Chapter 2
The restaurant was one of Jake’s favorites, nestled downtown on the main strip.
Willow knew he liked to come to practice his French, which he had been avidly learning in his spare time.
Honestly, Jake really was one of those multitaskers who could do a million things at once.
Willow sometimes marveled at the fact that he had any time for her.
‘You look dreamy,’ he remarked, raising a glass. As he smiled, he revealed his cute dimples that had made Willow feel weak-headed when she was only thirteen.
‘Did you have a good day?’ he asked.
‘It was busy. We are working nonstop on this new campaign …’
‘Oh yeah.’ Jake’s gaze began to drift as he attempted to catch the attention of the waiter. ‘That sounds … interesting.’
Willow knew she would bore him if she went into any more detail, so she held back. This evening was about them. They had barely seen each other for the past two weeks, so she knew above everything else that they needed this.
The waiter saw Jake gesturing wildly and strode over. ‘Are you ready to order?’ he asked brightly, his notepad ready.
Jake nodded enthusiastically.
‘Pour commencer, nous aimerions du fromage de chèvre, et ensuite le bar, s’il vous pla?t.’
‘Very good,’ the waiter replied in his perfect American accent. ‘And wine?’
‘Juste le vin blanc de la maison, le moins cher.’
Jake sat back with a smug look on his face and handed the menu over. Willow wondered if she should applaud him.
The waiter nodded, giving Willow a wry smile. She wondered if he felt sorry for her. The thought of that made her cringe. She glanced away.
‘What did you order?’ Willow asked once the waiter had left them.
‘The goat’s cheese and the seabass. I’ve been told it’s the best around.’ He paused. ‘I hope you don’t mind me taking charge like that, I just wanted a chance to practice my French. I know you’re going to love it.’
‘Jake, you know I don’t even like fish.’
‘That’s because you’ve never properly tried it before. You always pick at it. And this seabass has been reviewed online as one of the best.’ Jake’s smile widened. ‘Trust me, Willow. I wouldn’t order you something you wouldn’t like, OK? I’ll be having the same.’
‘No, of course not.’ She busied herself laying her napkin on her lap.
‘I ordered the expensive white wine too. As a treat.’
She nodded. Why did he have to lie like that?
From the limited French she had done in school, Willow was quite aware that he had ordered the house white and specifically asked for the cheapest bottle.
Really, she knew she should call him out on it, but she didn’t have the energy for it.
The last thing they needed was another argument.
‘So,’ she said, attempting to change the subject. ‘How was work for you?’
Jake was on another early shift today and had only got in an hour or so ago. She could tell by the dark shadows settling under his eyes that he was tired. Jake was good at masking his exhaustion with a smile.
‘It was alright. Busy as usual, but we made the best of it.’ Jake tugged out his phone. ‘I need to check my latest post. I uploaded it just before I finished. I’m getting so much traction now, thanks to Alex Rose.’
Willow glanced at the screen. Jake had posted a picture of himself posing in his figure-hugging shirt, sweat clinging to his skin.
He looked like an all-American hero – dirty, rugged and strong.
Who wouldn’t be turned on by that? Certainly, she felt a little fizz in her skin.
She wondered fleetingly whether this Alex Rose had similar thoughts.
‘So, how did you get her attention anyway?’
‘I’m not sure.’ He grinned. ‘I guess she likes what I do. She’s even messaged me and offered to help with some promotion.’
‘That’s great …’ Willow nibbled on the bread that was already out. It was dry and tasteless.
‘People like hearing about my work. Obviously, I never go into too much detail – but Alex says they like the danger of it. I guess it’s exciting.’
‘You do dangerous work. It’s great you’re doing so well.’
Willow was always a little in awe of Jake and how he could put himself in the most dangerous situations yet barely seem to flinch. She knew he loved his job, and there was no doubt he was good at it too.
The waiter came back and started to pour the wine. Willow noticed that Jake was staring at her with a kind of amused look on his face.
‘What?’
‘I dunno.’ He took his drink and had a long sip. ‘I just figured you would be more excited for me than that.’
‘What do you mean?’ Willow also sipped her drink. It was very dry and stuck to the roof of her mouth. She frowned. What did Jake expect her to do? Jump up and down in excitement? Start a cheerleading routine for him?
‘My followers have doubled in the last few months. A huge influencer is in touch with me. I have companies contacting me asking me to endorse their products, I mean, that’s a big deal, isn’t it!
I’m even debating taking this clothing brand up on their offer.
What harm would it do, wearing one of their T-shirts on my shift? ’
‘I’m not sure, Jake. Your first job is being a first responder. You can’t forget that.’
‘Of course I won’t forget that. This is just some fun, that’s all.
’ Jake’s tone was sharp. He sat back in his chair, his arms folded.
‘I thought you’d be pleased for me, Willow.
This is your world after all. For so long, I didn’t really understand but now I do.
Even better than that, I’m doing well in it.
I thought that would make you as excited as I am. ’
‘I am excited,’ Willow soothed. ‘I really am. It’s just the online world is a tricky space. I guess I feel differently towards it now.’
