Chapter 7
I got out of the car slowly. “What’s going on?” Luke asked, stepping behind me and sliding his hands around my waist.
“Mike is back. Cassie told me he was coming. I guess I didn’t completely believe her.” He tightened his grip and pulled me closer. “I should go in.” I didn’t move. It felt so good, leaned up against him. He was so solid and warm.
I sighed, and pulled away to face him. “Don’t look so worried,” I said. “This could be a good thing.”
Luke nodded, unconvinced. I felt the same way.
After a quick glance back up at the house, I leaned up to kiss him. “I’ll talk to you…” I hesitated.
“I’ll call you tomorrow,” Luke told me. “And I’ll see you tomorrow night at the dinner at Annie’s house. If you need me sooner, let me know. Ok?”
Again, a warm flood of happiness ran through me like a river. “I will.”
He watched me go up the steps to the back door, and I turned to wave when I got there. Then I squared my shoulders and went in.
Mike was sitting at the kitchen table, a large portion of the contents of our refrigerator spread out in front of him.
The air was thick with his cigarette smoke.
Cassie sat next to him, looking so pale and fragile that I immediately walked closer to her.
I was afraid she would fall out of the chair.
“Emmy Lou,” Mike drawled. Man, I hated that nickname.
“Mike,” I said through gritted teeth. “Are you smoking in here with Cassie?”
“No ‘welcome home?’” He leaned his chair on the back two legs.
“Welcome home. Are you smoking in here with Cassie?”
“Emily, why are you such a flaming bitch?” Cassie demanded.
I turned to her. “Let’s get you up to bed, Cass. You need to get a lot of rest.”
She looked at me for a minute, then must have felt bad enough to actually listen to me. She stood up, and I put my hand under her elbow.
“I’ll take her to bed.” Mike actually slapped her ass, jerking her forward. Cassie pulled her arm from my hand.
“I’ll go with Mike.” She sat back down at the table. “Why don’t you leave me alone, for once?”
“Cassie—” I stopped. “Goodnight.”
Slowly, I climbed the stairs to my room. I remembered that neither of them had known where Charlie was, and neither of them had asked me.
∞
What was that noise? I put my hand over my ear and buried my head further into my pillow. Stop.
I jerked up. My phone was ringing! I reached for it wildly. “Hello?”
“Good morning, Cinderella,” Tara’s voice said. “Do you ever look at your phone? I’ve been texting you.”
“Is Charlie ok?”
“He’s fine, just wants to go home. I’m sorry to wake you, but I seriously could not put him off any longer. Diego can drop him by.”
“No, no,” I said quickly. “I’ll come get him. And it’s Sleeping Beauty, you dummy.”
I sat up and checked my phone again. There were four texts from Tara, and one missed call. Luke.
It was quiet in the house, which now smelled like stale cigarettes. I peeked into the hallway. Cassie’s door was firmly closed. I grabbed my clothes and bolted into the bathroom, locking it behind me, and showered and got dressed as quickly as I could.
The kitchen was a disaster. I looked at the pile of dishes on the table, covered in hardened food and ashes, and shook my head.
I would have to come back to it. I wanted to get out of the house before I ran into Mike—I knew I wouldn’t be able to stop myself from saying a few choice things to him, and I didn’t want to start the day that way.
Cassie hadn’t been kidding when she talked about me moving out.
If it came down to it, she would choose Mike over everything, every time. Over me, over her health, over her son.
In the car over to Tara’s I put the phone on speaker and called Luke, but it went right to voicemail. Darn it.
“Hi, Luke, it’s Emily. I mean, you know it’s Emily.
I’m just calling you back. I was asleep when you called.
I couldn’t get to sleep last night. I guess I’m a little tired.
Oh, you know what means. I mean, I guess I’m a little upset, because Mike is back, and I’m not sure what to do.
I’m going to get Charlie now and I know he’ll want to see his dad but I don’t want to bring him home because Mike, I mean, he really isn’t a good dad, like he never even called while he was gone, and it was months, and he didn’t even ask about Charlie last night.
And I know he isn’t good for Cassie, and I’m not sure what she told him about—” The phone beeped and cut me off.
Crap! Crap! I just threw up words into his voicemail box.
I put the phone down. Ok, it was ok. He probably wouldn’t think I was completely psycho. Maybe all the noise the car engine made would drown out some of what I said.
I got to Tara’s and found Charlie running around in the front yard, while Tara and Diego watched from the front porch.
“Hey, sweet pea,” I called. He ran over to me and threw his arms around my waist.
“Did my dad get here?”
“He did,” I answered, looking up at Tara on the porch. She mouthed, “Oh shit,” and I nodded.
