Quinn #4
Tobias shrugged. “I wasn’t about to confront you about it, but I was curious.
From there, it was as simple as spending time in my parents’ library and researching uncommon forms of magic much like you did.
It didn’t take me long. I found a whole book on bodily magics, blood magic, and the so-called corruption of the healing arts.
” He raised a single brow. “You might want to borrow it when this is over. Though it got into how blood magic has been used for evil, it also included excerpts from some ancient texts. Did you know those who could wield blood like water used to be renowned healers a few millennia ago?”
“Until some fae used those teachings to steal the blood of those they wanted to control, and the practice of all blood magic was banned after their reign of terror,” I recited, then made a derisive sound. “Did you think you outresearched me, Maris?”
Tobias’s answering smile was bright, if fleeting. “You’d be surprised. I spend most of my time reading lately, learning about the magic of this realm. Learning about everything I missed, really.”
“Then you’ll know that those with my power didn’t use it to heal,” I said darkly. “They used it to make this world worse, and they were eradicated for it. Not just killed but entirely drained of their blood to be certain there was no coming back.” My laugh was forced. “There is no cure for me.”
“You don’t need to be cured of your magic, Sagray,” Tobias said with a flicker of outrage. “It’s part of you.”
It was the exact opposite of what I had expected. I had been so certain this would be the breaking point, the moment everything fell apart. And yet, instead of shattering our fragile friendship like glass, it was like a fog clearing from a mirror—showing me what had been there all along.
“And you don’t…” I swallowed hard. “You don’t hate me for using the very magic that—”
“There’s nothing that could ever make me hate you, Sagray.
” The finality in his voice was almost wistful—as if he had tried and knew the futility of it.
“You comparing the magic that saved us to how Aviel perverted it is the real travesty here. Maybe blood magic is considered evil by association because of what it had been used to do, but that doesn’t mean I think that magic itself is inherently wrong.
And in your hands?” His voice dropped, low and deliberate. “I’d love to see you unleashed.”
He crooked his finger beneath my chin, lifting gently. My mouth closed with a snap, my knees nearly buckling beneath me.
“I’m glad you finally felt comfortable enough to tell me though,” Tobias continued, effortlessly nonchalant. “Have you been using blood magic to help your research?”
It took a second before I could respond. “Yes. It’s not much different manipulating the blood in someone’s body versus the blood in a test tube. But with the stigma against it…the expectation it will be used for evil…I didn’t even tell Eva.”
He tilted his head inquisitively, the gold flecks in his eyes glinting in the midday sun. “You didn’t tell anyone?”
“I told Pari,” I conceded. “She saw what I was reading and…well, she’s the one who told me not to mention it to anyone else.
That doing so could reflect badly upon me, and the work we’ve done in Soleara.
” I cringed at the memory. “You should’ve seen her face when I told her, like she was worried I could be the next False King. ”
Even months later, I could still picture it—and the wave of shame I felt at her judgement.
In a single sentence, I had been reduced to that solitary part of me, despite all that time we had spent working together side by side.
“I’ve been meaning to tell Eva, but it never seemed like the right time to bring back the trauma of what blood and magic can do.
Now, I wish I hadn’t been such a coward. ”
There had always been an excuse not to tell her, especially with Eva perpetually busy in her new role as High Queen.
She was exhausted from the rebuilding efforts, then her bonding ceremony, and didn’t need me to add to her stress.
And she would’ve told Bash, who I could only assume had his own prejudices against blood magic.
Most of all, I hadn’t wanted it to change anything between us. The longer I took to tell her, the harder it became to do so.
Eva had lived through some of the worst of what blood magic could do. And here I was, able to literally control the blood in her veins.
“You’re many things, but never that, Sagray,” Tobias gently admonished me.
“You can tell Eva how you used it to save her when she wakes up if you need to balance the scales. But I have a feeling our High Queen will be able to tell the difference in intent rather than condemning you for a magic you were born with. Knowing her, she’ll go on a campaign to change the rest of this realm’s minds about blood magic too. ”
He was probably right. I could practically picture Eva’s outrage that I hadn’t told her sooner, and her reaction to anyone who thought less of me for it. If I ever wanted to know her actual reaction though, it was past time for me to get back to her cure.
“You’re right,” I said simply. “I should’ve given her…given you both more credit. I’m sorry.”
“If you feel the need to make it up to me, I’ll take a promise that you won’t wander off without me again.” His tone was almost cavalier, but I could hear the underlying worry. “That you’ll wait for me next time.”
My laugh was barely more than a loud exhale.
“Deal,” I whispered.
Leaning my head against Tobias’s shoulder, I let him lead us through the sunny streets, feeling safe in his arms.