24. Twenty Four
I wake again, feeling more myself and infinitely more vengeful.
Kairon is sound asleep, softly snoring and cradling one of my hands in his.It didn”t even occur to me earlier that I was taking over his bed, but seeing him seated in the chair beside me withjusthis head resting on the bed makes my stomachdoflips.
He could have kept me anywhere, evenjuston the other side of the wall in myownbed, with countless guards and the healer watching me.And yet, all he wants is to be by my side. A lump grows in my throat, thinking ofall the thingswe almost didn”t get a chance to say.
The apology was sitting on his tongue when we danced yesterday, so close I could almost hear it already. But when it came down to it, he couldn”t bring himself to say those words, and I nearly left this world without hearing them.
Anger, heartache, and relief all war within me as I adjust to being awake again, listening as Kairon”s quiet snores fill the room. I want to yell at him for the things he said. I even want to slap him. I want to fight with him and let out every single thing he made me feel when he made those horrible comments.
Of course, forgiveness for the things he said won”t come immediately. So many cruel moments stand between us, keeping us apart.But there”s no longer any denying that these walls we”ve built to keep ourselves safe havedone nothing but destroyus both from the inside out.
There will be time laterfor usto make up for the thingssaid and done.But for now, we have work to do.
Someone has left a tray of food on the table just inside the door, and the large container of wateris makingme drool; I”m so parched it aches. I ease my hand out of Kai”s as gently as I can to give him a few more minutes of sleep. Slowly, I crawl out of the bed, disturbing it as little as possible.
On just the balls of my feet, I make my way to the table, sitting on a chair beside it.The water goes downa lotfaster than Iprobablyought to drink it, but I”ve never felt this kind of thirst before.I go slower with the food. Part of me is scared that somehow, something inside of me is still a gaping hole, and the food will disturb my healing.
The food went cold long before I got my hands on it, but quite frankly, I do not give a fuck. I”m starving, parched, and absolutely freezing, and the food barely eases the ache in my stomach from being so hungry.
Movement from the bed catches my attention, and Iglance at it, watching Kairon from my vantage point as his hand pats around on the bed, searching for me even before his eyes have opened. His roaming fingers freeze, his head shooting up immediately upon finding the bed empty.
He stands so suddenly that the chair behind him tips over, and he spins toward the front door, undoubtedly ready to go in search of whoever”s dared to take me now.
Instead, his wild, bloodshot eyes reach mine, and he stops mid-step.
”Good morning, Your Majesty.”
”Elva,”he sighs. ”How long have you been awake? How are you feeling?”
A small grin pulls at my lips, and I continue chewing to stifle it. After swallowing, I answer, ”I”m alright. I just woke up, drank all the water, and ate all the food. Sorry,”I grimace.
He breathes out a laugh. ”That”s alright. You needed it after what you”ve been through. Still cold?”
”Yeah, a bit. How long have we been asleep?”I ask.
He shrugs, looking out the window. ”At least a day, I would imagine.”
”An entire day?”I stand suddenly. ”How could we have slept that long? There”s so much to be done. What about the other visiting representatives? The treaties?”
”The Eyes and Maren have managed everything,”he assures me, both hands held up placatingly. ”They”re all waiting to be alerted that it”s time to finish what we started here and go home.”
”Okay.”I nod, excited for allofthe debating and drama to finallybe over with.”Should we go do that now?”
He shakes his head. ”Not yet. First, you and I have a date with two Syrens and a traitor.”
A hot sparkle of malice lights up my spine, the first time in my life I”ve felt this need for violence. For vengeance.
”Really?”
His eyes flare in surprisefor a moment, perhaps taken aback by my enthusiasm. But then a wicked smile lights up his face, something dark and wicked lurking in the depths of the gray in his eyes. ”Really,”he finally answers, his gaze locked on mine and filled with anticipation. ”But I”m curious what it is you have in mind for them.”
”I guess you”ll just have to wait and see.”I shrug, not ready to spoil the surprise of what manner of chaos I”m about to unleash on Shan.
