Chapter Twenty-One #2
He rolls his eyes. “Yes, Killer, Dr. Angel Adams. Which, by the way, is a nickname he despises.”
“Okay, okay, if ever I meet Alfie , I’ll be sure to use his given name,” I tease.
“Anyway”—he gives me a pointed look—“I call him when I need him, but I have a standing appointment once a week.”
Dr. Angel—celebrated psychologist and TV presenter.
He helps people on a famous daytime TV show once a week.
He’s like a qualified agony aunt although I’m not sure I’d ever say that to him.
And let’s face it, he’s absolutely gorgeous.
Sharp jawline and dark eyes, he’s serious and broody.
He looks like he’s ready to roll his eyes every time a viewer calls in with a problem, but he’s professional and courteous and, honestly, gives great advice.
“I can tell by the pause in our conversation that you are getting dreamy eyes for Dr. Angel.” He laughs, honking my nose again.
As much as I try not to, I feel my cheeks redden.
“He really isn’t as handsome in real life. And despite being excellent at his job, he’s really a boring bastard.”
“Is that so?”
“Yes, and I’m much better looking.” He winks.
I laugh, throwing my head back. “No doubt in my mind, old man. Alfie, who?” I reach up on my tiptoes to kiss his lips. He palms my ass to assist my reach. Such a gentleman. Can’t say I’d get that treatment from Dr. Angel. He’d more likely get me a step stool.
“How did it start with Alfie? Did you tell him everything straight away?”
I let him talk without interruption. His shoulders are bunched up by his ears. His voice isn’t smooth like usual; it’s hesitant and rough, like just getting the words out is a herculean effort, even though he’s already told me the story of what led him to call Alfie in the first place.
“Well, we had our first session, and he said it was a bit of a conflict because we grew up together, but he was intrigued, so he said yes. I told him everything, and I mean everything . All the terrible things I’d done that were so unforgivable.
Things I could never take back. And after I finished talking, I asked him what I should do. ”
“What was his advice?”
He smiles now. “He said it sounded like I needed a vacation, a long one.”
“A vacation?”
“Yeah, he asked me if it would put me in danger to take an extended vacation from the organization. I thought about it, and I knew that my father wouldn’t physically harm me.
So that’s what I did. Anytime a job was given to me, I’d tell my father no because I was on vacation.
Avoiding my father’s associate and his wife by running into Squeeze the Day might have been the best thing that’s ever happened to me. ”
“So, she really wasn’t your type then?” I tease.
“Nah, how could she be?” His thumb runs up my cheek.
I smile, looking down for a moment.
“So, I ran into Squeeze the Day, and you know the rest. I saw you, the heavens opened, angels sang—”
“Stop it, you goof.” I pinch his ribs, and he pulls me onto his chest. I rest my head against his firm chest, feeling how hard his heart is racing.
“I called Alfie that day and told him I’d met you.”
“You told him about me?”
“Olivia.” He seems bolder now that he doesn’t have to look me in the eye, and his voice is steadier.
“If I hadn’t met you that day...Fuck, if I hadn’t seen you be so fucking kind and considerate and gentle, I would have gone straight back to work.
I would have gritted my teeth and just gotten on with it.
You gave me the courage to be better. I wanted to be more like you.
A good person that made people feel good. ”
“You make me feel good.”
He strokes my hair, and I nuzzle in closer, aware of how monumental this conversation is.
“I think I fell in love with you that day,” he murmurs against my ear.
My heart stops—like a deep breath before the start of a race, before the horses are released and the chaos ensues. My heart kicks back in, galloping against my chest. In love? In love?
“You don’t have to say anything. I...I know this is too soon. Alfie told me not to tell you so soon, but I couldn’t wait. You have to know.”
My heart is in my throat, choking me. It’s blocking my voice box and despite opening my mouth, nothing is coming out.
This is where this is heading, right? I know I’m falling for him too.
I know I’ll be saying the words eventually, but I just never felt I could trust him to reciprocate them.
Like this is all some elaborate game, but he’s proved time and time again this is real.
We’re real. I’m going to tell him. I have to let him know, too .
I twist my body around so I’m leaning on my elbow. My free hand feels the warmth of his chest and the thump of his heart. I meet his eyes, and he’s smiling softly, nerves clinging to the corner of his lips.
“Austin, I . . .”
Ringing cuts me off, and Austin shifts, grabbing my arms and pulling me off him.
“I have to get this. It’s my emergency line.”
“Oh, okay.” That’s not what I thought he was going to say.
He jumps off the couch, answering the phone quickly.
“Yes?” He paces back and forth like a lion locked up at a zoo.
