Chapter 21
Hope hadn’t worked with Sophia on a delivery before.
The new midwife had only joined the team two weeks earlier, not long after Matilda, who’d taken Hope’s place at the hospital.
Sophia seemed lovely, but Hope had to admit she’d been keeping her fingers crossed that it might be Jess who arrived to help with the delivery as the patient moved into the second phase of labour.
She’d done her best to hide her disappointment when Sophia turned up and she just hoped she’d pulled it off.
There were only two days now until Hope had to give Jess and Anna her decision about whether or not she was staying, and she still didn’t know what she was going to say.
She’d been hoping that if Jess had turned up to assist with the delivery, she might say something that could sway the decision one way or another.
Since the conversation with Joe, Hope was more confused than ever.
There was no doubting she felt a connection to him that went way beyond the one she’d felt with Laura, and the truth was she wanted the opportunity to get to know him better.
She’d tried telling herself that maybe their jobs had bonded them, but deep down she knew it was more than that.
The knowledge she felt that way came with two huge side orders of guilt.
The first was because of the impact it might have on Esther, but the second was even more complicated.
The guilt she felt about her parents back in Tenby twisted in her gut.
She didn’t want them to think for a second that there was anything lacking in the life they’d given her.
That wasn’t the reason she wanted Joe in her life.
It didn’t diminish the love she had for her mum and dad, it was just that somewhere along the line she’d found a place in her heart for Joe too.
It had made her wonder if she’d been too hasty with Laura, and question whether she’d been the one to close things down between them.
At the time it had felt like a mutual decision, but now she wasn’t so sure.
Had she shut that possibility down out of a sense of guilt her parents would never have wanted her to feel?
She wasn’t sure, but she was open to finding out.
For now though, she had a patient to guide through the birth of her first child.
Alice had come in for her thirty-eight-week check, thinking that the pains she was experiencing were just Braxton Hicks.
They hadn’t seemed strong enough to her to be the real thing, but when Izzy had examined her, she’d already been eight centimetres dilated and had been transferred straight to Hope’s care in one of the delivery rooms. Alice’s husband was on his way home from work in Truro, but things were progressing very quickly, and she’d been fully dilated within ten minutes of moving to the delivery room.
Alice had kept repeating that she needed to slow things down, but the urge to push had taken over and now they were almost there.
‘The good news is that I can just see the top of the head and I think with the next contraction the baby will be out.’ Hope smiled up at Alice as she completed her examination and her patient promptly burst into tears.
‘Oh no, Alice, what’s wrong?’ Even as Hope asked the question, she was certain she already knew the answer.
‘The baby’s coming too fast. Freddie’s not going to get here in time and he’s going to miss the birth.
’ Alice was still crying. ‘I don’t want to have the baby without Freddie here.
I’ve waited five years for this moment and we’ve been through hell, a vasectomy reversal we didn’t know would even work and his ex-wife saying horrible things about how much it would upset their children if he had another baby, even though she was the one who walked out on him.
I just wanted it so much and I told Freddie I wasn’t sure I could stay if we didn’t at least try.
He promised me that he wanted it just as much as I did and the children were so excited when we told them I was pregnant, not even a tiny bit upset. But now he’s going to miss it.’
‘I know it’s not the same, but if you give me your phone, I could set it up to video the moment when the baby arrives?’ Sophia offered. ‘Maybe we could even video call him? I’ve done that for a patient before and it was still a really emotional moment.’
‘No!’ Alice shook her head violently. ‘He’ll be driving, he left work as soon as I rang him to say the baby was on its way and it won’t be the same, anyway.
He was there at the birth of his other two children, with his ex-wife, and I don’t want this one to be the only one he doesn’t see. It isn’t fair.’
The last of her words came out on a sob that turned into a grimace, as another contraction took hold of her body and there was nothing she could do to slow it down. No one could, no matter how much they might want to try.
‘Remember what I said, just try to pant and don’t push too hard, we want this to be slow and steady,’ Hope urged.