A groan, nearly a growl, escapes him as he walks toward me.Iwonderif he”s going to kiss me right now and if his hunger for memight matchhis thirst for revenge.But instead, he grips my hand in his, pulling me behind him toward our destination.
As he walks and I jog to keep up with him, he explains, ”The dungeons are through my office. It”s the only way in or out.Well,except for the river running underneath,butno one has gone that way and survived.If the rocks don”t tear them apart on their way to the ocean, the Syrens will.
A cold, wicked excitement crawls under my skin, leaving goosebumps in its wake. For years, I”ve been led to believe that my anger, the rage living in my chest,is going tolead to my detriment. And yet, embracing that part of meis bringingme more peace than I”ve felt in all my years of biting my tongue and charming people rather than causing them pain with my abilities.
He leads me through a hidden door in the war room, down several flights of stairs, and into a dank, wet cavern so dark it”s almost impossible to see.
As our steps slow, a choking sound reaches us in the distance.
”Hmm, it seems Shan might be doing worse than I expected,”Kairon coldly comments. ”And the Syrens are suspiciously quiet.”
”Wait.”I come to a stop.
Kairon”s steps stutter, and he spins around, quickly searching me for any sign of distress. ”What”s wrong?”
”Nothing,”I assure him. ”But you forgot your helm. Your cloak.”
”Darling Elva.”He pulls me by my hand closer until I have to tilt my head up to look at him. ”No one in that room who is about to see my face is going to live to tell anyone about it.”
”Oh.”I nod, the finality of what”s about to happen coming into focus.I”vebeen a part of negotiations before, and my talents were incredibly usefulduring them.But I”venever allowed myselfto fully explore how horrid they could be.AndI supposenow I”m finally going to.And in the end, Kairon will kill them.
I tell myself it”s not because of me. But because they betrayed him, they infiltrated his home, which can”t go unpunished.
When the room comes into my line of sight, I nearly double over and vomit. Rusty weapons sit just outside the barred cage. The Syrens are scraping at the floor, fingertips bloody and raw from trying to reach them. There are pieces of what looks like bloody lumps of scales and light pink flesh scattered amongst the floor. Both Syrens have red eyes, swollen from crying.
Shan sits in the back, hacking away, hardly able to moveat all.
Kairon tilts his head, looking at him strangely. He leansdownto quietly mention, ”They”ve only been down here a day or two. No infection should have taken hold that quickly.”
”Perhaps he was already ill.”I shrug. ”Does it matter? You”ll kill him long before any sickness could.”
He grins at me, playful and malicious and devastatingly handsome. Almost hauntingly so, like he”s the God of death himself.Which, I suppose,is an entirely accurate description.If ever there was a man who possessed a godlike power, it”s this one.
Andhe”sgoing to use it all to avenge wrongs that were done to me.
Before I can let that thought get too far, before the warmth it fills me with can push me to do something foolish, something slams into the bar in front of me, startling me out of the staring contest Kai and I were having.
Kai presses me behind him, and we both watch as Shan throws himself against the bars again and again.
”Kill the girl,”he mutters to himself. ”Kill the girl and then hide. Kill girl. Kill, kill, kill.”
The Syrens beside him shrink back, hiding in the corner together and whimpering from fear and pain as they scrape their legs on the hard floor, fleeing from Shan”s madness.
”Shan,”Kairon says, trying to get his attention.
Shan looks right through him, veiny eyes wide open and trained on me as he runs and hits himself against the bars again, tearing at them desperately and screeching his frustration. Repeatedly, he mutters kill girl, doing anything to crawl out of the cage he”s within.
”He”s gone completely mad,”I say, stepping around Kairon. I refuse to hide from this, from the carnage in front of me.
Kairon sighs. ”It must have something to do with whoever destroyed his memories. All he knows is that he has to kill you, then wait. Now that he knows you”re alive, nothing else will register in his mind.”
”So what do we do?”
He shrugs, watching impassively as Shan tears his own skin apart on the hard columns as he tries to squeeze through the bars. ”Put the fucker out of his misery.”
”But we don”t have any answers from him.”I tug on his arm, pulling his attention back to me. ”You can”t kill him yet.”