I bite my thumbnail, eager for him to come back to the couch, but the longer he paces, the further we get away from the perfect, vulnerable moment we’ve just shared. His eyes keep darting toward me as he runs his free hand over his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose.
“Send the address now. We’ll be there.”
We’ll be there. We.
It hits me square in the chest. My bubble of love and yearning in my chest sinks until it hits my gut. His words penetrate the fragile bubble I’ve held inside for too long.
Danny. Something’s happened to him.
I’m off the couch before he gets off the phone.
“Yes, she’s coming. Send me the address, Luca.”
He hangs up, turning toward me. He closes the distance between us within a few strides, but something tells me we’re further away from each other than we have been in weeks.
“Tell me,” I whisper.
“Danny is in hospital.”
I wait for him to tell me this is some awful joke. But his eyes tell me he’s telling the truth.
“You promised me,” I say as a small sob escapes. I draw away from him, and his face falls. “We should go now,” he says as I push past him, heading for the front door.
We don’t speak in the car, and despite going over the speed limit, it feels like the longest journey of my life.
“You’re bleeding,” he says, pulling my hand away from my mouth.
I look down, and he’s right. I’ve chewed my thumb so much that blood is slipping down the knuckle. I put my hand back into my lap, and Austin clenches his fist for a split second before returning to ten and two on the wheel.
Reaching the hospital, I dart inside, not waiting for Austin. I’m focused on getting to my brother, seeing him with my own eyes. It must be bad. Otherwise, Austin would have told me he was okay. But I don’t want to hear it from him. I don’t want to hear anything from him right now.
Someone must have called ahead because they know who I am when I reach the desk.
A nurse calls the doctor over, and he drops everything to speak with me.
His eyes dart between me and Austin, who remains quiet behind me.
It’s now I realize how intimidating he must look.
He’s tall, broad, and with a reputation for violence.
Even without that, he has a presence that commands a room, and he doesn’t have to say a word.
The doctor walks us through the hospital quickly; words like “induced coma,” “cracked femur,” and “fractured eye socket” ring through my ears as bile rises in my throat.
The glare of the corridor lights stings my eyes, and the smell of disinfectant sterilizes my lungs as we push past room after room.
We reach a room with the blinds closed and the door shut. The man I’d seen in my basement with Austin all those weeks ago sits slumped out front in the blue plastic hospital chairs. He stands immediately, whispering something to Austin. It pisses me off more than it should.
“You should brace yourself,” the doctor warns softly.
He twists the handle, entering the dimly lit room. A bright line shines in the corner, but the rest of it is almost fluorescent. The beeping of his heart rate monitor is steady, regular, and a comforting sound to hear.
I move past the doctor and a petite blonde nurse who is in the room already. She glances between the doctor and me and presses her lips together in a flat line.
Danny’s face is unrecognizable. I’m not even sure how they would know it’s him.
One side of his face is so swollen; it’s like a purple balloon animal has been stuck to his face.
Dried blood still clings to his other cheek as if they haven’t had time to clean him up yet.
A breathing tube hangs limply out of his mouth, his chest inflating and deflating at an unnaturally regular speed.
I go to reach for his hand, but the nurse blocks my arm before I can.
“Try the other side, honey.” Her voice is warm with a Southern twang I can’t quite place. I move around the bed, taking his hand in mine. Tears fall down my cheeks as I sob openly.
All those years I was raising him, barely keeping the lights on just to keep him in school. We’d made it, hadn’t we? We’d made it to adulthood, and things were finally starting to go well. We were turning a corner. We weren’t just scraping by anymore. We were growing, building.
“Olivia.” I hear Austin’s deep voice crack behind me.
I can’t look at him. I can’t. Everything he’s done, it’s all for nothing because he’s broken the only promise that really mattered. He told me Danny would be safe. He told me the business was legitimate. He told me. He told me. He told me. His words, his promises. They mean nothing.
He promised.
He told me he was in love with me.
I think I fell in love with you that day.
I couldn’t wait. You have to know.
Tension fills the air, and the nurse looks to me to make the next move. I shake my head at her, my eyes pleading, which she reads fluently.
Turning to Austin, the doctor shuffles awkwardly. “It’s family only in the room, I’m afraid.”
“She’s my fiancée,” he says weakly.
He must have thought of the excuse before. Maybe Luca warned him outside that they wouldn’t let anyone who wasn’t family stay. But his voice is limp, like he’s begging me. But I can’t look at him right now.
“I don’t know that man,” I finally say.
“Olivia . . .” he pleads.
“Leave. I don’t know who you are,” I spit out.
“Come on, honey. Time to go,” the nurse says calmly as she guides him from the room by the elbow. Despite her barely coming to his shoulder, he doesn’t put up a fight.