Chapter 27 Mabel
MABEL
I can’t stop smiling.
I can’t recall a thing my band said at breakfast. Sound check went by in a blur. All I can think about is Aurora. How she tastes. How she sounds when she comes. How she feels under my palms.
I’m a woman obsessed, and I don’t even care. I’ve lost all good sense, but this giddy excitement is addicting. I’m literally counting down the seconds until I’m alone with her again.
“Rossi, pull your head out of the clouds, for fuck’s sake.”
I snap my attention up from my phone screen and blink at my manager. His eyebrow is arched, and his lips are pursed. It’s a look I’ve seen many times, just never directed at me.
“What?”
“Did you hear a word I just said?”
“No.”
“Are you ill?”
I blink, and my brows furrow. “Am I what?”
“You’re not my problem child, Rossi, so either you’re ill, or it’s time for me to retire.”
I blink again as I process his statement. I can feel my band’s eyes on me, but I keep mine on Hammond as I slowly raise my hand to my mouth and fake a cough.
“I’m sick.”
He’s unamused, and I watch as he pulls his phone from his pocket, makes a call, and barks an order to whoever is on the other end.
“Rossi needs cough drops.”
He hangs up, slides his phone back into his pocket, and hits me with another arched brow.
“Anything else?”
I shake my head. “Nope. Thanks, Dad.”
He doesn’t acknowledge me again, and I do my best to pretend to listen to what he’s saying about calendars, show times, and set lists.
We’re filming all seven Sydney shows, and we have another fan meet and greet before the show tomorrow night.
This is all stuff I already know, but Hammond is nothing if not thorough, and I don’t make the mistake of looking at my phone again.
By the time our manager dismisses us, my phone has buzzed multiples times with texts, and I’m dying to see if they’re from Aurora. Instead, though, I’m cornered by a suspicious looking Sav, and my hackles rise.
“You guys coming to grab food with us?” Jonah asks, but Sav doesn’t look away from me as she answers.
“No. We’ll order something.”
I break my stare off with Sav to look at Jonah and Torren. They’re both smirking.
“What?” I spit.
“It’s just nice to see the golden child get in trouble, is all,” Torren says with a laugh.
“Good thing, too. Can’t have Ham thinking we’ve gone easy on him,” Jo adds, and I roll my eyes.
“You are literally asleep by 10 p.m. every night there isn’t a show, and you’ve replaced liquor with ginger tea.”
Torren snorts a laugh, so I whip my attention to him.
“And you’re just as boring, Mr. Newspaper and Black Coffee at 5 a.m. You’re one pair of white sneakers away from a lawn care routine. Easy is an understatement.”
“Exactly,” Torren says, ignoring my weak jibe as he heads to the door. “That’s why we’re glad you’re taking up the torch.”
“If you need help on how to be the problem child, Mabes, I got you covered,” Jo says.
I flip them both off and keep my middle fingers up until the door shuts behind them.
“We need to talk.”
I turn my attention back to Sav and try to act unbothered by her cold tone. “Okay. Talk.”
She leaves the exec suite without another word, so I release a loud, dramatic, Sav Loveless-coded sigh that she doesn’t acknowledge as I reluctantly follow her.
We don’t speak as we weave through the halls, and I don’t bother catching up to her. I drag my feet and lag despite it being childish. I don’t know what she wants—probably to assault me with more nosy questions—but I’m in no hurry to find out.
As we approach the dressing room though, I grow nervous.
I hate lying to Sav. I hate having to dodge these conversations.
Keeping a secret from your best friend is so fucking hard, and I hate doing it.
I hate it so much. I’m so far in my own head, that when we walk through the door, I don’t see her stop in front of me until I’m running smack into her.
“Fuck, Sav.” I step back and rub my forehead. “What the hell?”
“Oh, sorry. You must have been too busy daydreaming about Ham’s niece to see me.”
I can feel the blood drain from my face until I’m sure I’m white as a sheet. The reaction is all the confirmation Sav needs, and she flings a finger in my direction.
“I fucking knew it. I knew it! Jesus, Mabes, what the actual fuck are you thinking? She’s not just Ham’s niece, she’s married! Married!”
I clamp my eyes shut. I know she’s right. Fuck, I know it. I just don’t want to admit it.
“How did you know?”
“I could tell she was into you from the beginning. I just didn’t think you’d fucking act on it. But then you got all crush-faced and spacey, and you both started disappearing at the same time, so it wasn’t hard to put two and two together. Please tell me you’re just hanging out.”
I don’t respond to her last sentence and instead blurt out the first thing that comes to my head. “What do you mean you could tell she was into me?”
