E I G H T
I am dead on my feet when I get back to my apartment after pulling a near double. I’m getting delirious to the point that I think I can smell coffee brewing as I unlock my apartment.
“There you are!”
My heart practically jumps out of my skin when I find my brother and Charlie standing in my kitchen.
“What the hell?” I clutch my door, sucking in a hard lungful.
“Made this for you,” Kai grins, producing a steaming cup of coffee.
Guess I haven’t totally lost it yet.
“Why are you in my apartment?” I slam the door. “When he has a perfectly good one upstairs.” I point at Charlie before starting to unravel my layers.
“We’re going out.”
“No,” I tell Kai. “The only place I am going is to my bed,”
I kick off my shoes, spinning around.
“Charlie told me you haven’t had a break in a while,” my wonderful brother says. “I know you’re tired but nothing a shot won’t fix.”
Charlie’s arms cross his gray flannel-covered chest, a sly smirk threatening to show itself. He’s amused by this whole thing .
“Charlie would know that I don’t find going out relaxing.”
“He did say that,” Kai nods. “But he won’t go unless you do, so you’re going.”
“No.”
My brother’s eyes narrow as he scrunches his face at me like he used to when we were children and ready to go to war.
“Go out with him,” I mutter to Charlie.
“Just one drink,” he innocently replies.
“One,” Kai echoes.
“It’s never just one drink with you, Kai.”
“I’ll smoke a joint. If I’m high I won’t drink as much.”
I gawk at his logic.
“Look, we’ll go outside while you change. Fifteen minutes tops,” Kai rattles. “Drink this.” He nudges the mug. “You’ll feel like you took a power nap.”
My gawk falls into a death stare as my brother has the nerve to smirk and then ruffle my hair as he reaches for the door.
“Coming?”
“I’ll be down in a minute.” Charlie waves him off.
My head rolls down my neck as the door shuts, attempting to release some of the tension from a long day.
“He misses you.”
“It hasn’t been that long since I saw him.”
I reluctantly reach for the coffee.
“You guys have lived together basically all your lives,” Charlie reminds me. “Don’t fault him for wanting to spend time with his sister.”
“Our ideas of spending time together are very different. ”
“I’d paint my nails if that’s what it took to spend some time with Carsyn.”
“I thought nails were too far?” I purse my lips.
Charlie tenderly snickers. “Just one drink.”
“I really am exhausted, Charlie.”
“I know. I’ll make sure you get to bed.”
I roll my eyes, taking a sip.
I changed out of my scrubs, but I drew a line at anything tight or denim. I also threw my hair into a bun that looked more like a bird’s nest than hair.
It’s a weekday, so Harlem’s is a bit more tame than it usually is. We grabbed a table, which I shrugged out of my puffer, revealing an oversized long sleeve that hung over my body like a blanket. Kai went to get a pitcher because I wasn’t kidding when I said it’s never just one. It’s blackout or bust.
“You’re going to need to change that in a day or two again.” I nod at Charlie’s hand, resting on top of the table.
“I’ll get to it.”
“You’re sort of the worst patient ever, you know that?” I huff.
“I’m not so bad. I think the nurse has a sweet spot for me anyway.”
“What makes you think that?”
“A hunch,” Charlie smiles and I can’t help but roll my eyes at him.
Kai returns with a tower of glasses, but shamelessly drinks from the pitcher before setting it down.
“Come play some pool,” Kai says to Charlie .
Charlie glances at me as Kai pours us each a glass. His face is neutral, but I can tell he’s silently asking me as if he needs permission.
Kai notices. “C’mon, bro, just one game. Banks is fine for twenty minutes.”
Charlie doesn’t waver, continuing to look at me.
“You put a curse on him or something, sis?” Kai taunts. “He’s always at your side like a little puppy.”
“Maybe I’m just cooler than you, Kai.” I tip my glass to my lips.
“Better her bitch than yours, Matsumara.” Charlie does the same before he stands.
Kai laughs. “You got a thing for my sister, Barnes?”
“You going to put your money where your mouth is and play some pool?”
Kai’s hands raise in surrender. “Loser buys next round.”
“Guess you better keep your wallet open.”
Charlie peers over his shoulder at me for a beat, but I look away, telling him to go. I don’t need a babysitter. I would love to be anywhere else right now, but it wouldn’t kill me to sit here for a bit.
My cheeks pinch as the beer hits my tongue for the second time. People say it’s an acquired taste, but who in their right mind wants to acquire the desire to drink carbonated sewer water?
I twirl my phone around a few times, thinking about dipping into my endless Kindle options, but that’s not all that appealing either. The only thing that does appeal to me is sleep.
The pool tables were visible from where I sat, and it took about five minutes for me to realize that one game of pool was going to take much longer than expected. It might have something to do with the shots, but my guess is it had more to do with the two girls that brought them over.
My man whore of a brother is immediately distracted, and I’m able to count ten minutes between two turns that he took to entertain the girls. Soon the bolder of the two is running her fingers across Charlie’s bandage. No doubt asking what happened, cooing over him.
“Hey, are you waiting on someone?”
My own attention is demanded by a trio, seltzers in hand. I can easily tell which one is the hype girl, which one would fight me if I said yes, and which one got her heartbroken—recently judging by her tear-stained eyes.
I stare at the boys one more time, both immersed in conversation before I reach behind me for my coat.
“No.” I nod at the empty seats. “Go ahead.”
