19. Foster
19
FOSTER
W hen we made it up to the fourth floor, Darlene was working and informed me, We had to put her into a medically induced coma. After the number of times she went into cardiac arrest, her brain was beginning to swell to the point that her doctor decided to give it a little rest to heal more easily. But we ll reassess her again in three days to see if we can take her out of it then.
I swallowed and looked in at Raina s body. How—what do you even do to induce a coma?
The doctor administered some anesthesia, I was told.
I nodded. Which would make her drowsier. Okay, that made sense. It would explain why Raina felt so tired all of a sudden. I started to relax until Darlene squinted at me.
She was already unconscious, hon. How can you get drowsier when you re already unconscious?
Crap. I probably shouldn t have said that aloud. With a tight smile, I agreed, Right. Sorry.
I stayed another half hour, and Raina tried a handful of ways to get back into her body, none of which worked. Then, I stood and sent her a regretful wince. Sorry, but visiting hours are almost up.
She sighed dismally but nodded. Okay, let s go. And we started home.
I stepped into the bathroom as soon as we arrived to take a shower, and Raina dragged her feet toward my bed to plop down in exhaustion. Pausing in the doorway, I watched her, wondering how she didn t just fall right through the mattress. Or why sometimes she could lean against a wall but then could float through it at other times.
But I figured I d probably never truly understand, so I shook my head and took my shower.
When I exited, she was passed out cold on top of the mattress. I finished getting ready for bed and then eased down next to her, focusing on her face as I did.
When her eyelids fluttered open, I winced. Sorry. I didn t mean to wake you.
It s fine, she slurred sleepily. Do you want me to leave?
You re okay, I assured. It s not like you could kick or elbow me.
She gave me a tired smile and closed her eyes. But I could snore.
I chuckled. Then I ll just snore louder.
With a snicker, she answered, Sweet, and then she fell silent.
I watched her for another few seconds, thinking I kind of liked having her here. The company was nice.
With her eyes still shut, she murmured, You re staring.
Sorry. Flushing, I cleared my throat.
It s okay, she assured, drowsily reopening her eyes. Was there something you wanted?
No. I shook my head. I was just hoping you were okay. Are you feeling okay?
She nodded. Sure. There s no pain. No hunger. No hot or cold. Not much of anything. It s different and weird, but I m okay.
Good.
Her eyes closed again, and I kept watching her.
I really liked her hair, I decided. Auburn was definitely my new favorite color. And those curls. Sometimes they just waved, sometimes there was a whole corkscrew. It was as if every lock did its own thing. It was fascinating as hell.
Have you forgiven me yet for not telling you about your sister? I asked.
Her hazel-gray eyes opened again, and she sent me a sad smile. I suppose. Being around you kind of makes me forget to be sad, so it—ooh! Hey. Speaking of Kins, I never got a chance to tell you about my dream. I saw her last night. And your brother too.
Hayes? I asked in surprise.
She nodded.
After she explained Hayes s job of guiding spirits and his theory about the pathway in her head and getting to see her sister and meet her mom, I sighed. So he s still seven when you see him? When Raina nodded, I shook my head. Weird. For some reason, whenever I think of him, I picture him at the age he should be now. Almost nineteen and a freshman in college. I see him as this perfect mix between me and Reed.
I think he would ve been the shortest of the three brothers, Raina played along. But maybe the huskiest too.
A smile spread across my lips as I admitted, He did like his sweets.
Raina chuckled before falling serious. I wonder how I ll continue to think of Kinsey.
I don t know, I murmured quietly.
She grew pensive, lost in her own thoughts before focusing on me again. So you re back to classes again tomorrow, right?
I nodded. Yeah. Think you ll be up for a full day of walking around campus with me?
She sighed. It s going to be so weird not going to my own classes.
Feeling bad for her, I offered, I could go to a few of yours and sit in so you can hear the lecture if you want?
Absolutely not, she ordered sternly. Your life s already been altered enough to make room for me. You re not missing any of your own classes.
What major are you, anyway? I asked, curious to know more about her.
Early childhood education, she answered. I think I d like to teach either second or third grade. Somewhere in that age range.
I nodded. She definitely had a sweet elementary teacher vibe about her. And you re a junior?
Sophomore, she said. I came in just when you were rising to fame with your football career, which is probably why my crush is so strong.
She rolled her eyes at herself, and I smiled, wishing I could reach out and just touch her hair.
I m sorry I didn t agree to meet you when Oaklynn first suggested it. I just… With a shudder, I admitted, Setups freak me out.
