24. Chapter 24
Chapter twenty-four
— MY TEARS RICOCHET BY TAYLOR SWIFT
Forty-five minutes into our drive back, I finally get service again. Vince gave me my phone before we left, and it was fully charged and ready to go. For the first time ever, there were no notifications on it, and it made me feel like I could breathe.
Vince is convinced that after this big stunt Ralph pulled, he’ll go underground for a few weeks. Nico traced a few leads but came up empty, so that’s the assumption we’re operating under, but Vince has still added extra security for my house and my sister.
Speaking of Liv, I should give her a call. I was able to chat with her a bit, but for the most part, I was completely disconnected. Vince might be onto something with the mountain air because up here, I feel nothing but peace. It feels like my batteries have been swapped out for fresh ones, and I finally feel like myself again—as much as I can in my current situation.
Neither of us has discussed the kiss from the other day, and neither of us has brought up the other kisses that have occurred since then.
Or the fact that Vince slept in the same bed as me for the past four nights.
Or that every morning, I woke up clutching his shirt, only to look up and see him smiling at me—like we did this every morning .
Or the fact that we’re blurring the lines of our relationship and neither of us wants to talk about it. Truth be told, it feels liberating. I like having this one piece of my life to myself for now, and even though I don't know what we are, it’s nice knowing Vince chose to steal all those kisses from me.
He chose me. The thought is hard to wrap my mind around, and for now, I’ll take all these stolen moments with him until our relationship goes back to what it used to be.
Just a bodyguard and his client.
A bodyguard whose hand is on my thigh as we drive home…
But a bodyguard, nonetheless.
I’m about to open my mouth to say something, but my phone chiming a million different times makes me pause. I feel Vince’s hand tense, and as I pick my phone up in one hand, I place the other one on top of where his rests on my thigh.
“Is everything alright?” he asks me.
“Uh, I don't know. My phone is blowing up, but there's a few things from Liv.” I haven't talked to her since before Vince and I kissed. There’s around twenty voicemails timestamped from this morning. The pit forming in my stomach has me terrified, so I pick up the phone and call her. She picks up almost immediately.
“Thank God. Are you guys headed back?”
“Yeah, we just got back. What’s going on, Liv? Did something happen this morning? Did they catch him?” I’d lie if I wasn't the slightest bit excited that this could be the case, but hearing Liv sigh heavily across the phone tells me that isn't why she left me all those messages.
“It’s our parents.”
Fuck. “What about them?” Neither of us has had any contact with them in a year. What the hell could they be doing now? I thought they forgot Liv and I existed .
“Bree…I don't know how to tell you this.” I hear her sniffle across the line, and the pit in my stomach grows heavier, my heart beats faster, and I start to get warmer.
“Tell me what, Liv? You’re scaring me. Are they okay? Did something happen to them?”
“No, but something might if I ever fucking see them again,” I hear Tristan say, realizing I’m on speakerphone.
I switch my phone to connect to Vince’s car so he can hear, too, wanting to cue him in on this if it involves something big. “Vince is on too. Liv, what’s going on?”
“They leaked your story in an exclusive interview. It aired this morning, and now the whole world knows what happened,” Liv says, her voice breaking, and if I could hear through the ringing in my ears, I’d probably say she sounded angry, too.
“No…” is all I can manage.
My own parents leaked the details of what happened to me on the worst night of my life. The one thing I had for myself, the one thing I didn't think I would ever share with anyone online, was leaked because of my parents.
I feel the car come to a stop on the side of the road, and I exit, needing to get out of the car, my mind, and my body. I need out. Vince stays in the car; I know he hates my parents, but Liv is probably telling him the entire story of why we don't talk to them anymore. He already knows that they kept the house I was attacked in, but he doesn't know the rest.
All I can do is scream toward the sky and hope somewhere that my parents hear the echo of it and realize how much they’ve hurt me. Will they ever feel bad? Will they ever care about us more than themselves, money, and their jobs? Will they ever reflect on their lives years from now and regret the things they’ve done?
I can’t see them ever doing that, because in order to feel bad about something, you have to have emotions in the first place.
They’re cold, soulless versions of what I wished my parents were, and I’ll forever be that little girl who chased them around the house. Only now, I’m chasing the versions of them I wish existed, and my legs will disappear before I ever reach them.
Vince doesn't know about our childhood and how they ignored Liv and smothered me. He knows about how they concocted some plan to break her and Tristan up because they hated him. Liv is probably telling him the rest of it, and I’m grateful for that because I can barely get two words out.
Liv is the only one who ever understands because she grew up in the same household. I can confidently say that they are no longer our parents anymore.
Not after this. Not after all they’ve done. This was the final cord for me, because this is unforgivable.
I’m done. So fucking done.