”Once he dies, he might calm the fuck down and give us something useful,”he suggests. ”If not... well, he”ll be dead and harmless. To you, anyway.”
”To me?” I ask.
He nods, leaning in to share a secret with me, ”I”m still very much going to use him to kill our enemies. Call it a cruel irony, a vicious and poetic end.”
My cheeks warm.Hisoverwhelming attention while so cavalierly demanding someone”s head makes my body heatall over. He notes the change, his eyes heating as they search my face. For a fraction of a second, his gaze drops to my lips, and I”m reminded of that day in the market so long ago when, even then, my body craved to give in to his wicked taunts.
”And we still have two more prisoners. Once Shan is neutralized, you can do all the torturing you want, and I”ll happily watch.”
Torture.It”s not always an effective approach, butit”sone I can almost guarantee working when it”s done my way. External torture will never be as effective as the tricks our own bodies can play on us.
I nod, and within seconds, Shan”s body falls to the floor in my peripherals, the Syrens” screams filling the air as he does. Kairon”s eyes never even left mine. He didn”t so much as flinch, his power silently stealing the life from Shan without the king showing an ounce of effort.
From the corner of my eye, the corpse starts to rise again. Kai turns to him, not speaking aloud, but I get the feeling he”s giving ordersof some kind.While I”mnot entirely surehow his power works, Idoknow he doesn”t need to use his voice to make commands.
He exhales heavily, frustration evident, before letting the body drop again. ”Nothing useful. His memories are effectively completely empty, aside from orders to kill the girl and wait for someone to come find him. No faces, no voices even. The only glimpse of a memory in there is a Syren song infiltrating his every thought, the music taking him from one disjointed thought to the next.”
My nose scrunches. ”Can you just... move him elsewhere?”
He looks at me with a brow raised. ”Are you making demands of me in my own kingdom, Miss Elva?”
With a laugh, I shove against his shoulder. ”Just asking a favor. I”m not sure I”ll be able to focus with his dead body so close to me.”
”You get used to it,”he assures me, making me a little bit queasy to think more dead bodies are going to be in my near future. ”But I”ll send him away since you asked so nicely.”
”Thank you.”
The dead Shan, who doesn”t look deadat all, stands, waiting patiently for something. Kai produces a key from his pocket, unlocks the door, and opens it just enough to let Shan through. The corpse doesn”t even look at us; he just walks by with a blank stare, walking the opposite way we came. His steps grow quiet as he disappears down the dark hall.
Directing my attention back to the Syrens clutching each other in the corner, dried blood crusting along their legs and arms. They stare at me, abject horror on their faces.Neitherof themhas even looked at Kairon orattheir only possible doorway for escape.Instead, terror fills their faces as their gazes stay locked on me.
”After you, Elva.”The king holds the door open for me, and the Syrens become inconsolable.
”Don”t let her touch us,”one of them pleads with the king, pushing her black hair streaked with crimson blood out of her face. ”Please! We”ll tell you anything; just please don”t let her touch me.”
Confusion fills the king”s face, and he looks at me before looking back at her.
”Why?”
The other answers, ”I... I don”t know— we don”t know, but you can”t let her touch us! It”ll be a fate worse than any torture.”
”Just kill us now, please! You can”t let her touch us. They said—”Her eyes roll back in her head, lids fluttering like she”s fighting for lucidity. ”Don”t let her touch. Her touch is the torture of a thousand slow deaths. A million tiny slices of agony that your body won”t let succumb to the sweet relief of dying.”
For a moment, I”m scared the king will use this as a reason not to trust me. The reveal of a secret that he knows is true but doesn”t know the truthof.
Instead, he looks back at me, open curiosity and mischief bringing his features alight. ”Do you want me out here or in there with you?”
Trusting me to lead this is the best gift he could possibly give. He lets me decide if I want to face this alone or side by side. Even though I can see the nerves hiding behind his smile, scared of leaving me alone with two creatures that can sing someone into submission so easily, he allows me the complete freedom to do what I want.
