Chapter 12
12
The following morning, Iris jolted awake as her alarm blared. Her limbs were tangled in the sheets and her sleeveless nightgown was pulled askew. She’d been in the middle of a dream. One where she and Angel were riding the Great Wheel again, but this time he wasn’t in a disguise and they weren’t separated by polite distances or covert glances. In her dream, they were huddled side by side in the small Ferris wheel cabin, so close they were breathing each other’s air. Angel was staring at her, staring at her mouth, specifically. Iris gazed back, heart pounding in her ears as he inched closer. His hand skated up her thigh, slow and gentle before giving her flesh a firm squeeze. She gasped and brought her hand up to his face, rubbing along his square jaw, and she leaned forward and kissed him. His mouth was wet and hot against hers. She lifted her hand under his shirt, rubbing that six-pack he’d worked so hard for. Then he was kissing her neck, sucking her skin. She climbed into his lap—and then her alarm shook her awake.
Iris pressed her fingers to the base of her throat and felt her rapid pulse. Breathing deeply, she checked the time and hurried to shower. She closed her eyes as the water ran over her skin, cooling her down. That dream was hot , and she hadn’t had one like it in forever. She hadn’t had sex in a long time, not since Terry. Five years.
Thank goodness for vibrators.
She’d learned in college that casual hookups didn’t do it for her. In order to feel aroused enough to actually enjoy sex, she needed to have some kind of emotional connection with the other person. It seemed her dream was trying to tell her that she had an emotional connection with Angel, which made sense after how much they’d shared with each other last night. But she couldn’t hook up with Angel in real life . The idea was absurd and illogical. She had to put it out of her mind immediately.
But things only worsened from there. On the flight to DC, Iris assumed that she’d sit with Bree again…but Bree sat with Ray. They grinned and whispered to each other, full of energy in the early-morning hours. Angel eased into the seat beside Iris, smiling at her with his gorgeous face, having no clue about her hornball dream. Iris smiled back, swallowing hard, and retrieved her laptop to email Paloma and Dominique. Angel slid on his noise-canceling headphones and pulled out the same notepad from last night. Focusing on work wasn’t usually a struggle for Iris, but she could hardly type a sentence of her email. She was more interested in glancing at Angel and observing the slope of his jawline and how he moved his shoulders when he shifted in his seat. How he nodded his head while listening to his music. The flick of his wrist as he scratched out a lyric that he didn’t like. The way his large hand flexed when he got a cramp from writing too quickly. She couldn’t stop thinking about how her skin had buzzed to life when they’d locked pinkies last night.
Then she zeroed in on his mouth. He bit his full bottom lip as he read over his lyrics, and heat prickled her skin. This was terrible . She was objectifying him! The current Save Face Beauty brand ambassador! She deserved to be fired.
Angel glanced up, reaching for his water bottle, and looked at Iris. She was caught red-handed, staring at him with her greedy, greedy eyes. She turned her head quickly and fidgeted with the screen on the back of the seat in front of her, searching for a movie. Something serious and very unsexy, like a bird documentary. She picked March of the Penguins . She’d seen it at least a dozen times, back when Calla went through a penguin phase after seeing them at the zoo.
Angel leaned his arm on the armrest between them. Iris held her breath. When he tapped her shoulder, she nearly jumped out of her skin.
“Whoa, sorry,” he said, laughing. “What are you watching?”
She glanced at the screen. The emperor penguins were waddling across an expanse of snow in Antarctica. She glanced back at Angel and flashes from her dream accosted her brain. His hand on her thighs. His mouth on her mouth…What was the name of this documentary again?
“Um, it’s called March of the Penguins ?” she said, like she was unsure of the title.
“Is it good?”
She nodded.
“Cool.” Angel smiled easily and slipped his headphones back on.
Get a grip, Iris.
—
Hours later, they arrived at the Refine store in Georgetown, DC. Angel’s fans began screaming as soon as he walked through the doors. After three days, Iris had grown a little more used to the commotion. She gave her opening spiel and introduced Angel, who entertained the crowd during his demonstration. During the meet-and-greet portion, Iris stood off to the side, observing, ready to jump in if needed.
A fan reached the front of the signing line, and she froze in front of Angel, like she couldn’t believe that he was a real. She had braces and long red Senegalese twists. She didn’t look older than sixteen.
Angel smiled warmly. “What’s up?”
“Oh my God!” she shouted, bringing her hands to either side of her face like Kevin McCallister. “I love you!”
She turned to her friends and screamed again. While her friends encouraged her to get herself together, Angel looked over his shoulder and met Iris’s gaze. He nodded his head in a quick motion, discreetly beckoning her toward him.