I hear the car door slam before Vince all but crushes me in a hug. His strong arms wrap around me, and I can feel my thoughts start to make sense. That’s what he does for me—he calms every bone in my body. He might be engulfing me in his strong grip, but I’ve never felt safer. I can breathe .
And when he pulls back, I know I have some things to fill him in on.
“Take your time, angel. I don't need it all right now. We can do this in pieces.”
“They’re my parents, you know? You grow up with them, and they’re your biggest role models, your biggest fans. And I thought it was good for a while, but when I was old enough to understand things, I realized they didn't give a shit about either of us. They started to work more and talk to us less. The thing I remember most growing up is Liv feeding me every single night. She was always there, and she used to help me with my homework. When I got my period for the first time, she explained it all to me. ”
Tears start to come, but I keep going. “Liv has always been more of a parent than they ever were. Despite her feeling so alone and alienated by our parents, she was the person I leaned on the most, and some days, I regret doing that, but I was just a kid. Hell, she was just a kid too. And as the years passed, and I started to gain a following online, they started to pay attention to me. Only me.”
“I feel the same way about my sister. She was nineteen when our parents died, and in an instant, she turned into my legal guardian. It was…insane. One minute, we both had parents, and the next, one of us was becoming one. I think that’s why she doesn't want kids as an adult. She had to deal with me growing up as an asshole teenager who just wanted his parents back.”
“I’m sure you were a wonderful kid, Vince. Let her know that, despite it all, she raised a wonderful man. She should be proud. You should be proud of who you are, because I know your parents are proud of who you’ve become, despite it all.”
I swear, I see tears rush to his eyes as he presses a quick kiss to my forehead. “Thank you.”
“Thank you . You do way too much for me, and I feel like I rely too much on you sometimes.”
“Christ, angel, do you realize how much you cloud my thoughts? Do you understand that I never want you out of my head? I don't mind you relying on me because it feels good. It feels good to be wanted by someone, and when that person is you, it feels even fucking better. So, lean on me, rely on me, knock me the fuck over for all I care, but don't you dare apologize because I’m welcoming it with open arms.” He pulls me into his embrace again, wanting to be closer, and I bury my head in his chest as a few tears escape.
When we pull back, Vince doesn't let go of my hand as he squeezes it, a silent way of telling me to keep going with my story. “Liv chose to be my anchor. She chose to fill the role of the parents we never had. But my parents never dismissed me. They would always harp me about something—my next video, my next brand deal, anything they could. It felt like they cared more about the money I was bringing in, rather than me or Liv. I was burned out a few times, struggling to get out of bed, to feel like a person, to brush my hair, and they never let up. I was in school, trying for college, trying to manage my overnight fame all as a teenager. It was hard, and eventually, college faded away because I was already making a decent amount of money. But I never made that decision—my parents did. They thought college was a waste, but I saw college as an opportunity to get the hell out from under their roof. So, I started to accept more brand deals that would take me away because it helped me breathe a bit easier. Liv was in college, so I never felt bad leaving.”
“You just hated coming back,” he says, his voice tight with an emotion I can’t place.
“This place, that house, my parents—they never felt like home. It felt like prison I was sentenced to for life. And then Ralph came into the picture.”
“I hated them from the start, you know. That first day I met you, I disliked them.”
I smile at the thought of him already clocking that without ever meeting them. “You probably listened to that gut of yours.”
He laughs under his breath. “It hasn't been wrong yet.”
“I know.” I squeeze his hand back, sending a thank you through my hand. “You’ve read the police report. You’ve seen the damage he left behind with what he did. There’s really not much else to say about it.”
“Bree, I know it’s tough, but I can tell you’re lying.”
Of course I’m lying. “If I told you the truth, you’d look at me differently.”
“No, I wouldn't.”
“Yes, you would.” Even I look at myself differently since that night. I thought I was strong, a fighter, but that night showed me a different Bree.
“Bree—”
I cut him off. “Vince, don't—”
He cuts me off. “Don't you get it? There’s nothing you could ever say to me that would make me look at you any differently. So say it, Bree. Tell me every thought racing through that head of yours.”
Tears leak out of my eyes, but my breathing steadies as I all but whisper. “I didn't fight back.”
“What?”
“I didn't fight back!” I yell. “I laid there frozen while he touched me, while he whistled, while he changed my life. I. Did. Nothing. I’m a fucking coward! A coward who couldn't do anything but sit still and do what I was told!”
I’m breathing heavily again, and I’ve taken a few steps away from him. I never thought I’d be a pacer like Liv, but right now, I am.
I turn to look at Vince, and he has a solemn look on his face. “Angel…come here.” His arms are out wide.
My feet move of my own violation, and when I feel his arms wrap around me, I force myself not to break.
