Chapter Seventeen
Nate didn’t think he’d been this exhausted before. After taking Mae home to her father, who was beside himself with worry, he felt like everything had left his body to the point he collapsed onto the sidewalk when his legs gave way.
He’d dealt with runaways before, but nothing like this. And he hadn’t been confronted by men who exuded danger from every pore of their bodies. It was no wonder Mae was terrified when he found her.
She’d told him the whole story on the way back.
She’d been approached and charmed before, suggesting there was something more for her, and she should make the most of it if she wanted to bring more money in for her family.
Mae had been taken in, believing it would make her father happy knowing she was working hard for him.
But she hadn’t anticipated it would go wrong, and it wasn’t until she arrived that she knew things wouldn't be as she had promised. Nate was glad that she hadn’t been put in uncompromising positions yet, although the salacious looks she got were enough to make Mae want to leave.
She wondered why the other girls didn’t leave.
There were smiles, but it was dead behind the eyes.
Nate suspected they didn’t have anyone who would care if they disappeared, or any family who wanted them back. Mae had been one of the lucky ones.
After a while, he stood up carefully and walked his horse back to the blacksmith’s stables. His trousers were soaked from being collapsed on the ground, but he didn’t care. He could easily change once he returned. And there would be a fire, so he wouldn’t have to worry about that part.
He knew Rachel would be there, and he knew they had to talk.
He needed to apologize to her, to tell her she did nothing wrong.
Rachel was just as wary as he was, and she didn’t deserve to be treated badly.
It wasn’t her fault that his sister was meddling.
Isabelle meant well, but this wasn’t how to go about it.
After taking his horse to the stables, Nate stumbled and slipped his way home. The snow was compact and solid enough to be slippery, and he barely made a dent in it. It was going to be a particularly icy day, he could tell.
At least the day had cleared. The snow had stopped falling, and the sun was out. Maybe it might warm up a little and melt the snow. It would be easier to walk around; Nate didn’t fancy dealing with a broken ankle after someone slipped on a patch of ice, which were, unsurprisingly, common in town.
The house was warm and quiet when Nate entered it. He could hear someone moving around in the kitchen. Rachel was likely making more bread. His mouth watered at the thought of doing that; her bread was delicious, and he could do with some food right now.
Just as he sat on the settee and began to tug his boots off, Rachel appeared in the doorway.
She had an apron around her waist, her hands covered in flour, some smudged on her dress, her face flushed, and her hair coming out of its pins.
And yet Nate couldn’t think of anyone more beautiful than her right now.
He realized he was staring and looked away quickly.
“Sorry I left without letting you know,” he mumbled. “Something came up.”
“To do with work?”
Her tone was clipped, but not as stern as he thought it would be. Nate placed his boots by the fire.
“Young Mae Whitlock had vanished. She’d been seduced into doing work in another town, but it was at one of those… seedy establishments.”
Rachel’s eyes widened.
“What? She was… going to…”
“The problem is with those places, it’s clear that something is going on, but you can’t prove it because it’s cleverly covered up. But the atmosphere…” Nate shuddered. “I was glad to be out of there. And Mae was relieved to be gone. Only a couple of hours and she was regretting her choices.”
“That’s something.” Rachel sat on the edge of the chair Nate had been in the night before. “I can’t imagine how I would feel if I ended up in one of those places. It’s not something anyone deserves.”
“Some girls haven’t got a choice. They don’t often have families, or they’re young and naive and don’t realize they’re being taken advantage of.”
Rachel was silent, and Nate could imagine what she was thinking. She was an orphan, nobody to care for her before she came to Mercy Creek. Would she likely have ended up in the same place as Mae?
That sent a shiver across Nate’s body. He didn’t want to think about his wife in an establishment like the Silver Lantern.
“Do you think you’re going to have further problems with that place?” Rachel asked, twisting her apron in her hands.
“I shouldn’t think so. But if I do, we need to be wary. If he’s preying on young girls, then there will be plenty here who might be tempted. There isn’t much in terms of employment here, and everyone knows everything.”
“Isn’t that sometimes a good thing?”
“Not when you’re seventeen, eighteen years old and want freedom and the knowledge she wouldn’t have anyone listening in on your conversations. Nobody wants their business to be thrown around.”
“It’s easier said than done.” Her mouth twitched in a tiny smile.
“When I was in the orphanage, there were so many of us that sometimes we couldn’t move without bumping into each other, but you could still keep a secret.
We were able to share them among trusted friends and keep them away from those who liked to open their mouths. ”
“Really?”
“You don’t need to look so surprised. It’s perfectly possible.” Rachel bit her lip. “But I understand what you mean. I’ll make sure I’m more vigilant when I’m going out and about, and I certainly won’t take any shortcuts.”
“Given you’re a married woman, I don’t think you’d be much of a target,” Nate remarked.
“I’m not taking the chance. The time when I relax is the time that something happens and proves that theory wrong.”
She did have a point. A married woman was less likely to be a target for men preying on vulnerable women, but there was always a first time. Nate didn’t want to think about the idea of Rachel being kidnapped. That settled some dread in his stomach.
“Nate…” Rachel shuffled in her seat. “Isabelle came by this morning. She told me about the Winter Supper and Dance that happens every year.”
Nate groaned.
“Oh, that. She is obsessed with that.”
“How so?”
“Because it means wearing a nice new dress and dancing with everyone, congregating with a lot of people and having eyes on her.”
Rachel arched an eyebrow in bemusement.
“You sound as if you don’t have the same opinion. Is something wrong with it?”
“Plenty wrong with it. I’m always on duty. Even if I’m not actually working, I have people coming up to me to ask about things that could wait until another time. I always feel like I’m concerned.”
“Is that why you don’t like social gatherings?”
