Chapter Twenty-Four
I started to move so that Levern’s dagger would land somewhere on my body besides a vital organ.
Zain had rushed the Epirian and was trying to stop him, but he wouldn’t be fast enough.
I heard the loud whisper of an arrow cutting through the air and it struck Levern right in his chest, sending him flying back and into Zain. Both men ended up on the ground.
I whirled around and saw the Daemonian leader with a bow.
Guards were yelling at him and the Daemonian yelled back that the Epirian had ignored the rules and had cheated by having an additional weapon and trying to attack after he was out and that they were preserving the sanctity of the tournament.
Levern was on top of Zain and there was blood everywhere. Bile rushed into my mouth. Oh goddess, had that arrow pierced him, too?
I ran over to him and shoved the Epirian off. “Are you all right?” I asked, trying to look him over to find where he was bleeding from.
“I’m fine. The blood’s not mine. Levern’s sternum stopped the arrow.” He got into a sitting position and I saw that it was true. The blood on the ground was not coming from Zain.
If that Daemonian had chosen to shoot the Epirian in the neck instead of the chest, it would have gone through and hit Zain. My heart thundered in my chest, making me feel panicked. I had come so close to losing him.
And for what?
I reached over to hug him, just to reassure myself that he was intact and safe. If something had happened to him, what would I have done?
“Were you worried about me?” he teased as his arms went around me.
I couldn’t respond. I didn’t trust myself. I just hugged him tighter.
“Do you hear that? You won the last event, my illora.”
I pulled back so that I could see his face. “That’s not fair. You didn’t lose. You weren’t defeated by anyone in the arena. There was outside interference.”
“I’m on the ground, aren’t I? That’s the rule. You won. You were the last one standing.”
The stadium chanted my name and this time it felt like everyone was saying it. It was everything that I had thought I wanted, but it paled in comparison to the man in front of me.
I had gone and done what I’d been afraid of. I felt a real connection, an emotional one. I wanted more from Zain. I wanted to see him after the tournament ended.
And if that wasn’t possible, I decided that I would give myself this one night with him. A memory to hang on to for the rest of my life. It might break my heart, but I was willing to pay that price.
“Tonight,” I said.
“Tonight?” he repeated, unsure.
“We’re going to have a proper goodbye.”
His dark eyes lit up with understanding, and a barb of heat pierced me.
He looked as if he was about to kiss me when the stadium fell silent.
I turned to see the announcer on the dais.
“The judges have voted and it is unanimous—Basileia of Thrace has not only won the final event, but she is the overall winner of the tournament!”
It was like the stadium exploded with sound. I grinned at Zain.
“Good moment?” he asked.
“Good moment,” I affirmed.
“Tonight will be better,” he promised.
Before I could respond, officials and judges were crowding around us, all speaking to me. Congratulating me, urging me to come with them so that I could be crowned.
I wanted to tell them all to go away and to have tonight start right this moment.
But this was all part of it. I would have to perform for them so that I could get my prize. I looked back at Zain, who mouthed the word “Later” to me, and I nodded and left with the Sagari.
They put me up on the dais. Music was playing, the crowd was still chanting my name, and they only got louder whenever I waved to them.
The announcer tried to call for silence but no one listened. They all continued to cheer, and so he gave up and motioned to one of the judges. That judge came over to place a golden crown of laurels on my head. It was a bit too big—it had obviously been made for a man.
But it stayed put and I waved again to the audience.
“Thank you so much,” I said to the people around me, hoping to beg off soon.
“Now you must come and let us celebrate you properly!” a different judge said.
“I—”
There was no time to protest. I was being prodded along, through the lower levels of the stadium and to the party room in the barracks. It was just as elegant and beautiful as it had been before, but no one was dressed formally this time, as we’d all just arrived.
People who hadn’t been interested in speaking to me or associating with me a few days earlier now all wanted to talk to and praise me.
Several Sagari offered to become my sponsor for next year’s game, but I declined.
The faces had started to blend together as one person after the next came up to me.
I was essentially holding court, as if I were a queen and these were my new subjects. It was what I’d imagined I wanted. Everybody here thought I was enough. They were impressed by me. Praising me.
But this wasn’t what I wanted right now. I glanced at the doors, wondering how many more hours I’d have to stay here until I could leave.
If I truly wanted to lead, then I should have been treating this like a trial run. Getting a feel for what it was like when everyone wanted my attention. But if this was leading . . . I wasn’t sure that I wanted it.
Perhaps it would feel different if I were surrounded by Thracians and my loved ones.
Or maybe it wouldn’t.
My future suddenly felt a bit unsure. A nagging, negative sensation tugged at my soul, whispering that I wasn’t meant to become my clan’s leader.
That there was something else out there for me. Maybe I needed to find out what it was. Map out a different future for myself. Yes, I still felt like I was meant to lead, but it didn’t have to be in Thrace.
I decided to bring the diviner stone back to my mother. She led our nation—I was sure she had much bigger and far more pressing questions that she needed answers to than I did.
I would find my own path.
That decision lightened my spirit, as if a large weight had been lifted. Like I was making the right choice.
