Chapter 20
Seek
Sighing, I tapped my fingers on my desk as I read over an article. I’d been scouring the internet for any information I could find about disappearances out in The Silverbells area. I’d found pitifully little throughout the week.
That being said, I wasn’t stupid enough to go out there and check it out by myself.
I wanted to, the urge was definitely there, but my notes made it glaringly obvious; people who walked out in that area alone, ended up missing.
The last thing I aspired to be was the stupid girl in the horror flicks that every movie goer yelled at not to go into the basement.
I wasn’t going to end up murdered out in the desert.
The only option that left me was research until I could figure something else out.
More than that, I needed the distraction.
Between Hush’s little bomb he dropped on me and the lack of any work in the last few days I was getting restless.
Burying myself in this investigation was the only way to take my mind off him.
Which brought me back to my pet project of The Silverbells disappearances.
Not for the first time, I wished I could convince Tommy to go out and just wander around for a few days.
No one would dare come after me when I had a bunch of cops next to me.
Of course, no one would do anything suspicious like kidnap a hiker in their presence either.
So maybe Tommy wasn’t the best escort. My curiosity was causing me to focus solely on this mystery.
Putting aside the need to be distracted from Hush, I just wanted to make sure no one else became a victim.
Tommy had been firm when I’d talked to him again. Without some kind of solid proof, he couldn’t do anything about it. The state didn’t care to pay its people to search the desert on a hunch. I couldn’t really blame them, though it was aggravating not being able to do anything.
My phone dinged and I had to shove down the excitement that tried to emerge. Hush and I hadn’t spoken all week, not since he’d left me high and dry at my door.
I wasn’t upset that he’d slept with me then called things off.
It didn’t even cross my mind that he’d only been trying to get into my pants.
I may not know him well, but I knew enough to know that wasn’t what had happened.
He wasn’t that kind of guy. What upset me was that I didn’t understand why he’d pulled away.
He’d told me at the start of all this he didn’t date.
So it wasn’t a complete shock when he’d ended us because of that.
Knowing that should have kept my heart safe.
No. Like an idiot, I’d fallen for him and gotten my feelings hurt when he dumped me.
Not just your feelings, he smashed your fucking heart.
Was it stupid to fall in love with a man you’d only been on one date with? Yes. Who was almost twice your age? Yes. Who lived a lifestyle that was conducive to wild parties and fights? Yes. Had I still done it? My heart throbbed painfully as an answer.
Picking up my phone, I saw Mom had texted about dinner tonight. I didn’t want to go, but I knew no showing on her would just ensure she placed herself firmly in my business.
Shutting down my computer, I abandoned my research to go spend time with my family.
* * *
“How was your week, Sweetie?” Mom asked as I sat down across from Jo and Brad.
“Fine,” I said, keeping my voice bright and cheery.
Despite my act, Mom narrowed her eyes on my face. My smile dimmed a little as panic set in. She had a never failing radar about her daughters and she’d picked up on my broken heart. Thankfully, Brad came to my rescue without even knowing it.
“I had a fucking cool week!”
“Don’t curse, Bradley.”
“Mrs. Simmons,” Brad said, confusion coloring Mom’s name. “My name isn’t Bradley.”
“Okay, Bradley. Just watch your mouth,” she warned, cheerfully ignoring his correction.
Brad looked at me in astonishment and I had to smother a laugh. That was Mom for you. She only heard half of what you said and only listened to a quarter of that.
“Yes, Mrs. Simmons,” he said dutifully.
“What happened, Babe?” Jo asked, spooning a dab of sour cream onto her plate.
“I almost got robbed!” Brad said, waiting with barely veiled excitement for his words to register.
When they did we all stared at him in shock. Jo gave a cry of distress and patted her hands over his body, as if she was going to find a gaping hole hidden beneath his clothes.
He told us about his boss getting hospitalized a few days prior and our horror grew. “Then some of Jake’s friends stopped in. I guess they’d been watching the place, thinking the robbers might come back.” He slid a sly look my way. “You know his friends, Jamie.”
