CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
Blair
Then
I was running around like a crazy person in the few minutes before Scott arrived.
I hadn’t had much time to clean lately, and I knew Scott liked things perfectly neat.
I didn’t have to clean for him, but old habits died hard.
And I wanted him to see how well I was doing without him.
I didn’t care much about what I looked like.
I couldn’t win against Scarlett; he’d shown that in a hundred different way.
And now I didn’t even want to. I just pulled my hair into the normal messy bun and put on a fresh pair of yoga pants.
It had been difficult getting the kids together to go stay with Gam. They’d been understandably shaken up by Scott no longer living at home. It didn’t matter that he’d barely paid attention to them even when he was home. I’d taken longer than usual to leave once I’d gotten them inside.
I was glad they didn’t know he was coming over tonight.
I surveyed the room. It wasn’t spotless by any means, but it was better than it had been.
The doorbell rang, but it was too early to be Scott. I wondered who it was. I’d have to get rid of them. I didn’t need any witnesses around if Scott and I were going to end up in a fight.
I blinked when I opened the door to see Scott standing on the porch.
He looked extra good, and I wondered if he’d gone to any effort for my benefit.
He was wearing a suit, which was obviously overly formal, but he sure as hell looked good in it.
I felt a familiar warmth at my core. I swear my body felt Scott’s proximity and was instantly ready for sex. But that sure as hell wasn’t happening.
“These are for you,” he said, his eyes looking down at me almost shyly. He held out a large bouquet of Calla lilies. They were my favorite flower. Maybe he did pay attention to me after all.
I frowned to cover up my attraction to him. “Why didn’t you just use your key?”
He shrugged. “It felt weird, like I was invading your privacy.”
“Well, come in,” I said, noting the fancy bag that indicated he’d been to Palermo’s, my favorite Italian restaurant.
What the hell was going on? I was starting to get nervous. I figured it was something about his relationship with Scarlett, and I suddenly didn’t want to know whatever news he had for me.
We walked through the foyer and into the kitchen. I put the flowers in water and started pulling plates from the cabinet.
“Could we… talk first?”
I turned to look at him. There was a note of something in his tone that I’d never heard before. He seemed almost nervous.
“The food will get cold, though.”
He shook his head. “Angelo gave me reheating instructions. We can put it in the fridge until we’re ready.”
I was aghast. “Is it going to take that long?”
“I’m not entirely sure,” he said, dragging the sentence out as he tried to decide what to say.
My hand trembled when I put the food in the fridge. I was starting to get scared, sure that I didn’t want to hear whatever it was he had to say.
He went ahead of me into the family room and automatically sat in his favorite chair. I sat on the sofa opposite him. I wanted as much space between us as possible.
“You need to know something,” he blurted immediately once we’d gotten seated. I froze. His tone was so urgent.
“I figured that out,” I snarked.
I could tell he was really upset when he didn’t even acknowledge my sarcasm. He took a deep breath and said, “You were right about Scarlett.”
I wanted to laugh, because duh, but I held it together. I didn’t trust myself to say anything, so I just gave him a look that effectively delivered my lack of shock.
“Yes, um, well, she filed a lawsuit this week because I let her go a couple of weeks ago…”
“Wait. Hold up. I’m missing details here. What the hell are you talking about? You fired her?”
“I don’t want to lose you and the kids, Blair. I knew she made you uncomfortable, and I should’ve done it as soon as you told me. I just… well, I liked the attention she gave me.”
“Yeah. I was a witness to that.”
He winced. “I’m so sorry.”
“Just get back to the story.”
He ran his hands up and down his thighs. “I told her I was letting her go, and she didn’t take it well. I told her I’d give her a glowing recommendation and a generous severance package, but it didn’t help.”
I wanted to ask if the recommendation was for her job or how good she was in bed. I held myself back.
“Anyway, she… well, she came onto me. When I didn’t respond, she threw herself at me and tried to kiss me.
I pushed her back gently, but she was furious.
She screamed at me that I’d led her on and she deserved to be with me.
She went on and on, like a banshee.” His eyes were wide at the memory.
