Chapter 44
Vincent da Silva
Exhausted. I lowered to a knee on the mattress, fell into my palms, and slid them forward, stretching my torso as I plopped to my stomach.
Only feeling a tinge of pain, I released an elongated groan and closed my eyelids.
Years of self-oppression lifted from my shoulders, I felt a hundred pounds lighter, as if I could float away.
Until the confession came out and my sister accepted it, I had never realized just how chained I’d been all these years.
Having the burdened relieved left me completely zapped of energy.
The mattress shifted with added weight, so I peeked over my bicep and grinned, my heart swelling. Dash was lying down, slowly, his arm holding his stomach. Hissing through his teeth, he settled on his back, rolling his head to look at me.
“It’s crazy how sometimes, I barely feel the pain and others, it feels like the first day. Kinda sick of this shit,” he snorted, lifting his head to fluff the pillow.
We shared a quiet chuckle, the atmosphere light, the house quiet.
“Sounds like you finally got her to sleep.”
A palm rubbed over his face with a deep groan. “Jesus, Vin. I ain’t never seen her this fucking wired. We gotta do something to make sure bitch wants to stay because I don’t think Piera can handle another separation from them kids.”
I snickered, lifting my chin to my bicep. “What the hell can we do?”
The arm closest me folded under his head, the other splaying over his stomach. Those fingers fanned out and laid back down. “Dunno. Maybe we can find a nice chunk of land where he can have all his animals. What’s he got, anyway?”
“I dunno. Cows, horses, goats? I think some chickens?”
“Shit. Well, we’ll figure out something.” He rolled his head to peer at me with a small smile. “You and Tiny talked a long goddamn time when she called you back after dinner.”
My pulse fluttered with absolute adoration. My sister was fucking remarkable. She always considered me her hero, but the feeling was quite mutual. No one could hold a candle to Violetta.
“Yeah, we went through a lot of things.”
“Billy?” he asked quietly.
My smile fell and grief overwrought my system in the blink of an eye.
Turning my face back into the mattress, I heaved a long sigh.
I still couldn’t believe he was gone. More than once, I’d caught myself checking my cellphone, looking for his texts.
There would never be another new one, the last was the one telling me about his wife leaving for the weekend.
Dash grunted in pain to roll to his side, his arm sliding across my back. “It’s okay to mourn him and still love me, you know that, right?”
I peeked over my bicep once more, my insides shrinking. “That obvious, huh?”
One side of his face scrunched. “Good thing about becoming lovers after over a decade of friendship. I know you.” He sighed, petting from the top of my head, down my back, over and over. “I still miss Mary sometimes.”
That had me a little worried, my stomach flipping over. “There’s a big difference, Dash. That’s a woman, your wife, when you’ve been a homophobe your whole life.”
He scooted closer, the arm beneath him rising to rest that hand on the other shoulder. “Don’t matter who she was, Vin. It matters what I feel. What you make me feel.”
My breaths shallowing, my mouth ran dry. “And what do I make you feel?”
A long, slow breath puffed out his nostrils to fill his lungs. Holding it a moment, he sighed it out on a whispered reply. “In a nutshell, whole.”
That response had my chest fluttering, but the doubt tamped it down before it got out of hand. There was always a hitch; somewhere, some time, there would be an ah ha moment when everything came crashing down. History proved it was nearby. “Things are about to get tense, though.”
“Yeah, yeah, I know.”
“When we stand in front of the Serpents, and The Boss tells them I am going to be the new leader and that we’re together, are you going to flake out on me?”
A muscle in his jaw flexed. “No.”
“Dash, everyone knows you hate gay people. Hell, most of them have made hateful jokes right along with you. In fact.” I sat up on my elbows, my hands clasped, to look down, anger rising.
“If I recall correctly, one of the reasons I took the fall for you was because you was already on probation for beating up a gay couple. They wasn’t doing nothing but holding hands and walking down the street and you and Sam jumped them. ”
He huffed and rolled to his back, his arm under his head again, that other hand tapping his chest. “Yeah, I know.”
“So, when we stand in front of sixty men and women and Boss tells them you are now gay, are you gonna flake or are you gonna take a stand?”
He tipped his head to the side to glare, his lips taut. “I ain’t running from nothing. I never have, I never will.”
A glimmer of hope trickled through my veins. “And when they ask how you, the most hateful homophobe in the group, is suddenly gay, what’re you gonna say?”
One side of his mouth lifting, he said, “I’m gonna tell them the truth. You edged me for almost a month, broke me down, and had me begging for that gorgeous dick like a fucking simp and now I’m hooked.”
For a moment, I had no words, just stared. Snorting, I bowed my chin and cradled my forehead. “Jesus, Dash. Don’t fucking tell them that.”
“Why not? It’s true.”
“Because it makes me sound like I fucking preyed on you, and I don’t think that’s a good look this soon after Jackyl.”
Though his smile faltered at the mention of his name, he maintained the light mood. “You kinda didn’t give me a chance to say no, Vin.”
