14. The Beach
14
THE BEACH
S and. It was under my fingers, behind my legs, squishing around the heels of my feet. I was lying supine on a whole lot of sand.
The sun was blaring brightly this time. I found it hard to open my eyes. Lifting my hand to provide myself with some shade, I squinted my eyes open and glanced around the beach. The waves were flowing in and out steadily, seagulls were calling above me, and heat mixed with the slight chill in the breeze coated my flesh with a pleasant caress.
Groggy, I sat up with a groan, expecting to find more people this morning than I had the other night. But it was just me again.
I think it was a different abandoned beach, too. When I looked behind me, there was no row of cottages, just more beach until the sand hit a guardrail with a parking lot behind that.
You re back.
I whirled around with a gasp.
Hayes, I said, recognizing the boy. He was still in his swimming trunks sans shirt. In the daylight, his blond hair looked extra pale, and his facial features were strangely familiar.
You sure seem awfully determined to die lately, he said, tipping his face as if amused by me.
I… I shook my head, not sure what to reply except, I don t mean to.
Well… I guess you should go back, then.
I glanced behind me at the empty parking lot, only to return my attention to the boy. How?
Just breathe, he said with a shrug.
I blinked at him, unimpressed by his advice. If this kid was supposed to be my spirit guide, I think I was screwed.
Do you…? I bit my lip, afraid to ask. Do you know where my sister is?
He just looked at me for a moment as if he had no idea what I was talking about, so I licked my dry lips and tried to explain, Her name s?—
Kinsey, he said simply. Yeah, she s here. She s getting acquainted with your mom right now.
Tears filled my eyes, and I started to nod, feeling hopeful. So… Can I see her? Can I see them both?
Hayes shook his head and took a step back. Only if you plan to stay, he told me. And you shouldn t. You should go back. You can still go back.
But… I blinked, not understanding. How is it okay for me to talk to you and not them? Are you not dead as well?
Oh, I am, he said matter-of-factly. But I m a guide, you see.
Wow, did I call that or what?
I help newcomers cross over. That way, I get to sneak back and forth and check in on my family any time I want, to make sure they re doing okay. And… You re making my brother sad right now. So you should go back. He doesn t want you to die yet.
I squinted at him. Your brother ? Was this the same brother he d mentioned the other night?
Foster, he told me. He s trying not to cry. He s worried about you.
You—you re Foster s brother? The one who died when he was…?
Nine, Hayes told me simply. I died on his ninth birthday.
On his…? Tears filled my eyes. Oh. I—I didn t know. I m sorry.
Hayes sighed, then smiled encouragingly at me. Hey, when you see him, can you thank him for me?
Thank him? I repeated with a choked, hoarse voice, not understanding.
Hayes bobbed his head and grinned. Yeah, thank him. He was the only one who could see me while I was dying, and he kept me company and laughed and made jokes with me as he built his sandcastle. I wasn t scared at all because of him. So could you tell him thank you for me? For being there through the scariest, last moments of my life. I really needed that.
Okay. I wiped at my wet eyes so I could see through the flood, and I nodded at the boy. I ll tell him, I promised.
Hayes inclined his head gratefully. And Kinsey says hi. So does your mom. But they don t think you should stay yet either. They think your captain would be alone for too long if you stayed now.
I sobbed out a painful shudder but then nodded. Okay. I ll go back. Can you tell her I love her, though, and I miss her? I miss them both. So much.
He smiled. I will. Now close your eyes, and I ll send you back to Foster.
I did, bowing my face and squeezing my lashes shut as hard as I could before I asked, How long should I keep them shut?
Near me, I heard Hayes whisper, Oh, you can open them now.