33. The New Boyfriend
33
The New Boyfriend
HAZE
My footsteps are heavy, hesitant. Let’s be real—my footsteps are scared little bitches . I don’t have the slightest idea of why I’m doing this, but I do know one thing: I should probably be anywhere else right now. Memories of Winter on the sidewalk flash through my mind. I mean, goddamn, has she seen herself? She shouldn’t be allowed to look this fucking good.
The trial is a few days away, but there’s no way in hell I’m waiting that long. I need to know about the guy I saw her kissing yesterday, and I need to knownow. Is it serious? How long have they been together? Are they crazy in love?
Does she love him the way she loves me?
Loved, past tense , a voice in my head reminds me.
I weave my way through the crowd and push the thick glass door to the tiny coffee shop open. It’s completely dead. Good. The less people distract her, the more chances I have of getting what I came for.
I don’t know how she’s going to react to my surprise visit. It’s been so long since I saw her. Luckily for me, she’s quite active on social media. All it took was one look at her profiles to find out where she’s working now. I must’ve looked like a predator when I came in looking for her yesterday. I managed to convince the barista to tell me when her next shift would be by claiming to be her friend.
Wow, I really am a creep.
I suck in a breath and come to an abrupt stop near the counter. With her back facing me, she’s humming along to the song on the radio and cleaning a coffee machine.
I clear my throat. “How hard is it to get some service around here?”
She jumps and swivels around.
A thousand emotions cross her features at the sight of me.
“Haze?” She blinks in disbelief.
She hasn’t changed one bit.
“Allie.” I offer her my best I know I broke your best friend’s heart but please don’t hate me smile. Man, how desperate do I have to be to go to her for info? Winter used to say that Allie was team Waze. I guess I figured if there was one person in Winter’s life who wouldn’t completely loathe me by now, it’d be her.
“What are you doing here?” She raises a suspicious eyebrow. She doesn’t look mad or like she’s going to go key my car to defend her bestie’s honor. That’s a start.
“Can’t a guy order coffee?”
She scoffs, not buying it for a second.
“Okay. What can I get you?”
I’m suddenly reminded that I have no clue what this place serves, and I don’t know squat about coffee.
“Just… coffee.”
Way to go, dumbass.
“Yeah, but what kind? All black? Do you want sugar? Cream? And what size?” A sly smile reshapes her lips. She is enjoying this way too much.
“The smallest you have. And all black.”
She smiles. “Cool. Like your heart.”
By the time I realize how bad she just roasted me, she’s already making my coffee.
Meh, could’ve been worse. I’ll take it.
She hands me a cup seconds later.
“Why are you really here, Haze?” She doesn’t beat around the bush.
To hell with it.
“Honestly?”
She nods.
“Because I just found out Winter is seeing someone, and I need you to tell me everything you know so that I don’t lose my fucking mind,” I blurt into a crammed, quick sentence. She’s shocked, stunned by my bluntness, but I don’t have time for denial anymore. Been there, done that. All lying has ever done is ruin my life.
They say we all have that one person. That one person we’ll never really lose feelings for, never really forget no matter how many months go by, no matter how many years wash the memories away. That person we’ll always have a thing for no matter what.
Winter Kingston is my person.
Against all odds, Allie laughs.
“Straight to the point, I see.” She shakes her head. “Let’s get a table and talk. My break is in…” She glances at the large clock on the wall. “Now.”
A dark-haired guy bursts through the door right then.
“I’m here! I’m here!” he says like he expects applause.
“I can see that, Coop,” Allie says.
“I’m not late,” he pants and disappears behind a door labeled Employees Only.
A minute later, I’ve paid and Coop is back to the front to serve the few customers who just walked in. Allie motions to sit down at a table, which I do. We stare at each other for a painfully awkward ten seconds.
“So…” She breaks the ice.
“So…” I repeat.
“You know about Matthew.”
Matthew. That’s the fucker’s name.
“I do.”
“How?” She eases herself deeper into her seat.
“I saw them kissing on the street yesterday.”
She winces. “Ouch.”
I huff a chuckle. “Tell me about it.”
