Chapter 26 - Victoria
As the air cools ever so slightly, the sky above us begins to change, giving way to the early stages of nightfall. The outdoor string lights dangling overhead eventually turn on in preparation for the impending darkness, lighting up the outdoor space.
The meal is long over, but glasses continue to clink while the boys nurse their cigars and exchange stories I’m sure they’ve told countless times before.
Despite the subtle discomfort lingering in my stomach, it’s a nice scene. It feels warm and vaguely familiar, even if I never got to experience anything like this before in any of the homes I went to.
It’s foreign to me, but it’s still endearing.
As much as I want to participate and mesh-like one of them, the whole thing feels like a dream I’m half awake for.
They all seem so happy and in good spirits. Elena hasn’t stopped smiling since we sat down. Mikhail and Sergey are keeping everyone entertained, and Nikolai and Ivan are even more involved.
And, of course, there’s Roman.
He’s glowing—likely even more than I am.
His smile comes to him easily, and right now, he looks completely at ease. There’s a genuine light in his eyes that seems completely new…and he keeps looking at me like I’ve given him the most precious gift in the world. As if this is a sacred thing for him, and he’ll never forget it.
I know it’s precious…I know this baby is something to look forward to and something to celebrate. I want to be just as happy. But everything else feels so heavy, it’s hard for me to wade through it.
It’s clear this is something Roman has dreamed of. This family unit with structure and stability—something that isn’t broken.
Ever since I was young, I knew that was something I wanted for my future children, too. I’m fully aware it’s possible and tangible now. He’s practically offering me all of that on a silver platter.
But it doesn’t look quite so shiny knowing everything else. Being aware of the blood spilled just to get it.
While Mikhail goes on about some story from high school, Roman’s hand gently finds mine beneath the table. At first, I flinch slightly, but I don’t pull away.
Instead, I feel the gentle stroke of his thumb across my skin, almost like a subtle offer of comfort and reassurance. There’s a tenderness in the way he touches me, and while it’s soothing and offers me a glimmer of hope, that tenderness feels overshadowed by the dark underbelly of his business.
Not too long ago, we were nearly gunned down by Roman’s rival—my brother, of all people. The man I was forced to marry and am now carrying a baby with already knew my true identity before I did. He knew about my bloodline and my connections to the Bratva. To Maxim.
The thought of being used leaves a sour taste in my mouth, and while Roman promised he wasn't keeping me around for said connection to Maxim, I can’t escape the fact that it was the entire reason why he abducted me in the first place.
But if that is the case and Roman is playing even deeper games than he’s letting on, then why am I here? What is the real point of it?
Despite the happiness and excitement unfolding around me, I feel full of tension—wound up so tight that I might give out at any point.
Then, I feel a gentle nudge from Elena against my arm. She gives me a gentle smile. “Come with me…let’s go for a walk.”
I hesitate at first, but when I glance at Roman, he just nods.
Something about that is both vaguely nice and irritating, given how it was my first instinct to look toward him.
I shouldn’t feel the need to do that, but at the same time, I can’t help but think it could mean more than I’ve been letting myself believe.
The two of us slip away from the table and follow a path leading off the patio and back onto the ground. The gravel path guides us around the back of the restaurant and towards a sandy trail lined with a heavy rope fence.
It’s quiet out in the open space, with mountains off in the distance as the desert stretches beyond. And if things were a little different, I might’ve enjoyed that peace a bit more.
“You don’t need to try and hide anything from me, you know,” Elena says gently after a while, striding with me while the sky above us streaks with orange and pink hues. “I can tell something’s been eating at you all evening, even if you’re trying to look happy.”
Her words catch me off guard, feeling every second of how blunt yet vaguely caring they are. The breeze lightly tousles her deep brown hair, giving away just how thick it is.
I swallow hard, searching for any kind of excuse to pad the truth, but I sigh instead.
“I’m trying. I really am,” I admit, feeling more exposed than I anticipated while we pause on the quiet trail. “I can see how much all of this means to Roman and all of you…”
Elena’s expression softens, and she keeps quiet, allowing me to speak.
“But all of this has happened way too fast…I was a teacher just a couple of months ago, and now I’m a wife and a mother-to-be. And this lifestyle of his…I want to trust him, but I don’t know if I can fully. Not yet, anyway.”