‘I don’t want this at all.’ Alice’s head was still thrashing from side to side, her words coming out in a growl. ‘I want Freddie and I want him to see our baby being born.’
She almost screamed the words as the baby’s head crowned. There was no stopping any of it.
‘Well done, Alice, that’s baby’s head out. It won’t be long now.’ Usually the words Hope had just said would bring the mother comfort, but this time they just brought forth more tears.
‘No.’ Alice seemed to slump back against the pillows, but she couldn’t control what was going to happen next, no matter what she did.
Hope was convinced it would only be a matter of minutes and that the baby would be delivered with the next few contractions, but when they came, the baby’s shoulders didn’t emerge as she’d expected them to.
It could just be Alice’s body resting, meaning the uterus wasn’t contracting strongly enough for there to be any progress until it was ready to go again.
But as the next contraction came and went, and there were still no shoulders, Hope had a horrible feeling there was more to it than that.
When she examined Alice again, she was almost certain. The baby’s shoulder was stuck.
‘Sophia, can you go and get another midwife for me, please. We’re going to need to do a McRoberts manoeuvre.
’ Hope kept her voice calm, as though she was asking for something as simple as a cup of tea.
The last thing she wanted to do was panic Alice, but shoulder dystocia was a medical emergency that could put both the mother and baby at risk, if it wasn’t resolved.
They were going to need to use a similar kind of manoeuvre to the one she and Annie had performed on the beach in Tenby, when the baby had arrived with the cord tightly wound around its neck.
In that instance, the baby had been in the right position for delivery, with nothing preventing its arrival, and the manoeuvre had been aimed at removing the cord from around its neck as safely as possible.
This time they needed to use it to get the baby’s shoulders out, which were currently wedging it in position, before either the baby got into serious stress, or Alice was forced to undergo an assisted delivery, or even a C-section.
Those were two things she’d very clearly stated in her birth plan that she wanted to avoid, and Hope was praying they could give her what she’d asked for.
The manoeuvre they were about to perform was the first course of action in these circumstances and it was usually successful, but it was going to need three people to help Alice get the baby out.
‘Is something wrong with the baby?’ Alice’s face had drained of all colour and she was biting her lip. She might have got her wish to slow things down, but she needed her husband more than ever right now.
‘Baby’s just a little bit stuck, Alice, that’s all, and we need to get you to change positions to help the shoulder out.
’ Hope’s tone was bright and breezy, and her patient’s face seemed to relax in response.
‘I’m going to start by adjusting the bed and then we’ll get you to lie flat.
Sophia is going to come back with someone else to give us a hand, and then we’ll lift your knees up towards your chest to help baby out. ’
The other midwives would support Alice to hyperflex her hips and Hope would apply a downward pressure just above Alice’s pubic bone in a rocking motion, hoping like hell that it would be enough.
Alice grimaced again as another contraction started and all Hope could do was continue to encourage her patient to try and pant through the pain, silently urging Sophia and the other midwife to get a move on.
As the contraction eased and the door to the labour room burst open, Hope expected it to be Sophia and another of their colleagues, but it was a man she didn’t recognise.
‘Freddie!’ Alice started crying again, but she was laughing too. ‘Why do you always have to cut things so bloody fine?’
‘I’m sorry, the traffic was a nightmare, but it doesn’t look like our baby is going to take after me.
I can’t believe how quickly it’s come, it’s nothing like…
’ Freddie caught himself just in time, clearly realising that now wasn’t the time to make comparisons with his past experiences of becoming a father.
‘It’s nothing like I expected it to be.’
‘Me neither.’ Alice shook her head. ‘I’ve never been this tired in my life.’
‘Well, we’ve got all hands on deck now,’ Hope reassured her, as Sophia and Jess rushed into the room. ‘Let’s get you lying flat and encourage baby out, now that Dad is here to see the grand entrance.’
‘Can I help?’ Freddie asked, as Sophia and Jess moved either side of the bed, and Jess took a step back to make space for him.