Chapter 31 #2
I don’t want to bring her mood down when she should be having a good time on her trip.
A sulking boyfriend won’t do any good.
“I miss her a lot,” I mumble.
“Why don’t you just invite her back?” Jessica asks, her frustration shining through.
“I want her to do the things she loves, explore the world. Don’t sit here and wait for me to get back from practice.”
Jessica rolls her eyes and takes the phone from Luke’s hands, ready to give me a lecture.
“How the hell you were the relationship expert whenever this idiot messed up? I have no clue, because seriously, Sebastian, you need to take a page out of your own book.”
Jessica isn’t wrong; I was the one helping Luke find some clarity when he faced struggles in his relationship with Jessica.
It’s very different when you’re the one experiencing the turmoil, though.
Now I understand his perspective of wanting to protect the other person, even if it hurts oneself.
“I promised myself I wouldn’t tell you this, as I hoped you would figure this out yourself, but I guess I don’t have a choice. Lily told me herself that she wanted to stay in London with you.”
At my expression, Jessica gives me a soft smile and a nod, reassuring me that yes, I did hear her correctly.
She wanted to stay?
And I didn’t even ask her.
God, I’m a fucking idiot.
“But her trip? And her plans?” I ask them, feeling at loss.
Looking back, I recall instances when she didn’t seem eager to go back, but then she would put on her brightest smile and talk about jet skiing and tanning, which made me think she was looking forward to it.
“She was scared you might want to go back to your routine without her,” Jessica says, making me feel like an even bigger asshole.
Hell, how could I make her feel that way?
After my chat with the boys, I’ve made a plan.
I found a gap in our calendar where I could take the trip, if the coach gives me one-and-a-half-days off.
The biggest problem is that we have a game.
He might not agree to that, but I have to at least try.
I’ve never missed a game and will probably be lectured about having my priorities straight.
Right now, though, the only priority in my mind is Lily and making sure she knows how I feel about her.
I’m grateful for Jessica telling me, even if I wished I had figured it out on my own.
Sometimes, you need a little push from your friends.
“Thanks, guys. I’ll talk to my coach tomorrow and hopefully go get my girl,” I tell them, a beaming smile taking over their faces.
“Sounds like a plan.”
～
“This is very unusual for you, Bennet.”
Coach is looking at me strangely—probably wondering where his dedicated player has gone.
I’m sitting in his office, and I’ve just requested time off to go see family.
I can tell he wants to dig more.
If he does, I’m planning on being honest.
I have to go see her.
“I know, coach. I don’t plan on making this a habit. My plan is to actually bring this specific family back with me to London.”
Saying it aloud feels good.
Ever since Jessica told me that Lily wanted to stay in London, even if I don’t know how long she’s envisioning, I’ve felt lighter.
Knowing I’ll have her here with me.
Over the last two weeks, I’ve reflected a lot on the loneliness I’ve felt at times in London.
I’ve never really thought too much about it until Lily came along and brightened my world—quite literally.
Before her, my days were just full of routine. I’ve done that routine every day, without question or dwelling about how it made me feel.
Then she came along, and everything changed.
Suddenly, I was experiencing the city through her eyes, and my perspective changed.
Doing life alone, when you’ve had the opportunity to do it with someone else, just isn’t the same.
“Is this the blonde you’ve had around?”
I’m not surprised he’s noticed.
Lily has been at every game, sporting my jersey and calling my name.
She’s also been with me to the stadium most days, watching in on our practices and working on her paper.
During the last weeks, she even talked to Fredrick and Ian, who had some questions about pressure and nerves they wanted to discuss with her.
I’ve told them great things about my sessions with her, and the pride swelled when they asked me if it was okay for them to speak with her as well.
“That’s the one,” I confirm.
He gets a thoughtful expression on his face, and I wonder if he has his own family at home.
It’s never crossed my mind to ask.
Coach is a very private man, never sharing too much with us.
Now, though, I’m curious whether he has a family or if football is his sole focus in life.
“I’ll let you go, Bennet. But so help me God, if you don’t manage to bring her back with you, we’ll have a problem. You’ve been shit these past few weeks.”
Leave it to him to be blunt and tell me exactly how it is.
He’s not wrong, though.
I’ve been playing worse.
My sleep is a mess with tossing and turning until I’m exhausted.
Harriet has kept me well-fed as always, but my breakfasts have gotten worse by the day, as I wake up without an appetite most mornings.
“I plan on it. Thank you. I appreciate this a lot.”
I stand and grab his hand in a handshake.
“Go get your girl, Bennet.”