“Partly.” Nate made a face. “I just like my own company, that’s all.”
That was true enough. He liked his solitude, so having Rachel in the house made him uncomfortable, having his alone time encroached. It wasn’t her fault, but it didn’t stop him thinking about it. Nate sat back and stuck his socked feet toward the fire.
“I have a feeling that this business with the Silver Lantern isn’t going to be deterred that easily,” he said. “Something’s going to happen regarding them, I’m certain of it.”
“That’s one way to divert a conversation,” Rachel said with a slight smile. “It’s clear you don’t want to talk about the dance.”
“Rachel, it’s a festive occasion where I never seem to relax, and I have no time for it. Especially with the business of these drifters and the Silver Lantern mob being so close by.” Nate rubbed his hands over his face. “It’s just something that doesn’t interest me, that’s all.”
Rachel didn’t say anything, and that made Nate glance over. A shadow had passed across her face, showing her disappointment and hurt. Immediately, Nate regretted what he’d said. He sat forward.
“That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t go yourself,” he said hurriedly. “I think you should attend with Isabelle and Jack. It will give you a chance to get to know everyone else in Mercy Creek.”
“But attending as a married woman with no husband to accompany me? Won’t people think that’s strange?”
“Given I’m the husband, I doubt that would be the case.”
Rachel’s jaw tightened, and she blinked hard. Then she stood up hurriedly, absently dusting herself down.
“I’d better get back to it,” she said briskly. “I’ve got a lot of things to do.”
“Rachel…”
She walked quickly into the kitchen, closing the door a little too hard behind her. Nate groaned and buried his head in his hands. He didn’t need to guess that he’d said the wrong thing. He’d turned down Rachel’s offer to go to the ball, and now she was upset with him.
He did feel guilty for that. It wasn’t her fault that he didn’t like going, and Rachel only wanted to know her new home better.
But the thought of being around the townspeople who kept needling him about business that could wait for another day, the press of people around him and the loud music, plus all the dancing…
It felt like a nightmare for him. Nate was happy to stay at home and make the most of the quiet, even if he could hear the music from the other side of town.
Rachel, though, needed to settle in, and a dance would be the best way to do it. It was just not what he wanted to do.
He had to make it right. Nate knew it wasn’t just about him anymore. He needed to do this for his wife. And he had to stand up for her.
Getting to his feet, grimacing as his still-damp socks squelched on the rug, he padded over to the kitchen.
Rachel was at the table, vigorously rolling out some pastry.
A pie tray was beside her, along with bowls of assorted fruit.
Was she making his favorite pie again? Nate felt his stomach growl, reminding him that he’d not had anything to eat since the evening before.
“Rachel…”
She stiffened, but she didn’t look up. Nate took a deep breath and entered the kitchen, pulling out a chair to sit down.
“You’re going to get covered in flour if you sit there.” Rachel continued to roll out the pastry. “And with you still rather damp, it’s going to stick to you like a paste.”
“I’ll risk it.”
She grunted and carried on with what she was doing, carefully putting the pastry into the tray. Nate watched her, noticing how smooth and relaxed she was even with the tension in her shoulders. She was a consummate professional, even when she was at home.
It was strange to think of their home as being the same, but Nate knew it was true. Even if Rachel didn’t completely agree. And he was aware if he carried on as he was, he was going to make their home cold and difficult to live in. He wasn’t about to make that happen.
“Listen, I’m sorry.” His voice croaked out his apology. “I don’t mean to be so harsh. It’s just…”
“You don’t need to explain anything to me,” Rachel said crisply. “I’m not someone who should care about how you treat me, am I?”
“That’s not…”
“I may be your wife, but not a wanted one. You might as well treat me like a servant and the contempt I deserve.”
Nate stared at her. What was going on there? Rachel sounded like she was turning into a housekeeper. He felt the guilt stab at his stomach.
He’d faced criminals and found himself in situations where he needed to think on his feet, and yet when it came to Rachel he was unsettled and on the backfoot all the time.
Maybe it was because he hadn’t been married before and he didn’t know how to navigate a marriage. It was possible. Nate hated being in uncomfortable positions, and this was one of the worst.
“I’m sorry for the way I spoke to you, though,” he insisted. “You’ve not done anything wrong. I’ve just never been married. It’s going to take some time to get used to it.”
She glanced at him briefly, something flickering behind her eyes, before she went back to spooning fruit into the pie dish. Nate looked down at her hands, already starting to get covered in flour.
“I need to run some errands. For the house,” he said. “Would you come with me?”
The silence was enough for him to look up, and he found Rachel staring at him in confusion.
“You want me to come with you?”
“If you wouldn’t mind?”
Her lips pursed together.
“I went to the stores this morning with Isabelle. If we’d known you wanted something…”
“I can handle my own shopping. But it would be nice if I had some company.” Nate tried to push the tightness in his chest away. “I wouldn’t mind if you came, but if you don’t want to…”
“All right.” Her response made him jump, and Rachel looked down at the pie dish. “Just let me finish this and clean myself up. Then I’ll be ready.”
“Take your time,” Nate said quickly. “I can wait.”
She glanced at him, and then she looked away, busying herself with the pie. Nate couldn’t bring himself to sit there watching her, not with the awkwardness in the air. So, he stood up and went back into the sitting room, settling in front of the fire and staring at the flames as it warmed him up.
What he should be doing is getting himself back to bed and falling asleep. He’d been awake a long time, and he was exhausted. But Nate knew he couldn’t. He had to carry on, in case he was needed.
Not for the first time, he wished that he had some help. He couldn’t do this job on his own for much longer. He was exhausted most of the time and needed a break. If not, he might collapse and be unable to do his job.
Then he wouldn’t be good for Rachel, or anybody else for that matter.