Chapter Four #3
Tor couldn’t, either.
Pel admitted, “And I’ll be honest. I don’t know how I’d have reacted if you’d told me the truth sooner.
I hope we could have talked it out like we’ve done now.
But there’s a chance I would have cut my losses and run instead.
” He gave Tor a rueful look. “Maybe you aren’t the only one who needed to grow up and gain some common sense. ”
Tor huffed out a laugh, hardly able to disagree at this point. “Fair enough. Still, thank you so much for being there for me even when I least deserved it, and for carting me around and taking care of me when I couldn’t take care of myself.”
“That’s my job,” Pel said, expression intent, eyes soft. “Especially now that I know we’re bonded, but the feeling was there before then. That’s what you do with people you care about, isn’t it? Love them and try to take care of them as best you can.”
Tor’s chest felt warm and full, like he’d swallowed a miniature sun. “Yes, I guess that is what you do. It probably explains a lot about my brother; he just goes about it in a totally obnoxious way.”
Pel smiled a little bit cautiously and offered, “He loves you.”
Tor sighed. “I think he does. But he doesn’t seem to trust me anymore, and that hurts.”
But it wasn’t like he could lay all the blame for the distance between them at Varex’s door. Tor had been content to grumble and squander his opportunities. He’d always assumed there’d be more time to sort things out. He’d wanted Varex to reach out to him.
“You’re still going to keep him and his family safe.”
It wasn’t a question, so Tor didn’t take offense.
“Of course.”
Everything that had happened had made Tor more aware than ever that he needed to get things straightened out with Varex, but regardless, the man was his brother, his twin, and Tor loved him.
“We’ll get through this,” Pel told him.
Tor really hoped so. He wasn’t going to think about the fact that a kiss had winded him, and the thought of walking back to the cave was already tiring him out.
He didn’t know how he was going to do this exactly, but he was sure that Pel, Beluna, Cavun, and Denil would row them back to Alossa—well, Lotar, first.
Oh, except he’d have to offer Beluna, Cavun, and Denil the chance to bow out of this. They’d gone above and beyond, and getting Tor to safety was not the same as following him back into danger again.
But they’d figure something out.
Because if Fernila was behind this, if Yomil was involved, there was no saying who could be trusted in Nexa.
The attack had been brazen, but the fact that Tor had been chosen as a scapegoat suggested that they weren’t ready to show their full hand yet.
Tor would just pray that for once in his life, Thurnil could be useful and help protect Ada until Tor got to her.
With Tor probably presumed dead, Cala and Ada might be the only things standing between Varex and the conspirators.
“You ready to head back inside?” Pel asked. “The food’s probably ready.”
Tor’s stomach rumbled at the mention of food, but he ignored it and waggled his eyebrows.
“Hey, we’re bonded.”
Pel looked nonplussed. “Yes, we are.”
“We should celebrate.”
Pel’s eyebrow rose. “Right here?”
Tor tugged Pel closer again and slipped a hand under his tunic. He leaned in to kiss the other man as Pel said, “I don’t think Bel—”
“Absolutely not!” Beluna was marching towards them with a glare on her face. “We are in the middle of a badly defensible area. You can absolutely not have sex out here. Do you know how vulnerable you would be?”
Tor wheedled, “But I just found out we’re bonded.”
“I don’t care,” she said flatly, hands on her hips. “I will kick everyone out of the cave if you want. You’re not having sex out here.”
Tor considered pointing out that he outranked her, but he was pretty sure she didn’t care. He liked that about her.
“But then everyone else would be outside and vulnerable.”
She scoffed. “They wouldn’t be having sex and paying no attention to their surroundings. I can have them sing, if you’d rather.”
“Definitely not,” Pel said.
Tor was grinning now. “It might be fun.”
Pel scowled. “Do I want my brother serenading me while I’m having sex with you? No. Do you want to ever have sex with me again? Then you don’t want that either.”
Pel sounded very definitive, and Tor laughed.
“Seems like that one’s out.”
Beluna rolled her eyes. “I think you’ve walked long enough. How would you like to go back to the nice, safe cave?”
Knowing when he was beat, Tor acquiesced.
He didn’t want to admit that he was tired from mostly standing around, but Pel clearly noticed anyway, because he slowed his steps as they made their way back to the cave. Beluna melted away again.
Tor didn’t think anyone was going to attack them—but since he hadn’t expected an attack at the castle in Alossa, he appreciated that they were keeping an eye out anyway.
He felt reasonably confident that everyone with him now could be trusted, at least, because he didn’t think he’d have woken up if that wasn’t the case.
It was a weird feeling, though, not being certain who he could trust. Tor hadn’t had a lot of close friends before all of this had happened, but he hadn’t imagined that people were out to get him.
He was loyal to the Crown, he’d assumed they were loyal to the Crown, and he hadn’t really thought about it.
Now everyone’s motivations were suspect. Tor didn’t trust Fernila and Yomil, but who else might be involved? Were they in charge? How long had this been going on? Could they prove anything, or would Varex just assume this was all speculation?
(He wouldn’t be wrong, unfortunately.)
Whatever happened, it was going to be messy.
Back in the cave, Pel insisted that Tor sit down, which he was more grateful to do than he wanted to admit.
Pel tucked himself up beside him and piled his plate with food—and now that all this sustenance was right here, Tor’s stomach was letting him know in no uncertain terms how it felt about being ignored for two weeks.
He devoured everything in front of him, and Pel just kept adding more.