Chapter 36
Olivia
Olivia kicked herself for agreeing to go home with Connor for February break.
At the time, the mind games had been fueling her own delusions.
She and Valentine had been broken up for almost two weeks, and she was seeing less of Connor than ever.
She’d assumed he was spending his time with Tiffany and tried to cancel the trip, but he’d said, “no takes backsies” and guilted her into going by reminding her he’d already booked their flights.
At least she would get to spend time with Christina.
Spending a week with Connor’s family filled Olivia’s cup. It had been a long time since she’d spent an extended amount of time in their hometown, and she’d forgotten how close Connor’s family was.
She managed to avoid her own family—besides Jayden, who joined the Hales for dinner multiple times throughout the week—until their last day in town when her dad caught sight of her in the Hales’ backyard.
She’d been roped into spending an entire day with her extended family, and she was fucking exhausted.
Going home when you had no romantic partner to lean on, no job, no permanent plans, and nothing to show for your life was utter hell.
It had been hours of questions about her future she hadn’t had answers to, quips about parts of her body ‘she should really be working on’ and commentary on her biological clock.
Her grandma offered her the numbers of several ‘nice young men’ she could marry.
And Jayden had been working, so she’d been without an ally.
When she ripped herself free of the talons of her bloodline, she went back to Mark and Christina’s and changed into pajamas, dying to be comfortable. She fell onto the Hales’ couch.
Christina stood and Olivia whined, not wanting her to leave. Mark, following his wife’s lead, chuckled and patted her head. “It’s late, sweetheart. We should all get some sleep.”
The pair slipped down the hall and out of sight. Connor pulled her into his lap as his parents shut their bedroom door behind them. He nuzzled into her neck and inhaled.
The attention put her exhausted body on high alert.
Fucking hell.
How did he not see what he was doing?
Olivia pressed her palm against his chest and climbed out of his lap. “I should go to bed too,” she said.
“No!” he shouted, snatching one of her hands as she tried to leave.
She faced him with raised eyebrows. “No?”
He stood and dragged her toward the kitchen. She followed him. He looked far too cute for his own good in flannel pajama bottoms and a white tank top that hugged every dip and cranny of his abs and back muscles.
God dammit, she was not supposed to be noticing.
Connor ran a hand through his rumpled hair as he gathered bowls from the kitchen cupboards.
Olivia’s heart rate skyrocketed and emotion welled in her chest. She’d been avoiding the treehouse. Visiting their favorite place in the entire world together would do nothing for her efforts to move on.
“I have a surprise for you,” Connor said as he poured massive bowls of Lucky Charms.
“I don’t know, Connor. It’s cold as fuck out there.”
He grinned, eyes sparkling. “I went out earlier to set up a heater. I’ve been waiting all day for this.”
She stared at him, searching his face for any hint of reservation. Trying to think of a reason to avoid their childhood reprieve. She failed.
Her hesitation made him frown, and he gave her a pleading, pouty look. His lower lip jutted out, and she rolled her eyes, giving in, like she always did. She sighed.
“Fine. I’ll go get our jackets.”
A pit formed in her stomach as she bundled herself into her puffy coat to brave the short walk to the treehouse.
Something about his enthusiasm rang false, but she couldn’t put her finger on what.
They carried their cereal across the yard, and when they got to the ladder, Olivia asked, “Should you be climbing like this?”
“Eh,” Connor said. “I’m cleared for everything except skating.”
When he reached the platform, he set his own cereal aside, and Olivia handed him hers to free her hands for climbing. At the top she dusted snow and ice from her hands and the front of her bare legs before claiming her bowl back from Connor.
She opened the treehouse door and stopped in her tracks. She whirled around to face Connor.
“This is so cute!”
“I told you there was a surprise. Go inside before all the warm air gets out.”
She followed his instructions and entered the treehouse, settling onto her beanbag chair and scooping a bite of marshmallow-filled cereal into her mouth so she wouldn’t say something stupid and ruin the moment.
He’d decked the treehouse out with fairy lights. Casually romantic shit like this fucked with Olivia’s head.
Connor settled into the beanbag beside her and said, “It would have sucked to come home and not spend some time in our place again.”
He grabbed the remote from a pocket in his chair and switched on the TV. He navigated to YouTube and hit play on an ambient music video.