No, I get it, she agreed. I ve never had any luck with blind dates either. Jaylani set me up with this guy my freshman year, and oh my God. Groaning, she rolled her eyes. It was so awful. I feigned a stomachache halfway through dinner and tossed some cash at him to pay for my half of the meal before booking it out of there.
I lifted my eyebrows. Wow.
You probably know him too. With a shudder of revulsion, she added, He writes most of the sports articles in the school paper.
My eyes bugged. Oh God. Please don t say Connor Resson.
When she groaned through a guilty wince, I threw my head back and laughed, only to slap my hand over my mouth because I laughed way too loudly. Shit. I hope I didn t wake the whole damn house.
Raina snickered at my reaction.
Dropping my fingers, I told her, I hate that guy so much. I swear, he baits me every time he interviews me as if he wants me to say something he can crucify me with.
Probably. He s incredibly full of himself; he can t handle anyone else being more popular than he is. From the moment I met him at the restaurant, all he did was talk about how wonderful he was and how awful everyone else was. And the way he treated the waitress…
When she made a disgusted face and shook her head, I grinned. I am so glad I m not the only one who can t stand him. All the other guys on the team suck up to him, and it drives me crazy.
Raina wrinkled her nose. Bleh. Why?
I shrugged. I guess they think it ll get them mentioned in the paper more. I don t know.
Well, you don t seem to have that problem; you get mentioned all the time.
With a groan, I muttered, Don t remind me. I m not a fan of that much attention. It s freaking embarrassing.
Embarrassing? she squawked in surprise. How could you not like all the love?
The love is fine, I assured her. But having that many people watch every little thing you do can get suffocating. Sometimes, I just want a little anonymity, space to breathe, you know. I get tired of having to explain my actions every time someone asks why I did something.
Squinting at me, she murmured, Okay, yeah. I guess that part could get pretty taxing. Tipping her face to the side, she watched me for another second before saying, Do you even like football?
Sputtering out a laugh, I shook my head over such an absurd question. Of course, I like football.
But do you, like, love it, love it? It s just… She shrugged. You haven t done anything football-y since I ve been stuck with you.
I chuckled. Football-y?
She rolled her eyes. You know what I mean.
Yeah, I murmured before sighing. I do. But to be fair, the season just ended. I m on a much needed break at the moment.
Because you re tired of it and don t like it? she guessed.
Laughing again, I shook my head. No. I like football. I like the rush I get when I m out on the field; I like the strategy, planning, and trying to outsmart and outperform the other team. I love how everything can narrow down to the next big play. I like my teammates and practicing with them. And I love watching all our hard work and practice come together to win games. I like the sport.
Mm-hmm, she murmured as if she didn t buy that. So why does it sound as if there s a but coming?
I smiled and took a turn to roll my eyes at her. Okay, maybe you were right that it s not my entire life. The scholarship it provides is probably more important to me than whether I play another game or not. I don t know how I d pay for college without it. So I put up with all the interviews and photo shoots, which…ugh. Tipping my head back in misery, I groaned. That reminds me; I have one of those tomorrow afternoon before my last class of the day.
Seriously? She brightened, suddenly not appearing tired at all. You have a photo shoot tomorrow? I get to watch you at a photo shoot? Are you going to take your shirt off?
For some reason, I couldn t seem to stop laughing tonight. But everything she said entertained me. You ve seen me shirtless, I reminded her, still shaking my head over how adorable she was.
Only for, like, two seconds, she argued.
Well, sorry, but they ve never had me take it off before, so I m going to say, no, I m probably not going to go shirtless at the photo shoot.
Raina slumped in disappointment. They have no idea how to really sell football then.
After another soft chuckle, I sighed out a breath and watched her face for a moment before whispering, Thank you.
She sent me a clueless frown. For what?
You made me forget to be so sad today too.
That s right, she admitted. You kind of woke up getting evicted from your own home, didn t you? I mean, it s like a sloth-speed eviction. From the timeline they gave, some of your younger siblings might move out before you do. She shook her head and gave me a sympathetic look. But I never would ve guessed that you ve always been working through those issues. You seem so happy and comfortable with yourself during your interviews. Are you really filled with that much guilt under it all?
I…don t know, I admitted with a rueful shrug. To be fair, I m usually being interviewed because something awesome just happened, like we won a game. So yeah, I probably am riding a high and pretty happy at those times. But—I mean, I don t think I m depressed or anything. The guilty, ashamed stuff has become such a normal part of my everyday life that I don t even really notice it anymore. Sure, it s the driving force behind almost everything I do, but it doesn t drag me down or anything like that. I just carry it along with me wherever I go. You know?