“Yay!” Charlie yelled, literally jumping up and down.
“Charlie!” Tara called. “Come on in and get your sh…stuff together.”
“Everything ok?” Diego asked me. I guessed that Tara had filled him in.
“I’m not sure yet,” I told them.
“Are you taking Charlie back to see him right now?” Tara asked.
“I think I have to.”
Charlie came running out, his bag exploding with his sleeping bag, pillow, bear, and dirty clothes. His toothbrush fell out as he ran to the Bronco, calling, “Thank you for having me!” over his shoulder.
I looked at Tara and bit my lip. “I’m not sure what he thinks is going to happen.” My throat was tight. “He thinks they’re going to have some kind of magical reunion and Mike will be a real dad.”
Tara rubbed her hands briskly up and down my arms. “He has you, right?”
“Always.”
“Then he’s one up on where you were at his age. He’ll be ok.”
I nodded.
Charlie was leaning forward as I drove down the driveway, as if he could push the car faster with his body weight.
“Pal, do you remember before your dad left?”
“Yeah.”
“What did you guys do together?”
He shrugged. “I don’t know. Stuff.”
“But you were telling me that you thought he would come to your meets, and you would go fishing together now. Do you still think that will happen?”
“Yes.”
I bit my lip. “Charlie—”
“I don’t want to talk about my dad right now.”
We rode the rest of the way in silence, my stomach churning with nerves. When I slowed down to turn into the driveway, I glanced over at Charlie. He had a huge smile on his face. “There’s his car!” He jumped out of the Bronco and ran up the steps, and I followed as quickly as I could behind him.
Mike and Cassie were in the kitchen among the dirty dishes, Mike smoking again, Cassie looking like death warmed over. “Daddy!” Charlie yelled, and threw himself at Mike.
He looked surprised, but genuinely pleased. “Hey, little man, what’s up? How’re things?”
“I missed you, where have you been?” Charlie asked, his voice muffled against Mike’s chest.
Mike laughed a little, then looked at Cassie helplessly, gesturing at his son with his cigarette.
“Charlie, get off him,” Cassie said.
“Come here, pal.” I put my hand on Charlie’s shoulder, and reluctantly he let go of his father and stepped back.
“What are we going to do today?” Charlie asked him.
Mike looked puzzled. “I’m going to watch the ballgame. It’s spring training. I don’t know what your mom has planned for you.”
“Cable’s out,” I informed him. “Charlie, please go upstairs and put away your stuff.” Slowly, he turned away and picked up his bag.
When he was gone, I turned back to Mike.
I was trying very, very hard to reel in my temper.
“Mike, he thinks you guys are going to hang out today. He hasn’t seen you in a long time. ” Start small.
“Well, if the cable is out, I’m going to try to find somewhere that has the baseball game on.”
“Uh huh.”
“Emmy, leave him alone and let him relax. He doesn’t want to have to watch Charlie today,” Cassie said. She rubbed Mike’s neck and smiled hugely at him. “Go find the game, and we’ll call to get the cable fixed, ok?”
I turned and walked after Charlie up the stairs. He was sitting on his bed, holding a Lego spaceship.
“Hi, pal.” He didn’t answer. “I was thinking about going to the beach. You interested? It’s a nice day.” Nothing. “We could ask some of the guys from your class. What about Rocco?”
Charlie shook his head. His face was the picture of misery, and it broke my heart. “Let’s get out of here,” I told him. I had to return the Bronco to Martha and Carl later, but I would worry about that when the time came.
Slowly, Charlie stood up. “Should we bring a frisbee? A football?” He shrugged. I packed a bag with both, and towels. We left through the front door, avoiding the scene in the kitchen. “I bet we find blue sea glass today,” I remarked as we got into the car. “What do you think?”
“Probably not,” Charlie finally responded.
At least he was talking. Should I probe? Leave him alone? “What do you think about your dad being here?”
He looked out the window. “He just wants to watch baseball.”
“Yeah, I know.”
“He used to watch football, and hockey. Or go meet his friends.”
“Yeah.” Mike had always had something to do, and none of his plans ever included Charlie.
“Well, I’m really glad I get go to the beach and do other stuff with you.
I like it a lot.” I reached over across the bench seat, and took his little hand.
He let me hold it for a while. “Because you’re my best sweet pea. And I love you so, so much.”
He looked at me. “I love you too,” he said. We drove in silence for a while. “Are you leaving ever, Emmy?”
“Nope,” I told him. “You’re stuck with me for life. I’m not going anywhere.”
“Even when I grow up?” He had a little smile.
“I’m planning on living with you in your dorm room when you go to college. Do you think your roommate would mind?”