox moved back against the stall walls, and watched Adan intently while she continued to groom his horse. "He asked for an update on our progress. I gave an excuse, and it should buy us a few more days, maybe a week, but, he is becoming impatient."
"You're lucky that he didn't demand the truth from you. You must have thoroughly convinced him that you are loyal then."
"No different than you." He tilted his head, his hair fell forward with the movement.
"I have done horrible things to make sure that he never suspected me of anything else." The words were soft, but not shy. "What do we do now?"
They were running out of time, and hiding in the countryside wasn't helping anyone. The king would soon find out that his two most trustworthy members of his court were playing him. They needed a plan--a real one--and soon.
"We need to return to the city."
Adan gave him an indolent look, she knew that already. She just wanted specifics. When he didn't respond, "do you still not trust me?" She snapped, losing all sense of control. Nox had that affect on her, and Thammas had already wound her up.
She was ready to blow.
Nox didn't react right away. He just watched her, those unreadable, vibrant green eyes locked onto hers. It infuriated her. Then, he sighed, tilting his head again. "It's not about trust."
Adan let out a sharp laugh, disbelieving. "Bullshit."
His lips twitched, but not into a smile. "It's about risk."
Adan set down the brush with deliberate calm, turning to face him fully. "You're saying, I'm a liability."
Nox pushed off the stall wall, stepping closer. "I'm saying I can't afford to be wrong about you."
Her mouth snapped closed at that. Did Adan only trust him because she had to? Because he knew her deepest secret, and vice versa.
Nox loosed a deep sigh, and rubbed at the bridge of his nose.
She wanted to throw something. Instead, she crossed her arms tightly over her chest.