Chapter 3 #3
When my thighs wouldn’t stop trembling, his eyes were back on me. He didn’t change his pace, but he sucked me deeper, watching me. I wound my hips faster, fists balled up in his hair, but he didn’t care. His eyes rolled, moaning against me.
Just when he knew what was coming, his eyes were back on me, waiting for it. He hummed again, and it sent me over the edge. Hips thrashing, back arched, toes curled, thighs clamped around his head.
“Zaniii!” I sobbed, tears instantly rolling down my cheeks as my body shook uncontrollably.
He didn’t pull away, just stayed there and slowed his pace. Once my legs unclamped from around his head, he moved slowly, trailing kisses up my body. My breaths still came in short and fast. I was trembling so hard that he gripped my hips.
“Breathe, Dev. I’m right here,” he said, low and rough.
His palms slid up my stomach to my breasts, caressing gently. Then, he sat up, pushing his sweatpants over his hips. He pulled me back down to the edge of the couch, sliding my legs over his shoulders.
He gripped himself and looked at me again. Eyes telling me to say yes, so he could keep going.
“Yes,” I whispered, lips trembling because my body still hadn’t settled.
He pressed his head against me, dipping through my folds. For a moment, he stopped and closed his eyes. Then, he thrust his hips forward, filling me.
He stroked me deep, slow, and steady. Each time he brought me down, my stomach tightened from how deep he was. His bottom lip was tucked between his teeth, hair dangling in his face, but I could see him. I knew he wanted to speed up, but he stayed right where I wanted him.
“Dev, baby… I’m sorry,” he rasped, gripping my waist tighter. “I love you.”
Tears rolled down my face as I stared back at him. He thrusted deeper, stealing my breath.
“Erji’I leyy… wallah asif… ahebbich.” He moaned, staring right into my eyes.
His control snapped as he dug deeper, dragging me down. But I wanted it. I let him move my body the way he wanted. He laid his body flat against mine, holding me tighter. No matter what I did, the tears didn’t stop. I didn’t want to fight it anymore, so I just let them come.
Azani kissed the tears as they fell, then his lips locked on mine, moaning into my mouth.
I could barely make a sound, just low sobs and whimpers from how much he consumed me.
His hips moved faster, forehead pressed to mine.
He was trying to hold on. His breaths and groans turned to moans.
His voice cracked like he wanted to say something, but he couldn’t.
That same feeling came, starting at my toes. Then the warm sensation fell over my whole body. My stomach dropped, and I came, clawing at his back and pressing my lips into his. Three more deep thrusts, and he exploded. Holding me down, still moving his hips as my body collapsed beneath his.
He kissed me through the aftershocks while he tried to settle himself. My hands rubbed up and down his back, trying to bring myself back to reality.
But fear came instead of calm. This was a mistake. You know that post-nut clarity? That shit hit me as soon as he pulled away from me. I stood on shaky legs and went into the bathroom.
Fuck! Why did you do that? That was so stupid.
I sat on the toilet and stared at the wall in front of me. Azani had to go. There’s no way I could let him stay here. He was supposed to pick up his stuff, drop my stuff off, and leave me alone until it was time to get married.
I shook my head, tears spilling from my eyes again.
Once I wiped myself, I washed my hands, then splashed some cold water on my face.
I looked at my reflection, and it looked too familiar.
Fresh passion marks, lips plump like I got filler when it was just from him sucking my lips.
My eyes were puffy from crying my eyes out every day.
My hands touched the door handle, and I swung it open before I lost the courage to go back out there. When I stepped back into the living room, Azani was already dressed like he knew what I was about to say.
His hands were back in his pockets as we stood there staring at each other.
“You want me to leave?” he muttered.
I swallowed hard, legs feeling like they were about to give out.
“Yes,” I choked, trying not to break in front of him.
He walked over to me slowly, then leaned over and kissed my forehead.
“I love you, Devyn,” he whispered, looking down at me.
Then, he walked away, right out the door, and he didn’t take his stuff.
I felt stupid. How would I be able to shake a man who made me feel the way he did?
A man who I was supposed to marry. A man who I knew loved me deeply but lied to me.
Azani was what I wanted, but I didn’t know if I could ever forgive him.
I could blame him, my family, and anyone else involved, but I blamed myself. If I had paid attention to the red flags, none of this would have happened. He knew me too well. He studied me too closely, and I still fell head over heels for him.
Something told me that the secrets wouldn’t stop, though. I’d only reached the tip of the iceberg.