Sav pinches the bridge of her nose. “For fuck’s sake, Mabel.”
“What do you mean, Savannah?”
She glares at me, but I wave my hands, signaling for her to spit it the fuck out because I am dying to know. She caves, thank God.
“She literally stalked you with her eyes every time you were in a room together. I’m sure she thought she was subtle, but—”
“But you noticed because you’re a fucking annoying, nosy, pain in the ass?”
“Oh, shut up. You’re not mad at me. You’re just mad you got caught.”
I groan and throw myself on the couch. She’s not wrong, and I hate it.
“Please tell me it hasn’t gone further than hanging out. You haven’t crossed any physical lines, right?”
I can’t tell her what she wants to hear, so I drop my head between my knees and say nothing. She releases a groan that mimics mine, then the couch dips as she plops down next to me.
“Okay,” she says on a defeated sigh. “Okay. At least tell me it was just physical, and you haven’t actually caught feelings. Just a harmless crush. Right? We can work with a harmless crush.”
I want to tell her that. I want it to be true so badly, but I know myself better than that. I’ve definitely fallen for Aurora, and there’s no point in lying. Sav would see right through me anyway.
When I don’t speak up, the back of the couch bounces because she’s dramatically thrown herself into it, and when I look at her, she’s staring at the ceiling.
We sit in the quiet for what feels like an hour, and when she finally breaks the silence, her voice has a morose tone that makes my whole body deflate.
“I just don’t want you to get hurt, Mabes. I want whatever you want, but I honestly cannot picture an outcome that doesn’t end in you getting your heart shattered.”
I close my eyes again and lean back into the couch beside her. My eyes well with tears, but I don’t let them breech my lashes. It won’t help anything.
“I know,” I whisper. And I do know. I’ve just been avoiding it. I’ve been lying to myself by refusing to take off the metaphorical rose-colored glasses. “I shouldn’t have let this happen. I know that. But, God, Sav, I just...”
I trail off and shake my head.
How do I say this without sounding like an idiot? Without coming off as a completely na?ve fool? I should have known better. I should have been more careful. I never should have let it get this far, but I just...I just...
My thoughts are reeling, searching frantically for a way to explain it, but then Sav takes my hand and squeezes.
“But the connection is so strong, you couldn’t fight it,” she says quietly, and I’m so fucking relieved to hear understanding in her voice.
Of course, she gets it. I never should have doubted her. Sav will always be on my side. I turn my head so I can see her, and I find her already looking at me.
“Yeah. It is.”
“Well,” she says, a small smirk forming on her lips. “Every person in this band would be fucking hypocrites if we criticized you for it.”
A small, sad laugh bubbles out of me, and I nod. “That’s true.”
She squeezes my hand again. “I love you, Mabes. I’ll back you in any way you need me to, okay? Even if me and Ham have to tussle. I got you.”
I laugh again. “You barely reach Ham’s nipples, Sav.”
She waves me off. “I’ve had self-defense training for years. If I can take down Red, I can take down Wade Hammond. I’ll just blitz attack him while he’s sending a ragey email or bullying a frightened intern.”
I have seen her take down Red, her giant bodyguard of over a decade, so she probably could take on our manager.
“That won’t be necessary. I’ll handle my shit.”
“The offer stands.”
“You’re just looking for an excuse to knock Ham on his ass.”
She waggles her brows. “Since I was eighteen, babe. I think I’ve earned the opportunity.”
I roll my eyes. “I’ll keep you on standby, then.”
A knock has both our heads turning toward the door.
“Go away,” Sav calls, but the door swings open anyway, and in walks our manager with a giant bouquet of flowers.
“Hey, Ham. You think I could take you in a fight?” she asks before standing and sauntering over to him.
He arches a brow. “You wish, Shaw.”
Hammond hands her the flowers, then calls over his shoulder as he leaves.
“Those aren’t for you. They’re for Rossi. Don’t forget your call time for tonight.”
The door closes behind him, and Sav and I look at each other with wide eyes. I bound off the couch after her just as she clutches the bouquet to her chest and sprints into the attached bathroom, slamming the door behind her. Bitch.
“Savannah, open the door, damn it. Those aren’t for you!”
I bang on the door and jiggle the handle. She’s locked it.
“Open the door, you hoe! Those aren’t for you! Open the door!”
She flings the door open just as I’m trying the handle for the tenth time, and her scowl is murderous. The gorgeous bouquet has been discarded in the sink, and she slaps the card in my hand.
“Say the word, and I’ll order the shit.”
I know even before I read the card that the flowers are from Kat, but nothing could have prepared me for the words she’s written.
I miss you, sweetie.
I’m ready to go public.
Love, me