Raina watched me quietly for a second before she nodded. I think I do know. Though I must admit, I think you weather it like a boss.
With a disbelieving snort, I said, Well, I m glad someone thinks so.
You do, she assured. You re pretty amazing all the way around. You re turning out to be a lot different from what I originally thought when I first saw you on that campus billboard, but I think this version of you is so much better.
My chest heated with the praise. I d had a lot of girls try to get with me because I was the Haverick football quarterback. But it hit so much harder when someone liked me because I was simply Foster.
The modest side of me had to duck away from the praise though. Shaking my head, I answered, Stick around a minute, then, Spirit Girl. You ll learn all my flaws soon enough.
She rolled her eyes before retorting, Since I actually am stuck with you for the foreseeable future, game on, Mr. Football.
I chuckled. Good night, Raina.
Night, Foster, she murmured back. I ll see you in the morning.
You better, I threatened. For the next three days at least, while they have you induced in that coma, you better not think about going anywhere else. Because the alternative meant she d died, and I really didn t want her to die.
I ll see what I can do, she assured.
* * *
When my alarm went off the next morning, Raina groaned audibly. Oh my God. Make it stop.
I barked out an amused laugh and reached over to silence the persistent sound, glad to know she d made it through the night. Rise and shine, Spirit Girl. School s back in session.
Mmph, she mumbled, not sounding like a morning person today.
Still drowsy? I asked, rolling over to face her. Her curls were everywhere, and I wanted to plow my fingers into them so badly. It s probably all the anesthesia.
She opened one eye to scowl. You sound way too chipper to be preparing for a whole new semester.
I shrugged and whipped off the blanket before crawling out of bed. Only because I m taking this epidemiology lab, and I m kind of geeking out about it. I like studying things under a microscope.
Her nose wrinkled as she sat upright to watch me pull clothes from my dresser. Really? That sounds awful to me.
Or like puzzle pieces and a huge mystery to solve, I countered. I mean, what if I accidentally figure out how to cure cancer or something? How does that not sound exciting to you?
She shrugged and mumbled, Meh.
Figuring she was too tired to give a better answer, I grinned at her and shook my head. Be out in a minute. Don t leave without me.
She scoffed, muttering, Funny, as I shut the door.
Twenty minutes later, I was sliding on my shoes and ready to go. Hefting my book bag onto my shoulders, I told her, Oh, and we ll have company in the truck for a while. Since Dad returned to work again, I ll have to take Brey to school. She s in the fifth grade.
Still wearing a pair of hot pink, silky pajamas and pastel pink fuzzy slippers, Raina yawned and scratched her mussed hair. But not the rest of them? she asked as I paused at the door before pulling it open.
Nope, I answered, a little loath to enter the rest of the house because, outside this room, I d have to pretend she wasn t there. Amy s a sophomore and can drive herself. Then Mom will drop Reed off at the middle school on her way to take Little to preschool.
So let me get this straight. Your family has one kid in college, one in high school, one in middle school, one in grade school, and one in preschool? Boy, did y all time that just right.
I laughed. Or all wrong, as Mom puts it. You ready for this?
Straightening her back, Raina sent me a salute. Aye aye, Captain.
She changed clothes in the blink of an eye, wearing shorty shorts that showed off way too much of her shapely thighs and a snug, lime-green shirt that had a little v ed slit to show off some amazing cleavage. Heeled sandals finished the look with pure sexiness.
I lifted my brows, swallowing thickly.
And Raina frowned in confusion. What s wrong?
Nothing, I rasped, shaking it off. Let s do this.
Pulling the door open, I stepped into the hall to see Brey pounding on the bathroom door, demanding that Amy hurry up, and I had to pull up short as Reed almost ran into me when he exited his room with his nose stuck in a book.
Oh, sorry, Fos. He glanced over the top of the Kindle to send me a sheepish grin. Didn t see you there.
No worries. I ruffled his hair and splayed out a hand to let him go ahead of me.
As he did, Brey spun around to nail me with a look. Foster, can I?—
Yes, I told her before she could finish the question. I hitched my head toward my bedroom. You can use my bathroom.
Oh, thank God. As she streaked past me, Little appeared at the end of the hallway and shouted my name.
Foster!
Hey, hey, kiddo. Good morning. As she ran toward me, I bent down to swoop her up into my arms. You ready to go back to school today?
Uh-huh. Nodding, she set her hand on my shoulder and then tipped her face in to rest her brow against my temple as I carried her toward the kitchen. I ve decided I m going to feed Thomas today.
