Chapter 47
Ariana
“We only want what’s best for you, Ariana. And that’s being here with us. The doctor said that’s how you would get better. See what happens when you leave? You get sick! This is why we tell you to stay close.”
I can move my body, so sleep paralysis has to be ruled out. By process of elimination, I’m definitely in hell.
The entire living room smells like an omega I’m not fond of. The sofa’s been soaked through with the sweat from my fever. Cole’s nagging has lasted for what seems like hours. Despite the occasional shivers that wrack my body, no one has done so much as offer me a blanket.
Traitorously, the bond in my chest has eased its aching. Every other part of me screams in agony, each nerve on edge. I’ve been avoiding inhaling through my nose, holding my breath as long as I can bear.
Their scents are as enticing as they were the day I met them. The biological pull has not disappeared, the same way the bond didn’t when we were separated. But now, being surrounded by their pheromones makes me want to vomit.
I miss my pack. Not the pack forced on me, but the one I’ve fallen in love with. Replaying memories with them in my head is all that keeps me clutching onto sanity. In the hospital, they said they’d come back for me.
I was so delirious I’m sure whether I imagined it or the fever was speaking, but it doesn’t matter. If I can’t make it back to them, they’ll find me. I believe it regardless. My alphas won’t leave me alone here.
That’s if I don’t find a way out first.
“It’s not the only way the doctor said I would get better.” My sudden words cut Cole off in the middle of his lecture. “You could break the bond too.”
“That’s not happening.” Liam declines firmly.
“Why? Because you love me so much?” The sarcastic question comes out of me immediately. They turn to each other in displeasure at my response. It’s been this way for hours, ever since Cole dragged me back into their apartment.
The three of them have come and gone, alternating between their offices and supervising me on the couch. Once again preoccupied with work, if I had to guess. Ian’s been growing steadily more irritable throughout the day, scowl growing deeper.
There’s only one upside to being around them. The fever’s been reduced. With it, so has my constant awareness of the bond. It’s almost as easy to ignore as it was at my pack’s home.
My scent matches try and tug at it. It’s too late for that. The more they do, the more disgust I feel with them internally.
Instead of the leash I’ve always known it as, the bond’s become a frayed rope.
The alphas stand on one side of this tug of war and I on the other.
The rain from that night has turned the ground under us too muddy for them to pull me in, but they won’t stop trying.
The more they tug at it, the more the rotten rope tears apart instead of pulling me in.
Only their scents are enticing. Everything else has become repulsive. Including the way they act shocked when I speak, as they are now. I almost can’t believe they expected me to come back and quietly go along with everything they said.
Except I can, because that’s what I did for a decade. Maybe if I hadn’t met my pack, I would have been doing it for the rest of my life. The Coates simply showed me another option. I’ve found my voice, and I have no intentions of losing it again.
“What is it that makes you want to leave so badly?” Ian asks. He’s settled on an armchair, turned to face the sofa I’m laid on. He has a cigar in one hand, and Amy’s hips in his other. She’s seated in his lap, watching between us.
That’s weird, he only smokes when he’s stressed. He looks perfectly at ease at the moment, though.
Cole turns from him to face me. “You may not have heard,” he pauses, “while you were sleeping.”
The apple scented man’s been dodging the words bond sickness or hospital. I think skirting around it lets him believe I had a simple fever.
“But we never meant for you to leave. We were still in rut. It made us sensitive to what Amy was feeling.”
He lifts his hand to brush my hair and I recoil before it comes close, making the hand drop. He can avoid saying what happened or claim it was the rut’s influence, but it doesn’t absolve any of them from blame. Not that they’re apologizing.
I never meant to be bonded when I came to them for my first heat ten years ago either. Here I am, though. Still paying the price for my naivety.
“If you had just listened, you would have understood Ian was only trying to teach you a lesson. That’s the problem, Ariana. You didn’t listen and took things too far.” Cole’s gentle chiding is so ridiculous I only stare at him in response.
Liam sighs. “We have enough going on without having to placate you, Ari.”
I’ve spent a decade placating them and navigating their tempers. Having to appease me is where they draw the line.
“I don’t understand it. We’ve given you everything you’ve ever wanted. We’re even being generous enough to forgive your,” Liam’s eyes linger on the marks on my neck, “transgression. If Amy’s what’s been bothering you, aren’t we even now?”
“You didn’t answer my question,” I echo Jason’s words from all that time ago. “Do you love me?”
Liam’s expression makes it clear he thinks I’m being ridiculous. “Why are you asking me that? We’re scent matches.”
Nodding, I smile at him. It’s almost the exact answer I gave my pack before. “Would you love me if I wasn’t your scent match?” I continue without giving him time to answer. “I don’t care, honestly. Because you’re my matches, but I don’t love you.”
The room has gone silent, every pair of eyes focused on me. I don’t look at anyone but Ian. “You wanted to know what else the Coates pack has on you? Break the bond, let me call them, and I’ll tell them to stop now.”
I shrug. “Or you can try and keep me here forever. But I’m not going to play my part anymore. Is it worth ruining your life’s work for an omega that doesn’t love you?”
Ian lets out a puff of air from his cigar. “And become the laughing stock of the town? I don’t think so, sweetheart. I don’t need you to love me or to make them stop. As long as you’re here, I have something to negotiate with.” He taps Amy’s hips twice, making the small blonde stand.
He rises after her, pressing the cigar between his lips again. “The bond stays. I won’t have people saying I can’t keep the reins on my omega.” Liam follows behind him as he leaves, presumably to his office.
I tell him I won’t play my role, and he finds one for me anyways. Instead of watching him go, I look at Amy. “Isn’t he romantic? Which chess piece do you think you are?”
The other omega scowls at me. Instead of her normal floral dresses, she’s wearing an oversized shirt. I can’t tell whose. Each of the alpha’s scents have been pouring off her skin. She heads off after the other two, leaving me and Cole alone.
“You don’t have to be so harsh.” He says.
“By pointing out the truth?”
“By saying you don’t love us.”
“I was being honest, Cole.”
His gaze lingers on my face for a long time. “You’re confused.”
He keeps saying that. I haven’t been so sure of anything in my life.