“Let me guess, you saw her after all this time and your heart started beating again?” she mocks and crosses her arms over her chest. I don’t confirm or deny it, staring at the black coffee in my hands. “Well, Kendrick owes me fifty bucks.”
I frown. “What?”
“We made a bet that you’d be back into her life one way or another. I knew you’d never really be over each other.”
My heart leaps forward.
“What do you mean we’ll never be over each other ? As in…”
Could she still have feelings for me?
“What do you want to know, Haze? I only have a few minutes.” She presses.
“How did they meet?” I ask.
“Winter’s job. She works at a five-star hotel now.”
“How long have they been seeing each together?”
She shrugs. “A few months, at most.”
“Are they serious?” Please say no.
“God, I hope not,” I think I hear her mutter.
“I’m sorry?”
“I just said they’re not official yet,” she retracts herself. “Anything else?”
“Have they…”
I don’t need to finish speaking for her to know.
No way that I justasked her that.
“Wow, we’re going there. Okay,” she mocks. “Listen, I don’t know. I don’t think so.”
She’s most likely lying and just not interested in telling me. That’s Allie. Winter tells her everything.
“Is she… happy?” My voice falters.
The mockery in her eyes morphs into ego-smashing pity. There’s something broken about my tone. Fuck, it feels like she dumped me yesterday.
“She says she is.” She nods. “But if you ask me, she’s… different.”
“Different how?”
“Different like she doesn’t really trust anyone. I love the girl to death, but she doesn’t tell me anything anymore. Truth be told, we kind of grew apart. I still see her all the time, but it’s almost as though I’m more her cousin’s girlfriend than her childhood best friend. She’s been like this since, well… you.”
“You must hate me,” I conclude.
She thinks about her reply long and hard.
“I think I hate what your absence did to her more than I hate you.”
I wince.
“Don’t get me wrong. She’s always laughing, she’s made new friends, and she’s been working out like crazy, but something feels off. It’s like she’s in denial. Like she just put her pain on pause or something. She didn’t let herself be a wreck over you. As soon as you left, she just shut it off.”
“Or she just moved on?” It hurts to say.
“Right.” She scoffs. “Must be why she can’t let Matthew touch her.”
She regrets speaking as soon as the words trickle out. Her widened eyes go “Did I say that out loud?”
So, they didn’t sleep together.
A wave of relief rolls over me.
Calm down, idiot. Doesn’t mean she didn’t have sex with a hundred fucking guys after you.
“I have to go. My break’s almost over.” She gets up.
I wish I could ask her a million more questions, but she’s clearly beating herself up over letting that last detail slip out.
“Okay. Thanks anyway.”
She forces a smile and walks off. Getting up, I watch her disappear into the back of the shop and walk out of the building in a surprisingly good mood.
So, she won’t let him touch her, huh?
And he’s not best friend approved?
This trial can’t come soon enough.
WINTER
“A new wife barely a year after his divorce? My, my. Uncle Harry is a player.” Kendrick’s voice echoes throughout the spacious wedding venue, and I chuckle.
“I heard that,” my dad calls from the other side of the room, interrupting his pricey wedding organizer midsentence. I laugh and Kendrick joins.
My cousin does have a point. It is a bit ironic that in less than two weeks, my father will be walking down the aisle with a new woman, but my dad and Judy deserve it. They love each other as much as humanly possible, and after everything my dad has been through during the past year—fighting for the custody of Maika, recovering from the accident that wasn’t an accident at all, coming to terms with the fact that his own wife never loved him—he deserves every single moment of happiness he can get.
When he burst into my bedroom earlier today to remind me that we had to go visit wedding venues, I couldn’t believe I’d forgotten about something so important. Judy has been bugging me about going with them all week.
In my defense, I spent hours on the phone with Matthew last night, wondering whether or not I should wear blue or red to his parents’ charity event this weekend. I fell asleep while he was telling me about the time he rescued an injured animal on his trip to Africa. He must’ve told me this story a thousand times, and although it really is interesting, my eyelids disagreed.
The venues we’ve been visiting are way too expensive. I know it, Judy knows it, my dad knows it. But he claims money is the last thing on his mind, and he isn’t going to hold back on the second best day of his life.
“Is this it? That’s like the hundredth place we’ve seen,” Kendrick whines.
