Chapter 7
Chapter Seven
LIVIANNA/LILY
Then
Porcelain Boundaries & The Heat That Breaks Them
Some rules don’t bend. They disappear the second he stares at me like I’m already his.
I’m hanging on the edge because how the next five minutes play out will change the entire course of my life. I desperately want Callum to kiss me, but my brother is going apeshit.
“Come on, Guns. Don’t be an asshole. Lily and I are gonna end up together whether you like it or not. I was just asking her to wait. I’m not dumb enough to do anything until your parents approve.”
Callum moves around the bar and joins me by my side. “But I had to let her know because I don’t want her ruining it by going off and dating someone while we’re touring.”
“She’s fucking fourteen, Cash.” Bren broadens his shoulders and steps to Callum.
“She doesn’t look fourteen. Shit, I thought she was older than us until your ma threw out her age.” Callum gestures with his head in my direction. “I know she’s your sister, but you can’t deny how tempting she looks.”
“I don’t see her that way, but I know everyone else does.” Bren keeps his angry stare locked with Callum’s. “Cash, it’s gonna be hard enough as it is. Being with her could bring a lot of bullshit to the road. I don’t like it and my parents will hate it.”
I guess my kiss with the gorgeous, dark-haired, blue-eyed Callum is on hold. “It’s okay, Callum. I’ll wait. Just focus on your music.”
While I’m creating a plan to get what I want.
Between his slight Irish accent and his words, Callum Mayze is smoking hot. And he will be my first kiss.
We end up out in our resort-like backyard, making s’mores at the fire pit. Callum, Bren, and I are eating ours, sitting on bed-like lounge chairs near the pool and away from the adults.
As we talk about the entertainment industry, Callum’s gaze keeps falling to my breasts. I’m cross-legged in the center of my chair and have my chest pushed out to make my boobs look even bigger. I’m one of the lucky girls who developed early.
Callum turns to me, brushing his dark hair off his forehead. He wears it longer on top and it keeps falling in his eyes.
“How did you get into acting, Lily?”
“You know my mom’s a model. She put me in a contest for the most beautiful baby and I won. She had me in shows and movies not much after that.” I shrug. “She runs everything. I just go where I’m told.”
He leans toward me like he’s truly interested. “Do you like that?”
“Yeah, I have my own show now. It’s called Ember From Denver. I play a young girl who’s determined to create a female rock band and make it big. She lives in Denver and works in the music scene there. It’s tough because she’s young, so it becomes her mission.” I glance at Bren.
He rises to his feet. “I want another one. I’ll be back.”
Once he’s away from us, Callum scoots to the edge of his lounge chair so he’s right in front of me. “You sing?”
“I do, but not very much. I have to perform a song every few episodes, but it’s not the center of the show.”
“We should do a duet.” He places his hand on my knee.
My body ignites. Zings of electricity splinter in every direction through my insides. I’ve been attracted to boys before, but this weird sensation is something new.
“I’m not a good singer, Callum. You wouldn’t want to do a duet with me.”
“It wouldn’t be for anyone else but us.”
“Oh…” My stomach flips. This boy is doing something strange to me and I like it. A lot! “I’ll ask about the song. If my dad says it’s okay, I’ll do it.”
“Why ask for permission?”
“Because I always have to ask my parents if I can do something work-related.”
“You’re your own person, Lily. Be free and do what you want for a change. Otherwise, you’ll always be doing what other people tell you to do. What kind of life is that?”
My mind goes blank. No one has ever said anything like that to me. I thought everyone did what was expected of them.
I swerve to a topic I understand. “How did you get into music?”
He removes his hand from my knee. “My pops was a musician. He taught me everything I know. Now that he’s gone, I wanna follow in his footsteps.”
“Where is he?”
“Dead.” Callum’s eyes grow dark and pained.
Did he say dead? How do I respond to that?
“I’m sorry.” My heart squeezes. “How did he die?”
“Suicide.”
A quick zap of agonizing tension seeps through me as my stomach bottoms out. At least you didn’t murder him. I scratch at my wrist with my fingernails.
I force the thought away. “Callum, that’s so sad.”
“It’s okay. I like to look at it like this. The best artists usually die young. Most don’t live past their sixties. That means they hit middle age when they were about thirty, sometimes even younger.”
“I still feel bad for you. That must be hard.”
“It is at times.” He gazes at the ground. “The greatest die early. My pops was the best. I guess that’s why he had wisdom so young.”
“What do you mean?”
“Like many of the greats, he wrote some of the best lyrics in the industry. He was a poetic genius. Everyone I meet tells me so.”
“You’re going to be even better than him someday.” I get up and sit next to Callum.
I inch closer, placing my hand on his thigh. He stares at it for a moment.
“Thanks, Lily.” He glances over and flashes me a rockstar smile. “I’ve wanted to be a musician all my life.”
“And now you are.”
“Yeah, but that means I can’t fuck it up for just one kiss. We have to wait for your parents’ permission, or I’ll lose my lifelong dreams.”
I remove my hand and peek over at my dad. He’s watching me and I know Callum’s right. If I push this right now, my parents will never let me date him.
Callum finishes his s’more. “You know, Lily. Until I can taste your sweetness, I’m gonna focus on eating these gooey treats, and every time I do, I’ll imagine it’s you on my tongue.”
My eyes round. That was so dirty, but my stomach is doing somersaults and my heart is thrumming.
He chuckles. “I forget you’re fourteen. You’ve probably never had any guy say something like that to you.”
I shake my head because I can’t speak or breathe. He’s talking like he wants to have sex with me. I shift to break away from feeling so…inexperienced.
“My friends talk like that to people they’re dating, so it’s nothing I haven’t heard.” I change the subject. “Why did you decide to call me Lily?”