“Yes?” she said, coming to his side.
“Guess what?” he whispered, leaning down so that only she could hear him.
He smelled divine. She inhaled, exhaled. Blinked at him. “What?”
“I did some research. There’s a Friendly’s an hour away in Maryland.”
She cocked her head to the side. That was the last thing she’d expected him to say. “Really?”
“And guess what else?”
“What else?”
“It’s right next to a skating rink.”
Her forehead wrinkled. “I’m not following.”
“When’s the last time you went skating?”
She couldn’t remember. Maybe at a birthday party for one of Calla’s classmates, but she hadn’t skated herself. “It’s been a while.”
He wiggled his brows. “Wanna go?”
Iris laughed, surprised at the question. Taking a trip to Friendly’s and going skating with Angel had nothing to do with their reason for being in DC. But then again…wasn’t accompanying Angel part of talent care? If Angel had asked Paloma to go skating, wouldn’t she have prioritized his request? Keeping the brand ambassador happy was important.
At least that was what Iris told herself as she answered, “Yes.”
Angel grinned, but their conversation was cut short as his fan, now properly ready for her moment, launched herself into Angel’s arms. Ray tensed, watching the exchange. Angel hugged the girl back and winked at Iris over the girl’s head. This drew the attention of the girl’s friends. They gawked at Iris, a woman in her plain, professional black ensemble, who’d somehow elicited a wink from their beloved Angel.
Iris didn’t want any smoke. She stepped aside again and noticed Ray glance at her with his mouth curved in a small smile. Before Iris could ask what that was about, Bree tapped her shoulder.
“Iris, do you know that woman?” Bree asked, pointing. “She asked me to get your attention.”
Iris followed the direction in which Bree pointed. When her gaze landed on a familiar face, her heart leaped. Staring directly at her, dressed in a pale yellow Chanel suit, was her mother-in-law, Elaine. Iris would have been less surprised to see Michelle Obama staring back at her. Elaine was the kind of person who caught the train to New York City to buy makeup over the counter at Bergdorf Goodman, recommended by a top-end aesthetician. In one hand, Elaine held a shopping bag from J.McLaughlin. In the other, a classic black Chanel flap bag. Pearls adorned her ears and perfectly coifed dark curls framed her face. She wore peach lipstick that complemented her light brown complexion. She lifted her hand and waved excitedly. Iris waved back.
“That’s my mother-in-law,” she said to Bree. “I’m going to speak to her. Can you keep an eye on things?”
Bree nodded eagerly. “Yes, of course.”
Elaine and Terry’s father, Terrance senior, were supposed to come up to New Jersey for Calla’s graduation last week, but Senior had experienced an arthritis flare-up the evening before and hadn’t been fit to travel. Elaine had chosen to stay by his side. Throughout their decades-long marriage, they rarely spent a night apart, but Calla was their only grandchild, so they’d been devastated to miss her graduation. Iris and Calla saw Elaine and Senior a handful of times throughout the year, on holidays and for long weekends.
“Elaine!” Iris said, smiling as she reached her mother-in-law. “Hi! I’m surprised to see you.”
“I’m surprised to see you ,” Elaine said, wrapping her arms around Iris. “You’re in town and didn’t say anything, miss.”
“I know, I’m sorry,” Iris said sheepishly. “I’m only here one day for work, and I knew I wouldn’t have time to see you.”
“Calla is with Dahlia and Benjamin?” she asked, and Iris nodded. “We’re still so sorry that we missed her graduation.”
“We know, it’s okay, really. How’s Senior?”
“Curmudgeonly, per usual. But he’s not in much pain today. I told him I’d stop by Georgetown Cupcakes before I went home.”
Iris smiled. The first time she’d visited DC with Terry, he’d taken her to Georgetown Cupcakes. His favorite flavor had been red velvet.
“I’m glad to hear he’s feeling better,” she said.
“I’ll tell him that you asked about him.” Elaine winked. “He’ll be so jealous that I got to see you and he didn’t.”
Iris chuckled. Terry’s parents had always treated her with such kindness, and although they were pretty traditional, they hadn’t objected when Iris chose to keep her last name after she and Terry married. Elaine and Senior were old-money DC and came from families where everyone went to Howard or Hampton and the children were members of Jack and Jill. They lived in a beautiful home in DC’s Crestwood neighborhood. Terry had been their only son, and after he and Iris had earned their business degrees, he’d worked remotely in New Jersey for his father’s firm. Iris and Terry had assumed they’d eventually end up living in DC once it was time for Terry to take over the business completely, and Iris would take her talents to a new city. Now, Senior was close to retiring and he was grooming one of his trusted mentees to take his place in a few years.