“Just because you didn't fight back doesn't mean you wanted that to happen to you. As far as I’m concerned, you’re a fucking fighter, Bree. You fight every single day to heal from what he did, and I’m proud of you every single day for not letting him win.”
Tears flood my eyes. I’m done being broken. I’m done letting others have a say over my life, and I’m going to take my goddamn life back if it kills me.
Because here in his arms, where nothing can touch me, I believe I can do anything. And taking control of my life, my story, is exactly what’s on my list.
“Did Liv say anything else?”
“Connie is doing her best to control the fallout, but there’s something else.”
I move my head on his chest to meet his gaze, and more sorrow fills his expression. “Keep it coming, Vince. I might as well know about all the bad shit I’m walking back into.”
“There are some leaked messages between Ellie and Alex floating around. He’s also cheating on you with her, it seems. There’s a message from her telling him that you’re too traumatized to be a good girlfriend, that she could show him a better time, and another one stating how you weren't actually raped and should just get over it and stop acting like a victim.” His face twists in disgust as he recites the messages, and before I can stop it, I burst out laughing.
What the fuck even is my life? “Let me guess, the messages were first, and some reporter called my parents, offered a bunch of money for the full story, and they took it?”
He can only nod.
“How much?” I ask, wondering how much my parents made telling my story to the world.
“Two hundred and fifty thousand dollars.”
I laugh again. “That sounds about right.”
“Are you okay? Do you want to go back to the house? We can stay for a few extra days.”
I shake my head. “No,” I say as I start to walk back to the car. “I have a few conversations to have. We should get going.”
I might be headed to my parents’ house, but that will never be my home.
As far as I’m concerned, I haven't found my home yet, and I don't know if I ever will.
But I’ll fight like hell for it, and maybe one day, one day , it will all work out for me .
Please let it work out for me.
— MAD WOMAN BY TAYLOR SWIFT
I storm into my parents’ house, not bothering to knock because I know they’re home. Vince and I passed about fifteen different news vans on the way in. I know my parents, and they must be rolling over with all this attention on them. I don't think they fully thought this through—exposing my story to the public. After all, the reason they moved to this house in the first place was because my fame became too much for them, especially after Ralph was caught. I had more attention on me than ever, and now, it’s worse.
I hope they’re uncomfortable. I hope they’re afraid to leave their house while the story floats around. It’s everywhere , which means that only another huge story can dethrone it. I hope they start to understand that this is what I feel like every time I leave my fucking house—mobbed, terrified, nervous, and like my privacy is always being invaded.
They deserve to feel a fraction of how I’ve felt because they did this to themselves when they aired my story to the entire world.
I stand in the foyer after slamming the door open, knowing they’ll find me in a minute, and I feel Vince behind me as I hear the slow, calculated steps of my parents. When I see them both appear on the staircase in front of me, I hold their stares.
They look surprised to see me, as if they weren't expecting me to show up after they did what they did.
“Were you scared one of the reporters somehow made it in here?” I ask them, and before they can answer, I speak again. “That’s how I feel every time I hear a door slam, or a loud noise, or whistling. For that fraction of a second, you felt what it was like to be me. It doesn't feel great, does it?”
“Bree, it’s lovely to see you,” my mom says, walking down a few more steps but not meeting me at the bottom.
“Vince,” is all my dad can seem to say.
All I hear is Vince grunt a response back, not wanting to say a single word to them.
“I’ve barely heard from you guys since you moved, and after Liv told you guys off, I considered you to be cut off from me, too.” I take a steadying breath before I continue. “So why, after all this time, are you choosing to keep using my name to get your fifteen seconds of fame? Why the fuck did you tell my story to the world for two hundred and fifty thousand dollars? Is that how much I’m worth to you? If it is, as far as I’m concerned, you two don't deserve to have the title of parents.”
All I hear is my father sigh heavily before he rolls his eyes at me. “You seem angry, Bree.” Seriously? That’s all he has to say?
My mother’s heels click against the floor. “We got laid off a week ago, and we have yet to find jobs, so money has been tight. You must understand why we did it.”
“You expect me to hear you out after what you did? Not only did you tell a story that wasn't yours to tell, you got paid for it. And you got to sit comfortably in those fancy interview chairs while you did it. You two told my story! You didn't live through it, and you fucking told it anyway! Where do you get off doing that?”
“We got laid off because of you! We lost our jobs because of our fucking last name! Your name is everywhere and very recognizable now that you’re with Alex. The partners got tired of reporters camping out in front of our offices and disrupting work hours,” my dad yells at me from the top of the stairs before he comes stomping down, his finger pointed right at me. “All of this is because of you, so don't blame anyone but yourself, Bree! ”
Before I can snap back at him, Vince steps in front of me and grabs my father’s hand. “Lower your voice when you speak to her, and if you lay a finger on her, I’ll kill you.” My father only laughs as he keeps his finger pointed at me.
