The Request
I was in Kaid’s arms the second his tall frame pulled through my window, and it was liberating to touch him so freely.
He captured my waist, hoisting me off the floor as I hugged his neck, and I buried my nose against his throat.
I would never tire of his scent. Incense coated my skin from its constant burning in the inner sanctum, but Kaid smelled of freedom.
He smelled of the outdoors and sweat and the food he passed in the market, and it was my obsession.
“May I?” he asked as he lowered me to the ground, but he barely spoke the words before my mouth found his, his lips against mine in desperate hunger.
His chest was solid beneath my curves, so much stronger than I’d expected, and I couldn’t stop the soft moan that escaped me.
I hadn’t seen him in four days, not since our first kiss, and I felt his absence in every cell of my body.
“Sellah,” he whispered into my mouth like a prayer. “You’re so beautiful.” He set me down on the ground and brushed my flushed cheeks with his thumbs. “I know you hate being valued for only your appearance, but I love all of you. You’re still my best friend, but gods, you are perfect.”
“I missed you.” I smiled wide at his praise, noticing the customary ash was missing from his eyes.
“What happened?” My fingertips trailed over his temples.
I would never tire of the sensation of his skin against mine.
I could live forever in his arms and never grow tired of the fire he stoked within me.
“I washed my face.” He gripped my jaw with gentle ownership and leaned forward, kissing me until I saw stars.
“I wanted to kiss you and didn’t want my ashes to stain your skin…
well, I do.” He pulled back so I could see the tease in his gaze.
I’d never seen that expression before, and my cheeks flushed red at its meaning.
“I would love to mark you with my ashes, to form a path of my every touch over your body, but I won’t put you in harm’s way. ”
“Thank you.” I blushed at the image his words painted, and for a second, I allowed myself to imagine what I would look like bare, wearing only his ash stains.
“Stop,” he groaned, and I jerked free of my imagination. “I can read what you’re thinking, and I’m trying to exhibit control, but if you keep making that face, it will shred quickly.”
“I’m—” I started.
“Don’t you dare apologize. Never be sorry to me,” Kaid interrupted. “We’re just in unchartered waters. I love you, but I won’t take anything you can’t willingly give. Your situation…” His expression darkened. “I won’t compromise you.”
“You aren’t.” I cupped his jaw softly, forcing his gold-flecked eyes to mine. “I choose you, remember? I have no guilt or shame because you can’t compromise what belongs to you.”
“Sellah?” He gripped my hand, lacing his strong and calloused fingers through mine as he pulled me to a seat on the mattress.
“You can leave, right? I’ve heard of acolytes dissolving their pledges when they changed their minds.
You can renounce your vows and pledge to another god. It’s not against the law.”
There was such hope in his eyes that tears rose to my surface.
“No, it’s not against the law,” I whispered, forcing them down.
“But the claiming is soon. Hreinasta announced her intentions on me almost eleven cycles ago, and once she claims a vessel, there’s no undoing it.
She won’t let me go. I belong to her… my body does, at least.”
“So, if you renounced her tomorrow?”
“She cannot harm my body, but there are other ways to punish a person.”
Kaid flinched. “Have you seen that happen?”
“Once,” I nodded. “When I was fifteen, they caught a priestess alone with a man and made an example of her. She was in her forties, well past the age of a vessel, but even the priestesses must remain pure. Perhaps she was merely comforting the man. Perhaps they were old friends or family members, but all she did was touch his shoulder. The chains they used on her were padded so that they didn’t mark her beauty, but they tortured her mind for a month, and he was flogged for his sins.
The priestess returned after her thirty-day penance, but she was never the same.
Something had snapped inside her, and she died shortly after. ”
Kaid released my hand, pulling his fists into his lap, and I read fear in his rigid stance. We’d done more than that priestess, and the consequences of our actions terrified him.
“I shouldn’t be here.” He stood, but I captured his wrist with both my hands before he could run.
“She may not let me leave. She won’t allow me to renounce my devotion, but she cannot steal my mind. Hreinasta will consume my flesh, but this?” I pointed to my heart and then my head. “They’re mine, and they belong to you.”
