Chapter 37
NOW
Late August
Thursday
Sending Ryan away had been one of the hardest things I’d ever done. But we couldn’t just slip back into how things had been.
Could we?
And yet, I couldn’t stop thinking about him.
I glanced at the phone on the passenger seat beside me. I’d lost count of how many times I’d picked it up and started to call him since he’d left. The half-written messages I’d deleted. And then, finally, when I’d plucked up the nerve to call him this morning, it had gone straight to voicemail.
Maybe it was for the best. This wasn’t a conversation to be had on the phone. I needed to see him. Not just because of last night – because of everything.
What I’d done. What I’d found.
The break-in. The sales agreements with my signature.
Atlas.
I should have told him last night. I should have showed him the documentation. Demanded answers.
But it hadn’t seemed the right time.
And then he’d said he missed me…
Everything had become a blur after that.
I tightened my grip on the steering wheel as I pulled into Blackwater Stables.
It probably wasn’t a sensible idea, coming here. I knew what Denise thought of me. She’d be furious to see me here.
Even more so when she realised there was a chance of me being back in her son’s life for the third time…
A small smile tugged at my lips at that thought.
I’d done everything I could to be helpful and amenable. And she’d thrown it all back in my face.
I no longer cared what she thought about it. With Charlotte out of the way, there was little she could do to stop Ryan and me being together.
If that’s what we wanted.
I let that thought settle.
Was it what we wanted?
What I wanted?
I slowed as I approached the house, my gaze locking on the police car parked outside.
Why were the police here?
Did they know I’d stolen the files?
Surely not. Ryan would have said something last night if they knew.
I pulled to a stop, the engine still running. Perhaps I should come back another time.
But, then, how would that look?
Would people think I’d seen the police car and fled? Would the police think that?
I shook my head. Why would they?
Charlotte had died in a riding accident. There would be procedures. Questions. She’d been riding one of the Blackwaters’ horses. Of course the police would need to come here. That was normal.
Wasn’t it?
I turned the key, stepped out of the car and automatically crossed the yard.
‘Hey, Kirsty,’ one of the yard staff greeted me as I neared the stables.
‘Hi, Paul.’ I smiled back.
‘Not seen you here for a while,’ he said, shoving a spade into the soil and unearthing the roots of a foxglove.
I glanced down at the small pile of plants he’d already dug out. ‘Just looking for Ryan. Is he around?’
He shook his head. ‘Think he’s up at the house, talking to the police again.’
‘Oh.’ I glanced over my shoulder back at the house, not sure what to do now.
‘I’m sure he wouldn’t mind if you stick around, if you want to wait for him?’
‘Okay, thanks,’ I replied hesitantly.
He was right, Ryan probably wouldn’t mind. But Denise?
I shook that thought away. I no longer care, I reminded myself.
I wandered into the stables. It felt strange to be back here. Memories of the other night flashed through my brain as my gaze fixed on the tack room window.
I moved along the aisle, the soft snorting and scraping of hooves no longer as intimidating as it once had been. Atlas poked his head out of his stall as I approached.
I flinched but didn’t step away. Instead, I lifted my hand tentatively. ‘Hey, remember me?’ I whispered softly. My fingertips brushed his neck.
Atlas didn’t move.
‘Do you like that?’ I asked, smiling slightly.
‘Kirsty?’
I spun round at Ryan’s voice behind me.
‘You were—’ Ryan’s gaze flicked back and forth from me to Atlas. ‘You were stroking him,’ he said hesitantly, as though he wasn’t sure he could quite believe what he’d seen.
‘I just…’ I shrugged, not sure how to explain my sudden friendliness towards his horse. ‘I just came by to check how you’re doing,’ I said quickly.
‘You mean, with the way we left things?’
I shifted my weight but didn’t reply. It was true. But it felt selfish to admit it.
‘Kirsty, what are you doing here?’ Denise’s voice sliced through the quiet stables.
I turned abruptly.
She stood by the entrance, two uniformed police officers just behind her, one male and one female.
‘I just came to—’
‘She came to see me,’ Ryan said quickly, as he stepped close and took my hand.
I stared at him, stunned. It was one thing to do so in private where we were still trying to figure out what it meant. But here? In front of Denise? In front of the police?
‘Kirsty Palmer?’ the male police officer asked.
I turned back to face him. ‘Yes.’ My voice felt distant. Weak.
He knew my name.
How?
Why?
‘Good timing, your name has just come up.’
‘It has?’ My gaze shifted to Denise. What had she said about me?
‘We understand you saw Charlotte yesterday morning?’
I nodded. There was no point denying it. But how had Denise known about that?