‘What do you mean?’
She shook her head. ‘Don’t you think it’s a little fake? And so forced. It’s so easy to get burnt out by it all. And it only takes one small mistake—’
He chuckled softly. ‘You don’t need to worry about me, Will, I’m not going to be making any mistakes.
This is my life I’m documenting. I know exactly what I’m doing and I’m good at it.
’ He reached across and took her hands in his.
‘It’s sweet you care so much though, babe.
That’s what I love about you. You’re always thinking about others. ’
Willow smiled shyly back, trying to ignore the guilty thoughts drifting in her mind. The truth was she hadn’t been thinking of Jake at all.
She had been thinking of herself.
And just how quickly she could get herself out of this world she had created for herself.
Later, Willow lay in bed with her head on Jake’s chest, still warm from sex. It hadn’t been a very long session. More of a familiar, ‘quick kiss and rip your pants off’ kind of routine. Jake had been turned on and fast and even though Willow had enjoyed it, she still felt a little unsatisfied.
‘Was that good for you?’ Jake whispered, his breathing still a little ragged.
‘Yeah …’ Willow traced the lines of his chest muscles, more defined now by his sweat. ‘I could be up for a little more though … If you know what I mean?’
Jake wrapped his arm around her and drew her close. ‘Ah, babe, can we hold off? I’m exhausted. It’s been such a long day. I promise to spoil you tomorrow.’
Willow kissed his skin, tasting the salt. ‘Sure. I’ll look forward to it.’
Except Jake had promised this exact same thing last time they had slept together and the time before that.
She was trying not to get grumpy about these things, but it was hard not to sometimes.
She knew Jake worked hard. She couldn’t even begin to imagine how tough his job was.
In many ways, she was lucky he was up for any sex at all.
She just wished sometimes she could get something more from him.
She rested her head on his chest and allowed her thoughts to drift and swirl.
Around them, she could hear the sounds of the apartment as it began to settle.
The slow whir of the air conditioning, the hum of the fridge.
Above them was the soft thud of footsteps from the professional couple that lived upstairs (and always seemed to be up late).
Outside was the hum of traffic, and even further afield the distant sound of music.
There was always noise here, always signs of people being active and on the move.
This city certainly never slept. Willow remembered how quiet it had been growing up.
How the only sound at night had been owls and the chirping of crickets.
When she first moved here, she had to get earplugs because it had been so loud, she thought she would never cope, but in time she had adjusted.
Except now the noise seemed to be louder than ever. It was keeping her awake.
She rolled off Jake, suddenly hot and uncomfortable. He moaned softly.
‘Jake …’
‘Mmmm?’
‘Do you know where my earplugs are?’
Jake rubbed his eyes. ‘You haven’t needed those in ages.’
‘I know – but I kind of need them tonight. It seems really noisy in here.’
‘It really isn’t.’
‘Well … it is to me.’
Jake groaned and rolled over. ‘I probably threw them out, babe. You weren’t using them.’
Willow frowned. Jake liked keeping the place neat and minimal, but this often meant he would have major purges without even consulting her. He had gotten rid of so much of her stuff without asking.
‘I really need them. I can’t sleep.’
‘There’s not much I can do,’ Jake replied. ‘Why is this bothering you now? Is there something on your mind?’
Willow pulled herself up to sitting position. ‘I dunno – maybe …’
‘Is it work?’ Jake still sounded half asleep. ‘You know you don’t need to worry about that. Your marketing brain will soon snap into place, and you’ll figure it all out.’
‘Yeah maybe,’ she breathed softly. ‘I hope so anyway.’
‘We all have rough patches, baby. This is just your one.’
‘You think?’
‘Sure?’ Jake yawned. ‘That business with Esmae rattled you a bit, that’s all. No one is going to cancel you. Or me. We are both fine. More than fine.’
Willow smiled softly. She had always loved Jake’s confidence. It was one of the first things that had attracted her to him when they first met.
‘Do you ever miss it?’ she asked softly.
‘What?’
‘Home. Honey Springs.’
Jake shifted on the bed, moving up onto his elbow. ‘Huh? What brought that up?’
‘I dunno. I was just thinking …’ She paused. ‘But do you miss it?’
He laughed softly. ‘What is there to miss, Willow? It’s just some deadbeat town in the mountains. It has nothing going for it. Nothing at all. Everything we need is right here.’
‘Sometimes I miss it,’ Willow whispered. ‘I’ve been thinking about it more recently. Was it really that deadbeat? Or was that just what we told ourselves because we wanted a reason to escape?’
Jake pulled her towards him. ‘Willow, we left Honey Springs for a reason. There is nothing there for us now. Stop worrying and get some rest. It’s late.’
Willow allowed herself to curl up beside him, but as Jake fell into an easy sleep, she remained wide awake.
She couldn’t help feeling that Jake was wrong. There was something still there for her in Honey Springs.
And Jake didn’t seem to understand how she was feeling.
Even though she was now wrapped tightly in his arms, she had never felt so alone.