”Wherever you”ll have the best vantage point.”I shrug. A part of me knows I should feel sick about this. This strange, flirtatious discussion of how we”re about to torture and kill two Syrens. It”s too vulgar and violent of a moment to feel so intimate, but venturing into this with Kairon and his morbid, wicked humor is so delicious. I can”t deny that, at this moment, I”ve never craved his touch more.
He smiles, the fire in his eyes heating. Again, he gestures me through the door, his hand on my lower back as I walk through. The Syrens” pleas turn into cries as they try to burrow their way into the wall behind them to escape us. The click of the cage door shutting drives them into hysteria, going as far as to try to push each other toward me.
The king chuckles. ”I don”t think I”ve ever been in a room where I wasn”t the person everyone was most afraid of.”
A smile fights its way onto my face, even through my trepidation.
Slowly, I walk toward the Syrenswith my hands up placatingly. They scream, making themselves as small as possible. ”It”s alright,”I tell them.”I”m not going to hurt you.”
”Don”t—”One sniffles. ”Don”t come any closer.”
I crouch, coming down to their level and trying to remain completely unintimidating. ”It”s okay,”I tellheragain. ”Can I check your wounds?”
She sniffles, trying to gain clarity through the fear. I reach out for her leg, and she flinches away from me. I barelymanage toget my fingertips to graze her shin, and that”s enough.
Terror floods me, tempered with a violent rage, confusion, anticipation, and even a little hope. It”s the hope that makes my heart sink. She still thinks there”s a chance she”s getting out of this. Even though they were part of a plot to kill me, looking at a life that”s soon to leave this world because of me is a raw, clawing feeling, rivulets of guilt tearing through me.
Pushing through my own concoction of feelings, I calm hers. The tears stop, and the fear and anger abate, leaving a semi-lucid, still very confused Syren before me. I look behind me at the king, his head tilted to the side, watching me with curious eyes.
”You”re okay,”I tell the Syren, and she nods.
The one behind her still claws to escape, pushing her friend away to get further from me.
”What”s your name?” I ask her.
”Veil,”she tells me, blinking repeatedly while searching for clarity.
I nod, sitting on the disgusting floor in front of her. ”Hi, Veil. I”m Elva.”
”You”re the girl,”she says. ”The girl who has to die.”
I grimace, the memories of that almost happening trying to fight their way into my mind and derail me from my current mission. ”Sorry to disappoint you.”I chuckle, not feeling the humor at all.
If I expected guilt or even the smallest dose of remorse from someone who is looking at the person they plotted to kill, I would be severely disappointed. Instead, her anger and frustration only grow. ”You are supposed to die,”she repeats emphatically. ”You have to die!”
Almost certain that she is about to attack me, I drain all the emotion from her, leaving a blank slate. She stares at me, blinking once, before looking at the king, then back at me.
”Why do I have to die?”I ask her.
She blinks again, staring vaguely into the distance. ”So I can have legs.”
Kairon groans behind me. ”That”s all they”ve told me. Kill the girl, wait for reinforcements, somehow get legs.”
”And Shan?”I ask him, not taking my eyes off Veil.
”Shan gave no reason at all. Remembered nothing.”
I hmm in thought. ”Well, this one remembers something. For some reason, she”s willing to let me die without a care in the world as long as she gets legs.”
”I just wanted legs.”Some niggling, hot emotion fills her.
Jealousy.”You already have legs?”I gesture to the admittedly torn-to-shred proof in front of us, and she wiggles her toes, wincing at the pain.
”But I want to keep them, control them.”
”Like the queen?”That hot emotion grows, and I let it overshadow all the other feelings plaguing her.
”No. Vanya,”she spits the Syren princess”s name. ”Vanya gets to keep her legs permanently.”
”Only Valta can walk on land freely,”the king comments behind me. ”Vanya shouldn”t have that power until she takes the throne.”
Veil grits her teeth. ”And yet, she does. They gave her legs, gave her freedom. I just want legs.”
”Shut up, Veil!”the other Syren shrieksfrombehind her. ”You”ll ruin everything.”
The other Syren jumps suddenly, trying to attack me.The second she”s within reach, my fingers graze hers, and she stops.
