23. Foster
23
FOSTER
F rom that point on, Raina rarely took her hands off me. As we walked across campus toward my last class of the day, she linked her arm through mine and rested her head on my shoulder. And during the lecture she kept playing with my hair.
A couple of times, I had to ball my hand into a fist to keep from groaning aloud. But I d always been a sucker for getting my hair played with. I absolutely loved the sensation. She applied just the right amount of pressure, too, which was basically all I felt. There was no hot or cold. Just…pressure.
It was the best pressure ever, though. She could touch me every minute of the day if she wanted to.
When I drove to Archer House that evening, she sat on the center console and rested her elbow on my shoulder. I wonder how Keene s going to react when he learns his mom s a ghost.
I don t know, I murmured with a shake of my head. I only ever really heard him talk about her during grief group. Outside that… I shrugged.
So he was in your grief group, too? she asked, intrigued.
I nodded and glanced up before slowing to a stop at a light. We all were. The seven of us. That s how we met.
Lips parting, she breathed, Oh… That s how the seven of you became the seven. I didn t realize.
Yep. That s how we started.
Well, that s nice, she answered softly. I m glad you had them.
Yeah, I had to agree. I was glad too. Then I blew out a breath as I parked in front of our destination. Here we go, I murmured, killing the engine and glancing at Raina, who was studying the house with a melancholy expression.
I think I ll always remember Kins whenever I come here, she murmured sadly.
You can stay out here if you don t want to go in.
But she sent me an incredulous glance. Oh, hell no. I gotta see how Keene reacts when he s told. Besides, I m supposed to talk to Parker, aren t I? So…
She vanished, only to reappear outside on the sidewalk. Glancing at me through the windshield, she lifted one arm and tapped her wrist to let me know she was waiting.
I laughed and grabbed the boxes of pizza I d had sitting in the passenger seat before opening my door.
We entered through the main entrance, walking straight into the front room where Alec and Keene were playing a video game.
I got pizza, I announced, lifting my voice so everyone could hear.
Keene glanced over warily, then scanned the room, asking, Is she with you?
Raina? I asked, walking around the couches to plop the pizza on the coffee table before I fell into a seat. Yeah. Why?
Gaze frosting with discomfort, he tossed down his controller and pushed to his feet, mumbling, I m not hungry.
As he started from the room, Alec sent me a worried glance, so I lifted my hand and called, Hold up. Before you go, Raina would like a word with you.
Next to me, she straightened in surprise. I would?
Keene froze, then turned back to me with a wince. She would?
I nodded. Yes. She wants you to know she doesn t blame you at all for anything that happened that night.
Oh! Raina tipped her head before shrugging. Well, that is true.
And you shouldn t blame yourself either, I went on, lifting my eyebrows sternly.
Keene s throat worked as he stared back hopefully. She really doesn t blame me?
Not even a little, I assured, glad when Raina patted my shoulder in agreement.
Actually, could you thank him for me, she said. Right up to the very second of the accident, my sister was happy. And she had a smile on her face because of him .
I sent her a wince. I don t want to tell him that. Do I have to tell him that? Leaning in toward her, I lowered my voice. He s already got enough of an ego as it is.
Ooh, tell me, Keene demanded, returning to the couch and plopping down right in front of me. Kinsey bragged about me to her little sister, didn t she? Did she tell you about what I can do with my tongue?
When he glanced around the room in search of Raina, Raina shrugged. I mean, she did say he made her come harder than anyone else ever had before.
My face contorted into a grimace. Yeah, I m definitely not telling him that.
What? What? Keene begged. Tell me.
I shook my head and sighed. Let s just say you sent Kinsey off with a smile on her face, and Raina wanted to thank you for making her sister s last few hours…
When words failed me, Keene guessed, Pleasurable? Euphoric? Explosive? Orgasmic?
Nice! I cried, lifting my hands to stop him there. You made her last night nice . Okay? And Raina appreciates that.
Nodding in delight, Keene smiled and glanced at Alec. You hear that? My sexual prowess even has street cred among the ghosts now.