I frowned in confusion, mentally rolling through my list of names who would be able to take on burglars. “The cops?” I finally asked.
“Nope, Hush and his crew.”
The blood drained from my face as Mom peered over at me. “Who’s Hush?”
Of course that was the part of the story she instantly zeroed in on.
She’d been sitting, quietly listening to the story until now.
Her future son-in-law almost getting robbed…
no interest. Mention a man in the same sentence as my name, yup, she’d dial in on that.
I kept my eyes solidly fixed on Brad, but I could feel Mom's eyes boring into me.
She was already picking out a wedding date and baby names for Hush and I. I was sure of it.
“Oh man. He was awesome!”
I couldn’t help but smile at Brad’s obvious hero worship.
“He took this guy’s gun away-”
“Someone pointed a gun at you?” Jo asked, voice more of a squeak than anything.
“Well, no, but he would have if the guys hadn’t been there.” He ran us through the whole story, blow by blow.
“What did you tell the cops?” I asked.
A look of realization dawned over his face. One that said maybe he shouldn’t have said so much. “I told them I beat the guys up,” he said, his energy plummeting.
Mom frowned at him. “Why did you lie?”
I peeked under the table at the boot that covered his broken ankle. It was doubtful the cops had believed his story, but if they had nothing else to go on, they’d let it drop.
“Um… They didn’t want the cops knowing it was them. Probably figured they’d get in trouble being bikers and all. I wasn’t trying to take credit for getting the robbers, but I didn’t want Hush and them to get into trouble either. It just seemed like the easiest thing to do.”
“They’re bikers?” Mom asked. Her eyes narrowed on me even tighter. At least that will stop her from planning a wedding now. “How do you know bikers?”
Shit. I glared at Brad, who currently looked like he wanted to disappear under the table. Still, he tried to fix his mistake, giving me an apologetic look. “They saved my life,” he insisted.
Mom snorted, but kept her gaze on me. “Jamie Marie Simmons. How do you know bikers?”
I nibbled my bottom lip, trying to come up with anything that could save me. Mom could sniff out a lie like a coonhound, though, so I ultimately told the truth. “Hush was the man I went on the date with.”
Silence descended. A quick peek at Mom was all I needed to know she was stunned. “You…” She cleared her throat and tried again. “You went on a date with a man in a motorcycle gang?”
Steeling my nerves, I nodded, but corrected her. “It’s a club, not a gang. He’s really nice, Mom.”
“I…I’m sure he is,” she relented, unsure of how to deal with this newest development.
It was too early to be relieved, but I could tell Mom was trying to be non-judgmental.
She was trying to balance the excitement at the possibility of her older daughter not being a spinster with the concerns about me dating a man that was clearly dangerous.
For the wrong people anyway. There wasn’t even a blip of fear in my heart when it came to Hush.
He may have shattered it, but he’d never physically hurt me and I’d known that since day one.
She’d be even more conflicted if she knew Hush’s age.
That won’t be a problem, I reminded myself.
“When do I get to meet him?”
“You don’t,” I told her. Before she could insist, I continued, “We decided we were better off as friends.”
Jo’s head jerked up from where she’d been continuing to look over Brad. She mouthed, ‘what?’ at me.
I gave a small jerk of my head, dissuading her from saying anything. There’d be plenty of time to tell her about it later. For now, I was busy evading Mom’s questions.
Brad saw an opportunity to right his mistake and asked, “Mrs. Simmons, could you help me with something for one of my classes?” I’d give him that, he might not be the most coordinated, and his judgment could be…
lacking. But he knew how to read my sister and knew when to run interference. That alone made him a keeper.
“Of course, Sweetie,” she said, shooting me a look that meant I’d be in for it later when she caught me alone. I didn’t plan on that happening—maybe for the rest of my life—and stood to clear the dishes from the table as Brad began outlining something from one of his college courses.
Jo stood and began to help me with the dishes. “What happened?” she hissed as soon as she started the water to fill the sink.