She looks at me, confused, before plopping down and shaking her head. ”No.”She tries to fight against me. ”No, you won”t control me. No, no, no.”She tries scratching at her head, her actions entirely at odds with the lack of emotion I”m allowing her to feel.
”Please calm down,”I beg, trying to soothe her with a dose of trust toward me and even a little fondness for good measure. ”Can you tell me your name?”
”Tia,” she answers, fingers twitching.
I nod, smiling softly. ”Tia, it”s nice to meet you.”
”They”re going to kill us,”she tells me, fear growing in her chest. ”They said if you touch us, we are useless, and they”ll kill us.”
I swallow against the lump growing in my throat.Whoever is behind thisnot onlyknows about my powersbut alsohow they work.”Who?”Kairon asks.
”I— I”m not sure. There”s a man and a woman. And they have... they have us. They have Vanya, but Vanya has them, too.”She blinks, eyes rolling into her head like she could find the answersin thereif she just looked hard enough.
”And what did you gain from being a part of this?”I ask.
”Legs.”
”What is with these Syrens and their fucking legs?”Kairon mutters, scoffing.
Fury fills Tia. ”You don”t understand! Living trapped under the surface is stifling. I wanted to see the world, feel the grass in the plains, breathe in the air.”
”While I understand your hunger for adventure,”sarcasm fills the king”s tone, ”was it really worth someone else”s life?”
”Yes.”Once again, not a single crumb of guilt bleeds from her. ”Hundreds of lives, even.”
My blood runs cold at her lack of conscience, unsure what hundreds she”s talking about. ”What do you mean?”
”Many, many more will die once you do,”she tells me, still so sure that I”ll be the one lying dead soon. ”Your death brings the greatest war any of us have ever seen. And when Oksangui falls, then and only then will our legs be permanent.”
”What else do you remember?”I ask, a hot and terrifying emotion filling me, begging for retribution.
”Tia,”Veil cuts in, and Tia”s annoyance at her begins to boil her blood. ”The man... the man, so handsome. And the woman, too. They”re both so beautiful. But... what do they look like?”
Tia blinks repeatedly, confused and furious at her lack of memories. ”I don”t know, shut up.”Tia is self-aware enough to know what control I have over her, fighting it all the while she”s dragging through giving us the information we need.
She slaps herself across the face again and again, the madness of not having control over herself taking hold. I”ve never pushed against someone this hard, usually only needing to exert a small amount of influence, along with the right words and smiles. I wonderfor a momentif this much resistance is beyond my capabilities and if I”ve broken her entirely by doing this.
After the umpteenth slap, she jumps at me again, her mind and emotions scattered. Her fingers wrap around my throat, the bloody ends of them slipping as she tries to grip me.
Faster than the king or Tia can react, I scream to Veil for help, forcing her body to fill with protectiveness and loyalty and using her dormant dislike for Tia by growing it into full-blown hatred.
Kairon takes a step forward before halting, his frozen visagejuston the edge of my peripheral vision. I can only imaginethe wayhis brows might be furrowed in confusion, wondering why he”s not the one I summoned to save me.
Veil grips Tia”s hair, pulling her off of me and tackling her to the floor. The Syrens screech, their voices sharp and dissonant as they fight. Tia tries to scratch at Veil”s face, but her fingernails are long gone, only smearing blood across it.
Tia screams at her to stop, trying to tell her that I”m controlling her and to wake up from the deception. Veil just shrieks, any manner of lucidity gone, hersingular motivationbeingthat she must protect me.
Kairon grips me underneath my arms, lifting me to stand and pulling me away from them.From somewhere inside me,a fury I”ve always ignored comes to the surface.My chest feels hot, and my fingers ache to join in their fight and bring them both immeasurable pain and suffering like they wanted for me. Like they orchestrated for me.
In front of us, the Syrens continue their fight, ripping chunks of bloodied hair from each other. Clearly, neither one of them has ever had to defend themselves on land, not even knowing how to throw a single punch or do anything besides grab and slap.
”Do you have any weapons on you?”I ask Kairon absentmindedly, captivated by the display of pathetic violence in front of me
Disbelief colors Kai”s tone. ”You want to give them weapons?”