“I didn’t think we would get time to be out here together,” Olivia said. “The days went by so fast. I can’t believe we have to be back in Seattle tomorrow.”
Connor nodded. “The break is never long enough.”
He took a bite of Lucky Charms.
The pit in Olivia’s stomach grew; something about the soft way he spoke set off alarm bells in her head.
“Is everything okay?” she asked. “You’re being weird.”
Connor’s Adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed. His voice cracked when he said, “Thank you for coming home with me. It wouldn’t have been the same without you.”
She grabbed his bicep and gave it a reassuring squeeze.
“Of course.” She gestured to their surroundings. “I’ve missed this. I’ve missed you.”
“I always miss you. I’ve missed you since Seattle called my name.”
The reminder of that night did nothing to endear Olivia to him.
She took her hand off his arm and returned her attention to her empty cereal bowl.
She set it on the ground next to her chair and cleared her throat, wiping at her eyes.
She had nothing to say to him. He’d broken her heart.
He’d moved away. He didn’t want her. He’d driven a wedge between them that never fully healed.
Connor handed his empty bowl to Olivia, who stacked it on top of her own. He rubbed his hands over his thighs and then through his hair.
Olivia watched him, the gnawing sensation growing as he seemed to get more anxious. Sweat beaded on his forehead, and he avoided looking at her.
“You look like you’re about to throw up.”
She couldn’t be sure what he muttered under his breath, but it sounded like ‘I fucking might.’ She nudged his foot with her own.
“I have a present for you,” he said.
He reached under his seat and pulled out a shiny wrapped package. Hesitating for a few beats, he handed it to her.
Olivia stared at the small present for a long time. Small enough to fit in her palm, the weight of it had her stomach twisting in painful knots. In seconds she’d gone from worrying Connor might vomit to worrying she might.
“You can open it,” Connor prompted.
She couldn’t bring herself to rip into the packaging. Instead, she handed it back to him. “You can’t keep buying me things. The dresses, the makeup, the letting me stay with you. It’s all too much.”
Connor refused it. “If you don’t open that right now, I’m going to lose my mind. Please.”
He hit her with his signature pouting, puppy-dog face again, and she rolled her eyes.
She should remove herself from these situations.
To move on. But in the fairy-lit treehouse with soft music playing in the background, shadows dancing on the walls, snowflakes floating past the windows, in the dead of night, she couldn’t deny him.
Olivia ignored every warning her body gave her and slid a rainbow-painted fingernail under the tape on the present. Removing the paper revealed an iconic blue box, and she didn’t dare open it before she shoved it at him again.
“I can’t take this,” she insisted.
He took the box from her, pain etched on his face. She gathered their dirty bowls and stood, looking anywhere but at him.
When she turned around, she almost stumbled over him.
He was down on one knee before her, the pretty blue box open and held out to her in offering.
A ringing filled her ears, her fight-or-flight response going into overdrive.
She shook her head and skirted the tiny room; the cereal bowls clutched to her chest like a security blanket.
“No. You don’t know what you’re asking.”
“You aren’t giving me a chance to ask anything,” he said.
Olivia shoved the treehouse door open. The cold air washed over her bare thighs, regulating her senses for a moment before the panic took hold again.
Rational thought fled her mind. She was staring at a moment she’d daydreamed about for years.
But instead of the love and joy she’d always imagined, she followed an urge to flee.
“I’m sorry,” she said.
She had to move. To get out. Away from Connor and somewhere she could process. Because this couldn’t be happening. Her best friend wasn’t proposing out of the blue. He hadn’t lured her to their favorite spot and turned her world upside down.
She didn’t remember running into the house.
Didn’t remember putting the dishes away or walking to the guest room.
The next time she became aware of herself, she was flopping onto the bed, still wearing her puffy coat, hyperventilating.
Tears rolled down her face as she stared at the ceiling and worked to control her breath.
She ran a hand through her hair, spreading the wetness at her temples where tears had gathered.
Inhaleforfourholdforfourexhaleforfourholdforfour. Inhale for four hold for four exhale for four hold for four. Inhale for four, hold for four, exhale for four, hold for four. Inhale for four. Hold for four. Exhale for four. Hold for four.