Despite how the words come out painfully, feeling like a betrayal of sorts, Elena’s expression doesn’t show any kind of hurt.
“I understand, and I can’t imagine any of this has felt normal for you,” she offers lightly, continuing to walk down the path.
Nodding, I cross my arms over my chest to brush away the chill from my arms. “You’re right…it hasn’t. Some days it feels like a dream, others it’s a nightmare. I don’t know what to make of it.”
With careful consideration, Elena starts, “Roman’s not perfect, and as a family, I know we aren’t either. But I’ve never seen him love anything so easily.”
Surprised to hear it said so openly, my expression shifts involuntarily at that word. I haven’t even heard it from his mouth yet…but I’ve felt it, at least. She isn’t completely off base.
“It’s hard for him. Admitting to needing anyone or anything…
it has never come easy. He has always carried so much on his shoulders and rarely gave himself the chance to experience those kinds of attachments,” Elena continues, speaking so straight to the point that I know she means every word.
“But with you…so much has changed for him. I see him smiling more, considering his future beyond just us as a family. He’s been thoughtful, and finally thinking of something other than the family empire. ”
Her words sink into my skin all at once, overwhelming me with a sense of warmth and guilt.
I try to think of anything to say, but to hear how my presence in his life has changed and affected him…I’m speechless.
A gentle, considerate quiet settles between us before Elena lets go of a breath and glances at me with a small smile.
“It may be hard to see through the mess of everything he deals with, but you aren’t just something Roman wants, Victoria…you’re more to him than he could ever put into words. And the baby…he’s going to love them so fiercely. I can tell he already does.”
Shaken down to my core, heat floods my nose as tears prick at the corners of my eyes. Glancing down, I try to blink them away.
“I just…I don’t want to be a pawn,” I say quietly, struggling to pack away those lingering doubts and fears. “For Roman or Maxim.”
“You won’t be. Roman will never let that happen,” she hums, letting her smile pull further. “I damn well won’t let it happen either.”
As some of that pressing heaviness in my chest slowly dissolves, I manage a small, hopeful smile of my own. “I hope so…and thank you for always being there.”
“Of course. It’s not every day I’m given a sister-in-law,” Elena says, beaming even more. “My brothers may not be the smoothest when it comes to emotions, but I’m always here to help balance them out.”
Feeling touched and more reassured, I think about Roman and all the ways he’s been trying lately. How there’s a chance I just haven’t been letting myself feel enough of his intentions behind it all.
Just as that ease begins to fill my system, the snap of something nearby catches my attention.
We both fall silent, almost instinctively, and then there’s another sound. It’s almost sharper than the first time.
Spinning around, my heart nearly stops the moment I see them.
Across from us, two men seem to appear out of thin air, dressed head to toe in dark clothing. Even their faces are covered with masks.
They’re too close. Too focused on us.
I feel Elena’s hand on my arm while ice moves through my veins.
My stomach sinks, and I’m immediately back in the school parking lot, being surrounded. I can’t breathe.
“ Run .”
Like a prey animal, I don’t hesitate.
Elena shoves me down the trail, giving me a head start before she bolts in the opposite direction.
Immediately, there’s shouting and the crunch of boots from behind me, but I can only focus on the path ahead, leading back to the restaurant. To Roman.
My legs move as fast and hard as they can, but the loose ground makes it harder for me to maintain the traction I need.
With my pulse roaring in my ears, I try to push out the static in my head—the raw panic that makes my knees feel weaker than usual.
I force air in and out of my lungs, and as I spot the side of the patio layered with trimmed hedges and overgrown ivy, I lock onto it. I just need to get there.
My heart rate spikes as I feel the scrape of fingernails against my arm. A fumble.
Then, with a lurch forward, a hand catches my arm.
My breath hitches, and the grasp on me rips me sideways until I lose my footing.
I go to scream—to alert anyone nearby. Then something damp clamps over my mouth, forcing me to suck in a sickly sweet aroma that makes me cough.
That hold on me is rough and uncaring, and the chemicals in my senses tear me from the present.
Everything shifts into a blurry canvas, and then it all fades to nothing.