“Vince, it’s okay,” I say as I put my hand on his bicep. “Dad, I appreciate your misplaced anger, but none of this is on me. I didn't ask to get famous, I didn't ask to get assaulted, and I didn't ask to be fucking stalked.”
I step around Vince but keep him close since I want to leave here as soon as possible. I only have a bit left to say, and then I’m gone.
I’m fucking done. These two people in front of me are no longer my parents. They’re merely two people who conceived me, but Liv is the one who raised me. She’s always been all I’ve ever needed.
“If you needed jobs, that might’ve been easier before you went on a fucking talk show for the whole world. If you’re blaming me for this, then maybe you should take a long, hard look in the mirror, because I never asked to be born.”
“The only reason you exist is because your sister was a failure from the moment she stepped out of the womb. You wouldn't be here if it wasn't for her low potential,” my mother states, a cold bite to her words.
Tears fill my eyes as they talk about my sister like that. “Liv was only two or three when I was born! How the hell could you deem her a failure only a few years into her life?”
“She was slow to develop, but you…you were practically gifted from the time you were born. We always had high hopes for you, Bree, but you chose a different route over what we planned for you.”
I scoff at them, already knowing what they wished I would’ve become. “Law school, right? You wish I would’ve followed in your footsteps and become successful that way instead of this, right?”
The two of them nod their heads. “It’s too much now. We did what we had to. ”
“That’s your excuse? You told the story of the worst night of my life to the entire world because you had to ?”
“And the money, of course.” My dad smiles as he steps back to stand by my mother.
“Holy fucking shit,” I hear Vince curse behind me.
“I want you both to open your ears because this is the last thing you’ll ever hear me say to you. By doing this, you’ve taken everything from me. You chose money and your fifteen seconds over protecting your own daughter. Fuck. You. Both. And Liv is not, and has never been, a fucking failure. She’s a best-selling author whose words will make a lasting impact on her readers, which is more than you’ll ever be remembered for. One day, none of us will exist, but her work, her stories, and my videos will live longer than you ever will.”
Tears fall from my eyes as I grab Vince’s hand and walk out of their house, knowing the two of them won’t say anything back to me anyway. As I walk with my head down towards our car, I hear another door slam, and I jump.
A few seconds later, I feel Liv’s arms wrap around me. I recognize her perfume, and when I feel her squeeze me, Vince lets go of my hand so I can wrap my arms around her.
And I break.
“I’m here, Bree. I’m here,” she says as she rubs circles on my back. I hear Vince and Tristan mumbling something, but all I can focus on is my sister and how comforting her touch is.
“How did you know I was here?”
“Vince texted me. He thought you might need a shoulder to cry on.”
I detach from my sister and turn to face him, a silent thank you passing between us. His eyes are full of longing, like he wants to comfort me, but there are cameras everywhere, and we can’t do anything—not in public, and not until we’ve talked about everything in full.
“Thank you for coming over here for me. ”
Liv tucks a stray piece of my hair behind my ear as tears fall from her eyes. “Always, Bree. You’re my family, and family is there for each other no matter what.”
“I love you, sis. Thank you for everything you’ve done for me. I don't think I’ll ever be able to—”
“Bree, stop. I’m your older sister. You should know by now that I would do anything for you. Driving over here was the easiest decision.” She hugs me one more time before we pull back and take a look at the house our parents inhabit.
I think the two of us have known for a while that we would never invite them back into our lives, but today was the final nail in the coffin. Liv and I are on our own now. Our parents are mere flecks of dust that will eventually fly away as our stories continue.
But, actually, Liv and I aren't on our own—we have each other. And we have Tristan and the entire West family to surround us with love whenever we need it. The two of us have made our own little family, and that’s all I’ll ever need.
As long as I have Liv, everything will be okay. As long as I have Liv, my home exists.
“Ready?” Tristan asks us as he pats Vince on the shoulder. Are they buddies now? Liv and I nod at the two of them.
“I’ll follow you back,” Vince says, moving toward me as we walk back to our car. I can feel his hand behind my back—not touching me, but guiding me to the car, and that almost touch has me buzzing with energy.
Or that could be because of knowing how Vince’s lips taste.
Or the adrenaline of the past few hours is running out.
Despite the craziness of the past few years, I know who my real friends are. I know who I want to go through life with. I’m certain it was meant to be me and Liv against the world. Now, thanks to Tristan, we have a few more people headed to our final destination with us .
Friends by chance, family by choice. I think home is something we can create, and I’m one thousand percent sure I have one with Liv, Tristan, Vince, Teags, and the rest of the West family.