‘We have a few questions,’ the officer continued. ‘If there’s somewhere we can talk?’
‘You can use the office,’ Ryan offered helpfully. His fingers loosened their grip and his hand slipped from mine.
As hesitant and uncomfortable as it had felt when he’d reached for me, the absence of his hand now felt worse. I felt worse.
‘Kirsty knows the way,’ he added when I didn’t move.
‘Right,’ I said, turning to lead the officers towards the office.
Spook snorted as I walked past and I sidestepped away from him. I might be less fearful of Atlas now, but Spook would always intimidate me.
‘I’m PC Grove and this is PC Day,’ the male police officer said as we crowded into the small office.
My breathing sounded heavy, even to my own ears. What if they knew about the last time I’d been in here? Sneaking around in the middle of the night, stealing files.
What was the punishment for breaking and entering?
Though technically I hadn’t broken in…
‘You were one of the last people to see Charlotte Lewis yesterday,’ PC Grove said, gesturing for me to take a seat at the desk, while he and his colleague lingered by the door, blocking the exit.
‘I was? I mean, I saw her, but—’
I clamped my mouth shut.
Why was I so nervous?
‘Was that normal?’
I blinked.
‘For you and Charlotte to meet?’
I shook my head. ‘Not really.’
PC Day nodded slightly. ‘We understand that you and Charlotte weren’t close. In fact, by all accounts, it seems there was a lot of animosity between you…’
She let her statement hang.
‘Charlotte was protective of the stables, and her place in it,’ I replied cautiously.
‘And you were a threat to that?’
A threat. The word tore through me. Is that what they thought I was to her? Surely that wasn’t good.
‘I was an outsider,’ I said calmly. ‘I grew up in a city. I didn’t know anything about horses. That didn’t sit well with Charlotte. She didn’t think I belonged here.’
‘But you were dating the Blackwaters’ son, Ryan?’
I nodded.
‘Until he left you last week.’ PC Grove paused. ‘For Charlotte.’
I clasped my hands together in my lap.
Charlotte had been thrown. That’s what Ryan said. It was an accident. Unexpected. Tragic. But an accident.
My stomach tightened. So why were they questioning me?
‘Miss Palmer?’
‘Yes, that’s right.’
‘So, it’s fair to say you had a grievance with Charlotte?’
‘We had a mutual dislike of one another, yes.’
My gaze shifted to the computer beside me. The sales agreements with my signature flashed through my head. What if the police found them?
I could tell them.
I should tell them.
But would they believe I had nothing to do with them?
How could I explain how I knew about them, without incriminating myself further?
‘And now that she’s dead—’ PC Grove glanced back towards the door ‘—you and Ryan are back together?’
‘No,’ I said quickly.
Too quickly.
‘He came to see me last night. He was shaken up by what had happened. And—’
I hesitated.
Was I telling them too much?
‘And…?’ PC Day said.
‘He said he missed me.’ I shrugged helplessly.
Even now it felt strange.
The way he’d left me.
The way he’d shut me out.
And then the way he’d come back.
‘And how did you feel about that?’
I let out a deep breath. ‘It was unexpected. And to be honest, confusing.’
‘But you didn’t seem confused when we entered the stables. The two of you looked very close.’
‘I came to talk to him, to figure out what was going on, if this is really something he wants. Something I want. I wasn’t expecting him to…’ I stared at my hand, flexing my fingers, recalling the feel of his touch.
‘But with Charlotte gone, there’s no reason for the two of you not to be together any more.’
‘It wasn’t just Charlotte that came between us,’ I said flatly. ‘Her death doesn’t miraculously solve all of our problems.’
‘But it solves some of them?’
I shifted uncomfortably. ‘I don’t understand why you are asking me these questions.’
‘We’re building a timeline,’ PC Grove said. ‘Trying to understand Charlotte’s movements. Her state of mind.’
‘Her state of mind?’ I blinked. ‘What would that have to do with an accident?’
‘Do you have any idea why Charlotte would have been riding at Ballard Down?’
‘Ballard Down?’ I repeated. ‘I thought she rode closer to the stables.’
‘Yes, that did seem to be her usual pattern. It’s intriguing why she would suddenly vary her route.’
I nodded.
It was.
It was also intriguing that Ryan hadn’t mentioned it last night.
No wonder they’d had difficulty finding her when she hadn’t returned. She wasn’t riding where anyone would expect her to be.
But why?
‘We’ll be in touch if we have any further questions,’ PC Grove said. ‘It’s just procedure,’ he added, when I looked surprised.
But something about the way his gaze lingered on me a little too long told me this was more than just procedure.
Something wasn’t right.