The Friendship #2
Kaid kept his promise. As Sato thawed the land, my thief returned as often as he could, silently slipping past every defense Hreinasta’s temple offered. He truly was blessed by Varas, worthy of the Great Thief himself.
Kaid broke into my room whenever Varas did not demand his services, and some nights he came to me full of vibrance and life.
Other times, the soot around his eyes had rubbed off.
His limbs were filled with exhaustion, his body colored by bruises.
Yet still, he came. He told me every story he owned.
He made me climb to the roof so we could see all of Szent as he whispered the holy city’s secrets.
The more we climbed, the stronger I grew, and we explored more, dropping into the gardens, balancing on the rafters, hiding in the alcoves.
Each night was an adventure, and while we never left the temple grounds, he showed me things about my home I’d never noticed.
Kaid lay beside me under the waning moon.
The sun would rise soon, and we were pushing our luck.
I’d yet to sleep. The priestesses would come for me in a few hours, but I couldn’t pull away.
It had been a month since he first encouraged me onto this roof, and something had changed between us.
He was no longer the forbidden stranger hiding in my room.
He was my life and breath and hope. My best friend, and it made my heart ache.
The only other person I’d been in close proximity to was my mother.
She cared for me in those ten cycles before the temple took me, but I don’t remember her possessing warmth like Kaid.
His affection bridges our physical distance, but my mother had none, even when she touched me.
Perhaps it was because she knew my future.
She knew the soul I’d lose to become Hreinasta’s.
Maybe she was afraid to grow attached, reluctant to love a child only to banish her.
Ever since Kaid barged into my life, I wondered if my father had pushed the offering on her.
His status centered him in the public eye, and many had shamed him for not pledging one of his children to a god’s service.
Had he given me to my mother just so that my sacrifice would appease the people?
I shook away the thought and twisted toward Kaid. He was so much larger than me, and the scar severing the left side of his mouth captured my attention.
“You can touch it.” He laughed, his smile shifting the uneven flesh. “If you wanted to, that is. I know you aren’t supposed to touch anyone, but you can touch me. Even if you never do, you have my consent. You’re safe with me.”
“I know,” I said as I rolled to my side, inching closer to his face. “But I can’t.”
He shrugged good-naturedly as he looked at me. “You always stare at it.”
“We can’t have scars,” I explained. My gaze shifted away from the disfigured skin in embarrassment. “If an acolyte or priestess becomes scarred, she is dismissed from service, so I’ve never seen one before, especially not like yours.”
“Look at me,” he commanded in a gentle tone, and my eyes dragged back to his handsome face. “Don’t be ashamed. I have nothing to hide from you.”
“Does it hurt?” I blurted before I could stop myself.
“It did. Gods, it did. But not anymore.”
“Is it the only one you have?”
“No, but Hreinasta would frown on us if I showed you those.”
I laughed, suddenly curious where on his sculpted body those blemishes hid, and he winked at me as if he knew exactly where my mind had gone.
“How did you get it?” I asked, trying and failing to force the blush from my cheeks.
“I…” He trailed off. “That’s not a story for you.”
“Why not?” I couldn’t stop the question from escaping.
“You…” He paused as if to organize his thoughts so he wouldn’t hurt me. “You are innocent, surrounded by beauty. Everything about you is lovely and kind and full of wonder. My story is ugly. I don’t want to stain you with my past. You don’t deserve that darkness.”
“Don’t,” I whispered. “Don’t do that. Don’t cut me out of your life because you think I can’t handle it.”
He looked at me with sorrow in his eyes. I hated it. I wanted to shake him, but I clenched my fists instead.
“I’m a person,” I begged. “Treat me like one.”
“Sellah…”
“I am not a thing.” I sat up, anger pulsing through me.
Not at him, but at how inhuman everyone made me feel until him.
“I am not empty, not yet. I’m still me, still a human.
Everyone else cut me out of their life. My parents.
