Chapter 38
THEN
Mid August
‘You’re home late,’ I said as Ryan hung his key on the hook by the door.
‘Yeah, Charlotte and I had some stuff to deal with.’
Charlotte. The mention of her name was like nails on a chalkboard. Grating and impossible to ignore.
‘I saved you some chicken pie—’
‘I ate with my parents,’ Ryan said, cutting me off.
‘And Charlotte?’ The question slipped out before I could stop it.
‘Yeah, she was there,’ he said, dropping onto the sofa beside me.
I gritted my teeth.
‘Don’t make a big deal of it.’
‘I didn’t say anything,’ I objected.
‘You didn’t have to. I can feel the anger radiating from you.’
‘That’s not fair.’
‘You’ve always had an issue with her.’
‘Because she’s always had an issue with me.’
He let out a weary sigh. ‘Charlotte’s not out to get you, Kirsty.’ He didn’t look at me when he said it.
I snorted. ‘No, it’s you she’s after. She always has been.’
Ryan shook his head. ‘Don’t do this, please.’
‘I thought you going back to the stables was so we could bring your parents round to the idea of us,’ I said, shifting to face him. ‘Make sure your dad was okay and our plans aren’t a shock for him.’
‘It is,’ Ryan agreed.
‘But they are never going to accept me as long as Charlotte keeps inserting herself into your life. Our life.’
‘Look, I know you were upset she joined us for Sunday dinner the other day—’
‘That was supposed to be about us, Ryan. A chance for your parents to get to know me. The real me. Away from the stables. Away from all their assumptions about me. But, with Charlotte there, Denise is never going to be able to see me any differently than she aways has…’ I sucked in a breath. ‘Inferior to Charlotte.’
Two Years Ago – Mid September
‘You abandoned us,’ Denise’s voice was loud and sharp as I stepped through the front door. ‘You left your father to handle everything alone, while you gallivanted on some beach with that girl.’
‘Her name is Kirsty,’ Ryan corrected flatly.
I peered around the kitchen doorway at him; a smile tugged at my lips as warmth flooded my body.
‘She’s a distraction,’ Denise said coldly. ‘We nearly lost your dad while you were chasing after her.’
Ryan’s jaw tightened. ‘That’s not fair.’
‘Was it fair your dad had a heart attack at forty-eight? That the man who’s done everything for this family for his whole life almost died and his own son wasn’t even here? Maybe if you had been, it might never have happened.’
Ryan gasped. ‘How can you say that?’
‘If it hadn’t been for her, you’d have come home more during the holidays. You’d have moved back as soon as you finished uni. You’d have been here where you were needed. With your dad.’
‘Kirsty didn’t stop me from coming home.’
‘She certainly didn’t encourage it, though, did she? Not that that’s surprising.’
‘What’s that supposed to mean?’
‘She said it herself, she’s not close to her own family,’ Denise said.
‘What does that have to do with anything?’ Ryan demanded.
‘You’re all she has, of course she’s desperate to keep you to herself.’
‘That’s ridiculous.’
‘Is it?’
‘I’m doing my best to keep everyone happy,’ Ryan said, drawing me back to the present.
‘I know, but—’ I clamped my mouth shut.
‘What?’
‘Sometimes it feels like you’re so focused on looking after the stables and your family that it doesn’t leave much room for us.’
Ryan’s body stiffened.
‘We said we’d go to the registry office when we got back from Malta,’ I said, shuffling closer to him. ‘To start the process so we can get married.’
He didn’t meet my eyes.
‘We could do that tomorrow.’
‘It’s not like we need to rush it,’ he said quietly. ‘We have enough going on right now.’
‘But if we were married, then—’
‘Then what?’
I shrugged. ‘Then your mum would have to accept that I’m part of your life. And so would Charlotte.’
Ryan rolled his eyes. ‘I’m not marrying you to prove something to everyone else.’
‘But it would finally just be us,’ I said, aware of the desperation in my voice but unable to stop it. ‘That’s what we wanted, isn’t it?’
‘Yes, but—’
‘But?’
‘Let’s just give it some time.’ He rubbed the back of his neck. ‘See if we’re compatible.’
I drew back, his words like fire scorching my heart.
Compatible.
We’d been together for years. University. Malta. Here. He’d proposed twice. And yet now he wanted to see if we were compatible?
My chest tightened.
What did that even mean any more?