As Alec pressed a hand to his brow and groaned, I scoffed. No, you don t. Raina s not a ghost. She s just a disembodied spirit until her body recovers. And her sister s moved on, so there is no ghostly street cred anywhere .
Still, he said, not at all swayed. People in the great beyond know how awesome I am in the sack. This is amazing .
When Hudson hobbled into the room on his crutches, Keene spun with a grin. Yo. Peeps in the afterlife know the power of my dick now.
You mean, that you are one? Hudson teased as he maneuvered his crutches around the couch so he could sit with the rest of us. Cool story, bro.
Keene scowled at him, only to get distracted by the food as Hudson opened the lid of the first pizza box and fetched himself a piece of supreme. Hey, don t hog all of that.
The rest of us followed suit, digging in.
Raina was grumbling about how much she wanted to taste a bite when Damien and Oaklynn arrived, hand in hand. Then, she paused and tipped her head as she watched them make their way over to the pizza and then sit together, where Oaklynn settled naturally onto Damien s lap.
Is it just me? she asked. Or does it look like those two just had some serious sex together?
I choked on the bite I d just swallowed and had to cough my airway free before answering, I m sure they did.
When the others glanced at me in confusion, I said, Sorry. Raina said it looked like Vargas and Archer just had sex.
Raina! Oaklynn gasped in outrage.
And Raina slapped my arm. Oh my God. I can t believe you repeated that out loud.
Ouch! Rubbing the side of my shoulder, I mumbled, I didn t realize that was a comment for my ears alone.
It s true, though, Keene spoke up. Those two are always going at it.
It s pretty rude, too, Hudson added. Especially when some of our girlfriends are at work, and we can t have any ourselves.
Hey, at least you have a girlfriend, Alec mumbled petulantly.
And did Ghost Girl just slap you? Keene asked, pointing at me.
I rolled my eyes. She can t be a ghost. She s not dead.
But she touched you, didn t she? Oaklynn pressed, sitting up in interest. I didn t think she could do that.
Well, she couldn t , I allowed. Until today. I glanced toward Hudson, wondering if this was a good time to tell Keene about his mom or wait until?—
The front door blew open, and Thane hurried inside. Sorry, I m late, he rushed out the explanation. I went shopping with Christine after school, and she wanted us to eat supper together afterward.
None of us had gotten to meet Thane s new girlfriend yet, and for some reason, that already gave her a negative strike in my book. But she always liked to eat at these places that he couldn t stand, which was why no one was surprised when Alec splayed a hand toward the coffee table and offered, Pizza?
God, yes, Thane gushed, surging forward to swipe a loaded piece of meat lovers. We went to this all-vegan health place. There wasn t a thing on the menu I wanted to try. Mmm…mmph. Meat, he groaned as his eyes rolled in delight. And grease. Lord, how I love greasy, meaty, cheesy goodness.
So... Squinting in confusion, Keene motioned around the room. Did we have something planned for tonight?
The room went silent, and everyone glanced at each other before Thane asked, Where s Parker?
Not here yet, Damien reported.
Keene frowned in confusion. Seriously? What s going on?
The rest of us exchanged a glance before I blew out a breath. So I was at the library today.
Okay? Keene said slowly, furrowing his brow, before asking, Public or university?
University, I said. And Raina suggested we go into the basement?—
Wait! Lifting his hands, Keene squawked, There s a fucking basement? In the college library?
I know, right? Alec cut in. Who knew?
Keene glanced at him as if he d lost his mind before he returned his attention to me.
I cleared my throat and continued. Anyway, while we were down there, this woman approached us that I couldn t see. But Raina could. And then Faith and Hudson showed up, and Faith could see the librarian, too. But Hudson could not.
Keene s lips parted, and he glanced over at Hudson. So there s—what—a ghost in the library?
Man, Hudson started apologetically. It s your mom.
Jaw dropping lower, Keene s eyes widened, and Hudson lifted a book in his hand. She said you were looking for this the last time you were there, so she found it for you.
As he handed it over, Keene glanced down at the title.
