EPILOGUE
As Victor pulled the rental car to a stop in a cloud of swirling dust, he spotted his mother on the porch of her three-bedroom ranch-style home, holding a hand over her eyes.
Victor slid out of the car and went to the trunk to get his luggage.
He had it in hand by the time Johnny extracted his long body from the car and stood, squinting in the desert sun under the brim of his baseball cap.
“Hot as Satan’s balls out here,” Johnny said just as Victor’s mother got within hearing distance. Victor gave him a chiding glance before extending his arms and swallowing his mother in a strong embrace.
“How was the drive?” she asked when she pulled away.
Victor shrugged. “Hellish, but it wasn’t bad once we got through the mountains.”
“That’s good.” Now Victor’s mother turned to Johnny, who extended his hand for her to shake without hesitation. “You must be the Johnny Stearns I’ve been hearing about.”
“Nice to meet ya, ma’am,” Johnny said with that charming smile he used on any woman over the age of 40. Or under 40, for that matter. “Lovely place you got.”
Victor’s mother shook his hand, giving him a subtle once over.
Victor had no clue what to expect between Johnny and his mother, as they were very different in personality and background.
However, Johnny had assured Victor he’d won over many a mother, and because Victor knew how Johnny could be with women, he decided to trust him.
His mother would be a much harder nut to crack than your average buckle bunny.
His southern charms might fall flat if she didn’t think he was worth Victor’s time.
“Best get your things and come inside before you roast,” Victor’s mother advised. “What can I help you with?”
“We got it,” Johnny assured her, pulling his luggage from the trunk.
“I made you lunch, so I hope you’re hungry.”
Johnny perked up at the mention of food. “I’m always hungry.”
“That’s what I like to hear.” Victor’s mother smiled a little before turning and heading back into the house.
Victor bent to greet her dogs before shouldering his backpack and carrying his duffle bag up onto the porch and into the house.
He headed straight through the kitchen and living room and into his old mauve-painted bedroom, which his mother had cleaned out except for a few of his old trophies and framed photos.
Victor put his stuff on the full-size bed and then returned to the kitchen, nearly colliding with Johnny in the process. Somehow he’d snuck up right behind him.
“This your childhood bedroom?” Johnny asked.
“Yeah.”
Johnny ducked past him and threw his luggage on the floor by the bed. Then he collapsed onto the bed with a heavy sigh. “Those your trophies?” he asked, pointing to the shelves of trophies over Victor’s old dresser.
“Yeah.”
“And that little kid on that paint pony is you?”
“Yup. Her name was Sprocket.”
“Very cute.” Johnny sat up to get a better look at another photo of Victor next to his father, who had his arm thrown over his shoulders. “That’s you and your daddy, yeah?”
“Yeah.”
Johnny stared at the portrait for a few seconds before reaching out and grabbing Victor’s wrist.
“What?” Victor asked, even as Johnny dragged him forward and down onto the bed with him. Victor laughed, flopping down next to Johnny as Johnny wrapped an arm around his neck and planted a firm kiss on his cheek. “What’s this for?”
“Just glad to not to be in a fucking car or plane right now.” Johnny planted another kiss on the side of Victor’s nose, and Victor giggled like an idiot. “I’m excited to meet your mama. Seems like a bit of a hard ass.”
“She can get like that.”
“I ain’t worried. I got two weeks to work on her.”
“Yeah, good luck with that.” Johnny squeezed him tight, almost enough to choke him. Victor snorted. “I’m serious.”
“Ain’t no woman in this world or the next who don’t find me at least a lil bit charmin’.”
“You overestimate your skill.”
“You think your daddy would have liked me?”
“Definitely.”
“Really?”
“He liked everyone. You would have enjoyed meeting him.” Victor swallowed around the lump in his throat.
He lamented all the milestones his father had missed in his life, and he really would have liked Johnny.
Victor could imagine them on the porch at night, swapping rodeo stories, laughing so hard they started wheezing.
Considering Johnny’s relationship with his own father, Victor could have lent him his for a taste of what paternal love could look like.
“Don’t be gettin’ all teary-eyed now. We only been here five minutes,” Johnny chided, though Victor could hear the empathy in his voice.
“I’m not teary-eyed,” Victor objected, then sighed and sat up. “I guess we should get something to eat.”
“Yeah, let’s do that. I’m starvin’.”
Johnny and Victor slid off the bed and returned to the kitchen, where Victor’s mother was making up ham and salami sandwiches.
She asked about the flight and the drive, which Johnny supplied to her in adequate detail.