I poured soap into the water, then leaned back to check that Mom was still talking with Brad. When I saw them deep in conversation, I leaned back against the counter, facing Jo. “He took me to dinner. I asked him to take me home, well…his home.”
Jo’s eyes lit up and a smirk spread over her face. “Oh my God! When did you get so bold, you slut?” she asked with a laugh.
I let myself giggle along with her. “You’re the slut,” I reminded her.
“I prefer tease, but anyway that’s my point… Well,” she prompted.
“It was the best sex I’ve ever had,” I admitted.
“He’s so hot, how could it not be?” We both knew full well that good looks did not equal skill in the bedroom, but I didn’t comment on that.
“He drove me home the next morning and…broke up with me.” I looked up at the ceiling as though I was calculating the math in my mind.
“I’m not even sure if we were actually dating, but if we were, that has to be some kind of record.
Dumped twelve hours into the relationship and eight of those were spent sleeping.
” I shook my head with a jokingly mournful sigh.
Jo was dumbstruck. “He didn’t?” she asked in a slightly louder than regular pitch.
“Shhhh,” I hissed at her, leaning forward to check on Mom and Brad again. “Yeah,” I whispered, “he did.”
“But…but why?”
“I wish I knew,” I admitted with a shrug. “He’s so damn secretive he wouldn’t say.”
Jo’s lip curled up in disgust. “One of those guys who just wants to get laid then leaves.”
“I don’t think so,” I told her. “I mean, I guess I can’t say for sure, but he didn’t strike me as the type.
We kissed a couple of times before he even asked me on a date.
Honestly, he didn’t have to try that hard to get me into bed.
As angry and hurt as I am, to be honest, I don’t think it was an easy decision for him.
When he broke it off he looked…scared. Like, almost terrified. ”
She reached out and rubbed my shoulder, trying to comfort me. “You like him.”
“Ugh. I do. It’s stupid,” I said with a laugh, trying to cover up the fact that I wanted to cry.
“No, it isn’t. You never just go for it.
Believe me, I know that. I’ve tried over and over to get you to drop your inhibitions and go for the guys you’re interested in.
It’s like pulling teeth to get you out of the house most days, when you aren’t working that is.
I’m sorry he hurt you.” Her eyes flashed dangerously. “Want me to cut his balls off for you?”
My laughter spilled out and I pulled my baby sister in for a hug. “Thanks, but I’m fine. No need to castrate him. It was my own fault for getting too deep too fast when he told me from the beginning he wasn’t emotionally available.”
“He said that to you?”
My lips twisted in a sardonic smile. “In Hush language, yeah, he did.”
“I don’t know what that means,” she said into my ear as she stood in my embrace.
“Doesn’t matter. We’re done. I won’t see him again.”
“What if he comes groveling back?”
“He won’t.”
“What if you find out the reason why he bailed and it’s a good reason?” She pulled back and stared earnestly into my face. I really was blessed to have such a good sister. She was trying so hard to find a path to happily ever after for us. I just didn’t think it was in the cards.
“It’d have to be a damn good reason,” I replied. “I don’t go where I’m not wanted.” I’d already broken that rule with him once.
Jo pouted, her bottom lip sticking out comically far. “But you seemed so happy and excited when you were with him.”
“You saw me with him twice, for about three minutes each time.”
“Which should tell you how much he affected you if I noticed it in that timeframe.”
I dipped my hands in the hot soapy water and flicked bubbles at her. “Shut it.”
She wrapped her arms around me from behind and laid her chin on my shoulder. “I just want you to be happy.” She sounded like she was the one who was now on the verge of tears.
“Hey,” I said softly, turning in her arms and looking down at her. “I am happy… Okay? As long as I have you, Mom, Auron, and Jecht, that’s all I need.”
She smiled, but it didn’t reach her eyes. “Yeah, I know.” She let go and helped me with the dishes. She left me to my thoughts and as hard as I tried to avoid it a gorgeous man who was quiet as a shadow kept invading them.