“We don’t want to kick you out,” the heartbroken one attempts to say without a hiccup.
“No worries.” I stand, tugging on my sleeves. “You can have the pitcher if you want,” I offer. “Or dump it out, I won’t be offended.”
I don’t wait for a reply before I sneak through the few bodies blocking the exit and out to the street.
I shove my hands into my pockets and start walking back, despite Kai telling me to never do this many times.
I’m about halfway when I decide to send one of them a text, aiming to stop any search party they may dispatch when they realize I’m missing. If they’ve realized.
I use the light I’m stopped at as an opportunity to pull out my phone. It would be red long enough for me to type out a text, and then I could hurry home to get out of the cold .
Charlie is the most recent in my messages, so I send one to him, quickly shoving my phone back into my pocket.
The sound of a window rolling down to my right doesn’t really catch my attention till a voice carried out of it.
“Hey!”
My eyes fall on the sedan, likely an early 2000’s Honda.
I don’t engage as the light turns and I expect them to drive off as I cross the parallel street.
“Hey, sweetheart!”
The car moves slowly, attempting to pace me as I refuse to look its way. I attempt to find solace with the sidewalk and parked cars between myself and the sedan, hoping it will grow bored with no reaction and drive away.
“Don’t be like that! Give me a smile!”
My insides start to sour as I am forced to stop at the next intersection and so does the car. The passengers shout a bit more as I wrap my fingers around each of my keys that sit in my coat pocket. Worse case these idiots are going to follow me all the way to my building, but I would want to get inside as fast as possible. You need a key to get into the building, so once inside they wouldn’t be able to follow.
If I ran the remaining distance, it might escalate the situation, so I try to stay calm. My phone buzzes in my other pocket, but I don’t make any move to look at it. I’m not looking at the car following me, but all I feel is its presence. I can see the movement out of the corner of my eye, hear the tires slowly turn against the pavement, and feel their eyes hunting me.
My body keeps vigilance while my brain rationalizes. These guys are being assholes, but any move I make that might encourage them in some way is within my power and I won’t do that. I won’t give them a reason to further antagonize me.
“SWEETHEART!”
I just have one more corner. One more corner to turn, and I would be less than two hundred feet from my building.
My entire body thrusts when the horn sounds, freezing all of my bodily functions.
“We just want to talk, sweetheart, please!” comes after the honk and a few chuckles.
I must force my feet to keep moving when they feel paralyzed. My lungs won’t contract when all I want to do is scream.
The last light turns red, and I have to stop again.
They continue to yell at me but soon the only thing I can truly hear is my heart pounding in my ears.
My mind sprinted through scenarios of what may unfold, if they got out of the car, if I could get my phone out fast enough, if I could fight them off if they tried to drag me into the car.
“SWEETHEAR–”
“Get the fuck out of here!”
My neck snaps at that voice.
Standing between me and the car is a leaning body, reaching inside the window. The horn honks repeatedly as a bit of a tussle occurs.
It takes my brain too long to recognize what I’m witnessing. It’s not till the car is speeding off, and he whips around.
His jaw was unhinged, a scrape of blood across the top of his wrapped knuckles, and his stocky body made a B-line right for me.
“Are you okay? Banks? Talk to me, are you okay? ”
My sight had glazed over for just a moment, his hands on my shoulders pulled me from the daze.
“Banks?!”
He nearly rattles my entire nervous system.
“What the hell were you thinking? Walking back on your own like that?”
I inhale, my ice-cold lungs fighting against the air as I finally look him in the eye. A crazed worry rested there, slowly mixing with anger.
“Did you just…” I can barely speak.
“Don’t you see how bad that could have been?” He ignores me altogether. “Had I not been literally sprinting after you—”
“Did you just punch them?” I blink up at him, still processing.
“They were harassing you,” Charlie barks. “Of course, I fucking punched them.”
“You shouldn’t have done that.”
Charlie’s hold on me falls. “What?” he gasps with skepticism.
“You escalated an already scary situation.”
“Are you serious right now?”
I finally pull my hands from my pockets, realizing that they are trembling.
Charlie sees it and softens, pulling me to him. He wraps his arms around my shaking body.
“I want to go home,” the whisper comes out more like a sob. “I didn’t even want to come out tonight.”
He sighs against my hair as he holds me .
We stay close as we finish the walk back to our building. Charlie purposely positioned himself between the street and me.
My hands still shake as I attempt to unlock my apartment. He steadies my hand and helps me open the door.
“Do you want me to stay?”
My keys clink against the counter as I drop them and unzip my puffer.
“I think I should stay.”
My back is to him as I shut my eyes and take a few deep breaths.
I’m okay.
He’s okay.
“I’ll be fine.”
“Banks…”
“I just need some rest, Charlie.” I kick off my shoes. “I’m fine.”
“We need to talk about what just happened.”
I swallow the weight in my throat before looking over my shoulder at him. His head hanging low between his own.
“Not tonight.”
He gnaws on his lip.
“I just—I need to sleep.”
Every molecule in his body wants to press me, but his light eyes recognize something in mine and—he folds, heading for the door. “I just wanted to protect you.”
I know that’s true, but violence isn’t the answer.
And I’m so infuriated that I let them convince me to go out to begin with. Had I done what I wanted, I would be sound asleep, and it would have never happened .
Even as I lock my door and bolt the chain, my fingers still buzz with adrenaline. No sleep would come tonight, regardless of my exhaustion.