Immediately, he shot to his feet. Holy shit, he exploded, dropping the book so he could stab his hands through his hair and clutch his head. My mom s still around? Are you sure?
Hudson winced in apology. We re sure.
Why—but why did she never try to contact me ?
She said she didn t want to scare you, I answered softly. She didn t know if ghosts scared you or not. And she said she was happy enough just to watch over you.
Keene spilled out a half moan, half-incredulous laugh. But why—why is she still here? Why isn t she—why didn t she move on?
The rest of us shook our heads. We don t know.
Well, I gotta find out.
When he took off, Alec leaped to his feet as well. Wait! I ll come with you.
No. We ll all go with you, Thane insisted.
Keene ripped open the door, ignoring them, only to lurch backward when Parker spilled inside, stumbling drunkenly.
Bumping into Keene, he gripped his shoulder and greeted, Hey, hey! There s the man of the hour. Congrats on your mom, Duggie. Looks like she loved you enough to stick around and keep an eye on you. Unlike my parents.
Fuck. You, Keene growled, pushing him out of his way. She shouldn t be here. She should ve moved on and found her heaven. And this is not her heaven. Why the fuck isn t she in her heaven?
Cursing, he raced outside.
Keene! Alec shouted, hurrying after him. Wait.
Thane started to follow as well, only to pause at his best friend. Parker… Jesus, he muttered, glancing at his stained, half-tucked shirt. Look at you.
I got him, I assured, tapping Thane s arm so he could chase after Keene. You go ahead.
Thane nodded and sent me a grateful glance before he shook his head at Parker and then hurried off.
Well, that leaves me with you two lovebirds, Hudson told Damien and Oaklynn. I call shotgun. And he started to hobble toward the exit as well.
They all glanced at Parker in worry as he slouched against the doorframe, and he drunkenly saluted them in farewell until it was just me and him left. Plus Raina.
Please tell me you didn t drive here? I said.
He scoffed and glanced away. Of course not. Rented a ride. Too bad it didn t wreck and kill me too.
That—that… Raina shook her head and took a step away from him, unable to believe he would say that. That wasn t very nice.
I sighed, agreeing with her. Come on, I murmured, hooking a hand around Parker s bicep. Keene needs us right now, so we re going to be there for him.
I was an ass, wasn t I? he asked, stumbling along to keep up.
Yeah, I murmured as I steered him from the house and shut the door behind me. But he ll get over it. We always do.
At my truck, I opened the door and helped him up into the passenger seat. Then, I shut him inside and hurried around to find Raina in the backseat, watching me with worried eyes.
He s not a dangerous drunk, is he?
Shaking my head, I climbed in, saying, No, he s all bark and no bite when he s like this. Buckling up, I started the engine, only to sigh when I glanced over at Parker. Man… I started with a sad frown.
I know, I know, he muttered, lifting his hands to stop me there. I m spiraling. I m fucking aware, alright?
I pulled away from the curb and remained quiet for a moment before asking, Is this all because of Raina and her sister s accident, or is something else going on too?
He cursed under his breath and rolled his eyes before muttering, You were talking to her just now, weren t you? She s in here with us.
Yeah, she is.
Great, he said before spitting out a humorless laugh. That s just fucking great.
She doesn t blame you, you know.
Hissing, Parker lifted a fisted hand as if to offer her a cheers. Well, awesome. There s one person who doesn t.
No one else does, either, I assured. No one but you.
Keeping his hand fisted, Parker bumped it against the inside of the passenger side door, just under the window. Once, twice. With each pound, he put a little more power behind his swing.
Suddenly, he turned to me. I heard her dad s a widower. If your girl doesn t make it out of this coma, he s going to have fucking no one.
My insides locked up with the thought.
If she died.
But she couldn t; I wouldn t allow myself to think about that scenario.
Gritting my teeth, however, I nodded at Parker. That s true.
Fuck, he growled and hit the door even harder.
And it s my fault, I said.
What? Raina spat, appearing between the two front seats to scowl at me over the center console. No, it is not .
