Chapter 43
RYAN
Holden would not stop talking about my personal life. We walked into a liquor store to grab a bottle of wine for a small dinner party Alex and Jane were hosting later, but the guy hadn’t shut up about Maggie for at least the last forty-seven minutes.
“You should go to the wedding,” he said for the tenth time. “Why wouldn’t you? You planned the damn thing.”
“Red or white?” I asked when we reached the correct aisle. “That’s way more important right now.”
He waved me off. “Whatever Jane likes.”
“That wasn’t the question,” I forced out between clenched teeth, annoyance burning like a red hot coal in my gut. “Just choose. Red or white.”
Without even looking at the shelves, he reached for a bottle and stuck it under his arm. “There. I chose. We’re buying alcohol, man. Cheer up.”
“I’ve never been happier.”
He snorted. “You should tell your face.”
Before I could fire off a retort, a group of women came into the aisle from the other side. They were gorgeous, effortlessly rich-looking, and probably exactly the type of girl I should’ve been paying attention to, but instead, I groaned and started turning.
Flirting was the last thing I had energy for right now, but with Holden by my side, if he saw them, that was absolutely what was about to happen.
Before I could grab him and drag him away, hopefully before he even spotted them, one of the girls started making a beeline us.
A slow smirk spread on his lips as he watched her approach, letting me know that he’d already seen them and had no intention of allowing me to pull him away.
“Excuse me,” she said, meeting Holden’s eyes with a smile that was going to get him in trouble. “Do you know anything about wine?”
“I do.” He held her gaze intently. “Just enough to be dangerous to your plans for tomorrow.”
I let my eyes slide shut. Of course. Of fucking course he’d throw out a line like that without skipping a beat.
As she laughed and pointed toward the shelf, one of her friends came up to me. “How about you? Do you know anything about wine?”
“I know how to open it.”
Holden snorted and the girls laughed, but I just stood there and waited for it to be over.
Unfortunately, he leaned into their attention like flirting between boxed spirits and Pinot Noir had been a lifelong dream, and by the time they eventually moved on, I was considering selling him to be able to pay for the alcohol.
All the alcohol.
“You could at least pretend you’re interested,” he said as he watched them go. “Interested in something other than leaving, that is.”
“I was interested in something other than leaving.”
He perked up. “You were?”
“Yeah, I was also interested in paying for the wine we already picked so this one errand could take less than a whole hour.”
“You’re pathetic.” He sighed, his head shaking as he glanced at me on our way to the counter. “I miss the days when you were a real boy.”
“Same.”
He laughed. “At least you’re admitting it. That’s the first step toward recovery, I hear.”
“I’ve been willing to admit it all along, which means recovery might be a problem.”
Seriously, I should’ve been all over those girls, just like him. Instead, I’d quietly spent at least ten minutes analyzing the many ways in which the blonde’s hair hadn’t been quite the right shade.
It wasn’t like Maggie’s.
“I’m so screwed.” I paid for the wine and headed back to my car with Holden in tow. “Maybe we should just drop off the bottle at Jane’s and go out tonight.”
“I’m game,” he said immediately. “As long as you tell me why you won’t go to the wedding.”
I gave him a pointed look. “Why the hell would I go watch the girl I love marry someone else?”
“Okay, fine. It was a stupid question.” He looked at me across the top of the car. “Maggie is going to want you there, Ryan.”
“What she wants isn’t my problem anymore.”
He raised an eyebrow. “Does that count even if what she wants is you?”
“We don’t know that,” I reminded him. “Besides, even if she does want me, Daniel is the groom. Nothing is going to change that.”
After I pressed the unlock button on my key fob, Holden opened the door but didn’t get in. “Was there a plus-one on your invite?”
I hesitated before nodding. “Yeah. Why?”
He grinned. “Excellent. I shall accompany you to this wedding and together, we shall—”
“No.”
“Why not?”
“You can’t be my plus-one if I’m not going.”
I got into the car and he followed, but he still wouldn’t shut up. “Mom is going, so we should too. Someone has to keep an eye on her.”
“She’s a grown woman. I’m sure she can navigate a wedding all by herself. They’re not known to be particularly dangerous.”
“In those circles?” He snorted. “They’re sharks who will eat her alive if we’re not there.”
“She’ll manage, Holden. Those sharks used to be her friends. She knows how to deal with them. Either way, I’m not going.”
He buckled his seatbelt and promptly twisted to face me. “You cannot surrender this easily, man. Come on. Where’s your fighting spirit?”
“It died.”
“Really?” He sucked in an exaggerated gasp. “I never would have been able to tell.”
I sighed, but the truth was that staying away was the noble thing to do. Maggie had made her choice. She was marrying Daniel. I was still trying to accept that, and seeing her, even as she said her vows to him, would probably set me back weeks.
“All I’m saying is that maybe it’ll give you closure if you attend.” He leaned back in his seat. “Seriously, Ryan. You obviously need it or you would’ve moved on by now. It’s going to drive you crazy if you don’t find a way to either fight for her or move past it.”
“It’s way too late for that,” I said. “I’ve already been driven crazy.”
“So you’re not thinking about going at all? Like, not even a little bit?”
I shrugged. “Honestly, the only thing I’m concerned about is that she might run again.”
Holden frowned. “What?”
“What if she panics and runs again?”
He practically gaped at me. “That’s what you’re concerned about?”
“Yeah.”
“Well, then she runs,” he said like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “Is it really your responsibility to stop her?”