My siblings. Even the other vessels, because they’re jealous of my station.
I’m a thing to everyone but you.” Tears threatened to spill down my cheeks.
“I feel real to you, so don’t turn me into an object to be admired and polished. Not yet.”
“Sellah, I…” He sat up and shifted closer until our shoulders almost touched. All I would have to do is lean, and we would be joined.
“My father was an important man in Szent. He still is.” Kaid surrendered the truth.
“But my mother was no one. Someone he used and threw out like trash. She died when I was a child, confessing on her deathbed whose seed had fathered me. She hoped if I went to him, he would take pity on his son and save me from poverty. She was wrong, and I’m glad she wasn’t alive to see it. ”
“He gave that to you?” I stared at his lips, his perfect lips with their long white scar that begged for my fingers.
“No.” He shook his head. “He turned me out onto the streets to fend for myself. I stole to survive, always destined to be a thief, I guess.” He chuckled without humor.
“When I was a teenager, still scrawny and lean, I stole from the wrong market vendor. I was too hungry to think straight and didn’t plan my actions.
It cost me. The vendor was a gargantuan man, and he caught me as I tried to escape with the food.
He…” Kaid trailed off and fingered his mouth.
“If it’s too painful for you, you don’t have to tell me.” I offered. “I only meant I didn’t want you to hide from me.”
“I want to tell you.” His expression swallowed me whole.
“I want you to know everything about me. I want you in every part of my being. You’re the only person I have.
” He blushed at the sad truth. “You’re the only friend I have.
The only person since my mother that cares whether I live or die, and I want you to know me. ”
I pressed my palm to the roof, dangerously close to his. “I would hug your pain away if I could,” I whispered.
“I would like that.” He flattened his hand so that our fingers were centimeters apart.
“The vendor pinned me to the ground, and I begged for my life. I was still a boy, a starving boy, and he was too heavy. I screamed for forgiveness. Plead my case with tears. I was hungry, so hungry, but he drew a knife from his belt saying, ‘Then I shall relieve you of your mouth’.”
Kaid’s fingers lifted and trailed over the long scar.
“He sliced through my lips. I think he meant to carve them off completely, but a stranger pulled him off me. He beat the man into the dirt, then left without a word. I followed my savior, bleeding and crying, to the House of Varas. It was the last time I saw The Great Thief until he officially welcomed me into his guild. I didn’t realize it, but it was the god himself who saved me from that vendor, and he told me if I was going to steal, I should do it properly. ”
Tears escaped my eyes, and I wiped them away before placing my hand back on the roof. The wetness stained the stone, and careful not to touch me, Kaid brushed his fingers over the teardrops.
“That’s why I strove to be the best. I longed to be worthy of Varas.
I didn’t know he’d been the one to save me until I offered him your dress, and he was there.
He saved me, and I wanted to be like him.
A thief and a warrior. Someone no one could hurt.
” He looked at me pointedly. “I have scars from those who tried, but as the cycles passed, less and less could wound me, but your tears? They hurt worst of all. Out of everyone in my life, you have the power to hurt me the most.”
“Why?” His words alarmed me.
“Because I finally found a soul that sings to mine, a friend unlike anyone I’ve ever met, and I made you cry. I can’t take you away from here. I cannot touch you, and in a cycle, I’ll lose you.”
His words reminded me of my mother. Was this why she held me at arm’s length? Kaid had thrown himself headlong into our connection, and he would emerge burned. I wouldn’t emerge at all, not for decades at least. My mother was smart. She saved herself from the pain.
“The sun is coming.” Kaid stood abruptly, signally our time was over.
“Will you come back?” I asked, suddenly afraid he would protect himself like my mother did, distancing himself from the misery of seeing my body without my soul inside it.
“Of course.” He smiled. Sad, but true. “I’ll even return when you’re old and grey and Hreinasta abandons you for another. It may take a while, but I’ll always come for you.”