Within ten minutes, the conversation was entirely between Johnny and Victor’s mother while Victor happily consumed his lunch.
Just as he promised, Johnny’s energetic and jovial nature started to work its magic—Victor’s mother was already starting to loosen up and smile more.
His mother had a slew of questions about Johnny when Victor first told her they were dating, including his background and who his parents were.
Victor hadn’t told her about what a piece of shit Johnny’s dad was, nor had he mentioned Johnny’s spotty past with alcoholism.
He didn’t want any of that tainting how she saw him, because he’d been sober for nearly a year now and Victor didn’t want that old baggage dragging him down.
He also knew how his mother would take it, and she had a judgmental streak.
Best not to bring it up until it became a problem again.
After lunch, Victor and his mother took Johnny on a tour of the farm, showing him the barns, pastures, and horses, including Blitz’s half-brother, who was retired and old as shit but still feeling fresh enough to perform a smiling trick when Victor waved his finger.
Then Victor’s mother’s boyfriend Tom showed up, so that turned into a long conversation with Johnny about his rodeo career, which was fascinating to Tom, someone who had grown up in Seattle.
It was funny to Victor that in Oklahoma Johnny’s accent had no swaying power at all but in places like California, it did a real number on folks.
Then again, the accent probably wouldn’t do much without the force of Johnny’s personality.
They’d had a very early flight, so after the tour and meeting Tom, Victor and Johnny both took a long nap.
By the time they rose, Victor’s mother had ordered pizza, and Tom wanted to talk about Victor’s business.
Maybe Tom was growing on Victor a little bit—not much, but he seemed like an alright guy.
When nighttime rolled around, Victor and Johnny headed out onto the porch swing to eat snacks and stare out into the inky darkness of the desert.
“Sure is quiet,” Johnny remarked. “Bet you could bury a body out there and no one would ever know.”
“Really? That’s the first thing that comes to mind?”
Johnny shrugged and tilted his head back to drink the last of his lemonade, which came in a bottle shaped like beer so it made for an acceptable replacement. “Jus’ sayin’.”
“We have a couple horses buried on the property.”
“You ever see any ghosts roamin’ around?”
Victor snorted. “Horse ghosts?”
“You never know.” Johnny held out the bag of potato chips he was currently destroying. “Chips?”
“Not hungry,” Victor said with a roll of his stomach. He wasn’t digesting the pizza very well.
“You alright?”
“Yeah, just a little nauseous.”
Johnny stared at Victor’s profile a moment before saying, “You tell your mama yet?”
“No.”
“When you plannin’ on doin’ that?”
“Two minutes before we leave, probably.”
“You think she ain’t gonna take it well?”
“She probably will.” Victor sighed. “I just don’t want to have the conversation.”
“Hmm.” A horse snorted in the distance, but Victor wasn’t sure what paddock. Johnny reached for Victor’s hand and squeezed it. “It’s up to you.”
Victor sandwiched Johnny’s hand for a moment, running his thumb along the soft blonde hairs on the back of Johnny’s thumb. This year was going to be completely fucked no matter how Victor structured it, but he was willing to suffer through it if it meant satisfying one of his only lifetime dreams.
Johnny gently pulled his hand from Victor’s grip and placed it on the back of Victor’s neck, drawing him in so he could plant a kiss on his forehead. “I think I’m gonna head to bed, ‘less you want me to stick around longer.”
“No, it’s fine. I think I’m going to sit out here a few more minutes.”
“Don’t think too hard.” Johnny tweaked his nose with a wink, then peeled off his leather National Finals Rodeo jacket to drape over Victor’s shoulders before he stood and vanished into the house with a clap of the old wooden screen door.
Victor pulled the jacket tighter around him, reveling in the heat and smell of it as he faced the endless night.
* * *
Victor slept four hours. He woke around 2 am with the strong urge to retch, so he leapt out of bed and barely got to the toilet before he threw up.
He’d hoped he was quiet enough about it that no one in the house would notice, but he’d forgotten that his mother had the ears of a bat, because after he’d gargled a few mouthfuls of water in the sink, his mother suddenly appeared in the threshold.
“You okay?” she asked, brow furrowed.
“Yeah, I’m fine,” Victor said to his reflection, wiping a hand over his mouth.
“I have some Alka-Seltzer if you think that would help.”
“I’m fine,” Victor repeated.
“I hope it wasn’t that pizza you ate.”
“It’s nothing, Mom,” Victor replied with a heavy sigh.