Chapter 16 #2
“What?” Jacob looked up and realized he’d been sitting motionless on the motorcycle for a while.
“Take all the time you need,” the saleswoman continued in that same peppy tone she’d been using since he walked into the dealership, even though he’d heard her talking in a bored monotone to her coworker before she saw Jacob.
Jacob shook his head. “I’m fine. I’m good. I’m just…”
“It can be a lot to take in,” the saleswoman said. “Do you want me to go over the instructions again?”
“No, I got it. Clutch, break, accelerator. I mean, throttle.” Jacob twisted the throttle gently and let out a nervous laugh as the motorcycle slid forward.
“You’re free to ride around the parking lot,” the saleswoman said cheerily. “Are you sure you don’t want to take it around the block? If you give me a minute, I can suit up and come along.”
“I’m not going for a proper ride,” Jacob scoffed. He wasn’t even wearing protective gear, just jeans and a helmet the saleswoman had given him. “I mean, I’m okay. Thank you.”
He pushed any thoughts of Felix out of his mind and twisted the throttle cautiously.
The motorcycle lurched slowly forward. Too slowly, Jacob realized as it started listing to the side, as if it was about to fall over from lack of momentum.
The same thing had happened when he was learning to ride a bicycle, his parents calling fretfully in the background for him to slow down.
Both refused to acknowledge that if you rode too slowly, your bike would fall over.
They just kept suggesting he keep the training wheels on.
Jacob pushed the throttle harder. The motorcycle rumbled across the empty parking lot, and Jacob chuckled, giddy. He was doing it! It felt just as amazing as he always imagined. Except…
His smile faded. When he’d pictured trying a motorcycle for the first time, Felix was there. Whooping and cheering him on. Telling him to go faster. Trying to talk him into performing a bunch of illegal maneuvers right in front of the saleswoman.
Jacob frowned. He’d imagined this moment so many times. He’d never realized how empty it would feel without Felix here.
He was so busy thinking about Felix, he didn’t notice the guy in front of him until it was almost too late.
“Whoa!” He grabbed the brakes, skidding to a stop just before he could crash into Jack Smith, who didn’t even brace for impact. He just stood there, eye bags as heavy as ever, wearing an expression that declared this might as well happen.
“I’m so sorry,” Jacob said, yanking off his helmet. “I should have been paying attention.”
Jack sighed and rubbed a hand down his sweaty face. He was covered in engine grease. “Hey, I get it. This parking lot’s pretty crazy.”
Jacob winced as Jack motioned around the empty parking lot. “I really am sorry. Do you work here?”
“Sort of,” Jack said, pointing behind him. “I work at the garage.”
Jacob turned. There was indeed a garage attached to the motorcycle dealership. Creative Writing TA, bartender, mechanic… just how many jobs did this guy have?
Jacob turned back to see Jack waving at the saleswoman, who was eyeing Jacob cautiously from just outside the dealership door.
“He’s fine,” Jack called, and gestured at the motorcycle Jacob was straddling. “Didn’t expect you on one of these. You’re the pocket protector guy, right? You yelled at Felix for twenty minutes because he ate off a knife.”
“I have a family friend who cut off his tongue,” Jacob argued. Then he paused. Now that he thought about it, that story was probably one of the many tales his parents made up to corral him into good manners.
By the look of it, Jack was having the same thought.
“Motorcycles aren’t that dangerous,” Jacob said. “If you wear the right gear and you obey the road rules.”
“Uh-huh.” Jack nodded at Jacob’s clothes. “Where’s your gear?”
Jacob looked down at his admittedly lackluster protection: boots, jeans, and a long-sleeved shirt. At least he had the helmet tucked under his arm. He’d looked into the proper gear, but he couldn’t justify going into debt when he wasn’t even going to buy the motorcycle.
“I’m not going on a proper ride,” Jacob said.
“Sure,” Jack said. He rubbed sleep out of his eye, then made a face when he noticed the engine oil he’d almost rubbed into it. He dropped his grubby hand back to his side, then looked at it thoughtfully.
“How’s Felix’s hand? I’ve been sick, I haven’t been in class.”
“It’s better. He’s been taking care of it really well.
Most of the time. In that first week he tried to over-exert himself, but I stopped him.
” Jacob stopped, suddenly self-conscious.
Was it weird that he was mother-henning his best friend so much?
Everybody back home was used to it, but city people seemed baffled by it sometimes.
“Good,” Jack said, thankfully unbothered. “You’ve got your work cut out for you, looking out for him. That kid should wear a leash, with all the trouble he gets into. One time—” He stopped, coughing suspiciously loudly. “Uh, anyway. Glad he’s doing okay.”
Jacob frowned. It sounded like Jack had been about to share a Felix anecdote. Jacob didn’t even know Jack had a Felix anecdote. And didn’t Felix do the same thing a few days ago? He’d started talking about Jack the Hot TA, then suddenly changed the subject.
“Since when do you two hang out?” Jacob asked, his hands tightening around the handlebars.
Jack’s brows shot up. Then he chuckled, and Jacob was infuriated to see he had a dimple. He was Felix’s type, Jacob supposed: tall and muscly with great eyes. And he was smart. And he could appreciate Felix’s degree a hell of a lot more than Jacob could.
But he couldn’t appreciate Felix like Jacob could. Nobody did. Jacob had known him his whole life, and loved him for all of it. He just hadn’t realized until this year, because he was pathetically repressed.
Jack is straight, he reminded himself. Quit being jealous.
“Right,” Jack said slowly. “You’re the guy. Forget I said anything.”
The guy, Jacob thought, his heart pounding a mile a minute. Did Felix say something about him? Oh god, did Felix complain about him?
“He said he wouldn’t sleep with you,” Jacob blurted. “He said you're straight, and…”
He wanted to explain the list. How Felix had promised not to sleep with anyone until it was over. But he’d never told anybody about his sex life except Felix, and the words died in his throat. He suddenly felt like he was naked, all his stupid desires flopping out over the damn motorcycle.
Jack rolled his eyes. “We’re not sleeping together. Even if I did bat for your team, that kid isn’t my type.”
“Kid? You’re, like, three years older than us,” Jacob said.
Jack ignored him, as he always did when people pointed out his age. He ran a hand through his greasy hair, wincing when it caught on a tangle and he had to yank it free.
“If he didn’t tell you,” he said, wiping his hand on his stained tank top, “I don’t want to get in the middle of anything. See you, math guy.”
“I’m doing a stats degree,” Jacob called after him. “It’s more than math!”
Jack didn’t reply. Jacob didn’t blame him.
He stood there, white-knuckling the handlebars for a full minute after Jack left. You’re the guy. It sounded significant. It couldn’t be what Jacob hoped, obviously. Felix didn’t date, let alone fall in love. He just wasn’t that kind of guy. Right?
Then again, Jacob thought, neither were you.
Somebody cleared their throat beside him.
Jacob jumped so hard he almost fell over, having to plant his feet so he didn’t drag the motorcycle with him.
“Hi,” said the saleswoman. “Can I help with anything? You look… stressed.”
“I’m fine,” Jacob croaked. He climbed off the motorcycle, feeling like an idiot. He barely got ten seconds of riding it, but he didn’t have any urge to try it now. It wasn’t fun without Felix cheering him on.