“I don’t know,” I said slowly, my head shaking as I shoved the car into gear and backed out of the parking spot.
Part of me wanted to say yes, of course, it was my responsibility, but the other part knew better. If Maggie ran again, it would be up to either Daniel or Marcus to bring her back. Realistically, I didn’t fit into that picture. I was just an old childhood friend who’d gotten in too deep.
My fault.
I sighed, but thankfully, Holden finally dropped the topic and we drove back to my apartment in peace.
I was still unlocking the door when my phone started ringing, but with the wine and two grocery bags in my hand, I couldn’t reach it as fast as Holden reached his own, which had started ringing seconds later.
He pulled it out of his back pocket and showed me the screen. “It’s Jane. What do you want to bet we’re going to have to run back to the store for something she’s forgotten?”
“Ten bucks says she’s calling not because she’s forgotten something, but to remind you to be there tonight. If she needed anything, she would have called me.”
He flipped me off. “I’ll put it on speaker, but get ready to owe me money.”
As he hit the button, my phone stopped ringing, and we strode inside, setting the groceries down on the counter while the puppy, who we’d eventually named Mickey, acted like I’d been gone for weeks.
Holden riled him up even more as he held his phone in front of his mouth with one hand and used the other to play with the dog.
“Hey, sis,” he said between yelps, barks, and laughter. “What’s up?”
“Are you still with Ryan?”
“Yeah, why?”
“Put me on speaker.”
“Way ahead of you.” He frowned when he caught my gaze where I’d been packing away the groceries in the kitchen. “What’s going on? You don’t sound so good.”
“Are you both sitting down?”
Holden dropped onto the couch and Mickey immediately took it as an invitation to join him, launching himself onto Holden’s lap as I strode closer. “That’s never a good opening. Why do we need to be sitting down?”
“Just answer the damn question,” she snapped, then sighed. “Sorry. It’s just that I’m serious, okay? Sit down.”
I dropped into the spot next to Holden, my hand moving to Mickey’s head on autopilot when he crawled to sprawl out across both of us. Shit, I’m really getting attached to this dog.
“Alright, we’re sitting,” Holden said. “Shoot. What’s going on?”
There was a pause before she let out another sigh. “Colin and I got a call from the lawyers a few minutes ago.”
Everything inside me went rigid. “Dad’s lawyers or Thayer Steelworks’ lawyers?”
Both were serious, but one had significantly further reaching consequences than the other. The color drained from Holden’s face at the same time I felt it drain from mine, that dark barrier sliding up behind his eyes at her reply.
“Dad’s lawyers.”
“Fuck.” I groaned and covered my face in my hands, dropping my head back against the couch. “What does Dad want this time?”
“Well, actually, it’s not about what he wants, though I doubt he’d be opposed to this,” she said carefully. “Holden, are you still there?”
“He’s here,” I said when he just glared at the phone, his eyes narrowed to slits and an angry flush spreading across the tops of his cheeks. “Let us have it, Jane. What did they say?”
“I wish there was an easier way to break the news, but there isn’t, so here goes.” She drew in a breath so deep, I heard it through the phone. “There’s a possibility Dad could be released from prison early.”
I blinked hard. “What?”
“Yeah,” she said. “I know, but they’re talking about him being let out on good behavior.”
Holden sagged against the couch and stared at the floor. I reached out and squeezed his shoulder, withdrawing my hand a moment later when he hadn’t even twitched in acknowledgment.
“How early?” I asked, my eyes sliding shut as I tried to accept that my brother was going dark again.
This had happened with him before too, whenever anything serious went down with Dad’s case. I fucking detested it, but I couldn’t blame him. All I could do was be here aand get the answers he wanted but wouldn’t ask for.
“They don’t know yet,” she said. “It sounds like that depends on the review.”
“Okay,” I said slowly, trying to comprehend that there was a possibility that the man who had detonated our entire world might be walking back into it soon. “Did they say anything else?”
“No.” She laughed weakly. “They thought we’d be excited, so they called just to give me the news. They don’t know any more than that yet.”
“Alright, well, let us know if you hear anything.” I took Holden’s phone gently out of his hand and brought it closer to my mouth. “Do you want us to come over early so we can talk about this?”
“No, let’s just process and wait until we learn more. Then we can try to figure it out from there.”
I nodded. “Yeah, okay. That sounds like a plan. Thanks for calling, Janey. We’ll see you later.”
“Later,” she said quietly, then hung up, leaving Holden and me sitting shoulder to shoulder, both staring blankly at the television while Mickey slept across our legs.
“Well, there goes the neighborhood,” Holden muttered. “Do you have any fucking idea how bad it’s going to get if they let him out?”
“Yeah, it definitely won’t be great.” I rolled my lips into my mouth and pulled in a deep breath, trying to calm my suddenly pounding heart.
“Look, I’m not any happier about this than you are.
We’re finally doing okay as a family, Mom is starting to come out of her shell again, and the company is stronger than ever, but we always knew he was going to come out eventually. ”
“Sure, but not now.”
“Fair enough,” I conceded, lifting my ass to pull my own phone out of my pocket when I remembered the call I’d missed earlier. That might’ve had something to do with Dad too, and if it did, it was better to find out now. “Whatever happens, we’ll deal with it. Let’s just take it one step at a time.”
I unlocked my screen, my heart dropping all the way to the floor at the name waiting with the notification about the missed call. It hadn’t been about our father, but in a way, this was worse.
Maggie had tried to call me. And just to top off a day that had abruptly turned my whole life upside down all over again, she’d left a voicemail too.