Arching a brow, I leaned into the elbow closest him and whispered, “And when you slip me benzos to ride my dick, are you giving me the chance to say no?”
He turned ghostly white, eyes bulging, jaw gaping. Sheening with perspiration, he was panting heavily, panic rising in his dark eyes.
“Didn’t think I knew about that, huh?”
“I-I-I-I-I…”
Wrinkling my nose, I lowered my voice even further and said, “It gets me so fucking hot when I wake up and find your cum on me, Dario. On me and in me. By all means, don’t stop. Just…try recording it next time so I can at least see it when I wake up.”
Doing a doubletake, his head jerked off the pillow, his jaw falling further. “What the fuck?”
I winked and laid back down, peeking at him over my arm. “You heard me. I think it’d be hot as hell to fuck you while watching a video of you fucking me while I was passed out.”
“Jesus, I fucking love you, dude.”
Startled, I shot back to my elbows, my turn to gawk. “Don’t fucking say it unless you mean it, Dario!” I blasted, frantic.
Slowly pushing up to his fist, his leg bending to ease the pressure on his lower stomach, he cupped the back of my neck and pulled me, so our foreheads were together. “You think I’d say it if I didn’t mean it?”
Rattled to the core, I was shaking everywhere, my stomach spinning, my heart banging into my ribs. “Please,” I croaked, shaking my head. Images of Billy filling my thoughts, I muttered, “Don’t say it unless you mean it. I…I can’t go through that again. Not again. Please.”
He clucked his teeth and rolled his eyes, lying back down and pulling me with him. Curling against his side, my cheek on his chest, he was petting my head, neck and shoulder, our other hand twining together. Bringing them to his mouth, he kissed my knuckles.
“With how much I used to fear gayness, you really think I’d say those words if I didn’t mean them?
I love you, Vin. I really do. I wouldn’t be here, in your bed, in your home, wanting to raise my kid with you if I didn’t.
” He craned his neck to press his lips to my forehead, his voice barely above a whisper.
“I wouldn’t take that stand with you in front of all the Serpents this weekend. ”
I sat up a bit to stare at him in the darkness, my mind too afraid to accept this reality. I’d fooled myself too many times over the years with Billy, could I really take that leap of faith and believe in Dash?
A smile broke across his features, his thumb wiping the corner of my eye to knock away a loose lash. “And if things go sideways, despite The Boss, I’m ready to get on that jet and disappear with you forever.”
Emotions overwhelming me, I shook my head in disbelief. “How did this happen?”
“I dunno but I ain’t all too upset about it. I mean, think about it, babe. This was all way too easy. Me and you, my body training to take that fantastic dick. I mean, that tiny hole practically spread wide open like a two dollar whore for that cock. Barely hurt, at all.”
I snorted but continued to ogle in astonishment.
“Moving in here with you, acorn accepting us, Tiny accepting us. The Boss!” he chortled, shrugging his arm while still clinging to my hand. “All so goddamn easy. It has to mean it was meant to be, right?”
My heart stuck in my throat, I faintly nodded. “I think so. I mean, I like to believe so.”
“Yeah, me, too,” he sighed, kissing our knuckles once more. “Now, it’s a little too soon to be making official plans, but I kinda wanna talk about what bitch said earlier.”
My brows furrowing, I pouted. “What?”
“Us getting married one day.”
A zap of electricity shot straight through my core, sending an explosion that spread through every nook and cranny of my soul. Breathless, I gawked for a good fifteen seconds, fully expecting this to all be a dream and I was about to wake up.
“I think, because of acorn, you’re kinda gonna need to take my last name because if I take yours, we’re gonna have to change hers, too, and—”
I swept down, crushing my lips to his and thrusting my tongue into his mouth. He grunted but eagerly kissed me back, letting go of my hand to hold the back of my head. He groaned, his touch traveling lower to tuck into my sweats and cup a bare ass cheek.
Needing air in my lungs, I broke away, but left our lips touching, our noses together. My eyelids remaining closed, I whispered, “I love you so much, Dario.”
He groaned and pulled me closer. “Say that when you’re inside me, baby. Show me how much you love me.”
The room spinning around me, I crawled on top of him and settled between his thighs, in no rush for actual sexual contact.
Right now, it was enough to hold, touch, kiss, taste, knowing he loved me.
He loved me! He wasn’t going to hide me and pretend we weren’t together.
He wasn’t going to start a whole entire life for the public and keep me a secret.
We were going to face the Serpents and tell them we were in love.
It would eventually reach the ears of rival gangs who were going to think that made us weak and want to test the boundaries Jackyl, and I had laid down years ago.
It was going to cause a complete upheaval in our world.
But it didn’t matter because he was openly accepting me.
We were going to live a normal life, get married, raise Piera together.
So, it didn’t really matter what hell we were about to face because at the end of the day, we were taking a stand, together, and no one was going to be able to knock us down or break us apart.