One of the officials told me that I would be able to pick up my prizes in the morning. He gave me directions to the bank and said he’d see me there tomorrow. I thanked him.
Right as he left, three men stepped forward and introduced themselves. I nodded at them, and then the shortest of the three said, “You are about to come into a very large sum of money.”
Had they overheard my last conversation?
“I wanted to offer you the opportunity to invest that money in something that will bring you many, many returns. I am going to create a water passage from here to the sea.”
“Not this again,” the man in the middle said loudly, rolling his eyes. “It will never happen and you will never make money from it. Stop trying to get people to give you their money!”
“It will work,” the first man insisted.
“Even if the god of wealth himself told me in a dream to invest in your scheme, I still wouldn’t do it. It is a bad investment!”
The three men began to argue among themselves and I realized that no one else was waiting to talk to me. I wasn’t sure exactly how much time had passed but it had been far too long and I wanted to find Zain. I had thought he might show up at the party but he never did.
As I made my way to the door, I thought about what the last man had said. About gods appearing in dreams.
Why was Invara appearing to me? And why was Eramis there?
There was no one that I could ask about this.
Except for Lia, a voice whispered.
She had regular dreams about her goddess. And she called on her goddess’s power. What if Lia had been right and I had a similar ability?
It seemed extremely far-fetched that I could wield magic, but Invara had been appearing to me and speaking.
I found an empty room and closed the door, locking it behind me.
I didn’t want anyone to see what I was about to do.
Especially since Lia and her sisters had shared how, when they’d first used their magic, it would drain them to the point that they would pass out.
If I was going to lose consciousness, I wanted to be alone.
I felt a bit foolish making that preparation when I was convinced it wouldn’t even work.
Of Invara’s two aspects, I chose the one that seemed less dangerous.
“Invara Pothos,” I said.
Desire.
And instantly everything changed. My mind cleared and quieted, and my body took over.
I ached as I had never ached before. Desperation combined with frantic need clawed its way up my chest. A raging inferno had come to life inside me and I instinctively knew that there was only one way to quench it.
I needed Zain.
But I forced myself to wait, to see if the magic would overtake me. And the longer I stood there, the more amorous I felt. The worse the ache got. The fire burned brighter and hotter.
I didn’t feel weakened or in danger of fainting. Perhaps it was because I was battle-favored. I could withstand the cost since I was already strengthened.
Deciding that I would be fine, I unlocked and opened the door and ran to our room. If Zain wasn’t there, I didn’t know what I would do. I would probably go mad from the frustration.
But when I threw open the door, he was there.
“Thank Invara,” I breathed.
He was lying on his bed. He had released his shoulder pins and so his tunic fell to his waist, held up by his annoying belt. He was reading something that he put under his pillow when I came in.
I wanted to laugh. I wasn’t here for his book.
Not able to help myself, I drank him in. If I had been attracted to him before, it was nothing like it was now. He had the most glorious chest I had ever seen, and all I could think about was licking every inch of it.
“Are you all right?” he asked.
“Never better.”
He got up and reached for his pin to reattach his tunic. And as much as I would have liked to undress him again, it seemed a crime for him to cover up. I moved quickly, faster than I ever had before, so that I stood between him and the table.
“Don’t do that,” I said. Not able to help myself, I reached out to run my fingers along the lines of his torso. Soft and strong and warm.
“Basileia—”
I raised a finger to his lips and saw a muscle in his jaw clench. It was as if I were hyperaware of him and his reactions. As well as my own.
Everything was heightened. It almost felt like being in a dream.
“I’ve been with you for days and days, and despite the fact that you are the king of thieves, you haven’t tried to steal another kiss.” I pushed up on my toes so that our lips were close together. That muscle in his jaw flicked again.
“I’m not sure I can steal what is being freely offered.” He put his hands on my upper arms, and I anticipated that he would pull me close, but he just stood there.
Like he was keeping me where I was.
I didn’t understand.
So I tried to play with him. I reached up to touch the back of his nape, stroking with his soft hair. “You think I’m offering to kiss you?”
“I think you’re dying for me to kiss you.” There was a strange quality in his voice. I had thought he’d be eager. Excited.
I certainly was. I brushed my lips against his chest and his grip on me tightened.
But he still didn’t pull me to him.
“Are you drunk?” he asked.
I smiled against his skin. “No.”
“Have you had Ilionian honeyed wine?”
I’d heard all about that drink and its effects. “Do they even have that here?”
“They have everything here.”
Why were we talking? I moved my mouth to press small kisses against his neck. He stayed totally still, completely silent. I wished my mind were working better so that I could understand what was happening right now.
All I knew was that I was desperate for him and I needed him. Why didn’t he understand that?
He took a step back from me, but with the room so small, there wasn’t really anywhere for him to go. “Basileia, this isn’t you.”
“It is me. It’s me finally admitting what I want now that this is all over and I won.”
His expression darkened. “So you’re here to claim all your prizes?”
“You’re not a prize that I’m owed,” I said.
“Then what is this? What do you want?” he asked.
I waited several beats before I responded. “I thought it was obvious. I want you inside me.”