“I don’t want her to punish you.” The heartbreak on his face was enough to rip me to shreds.
“She already has,” I answered solemnly. “She’ll inhabit me sooner than I’m ready for. I’ll disappear for decades. I’ve already been punished, so don’t deny me the only thing in this life that’s mine, and mine alone.”
Kaid turned around and knelt before me, his elbows digging into my thighs as he cupped my face.
“I won’t, I promise.” He kissed me reverently, worship in his touch as he remained on his knees.
“I don’t want to risk your safety, but I won’t be like your family or this temple.
From now until you disappear, every choice and decision are yours. Whatever they are, I’ll obey.”
“Then love me, Kaid.” My fingers laced through his hair. “Love me enough for a lifetime.”
He groaned, pushing further between my thighs until his chest pressed against mine. I gasped at the contact, my legs instinctively tightening around his ribs, and I drank every ounce of pleasure he offered me. The kiss was holy. It was destruction, and I burned in its desire.
“Sellah,” he moaned into my mouth before biting my bottom lip softly. “Did you mean it? Do you really want a lifetime of my love in these next weeks?”
“Yes.” I could barely speak as something foreign and wickedly delicious curled in my belly.
“Gods be damned,” he cursed. “I want to taste you.” He pulled away, holding my jaw firm as he studied my face, searching for hesitation, but I was his, body and soul. “Please let me kiss you the way you deserve.”
“Yes.” I nodded, and he must have read the resounding consent in my eyes because he gripped my chin harder and slammed his mouth back to mine.
The kiss was rough. Hungry and full of aching desperation.
He uncurled his fingers from around my face and placed them on my thighs, sucking my bottom lip between his teeth.
His calloused palms rubbed my legs for a moment as if to prepare himself, and then he settled on his heels.
With slow movements, he bunched up my skirt until the hem sat on my knees.
A shocked gasp escaped my mouth as his fingers brushed against my bare skin. No one had ever touched me there. No one other than myself had seen my legs since my childhood, and he stared mesmerized at my heaving chest.
“Do you want me to stop?” His deep voice was low and harsh, as if it struggled to escape his throat.
“Never.” It was the truth. I would never ask him to stop.
He smiled at my answer, his scarred lips so intoxicatingly beautiful, and he shoved my skirt up further to rest his palms on my bare thighs.
I felt drunk on his caress, and I swore the room was spinning, glowing, floating.
Or maybe I was the weightless one, my spirit soaring as my heart raced.
Kaid watched my chest heave at the sensation, and then he leaned forward as if unable to resist my gravity and kissed my clavicle.
“Remember.” His moving lips tickled. “I only take what you give willingly. You’re in control. Promise you’ll tell me if you need me to stop.”
“I promise.” I wrapped my arms around his neck, clutching him to my chest as I buried my nose in his hair. He responded to my tenderness with a soft kiss pressed against my flushed skin, dragging his lips down until they reached the top of my dress.
“Good girl.” He smiled like I’d granted his every wish and slipped his hands behind my thighs. In one swift movement, he hoisted me off the bed and slammed me against his chest. “You’re so beautiful. No one should be this perfect.”
My legs instinctively wrapped around his hips, our bodies so close, not even air could pass between us.
I gasped at the contact, pulling a groan from him at the sound, and he slid his hands further up my thighs, making it impossible for me to escape.
He didn’t kiss me. He simply held my gaze, watching my reaction.
“My goddess,” he growled, capturing my palm and shoving it against his thundering heart. “Do you feel what you’re doing to me?”
“Yes.” His roaring pulse forced a smile from my lips.
“Good.” He released my wrist, his hand returning to my thigh, and I thought I might pass out from the feel of him so dangerously close to my center. “I can’t wait any longer.”
He sank to the mattress, shifting me so that I straddled him.
His hands left my legs and slid up to my hips as his mouth captured mine.
His body was impossibly strong, every inch power and grace, but I could barely concentrate as he used my hips to yank me close.
I was na?ve and innocent, and the feel of him between my thighs made me want to scream.
Not in fear, though, never in fear, but in desperate desire.
I didn’t understand my body’s reaction, but I craved it all the same.