“Because the second you sucked me into those sky-blue eyes, all I saw was peace and beauty surrounding you. I thought lilies better described you. I’m sure I’ll call you Liv sometimes because I know I’ll never be able to live without you.”
Well, it’s why my entire family calls me that. At least that’s what they tell me, but they’re required to feel that way.
Callum saying it is sweet, but I don’t know how to act, so I laugh instead. “I bet you say things like that to every girl.”
He stares at me with the intensity of a wildfire. “I don’t.”
My heart pitter-patters. Oh, I really like Callum Mayze and I think he might be my undoing. I gaze over at Bren and the adults. He shoves a bite of a s’more into his mouth and strolls into the house.
Good. That gives me more alone time with Callum. I start to turn away, but my mom’s motherly glare lands on me. She shakes her head, takes her two index fingers together, and makes a quick parting movement with them.
Dammit.
She’s telling me to get away from Callum. I roll my eyes and move to the other lounge chair. Maybe Callum’s right and I should have more freedom to do what I want.
I lie on my side and peer over at him. He’s so fine. I think he’s the best-looking guy I’ve ever seen. He’s wearing a black T-shirt and his biceps and chest muscles are stretching the material. Yeah, he’s got a body to match his great looks.
He flashes me a smug smile. “Why are you staring at my chest?”
My cheeks flare white-hot. “I wasn’t.”
“Yes, you were. I caught you.”
I swallow but decide to be daring. “You’re sexy.”
“So are you.” He reclines back, resting on his palms. “I can’t wait to explore every inch of you.”
He does want to have sex with me. I haven’t even kissed a boy, but I’d do anything with him. Butterflies release in my chest and my skin tingles. He’s naughty and I like it.
Not knowing how to react, I sit and fidget with the bottom of my tank top. “You’re sixteen?”
“Seventeen in a few months.”
“I’ll be fifteen in a couple of months.”
“When’s your birthday?”
“September first.”
He raises his eyebrows and nods. “We’re not that far apart in age.”
“When’s yours?”
“December first. We’re both born on the first. I guess that means we can always be each other’s number one.” He pushes up and rests his elbows on his knees. “But I still can’t take you out until I get the okay.”
My heart shrinks, knowing that will be a while. “You’ll wait for me, won’t you, Callum?”
“Every day until I can make you mine.” The intensity of his words makes me believe him.
“Did you mean what you said earlier about seeing me like a lily, or do you use those lines on every girl?”
“I meant them. I don’t know where they came from, but since I laid eyes on you, I can’t stop thinking things like that. They fall from my lips without giving it a second thought.”
“Those are some pretty adult things to say.”
“My ma says I’m an old soul and some kind of poetic genius like my pops. She says I’ve always said things like that, but I’ve never said them to a girl. Unless I’m singing a song I wrote.”
“When did you start writing?”
“I started writing poetry as soon as I could hold a pen. It was shit at first, but it’s better now.” He lounges back but keeps his gaze on me.
I do the same. “You write your own lyrics?”
“Yeah. I don’t get to use them much since we are under the label, but someday I will when I go solo.”
I think about that for a moment. I work and have tutoring, so I won’t get to go to many of their shows. He may find some other girl while he’s away. I crease my brows together and turn away from him.
His voice breaks into my thoughts. “Did I say something bad?”
“No. I just won’t ever get to see you play in concert. I’ve got school and work. There’s no way my parents will let me go to one of your gigs.”
“Livianna, you need to let loose. And one day, I’m gonna show you the way.”
“I have a good time.” I glare over at him.
“Yeah?” He smirks. “You work as many hours as they’ll let you and tutor on top of that. From what Guns has said, you enjoy listening to him play and practicing your lines. Sometimes you bake with your ma. The kind of fun I’m talking about is a lot different.”
“You mean like an amusement park?”
“No.” He laughs. “But wait. Have you never been to an amusement park?”
“I have for photo shoots or promo videos, but I’ve never run around all day and ridden all the rides.”
His eyes grow big. “Your parents never took you?”
“No. But not because they wouldn’t. Bren’s always doing things around music, and I’ve always been about modeling and acting.”
“Exciting,” he says sarcastically.
How rude. I get defensive.
“They would make plans to take us, but when I was with my mom, all I wanted to do was play dress-up and take pictures. If I was with my dad, all I wanted to do was read a story, recite it to him while I acted it out.”
Callum rolls his eyes. “That’s not fun, Lily.”
My breathing picks up. “It is for me.”
“Like I said, one of these days, I’m gonna show you how to let loose. Hey, I might even take you to an amusement park. Trust me. You’ll be enlightened.”
I growl at his smug attitude. “Using your big words again, Callum. I’m not impressed, so save them for when you’re trying to get some other girl.”
His expression grows serious. “No. I won’t ever try to date some other girl. I only want you.”
And just like that, I melt. Yeah, Callum Mayze is definitely going to give me a run for my money. Worse, he’ll probably break my heart and I’ll lose him.
I know too many women at the studio who have told me stories about how they’ve loved hard and lost even harder. That sends beams of fiery rage striking my chest. With that revelation, I rise to my feet.
I glower down at him. “I’ve heard about boys like you. You’re the kind of guy who says that to every girl you meet. I think you’re a big, fat liar.”
I spin away. Bren’s strolling toward us while the adults stare in our direction. I start to march off, but Callum grabs my arm and twists me back to him. He steps an inch away from my face.
His pissed-off glare burns into mine. “I don’t fucking lie, so don’t say that ever again.”
My breath catches in my throat. I stare up at him, afraid to move. No boy… No person has ever been this emotional with me unless it was acting. Callum’s not doing that. He’s dead serious.
My dad yanks Callum back. “Son, why are your hands on my daughter?”