14. Kiera
FOURTEEN
KIERA
“ I really hate you,” I snipped at Nyx from where I sat on Jaxus’ back.
“Oh, relax, will you? You’re only sitting there.” Nyx rolled his eyes from the safety of the ground several feet below.
“That’s what he said last time,” I huffed.
“We’re inside. I can’t even spread my wings,” Jaxus added to the conversation through mind speak.
“He might be able to break out or something. I don’t know what you dragons are capable of!”
“You dragons?” Jaxus parroted back, sounding offended, but I ignored him.
“Where is he going to fly in a training room?” Nyx said, repeating the sentiment he had not heard his friend express. “We are in a stone palace, levels down. If you think a dragon can?—”
“Ugh, you two are so annoying,” I grumbled, cutting him off.
Nyx laughed and Jaxus huffed out a curl of smoke in amusement.
We had come to one of the larger practice rooms. It was large enough to accommodate Jaxus in his shifted form but not large enough for him to perform any heroics this time. If he tried to take off here, his wings would meet wall and we wouldn’t make it off the ground. The only reason I had agreed to this madness was because it was mildly safer, but I still wasn’t convinced they didn’t have some antics up their sleeves.
That, and it was late at night and we’d been in the Flaming Pegasus earlier. Ale had been imbibed and I was just loose enough to agree to try this again. And with an audience, no less.
Nyx had wheeled in some kind of mounting platform they used for children, which was insulting enough. But the real humiliation was coming from the inebriated spectators’ gallery. Zaria and Luka were shouting encouragement from their position against the wall while they snacked on food they grabbed from the dining hall on the way here like this was a spectator sport.
“If you don’t want to give it a go, I think Jaxus should take me up!” Luka called.
Zaria smacked his chest. “Let her focus!”
“Focus on what? She’s on the ground,” Luka muttered, swaying from drink. “I bet ryding would be a blast. Either way, a dragon would let me.” He wore a smirk that made Zaria roll her eyes. “I haven’t conquered a dragon yet. Let me add that to the list.”
Zaria glared at him. “Quiet you.”
“Is Jaxus not available?” Luka asked.
Zaria smacked him again.
I could use a snack to soak up all the ale but apparently I was already a vomit risk, and with alcohol in my system too, Jaxus had put his oversized foot down and said no food until I dismounted .
I peered down at the ground and regretted it immediately. Why did dragons have to be so big, anyway? They could fly and breathe fire. It’s not like they need the brute strength and size the Goddess gave them. They have the means to escape and evade and burn everything to the ground. The bulk is simply unnecessary.
Big, smelly show-offs! I thought to myself, causing an eruption of giggles to spill from me.
“Something funny up there?” Nyx asked.
“Want to share with the group?” Jaxus challenged mind to mind.
“Goddess save me!” I cried. “It’s bad enough I have to put up with you both separately, but now I have one in my mind and the other in my ear, talking in tandem. I can’t. Is there a point to this exercise other than to send me mad?”
“The point,” Nyx stated with authority, although I almost thought I detected a slur. “Is conditioning. We need you relaxed, hence the drink, and accustomed to sitting up there before we can move on to flight.”
I tensed, and Jaxus shifted in objection.
“He can feel your tension. It causes his to spike. It’s a bond reflex, if you like. You have to relax,” Nyx coached.
“Well, you mentioned flying. Of course I’m tense now! What did you expect?”
“I’ve honestly never seen this side of you before, Kiera. You grew up surrounded by dragons. What in all the kingdoms made you this afraid?”
I went from tense to rigid in a blink. Jaxus took three steps back, jostling me in the process, and I gripped his haunches in terror.
“Sorry,” he soothed in my head. “It’s a reflex, like Nyx said. Your fear is calling for a response from your bonded. I’m steady now. You can relax.”
“It’s being bonded—and all that comes with it—that is causing my fear!” I hissed back. “Maybe we could reach an understanding? You go about your life and I’ll go about mine, and then none of my fears will make you feel any kind of way. Everyone wins.”
“You’ll have to make that kind of bargain with the Goddess herself, I’m afraid. I have no control over how she has entangled us.”
“I really don’t want to fly,” I moaned aloud, sighing heavily.
“You will,” Nyx and Zaria chorused, exchanging some looks when they realized they were being cute.
Jaxus growled, the sound vibrating right through me.
“Sorry, mate,” Nyx laughed. “She needs to know.”
“Know what?” I demanded.
Nyx and Jaxus stayed locked in some silent stare-off, not giving me an answer. Then Zaria got to her feet and swayed over to Nyx.
“That you will want to fly soon,” she sing-songed.
“Rubbish!”
“It’s true. You’ll want to and then before you know it, you need to.” She sighed wistfully. “There is nothing like flying with your mate—or your bonded, in your case. Trust me. Once you get over this nonsense, you’ll be up there every chance you get.”
“Doubtful,” I muttered.
Zaria hiccuped and Nyx put an arm around her, half steadying her, half indulging his need to touch her all the damned time.
I groaned. “Are we done here, or do I have to sit up here and watch you canoodle all night?”
“Depends,” Nyx replied. “How do you feel? And be honest with yourself.”
I breathed in deeply, centering myself. Honestly, I felt okay. Not wonderful. But semi-relaxed, although I’m sure the drinking had something to do with that. If I focused on how far from the floor I was, it didn’t fill me with the warm fuzzies, but objectively, I knew I was in safe hands. Jaxus wouldn’t let harm come to me. I felt that in my soul. The bond tightened whenever I imagined what could happen if we flew, and I knew it would protect me. He would protect me.
And knowing that, actually made me feel somewhat safe up here, even though my body wanted to revolt and jump down as soon as possible.
“Well?”
“It’s okay?”
“Just okay?”
“I haven’t passed out or thrown up, Nyx. What more do you want from me?” I asked, annoyed.
“I guess that will do for now. Just promise me something—no, promise Jaxus something.”
“What’s that?”
“Promise him that you won’t fight the natural urge of your bond. If you feel the desire to fly—no matter how much you want to resist it—tell him and he will help you get there.”
I stared at him. Intellectually, I knew the bond did create a drive to fly together. It was the whole point of the connection. But I was still skeptical that such a desire could override something so deep-rooted as this fear.
“Kiera,” Nyx snapped me out of my thoughts.
“Hmm?”
He folded his arms over his broad chest, waiting for my answer.
“Fine.” I didn’t believe it would happen for one moment, so I could agree for now.
“Maybe she needs to ride him the other way before she’ll feel comfortable,” Luka said under his breath.
“Luka!” Nyx scolded.
“It’s a valid idea!” Luka shot back, clearly drunk enough to not mind standing up to Nyx.
Come to think of it—heat warmed me through and I pushed the thoughts out of my head before the dragons in the room knew what I was thinking about.