A new burst of screams from Angel’s fans made Iris and Elaine jump.
“It’s quite the event happening here, huh?” Elaine said. “You remember that I volunteer with Girls of the Future?”
Iris nodded vaguely. Elaine volunteered for several organizations. “Can you remind me which one that is?”
“It’s a nonprofit that helps young women prepare themselves for college,” Elaine said. “They went on a field trip to the Alexandria Black History Museum today, and so many of them were crushed to miss the opportunity to see Angel in person. They just love him.” She smiled and lowered her voice. “I have to admit that I didn’t know who he was until they told me. I promised to come by and get a picture, but this line is so long. I guess I spent too much time doing my own shopping.”
Elaine laughed easily, and Iris assessed the meet-and-greet line. Angel was taking a picture with a group of college students wearing Georgetown sweatshirts. There were at least thirty people left waiting.
“Follow me,” she said, ushering Elaine through the store.
“Oh no, Iris, it’s okay. I don’t want to cut the line,” Elaine whispered, but she was smiling, and she didn’t resist as Iris steered her toward Angel.
“Hey, my mother-in-law would like to get a picture with Angel for a local nonprofit,” Iris said to Bree once they reached her. “I’m going to quickly slip her in front. She’ll be in and out.”
Thankfully, Bree didn’t bat an eye and nodded. She walked over to the fan who was next in line, a tall skinny boy with his hair dyed burgundy just like Angel’s and asked him to wait just a moment. Iris quickly brought Elaine to Angel.
“Angel, this is my mother-in-law, Elaine,” Iris said, making a fast introduction, aware that they had to be swift with this interruption to not upset his fans or the overall flow that they’d established. “She volunteers with Girls of the Future, an organization that helps prepare young women for college.”
Elaine stuck out her hand toward Angel and smiled, warm and welcoming. “The girls that I mentor love you so much. They had to miss today’s event due to a previously planned trip, but I told them I’d come by and get a picture of you.”
She pulled a white T-shirt out of her shopping bag. It said GIRLS OF THE FUTURE in thick, black script.
“Would you mind holding this up?” she asked.
“For sure.” Angel took the shirt and smiled at Elaine. He held up the T-shirt as she snapped a picture of him.
“Thank you,” she said. She handed him a marker. “Would you mind signing the shirt as well?”
“No problem.” Angel signed the shirt in a quick flourish. “Do you want a picture too? With me, I mean?”
“Oh no, that won’t be necessary.” Elaine laughed. “I’m just here on behalf of the youth. It was lovely meeting you.”
“Same.” Angel returned Elaine’s smile and looked at Iris.
Iris mouthed Thank you and directed Elaine off to the side and signaled to Bree to let the next fan forward.
“I’ll walk you out,” Iris said to Elaine.
The midday DC sun beamed down on them as they stepped onto the sidewalk. Iris pulled at the collar of her black sleeveless turtleneck dress. Elaine folded her newly signed T-shirt and placed it back in her bag.
“It’s actually a bit serendipitous that I saw you today,” Elaine said. “Because I was planning to call you this week.” She cleared her throat. “Senior and I are selling the house. We’d hoped to tell you in person after Calla’s graduation.”
Shock rendered Iris momentarily speechless. Her stomach sank. “What? But you love that house.”
Their home was Elaine’s pride and joy. It was an interior designer’s dream.
“We do, and we always will,” Elaine said. “But it’s too big for us and it’s getting harder for Senior to walk up and down the stairs.” She smiled softly. “I want you and Calla to come and go through Terry’s things soon. Take whatever you wish.”
Elaine and Senior had left Terry’s bedroom untouched. His posters of the Wizards and Nationals were still tacked to the wall. His handful of Hampton sweatshirts hung in the closet. There were the odd items that every adult left behind, knowing they’d be forever secure at their parents’ home.
A person was not their things. But it had comforted Iris to know that a part of Terry’s memory was preserved at Elaine and Senior’s home. Soon, that would be gone too.
“Of course we’ll come,” she said quietly.
Elaine took Iris’s hands in hers and gave them a firm, loving squeeze. It reminded Iris that the decision to move probably hadn’t been easy for Elaine. The new house wouldn’t have any traces of Terry.
“Good. Just let me know the day,” Elaine said. “Now I really must get going or else Senior will be calling me soon and asking about those cupcakes.”
They hugged tightly, and Elaine slipped on her sunglasses. “Give Calla a kiss for me,” she said.
She crossed the street, heading for a black Audi that waited for her, with a driver who would take her to get cupcakes and then back home to Terrance senior. Iris waved goodbye as the car pulled off.
She wondered what Terry would think about his parents selling the home that he’d grown up in. She thought about how Calla would no longer be able to make similar memories there of her own.