It was overwhelming, but I wanted to drown in it.
“Touch me,” Kaid demanded as he nipped at my lip. “I want your hands on me. I need to memorize your caress.”
I chose to ignore the heartbreaking reason behind his request and slid my palm up his chest. We were both fully clothed, and while I was curious to see how beautiful my thief was bare, I was thankful for the barrier.
The sensations were too great as my fingers found every hard line and soft curve of his form.
He was a work of art, a priceless jewel in my eyes, and I didn’t think I would survive anything more intense than this kiss.
“Open for me.” Kaid brushed his thumb against my mouth, and I pulled away in confusion.
I instantly regretted my movement because seeing his face undid me.
His expression was pure obsession, a devotion not even the gods experienced from their faithful, and he looked like he wanted to devour me, body and soul.
“Come here,” he coaxed, realizing he needed to guide my movements.
He kissed me gently before continuing. “Open for me, goddess. I want to taste you.” His tongue licked the seam of my mouth, and I couldn’t stop the obscene moan that escaped me.
Kaid smirked against my lips before slipping his tongue against mine, and I froze at the foreignness of his affection.
I’d seen my parents kiss in the courtyard below my room as a child, so I understood the concept, but this? This felt dangerous, and I wanted more.
I fumbled through the movements, but Kaid graciously guided me. His tongue explored every inch of my mouth, pulling pleasure from me I didn’t know existed, and I tentatively brushed my tongue against his, savoring the exhilaration.
Kaid cursed violently at my touch and wrapped his arms around my waist. His control evaporated, and my sweet and gentle thief disappeared with it.
His kiss turned primal, and I surrendered to it.
I let him take everything with that kiss, and within minutes we were sweating and moaning and writhing together.
Desire fueled us, but beneath the passion, beneath the arousal, was a love forceful enough to alter my destiny.
Our romance wasn’t based on lust, but friendship.
I’d spent seasons learning every fiber of this man’s being, growing to trust and care for him, and even though his longing was thick between my thighs, it was his love that undid me.
He bit my lip and pulled away with a proud smirk, both of us realizing we were in danger of plunging off the edge.
Part of me wanted to protest his departure, but I recognized his control was for my sake.
I detested his discipline, but he knew my body almost better than I knew myself.
Kaid’s care was absolute, and he understood I needed to process my emotions, to calm my racing heart, and think through my decision.
With a sweet kiss on my cheek, he pushed me back until I sat on his knees.
We were still touching, but I could no longer feel his arousal, and my pulse calmed.
“I love you so much, Sellah.” He stared into my eyes. “You’ve ruined me. I’ll never be the same.”
“Neither will I,” I whispered.
“Did you like it?” He traced my lips with his thumb, and I nodded emphatically as I kissed his fingers. “It wasn’t too much for you? I don’t want to frighten you, but I lose myself in your presence.”
“Your tongue?” I asked, my embarrassment flooding my cheeks, and he laughed at my bright coloring. “Is that… Is that something lovers normally do?”
“It is.” He brushed my hair behind my ear. “The tongue can do many things. Things I wish I had the time to show you.”
“Don’t.” I pressed my hand to his mouth, silencing him. “Not tonight. Can we pretend my future doesn’t exist tonight?”
“I’ll do anything for you, you know that.”
“Good. Then love me and forget my fate for a few hours. I want a lifetime of your kisses before the dawn sends you away.”
He wrapped his arms around my shoulders, and I let myself imagine a life where I didn’t disappear. Where I could leave and spend every night in Kaid’s arms. I wanted him to show me all he could do with his tongue. I wanted to see him bare and feel him between my thighs. I wanted a future.
“I could live forever in your embrace and die an old man between your legs,” Kaid whispered my own thoughts out loud, yanking me closer now that my heart rate had calmed. “Tell me truthfully, did you really like that kiss? I know it shocked you, but don’t pretend on my account.”
“I loved it.” I peppered tiny kisses all over his jaw until he laughed. “It was surprising, but kissing you is better than I imagined.”
“Then may I do it again?”
“You can do it all night,” I teased, and he granted my wish, kissing me so hard my lips bruised.