“I finally had to tell her that I was calling the police if she didn’t leave. ”
“And you did this because you finally decided to care that your relationship bothered me?”
“Yes. I mean, no. I mean,” he ran a hand through his hair, frustrated to not be able to get the words out just right.
“Take a beat. I’m not putting any pressure on you to hurry. Just take your time.” I’d said these words many times over the years we were together. I was used to waiting patiently while he got his thoughts together.
He closed his eyes and leaned his head back in his chair.
He took a couple of deep breaths. When he was ready, he opened his eyes and leaned forward, his elbows on his thighs.
“I should have cared about your feelings immediately. I’m so sorry.
If I had just done the right thing, none of this would’ve happened. ”
I gently got him back on track. “You said she filed a lawsuit.”
“Yes. She filed it on Monday, but it hasn’t gotten out until today.”
“What was the lawsuit for? Unjust termination?”
He shook his head and had trouble meeting my eyes. “Sexual harassment.”
“Oh.” I had hated the whole dynamic between Scott and Scarlett, but I knew it wasn’t one-sided.
In fact, it had always been clear that she was after Scott.
If anyone had been harassed, it would be him.
Not that I thought she’d had to twist his arm to get him to notice her or anything. He’d been an easy target.
Too easy, I thought glumly.
“I didn’t,” he held up his hands as if to prove he was innocent.
“I don’t think you sexually harassed her. I think everything was totally mutual.”
“I never touched her, Blair. Not only did I not sleep with her, I never so much as kissed the woman. I made it clear that I was never leaving my wife. She loved to talk about you, and I’m ashamed to admit that I bought into that, but she knew I would never leave you.”
“Or so you said.”
“What do you mean?” he paused, looking at me.
“Isn’t it obvious? You clearly preferred her company to mine.
Ours, I should say. She started working for you and within a few months you’d basically abandoned us.
I’m quite sure you were halfway out the door already.
That you were well on your way to having an ex-wife and then a second wife soon after. ”
He looked miserable. “That’s not true; I swear to you. I… I liked how she made me feel. You’re so independent. You hardly ever need me. But Scarlett? She seemed like she couldn’t do a damn thing without me, and then she made me feel like a king when I was able to help her out.”
“And you liking her attention had nothing to do with her looks, right?”
He looked guilty and scrubbed a hand over his face. “I did find her attractive. I’m not going to lie to you. But I never cheated on you. Not even close.”
“Did you want to?”
He hesitated before he said, “No.” He saw my face and knew that I was aware he’d just lied to me.
He sighed. “I mean, I’m a guy. I… imagined it.
I thought about it a few times. But Blair—I think you know you’re some sort of sexual siren for me.
I think you’re the most beautiful, hottest, sexiest woman I’ve ever known.
I honestly can’t imagine that sex would be better with anyone in the world than it is with you. ”
My lips parted in shock.
“I mean, my God. I think we’ve fucked in a closet or coat room of every event we’ve ever been at together.
” His eyes started going dark, and I knew exactly what he was thinking.
He would not be getting any sex out of me anytime soon.
Although it felt like I was punishing myself, too.
I imagined getting on my knees and sucking him until he screamed my name, and I almost groaned.
Then I felt horrible about myself. I was weak when it came to his man.
He studied my face, seeing that I was turned on, too. “Think how many times we did it in the library.”
Despite myself, I laughed. “True. Some of those librarians had to have seen us, don’t you think?”
He grinned. “They might’ve enjoyed it. You know, free porn.”
That made me laugh harder. “Can you imagine? God, we didn’t even have any of the young, cool librarians. We had the stereotypes. Though they were very nice,” I added, feeling guilty.
His smile eventually faded. “What I’m trying to say is that there’s no way she could ever come close to satisfying me like you do. I never wanted her Blair. Not really. I think I liked the idea of what she represented. Freedom. No strings, nothing holding me to her, no children, no obligations.”
I must’ve looked sad, because he asked me, “Wait, that’s a good thing, right? Why do you look upset?”
“Because I’m afraid that’s all there ever was between us. Sex. I’m not even sure we’re friends now. You’ve spent so little time with me over the past couple of years. Sometimes I think we barely even know each other.”