Meanwhile, Parker swerved around to scowl at me too. Yeah, right, he snickered with a disbelieving sniff.
It s true, I insisted. She saw my picture on a billboard, watched a couple of my interviews, and wanted to meet me. That s all. If I d just met her when Oaklynn first tried to set us up, there would ve been no reason for her to want to track me down that night. She either would ve liked me, and we already would ve been together; or she wouldn t have, and she wouldn t have wanted to look for me any further. So it s my fucking fault.
Oh, what the fuck ever, Parker muttered.
I wasn t done talking, though. Or maybe I should ve slept with Ana Maria on the first date, I said, making him rear back in shock.
Raina glanced between me and Parker before uttering, Say what now? Who s Ana Maria?
If I had, I went on, ignoring her for the time being and keeping my attention on Parker. You wouldn t have felt like you owed me something, and you never would ve helped Raina try to reach me. It s my fault.
That is such bullshit! Parker exploded. None of it was your fault.
Well, my reasoning holds the same amount of water as yours does, so if my guilt is bullshit, then yours is too.
He narrowed his eyes and blew out a long breath. But I ordered the fucking car. I picked that driver for them.
Did you give Tack Martin all the alcohol he drank?
Parker shook his head, confused. Who?
The driver who hit them, I answered. Did you walk him stumbling drunk out to his car afterward and help him behind the wheel? Did you hand him the keys?
That doesn t?—
Then you can t take full responsibility for this, I said simply. There are so many what-ifs and variables that could ve changed the outcome of that night. But what happened happened, and I really don t want to lose you over it too.
He sniffed. You re not going to lose me.
You sure? I asked, lifting my eyebrows sternly. Because if this isn t some self-destructive path that leads to a slow suicide, then I don t know what is.
I m not— Realizing he really was only trying to hurt himself, he snarled at me for voicing it aloud. And then he growled, Fuck you, man.
I shrugged. I m just saying, we have too much other shit going on right now to add saving you from yourself to the list.
Right, he grumbled and glanced out the window moodily. You re an ass.
I smiled as we reached the college. No, I m not.
No, he agreed, turning back to me with a disgusted sigh. You re not. And it s annoying as hell.
As I headed toward the parking lot closest to the library, Parker glanced around the cab of the truck. She still here?
Yep.
He heaved out a breath and murmured, I m sorry about your sister.
Raina tried to set a hand on his shoulder, but it didn t take. So she kept it hovered there as she said, Thank you.
She said thank you, I translated, as I found an open spot to park next to Thane s Equinox.
And sorry I tried to sleep with you that night.
Oh, he doesn t have to apologize for that, Raina chirped. I was totally flattered.
I opened my mouth to tell Parker what she d said, only to pause and send her a second glance. Flattered?
Well…yeah. She shrugged as if her answer should be obvious. I mean, look at him. He s freaking gorgeous. It s got to say something about me to know I was able to catch the attention of a hottie like him.
As I blinked at her, dumbfounded, Parker seemed to read my expression, and he chuckled. I still have a shot with her, don t I? he guessed.
I scoffed and sent him a short scowl. No.
Totally not believing me, he continued to smirk as he pushed his door open. But, Mm-hmm, was all he said as he stumbled out into the parking lot.
As soon as the door closed, I glanced at her. Does he?
Raina laughed outright and gripped my shoulder as if she found my jealousy to be adorable. I guess we ll see once I wake up, she answered elusively. Now, come on, Union. I want to watch Keene reconnect with his mom.
As she popped out of the truck to follow Parker up the sidewalk toward the library, I scowled at the both of them together.
Son of a bitch, I hissed. I did not want to think about Raina hooking up with Parker. So, as I pushed my own door open, I had to reassure myself by muttering under my breath, He doesn t have a shot with her.
From there, the three of us hurried into the library. Once we reached the stairs going down, Parker had to clutch the railing as he swayed unsteadily.
Jesus. Are these the steepest fucking steps ever built or what?
Just don t fall and split your head open, I warned, grabbing his arm to keep him steady.