“It’s the fourth,” I mock. “Why? You eager to go back to your girlfriend? Oh wait, you can’t.”
“Shut up,” he groans.
Allie has always been the world’s worst liar. She’s never been good at keeping things to herself—especially surprises—but she still loves to try and pull them off anyway. This year, to celebrate Kendrick’s birthday and their one year together, she decided to skip the secret part and straight up tell him that she’s organizing something for him. After five weeks of begging, she managed to convince her loaded uncle to let her throw Kendrick an epic birthday party on his massive boat. Downside is, between her job and the time-consuming party planning, she hasn’t been able to see Kendrick once in four days.
“Who invited him to visit venues anyway?” I whine.
Kendrick scoffs. “You did, dumbass.”
Crap, he’s right.
“Stop your bickering,” Judy says. After they’ve finished up with the wedding organizer, she and my father march down to us. “Honey, do you want to tell them, or should I?”
My dad smiles. “You can have the honor.”
“This is the one,” she squeals.
“What? I’m so happy for you guys.” I pull her into a tight hug. Judy is an angel sent from above. She showed up at the worst possible time in my father’s life and completely turned it around. Who would’ve thought the nurse my father’s insurance sent would turn out to be his soul mate?
I was certain things like that only happened in movies, but spending so much time together led them to a very real relationship. And, well, here we are, less than a year later, visiting venues for their wedding. He explained that almost dying put his priorities in perspective, and he didn’t want to waste any more precious time. Yes, their relationship evolved quickly, but these two are the couple that could actually defeat the odds and stay together in the long run.
I vividly remember the relief I felt when my father told us his insurance company had called to rectify their mistake; they said he would have access to at-home care after all. I couldn’t believe that they’d just made a mistake on something so important, but when asked about it, my father said, “Good things do happen in life, and there isn’t always a catch.”
“Winter, is your boyfriend still coming?” Judy asks.
“He’s not my boyfriend.”
“Is that why you were giggling on the phone with him all night?” my dad teases. Oh, yeah, Judy taught my father sarcasm. I’m not sure I’m a fan. Still working on it.
“Seal the deal yet?” Kendrick wiggles his eyebrows.
“Learn to use your brain yet?” I retort.
“Answers, please,” Judy insists.
“Yes. Matt will be there,” I give in, ignoring Kendrick’s smooching sounds and his pretending to make out with air.
“Great.” She smiles.
Kendrick snaps out of it. “You know what? Good idea, let the guy come. I bet you twenty bucks he bores everyone to death with his trip to Africa story and the guests leave early, so we can go get drunk.”
Dismissing him, I pull my phone out of my pocket. I have a shift at the hotel in two hours.
“Hi, my name is Matthew. I have rich parents who donate to charities and travel to Africa to build schools. Want to hear about the time I saved a burning village from a hurricane?” he says in a ridiculous high-pitched voice, and my dad fails to repress a laugh.
My family isn’t exactly a big fan of Matt. They think he’s a brag and an annoying spoilt kid, but I see something in him that a part of me has been desperately looking for: stability . He was very understanding when I told him I wanted to take things slow. Immediately said he would wait and didn’t want me to feel pressured. We aren’t officially dating, but we’ve been talking and getting to know each other for about three months now. We’ve kissed, of course, but we’ve never… crossed the line. I don’t know when I’ll be able to let him—anyone—touch me in that way again.
In the way he used to touch me.
So, what if Matt is a bit of a brag? He does amazing things around the world, treats me with respect, and wants a serious relationship. But most importantly… he isn’t a liar.
I met him at the hotel during a painfully boring shift. He was in town with his family for a business event and came to the front desk to ask for my number. I came this close to blowing him off. It’d been such a long time since, well, him .
I wasn’t sure I even knew how to do this anymore. Not to mention I had no idea if I was ready to get back into the dating game. But I eventually gave in, told myself that it’d almost been a year and it was time to move on. He did.
“You want to talk about boring people to death? How about you and Allie stop telling us how happy and in love you are every second of every day?” I fire back.
Kendrick doesn’t argue, because he knows I’m right. I love them together, but these two are the insufferable couple. The couple that make out in public, call each other disgustingly cute nicknames, and talk about having kids and a home after barely a year of dating.