I blinked at first, not catching on, before I remembered who Thomas might be. Is that the class turtle or fish?
Turtle, she said. I was scared before. But I m not scared now. Cause I m older today.
Oh my God, she is just too cute, Raina cooed from behind me. I want a roomful of students just like her.
Ignoring her, I nudged my temple affectionately against my little sister s and teased, Older and wiser, huh?
You betcha. Then she blinked in confusion. What does wiser mean?
I was explaining the definition as we entered the kitchen, where my mother was filling three lunch boxes and preparing breakfast at the same time.
Morning, I greeted as she glanced over, tossing a sandwich into a lunch box before immediately pouring milk into a bowl of cereal.
Morning, sweets, she told me, carrying the cereal over as I tucked Little into her booster chair next to where Reed had fallen into a seat and was still engrossed in his story. Mom set the cereal in front of Little before swiping a loving hand over her hair. Then she kissed the crown of Reed s head before turning to slap her lips against my cheek.
Dad already gone? I guessed as I glanced around.
Yep. He had to head out at four this morning.
Bleh. I shuddered and headed toward the refrigerator so I could pull out my morning juice. As I twisted the cap off, I turned back to ask, So what do you need help with?
Actually, I think I have the food ready, Mom answered as she finished the lunches and zipped them closed. But, oh, can you take Kacey to school today too?
Straightening in surprise, I frowned at my mom. Kacey?
Who s Kacey? Raina asked, wandering over to check out the available breakfast food sitting on the counter.
Brey s best friend, I answered without thinking.
My mom shot me a funny look before slowly saying, Yes. That Kacey. Her mother has an appointment this morning and asked if we could take her.
I nodded, even as everything inside me tightened at the mention of Mrs. Crowder. Sure. Do we need to pick her up or?—
Nope, Mom began to fill bottles with water. Emma will drop her off here pretty soon.
Oh. Oh no. Swallowing in dread, I glanced toward Raina.
Paying no attention to the conversation between me and my mother, she pointed at the blueberry muffins. Are you still not going to eat one of these? Come on, Foster. They look so good. I can t handle how everyone just ignores them.
I gritted my teeth to keep myself from responding as Amy swept into the kitchen. Mom, can I have some money to stop for a macchiato on the way to school?
I m sorry, baby, I m fresh out of cash this morning. Scooping up one of the lunch boxes, Mom handed it over. But here s this for you.
Taking the lunch, Amy turned to me next. Foster… she begged.
Sighing, I dug into my back pocket. Let me see what I have.
When the only bill I could find was a ten, Amy plucked it from my hand readily.
This is perfect. Thank you. You re the best. Then she turned away to head out the back door, pausing only briefly to slap a kiss on Mom s cheek as she passed by. See ya.
Scowling, Mom set her hands on her hips and arched an eyebrow at me. Foster, I thought we just talked about this.
What? I defended. I still have seven months.
Seven months to find a new place to live, not to keep chipping in with?—
A knock on the back door cut her off before she could really get going.
Yoo-hoo, a familiar voice called as Kacey s mom popped her head into the kitchen.
My muscles tightened in dread, and I immediately spun to face the other way. Raina looked up at me in surprise and furrowed her brow as my face heated.
I took a big drink of my juice, hoping it would cool me off and keep my cheeks from turning scarlet.
When Kacey darted past me, calling Brey s name as she rushed from the kitchen, Raina stepped close, beginning to look concerned.
What s wrong?
Behind me, Emma greeted Mom, her voice making me flinch. Thanks again for getting Kacey to school for me, Dahlia. It s just been one of those mornings.
Gnashing my teeth, I wondered why she d bothered to come inside at all. Most of the time, she just stopped the car at the curb, and Kacey ran in on her own.
It s no problem, Mom was telling her. Though Foster s driving the girls, not me, since it s on his way to campus.
Oh. Emma s voice was filled with surprise, and I grimaced one last time before turning to face her.
She was bouncing her son, Noah, on her hip, and was decked out in a shirt way too tight for the size of her breasts.
Thanks, Fos, she told me with a sweet smile before running her gaze over my T-shirt and jeans.
Yep, I answered with a polite nod as I rested my back against the kitchen cabinet, wishing I could sink right through them and disappear from this moment forever. All the while, I guzzled my juice, trying to finish the bottle as quickly as possible.
Next to me, Raina stepped close, her eyes widening and mouth dropping open as she glanced suspiciously between me and Kacey s mom.
Oh my God, she finally blurted. You two slept together.