At the landing, we pushed our way into the basement stacks, where Parker paused in the doorway, wavering. Holy shit. There really is a basement in this place.
Yeah, come on, I urged, tugging on his arm. They re probably this way.
We bumbled along the cramped walkway until we made our way back to the study table where Raina had first encountered Robin.
Everyone else was already there, and Keene was in the middle of it all, tears in his eyes as he watched a floating book shift toward the table and gently land next to another that was already lying there.
Parker pulled up short, blinking at the sight. Am I that drunk, or did a book just float across the room?
Shh, Keene hissed, lifting his hand to shut us up. She s trying to tell me something.
After eight books had been placed side by side on the table with their front covers facing up, all of us crowded around, trying to make sense of them. They were about various topics, none dealing with ghosts or supernatural phenomena at all.
I don t get it, Oaklynn announced bluntly before turning to an empty space of air. What does this mean?
A second later, Raina nudged my arm. First letter of every title, she translated.
I turned to her. First letter of every title? What does that mean?
But Keene had heard me and promptly turned back to the books. S. U. N…
Holy shit, Alec breathed the moment we all realized Robin had spelled the word Sunshine , the pet name she d always called him.
More tears filled Keene s eyes. It really is her. Gripping his head, he turned, trying to find her. Why didn t you tell me you were here earlier? I visited this building almost every day last semester.
Raina leaned toward me whispering, She still maintains that she didn t want to scare him.
I opened my mouth to report what she d heard, but Oaklynn was already filling Keene in.
That s bullshit, Keene rasped, his voice breaking with emotion. You should ve told me. I could ve— He paused to catch his breath as emotions swamped him. Then he gritted his teeth and demanded, What re you doing here, anyway? You were supposed to move on. Why did you stay?
A moment later, Raina breathed in sharply and placed a hand over her mouth as her eyes watered. What? I asked her. What did she say?
But it was Oaklynn who answered. She said she s here for you, Keene.
Me? Keene slapped a hand to his chest and shook his head emphatically. No. I m okay. Don t stay for me. Mom... You shouldn t be stuck here as a ghost. That s not a happy ending. You should be off, luxuriating in some amazing paradise. The only reason I got over your death in the first place was because I thought you were in a better place, being taken care of. I m not— no . You can t put this on me. Don t stay for me.
Oh… Raina whimpered as she listened to Robin s response. Even Oaklynn started to look misty-eyed before she said, She can t go, she rasped, clutching Damien s arm for support. Not until her purpose is complete. Not until you find someone who loves you as much as she did.
Jesus Christ, Keene muttered, crying harder. Mom. No. I m loved. I still have Grandma and Grandpa and the other Grandma and Grandpa. And I have all these guys.
Oaklynn shook her head. She wants you to experience true love. Like she never got to.
But I m happy , Keene insisted. I m okay.
Whoa. Oaklynn pulled back in surprise.
What? Keene demanded. What did she say?
While Raina rested her cheek on my shoulder as if to seek comfort, Oaklynn sent Keene a small wince. She didn t say anything. She just turned away and walked off, clearly done with the conversation.
Dammit, he muttered, scowling around the room. That sounds just like her. She says what she wants to say and then leaves. There s no convincing her of anything. Argh! Balling his hands into fists, he muttered, Damn stubborn woman. I m fine ! His shout went unanswered, though. So he turned to the rest of us. I m not going to let this happen to her. Ghosts are miserable, depressed, trapped souls. I m not going to let my mother go through that.
Guess you better find yourself a true love, then, Hudson said with a shrug.
While Oaklynn defended, Thalia didn t seem depressed at all when she was a ghost.
Neither does Raina, I added.
To which Keene snarled at me, I thought you said your girl wasn t a ghost.
Well, she s ghost…like, I argued lamely.
He snorted. Not listening. And following his mother s example, he stalked off down the row of shelves away from us. The next thing we heard was the slamming of the stairwell door.
Alright, then, Alec announced, clasping his hands together as the rest of us just stood there, glancing at each other in question. That didn t go so bad.