They’re the couple we used to be.
I hate it, but their perfect relationship put some distance between Allie and me. We’re not as close as we once were. I could barely stand to be around them at the beginning.
After he left.
“The trial’s in two days. We have to meet up with my lawyer. Are you good to get home?” my dad asks me.
“Yep. I’ll ride with Kendrick.”
“All right, I’ll see you tonight, pumpkin” is the last thing my father says before both he and Judy walk away.
“You have got to get a car.” Kendrick gets his keys out of his pocket as we make our way to the second exit.
“Meh. One day, maybe.” I shrug.
“I mean, unless Matthew’s chauffeur drives you everywhere from now on,” he taunts.
Sliding into the passenger seat of Kendrick’s car, I contemplate how much my life has changed during the past ten months. I certainly did not expect that my father would be planning his second wedding so soon, or that we’d find ourselves fighting for the custody of my sibling before I turned twenty. I decided to take a year off shortly after I dropped out of school, and I’m pretty damn happy I did. I needed time to figure myself out. I’ve been looking into psychology for a while now. For the first time in so long, I’m actually excited to go back to school, but before I apply, I want to travel a bit. Matt has been talking of going to Europe this Christmas. I could definitely use the time away.
Maybe I’ll even stop looking for him in the crowd when I come back. Maybe I’ll stop hearing his voice at every street corner.
I remember the day we broke up like it was yesterday. The few tears in his eyes, the freaking ocean in mine. I walked out of Vic’s apartment, got into a cab, and never saw him again. Sometimes, I wonder if he’s still in Canada. I have no clue really. Logically, if Marcus is here, he is, too.
“How’s Waze?” I ask.
“He’s so big now. You should come and see him soon,” Kendrick says. It’s such shame that I couldn’t keep him after Haze and I broke up. With my Dad’s injury, it would have been unsafe to have an excited pup running around the house. Not to mention that I was at work most of the time. Waze deserved an amazing life, owners who could take him outside every day and play with him. Kendrick and Allie could give him that—I couldn’t.
“There’s something I have to tell you.” Kendrick’s voice requests my attention.
“Mm?” I ask absentmindedly and text Matt back.
“They found Haze.”
I almost drop my phone.
“I’m not even supposed to know. I showed up when you were still in the shower this morning. I heard your dad on the phone. He said something about Haze calling him yesterday.”
Like my mind is dead set on rejecting any information regarding this guy, it plays Kendrick’s words on repeat.
“W-What?”
“Your dad’s lawyer wanted him to testify. They already asked him.”
“And?” Anxiety grips me.
“He said yes.”
One second you think you’ve moved on, that you don’t care anymore, and the next? You’re crumbling to pieces.
“So, he’s still—”
“In Canada? Yeah. He never left.”
I’m stunned, crippled by confusing emotions.
“I can’t believe my dad didn’t tell me,” I whisper.
“I’m sure he would’ve tonight.”
Haze is in Canada.
I somehow convinced myself that he moved back to the US the day I ran out of Vic’s dirty two bedroom. That maybe Marcus left maple syrup and snow behind and Haze followed. The thought of him miles and miles away made coping slightly easier. It meant I would never have to worry about running into him on the street. Although deep down inside, I really hoped that I would. I had this perfectly rehearsed scene in my head. This moment that would tell me what I always knew.
That Haze Adams was just a pit stop, not the final destination. Just a chapter, not the whole book.
He’d have another girl on his arm. He’d be holding her hand, laughing. We’d exchange awkward smiles and pass each other on the sidewalk like two strangers who were in love once upon another life.
Now I know my moment is never going to happen. I’ll have to see him again in court, testifying about a time when he loved me. His presence in Canada tells me one thing: if Haze is still here, so is Marcus. He still hasn’t avenged his sister’s death.
Or is it that he met another girl? One that gave him a reason to stay? Whatever it is, I’m glad Kendrick told me before I stepped into the courtroom and came face-to-face with my ex. And, as I glance at the date on my locked phone screen, I hate that I won’t see “Two days until we get Maika back” anymore. From now on, I’ll read…
Two days until I see him again.