It was silly to feel sad. It was just a house . But Iris felt sad nonetheless.
Sucking in a deep breath, she breezed back inside the store, forced a smile, and resumed her place beside Bree. The meet and greet was almost over, with only a few fans left in line. Iris tried her best to focus on the success of another event. She tried not to think of the first Christmas she’d spent with Terry’s family, and how holding Terry’s hand in front of the sparkling fir tree had felt magical, how Elaine and Senior’s house had felt like a home away from home to her and Calla over the past five years. Iris tried not to think of these things, but it was easier said than done.
“You okay?” Angel appeared in front of Iris. His voice was soft, attentive.
The last fan was leaving the store, armed with a Save Face Beauty skincare bundle and a deeply satisfied smile.
Iris blinked at Angel. Where had the last five minutes gone?
“I’m okay, thanks,” she said.
“Okay.” But he didn’t look like he believed her.
She was fine. She was just having a minor moment. She’d deal with her feelings once she was in her hotel room.
Back at the hotel, Iris made a beeline for the elevator, politely begging off when Bree and Ray asked if she wanted to get a drink. She expected Angel to stay behind with them, especially after he was approached by a fan in the lobby, but as Iris stepped onto the elevator and pushed the button for her floor, Angel eased through the doors right before they closed. Concern was written all over his face.
“Angel, I’m okay,” she said, although now her voice was shaky.
“You don’t look like you’re okay.” Angel paused. Quietly, he said, “Is this because of your mother-in-law? You seemed different after you talked to her.”
Iris bit her lip. “She told me that they’re selling their house and it made me think of Terry’s things and how someone else will be living in his childhood home.” She took a shuddering breath and tried to smile. “It’s silly, I know. Sometimes these little moments jump up and startle me. But I’ll be fine.”
She wiped at her eyes, growing frustrated when she realized she’d started tearing up at some point.
Angel didn’t say anything as he stepped forward, cautious and quiet as a cat. Slowly, he wrapped his arms around Iris and pulled her into his embrace. Her first instinct was to squirm away, because his attentiveness only caused her tears to flow more freely. But soon, she melted against him. The truth was that it felt good to be held, to be comforted. And as much as she disliked crying in front of people, she felt safe to cry in front of Angel.
The elevator opened to her floor. Iris sniffled and stepped away from him.
“Thank you,” she said. She offered a weak smile.
“You’re welcome.” Angel kept his gaze on her.
He walked with her down the hall to her room, saying that he wanted to make sure she got in okay. When she fumbled with her key card, he gently took it from her and opened the door, letting them both inside.
Iris had a standard king-size room. Clean, efficient. It was probably nothing compared to the suite they’d booked for Angel. She slipped off her heels, sat on the bed and massaged her temples. Crying always gave her a tension headache.
Angel moved around the room silently. He grabbed a glass off the table and opened the mini fridge. Then he sat next to her, holding a glass of water.
“Thank you,” she said, taking it from him gratefully.
She felt like she owed him an apology. The behavior he’d witnessed just now had been a bit unprofessional.
“I’m really sorry—”
“Who takes care of you?” he asked.
Iris paused. “What?”
“When you’re upset, who takes care of you?”
“I—” She didn’t know how to answer that question. Because she didn’t have an answer.
“I get the sense that you’re used to taking care of everything for everyone else,” he continued. “Your daughter, of course, and Violet told me that you’re like a second mom to her and Lily, and I see how you handle things at work. I know you said you’re in therapy. But outside of that, who takes care of you when you need it?”
Iris sniffled again, wiping her eyes. She shrugged. “I take care of myself.”
“Yeah, but we all need help sometimes.”
She knew that he was right. She’d been taking care of herself for so long, she struggled with asking for help and couldn’t recognize when she needed it. This was something she’d discussed with Marie. Ever a work in progress.
“You know what I think you need?” he said, easing back on his elbows. He grinned softly as he looked at her.
“A nap?” she said.
He laughed. “Maybe. I was going to say a nice, clean skate.”
She blinked. Then she remembered. “You mean the skating rink in Maryland?”
“Yeah. We’ll bring Bree and Ray.” He smirked. “You ever seen a six-foot-four, two-hundred-fifty-pound ex-bodybuilder on skates?”
Iris shook her head as she began to smile. Angel seemed to move through the world with such light and ease. She wished to be more like him, if even for a moment.
“Me neither,” Angel said. “We should go for that image alone.”
She recognized that he was trying to cheer her up and she appreciated it. And his suggestion was probably better than staying in her hotel room, replaying her conversation with Elaine over and over.
“Okay,” she said. “Let’s go.”