”Only one,” I correct.
He stands motionless for a second, silently thinking. ”But she could turn on us at any moment.”
”She won”t,”I assure him. ”And if she does, you”ll take care of it. We”re not getting anything else that”s useful from them.”
From the corner of my eye, he disappears, the sounds of him exiting the cage not tearing the Syrens away from each other or my sight away from them.When he returns,he places a small, rusty dagger in my waiting palm.
I toss the dagger to the floor beside the Syrens, fueling Veil”s desperation and fury as I do. Tia spots it first, but it doesn”t matter. She”s pinned to the floor, Veil”s hand around her throat as she leans almost all of her weight on her. Either Veil will get the knife, or she”ll crush Tia”s larynx trying to keep her from it.
Veil”s line of sight follows Tias, and she frantically snatches up the dagger.
”Veil!”Tia screams. ”Veil, please, stop! Don”t you see? She”s doing this to you! You have to fight back.”
Veil looks up at me, and for only a split second I worry she might listen. But instead, she grips the sharp object in her hand, lifting it up above her head as Tia pleads with her to stop, fearandanger and sorrow flooding her brain.
As Veil brings the dagger down, I try to instill a calm acceptance in Tia, not wanting her last moments to be full of terror. It works to some extent, but facing death will scare anyone; no amount of power or comfort will be able to change that.
The dagger lands with a sickening squelch and thunk as it hits the floor beneath Tia”s chest.No one could survive a blow like that,andyet,I do nothing.I don”t ease up on Veil”s rage or her determination, letting her strike Tiaagain and again.
She strikes so fast, so viciously, that blood splatters from the wounds, hitting me across the face and soaking my hair. The sight before me makes me sick, and I have to hold back from heaving. But this is my doing, my violence, and if I look away now, I”m no better than the fucking cowards that sent them here to kill me while hiding in the shadows.
”Elva,”Kairon breaks my concentration, and Veil finally stops, throwing the dagger to the side and crawling off her friend.
I look up at him, a painting of red crimson dripping down his face and clothes.
”She”s gone, Elva,”he tells me. ”She”s not going to hurt you.”
I blink a few times. ”I know.”Does he believe this was only fueled by fear? While that might be part of it, I would be lying to both of us if I pretended I didn”t just want to inflict pain on her like they did to me.
Veil sobs, using her hands to try to wipe the blood from her arms and body, only managing to smear it around and make the mess worse. ”What have I done?”
A sick satisfaction fills me, thrilled to know that with this one death, I”ve caused suffering for both the living and the dead. ”You killed her.”I shrug.
”No,”she whimpers. ”I... I wouldn”t have. I couldn”t have. Syrens do not harm each other. It is the first law of our kind, the only one for which the punishment is death.”
”Perhaps we should send you home,”Kairon comments. ”Let them deal with you. I”m sure your queen will have some questions for you.”
Devastation floods Veil”s bloodstream. Looking at where she tossed the bloody weapon, guilt and resignation fill her, overshadowing anything else she might feel.
Seeing the same thing I do, Kairon picks up the dagger, throwing it out of the Syren”s reach through the bars. She sobs, a near-silent choking sound, as she throws herself to the floor, eyes open and staring into space. Her mind is a maelstrom of emotion. One I have no interest in partaking in any longer.I let go ofthe hold I”ve hadon her, though I wish I could remove myself from her feelings altogether.
My eyes wander to Kairon,justto find him already staring at me,fascinationand maybe even a littlefear within hisraised brows and slightly parted mouth.As his eyes meet mine, his expression changes slightly, and I worry that perhaps he”s mad at me.
Something fiery fills his gaze, and I honestly can”t tell if it”s fury or something even more dangerous. He has every right to be angry at me for hiding this from him. I wonder if he”s going to leave me here with my victims or if I”m going to be his prisoner now that he knows how much I”ve deceived him.
His eyes traverse my frame slowly, cataloging every drop of blood smeared across me, the heat and anger in his expression a deadly combination. With a heavy breath, he grits out, ”Upstairs. Now.”