Chapter 44 #2
I go to speak, but her fingers jam against my lips.
“Stop. Don’t say it just because I did. When you say it, I want to know you mean it.
When you say it, I want to be able to feel your words as well as hear them.
I want to feel them so hard, there won’t be a shred of doubt to the truth of them.
So wait, my love. Wait until you saying them will have your heart expanding and your world transforming. ”
“How are you so fucking amazing?” I say, right before my lips meet hers.
She straddles me, our bodies pinned against the tree as I taste our shared breath. My tongue presses between her silken parted lips and our kiss deepens as all of the emotions from the past few minutes explode between us.
My fingers cascade through her hair, my hands running down across her shoulders and then underneath the light sweater covering her sundress. I feel the outline of her breasts. The roundness of her belly. “I want you so fucking bad.”
She doesn’t hesitate. She doesn’t look around and decide it’s something we can’t do here because it’s midday. She doesn’t deny her need for me.
Because she wants me too.
Here.
Now.
She reaches for my belt, her eyes never straying from mine as panted breaths escape her. I grip her hips, lifting her off me so she can lower my pants just enough to free my burgeoning erection. I’ve never been happier that she’s wearing a dress. It will make this a whole lot easier.
There’s a savage glint in her eyes when she wraps my dick in her hand. She likes this. It’s risky. Adventurous. Dangerous. Sure, we’ve made love here before, but never in full daylight.
My groans of raw appreciation surround us as she works her hand on my cock, the feel of it electrifying me.
I reciprocate by lifting her dress, my hands worming up to knead her full breasts.
When my fingers tweak her stiff nipples, her head falls back, exposing the soft, taut skin of her neck which my tongue takes full advantage of.
A throaty mewl escapes her, and I have to use every ounce of willpower to keep myself from coming.
“Not so fast.” I push her hand away and crush her with my stare. “Show me what you want me to do.”
A blush bites her cheeks. But she doesn’t let embarrassment stop her. She takes my hand and shoves it inside her panties. With her still straddling me, I push two fingers inside her, gliding them in and out easily as she moves her body up and down.
I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to get enough of her. I hope I never will. Because this feeling I have right now—of wanting her more than my every memory—I want to feel this way about her every moment of every day.
Emotions overcome me and I declare, “Nobody else is ever going to touch you like this.”
“No,” she says, eyes closed as she rides my fingers.
“Say it, Ava.”
Her eyes open, bathing me in the depths of her heated gaze. “No one else will ever touch me.”
A tremble of my heart has me praying her words are true. Because although I’ve only been with her for a short time, I can no longer imagine being without her. Suddenly, my world has become brighter. There’s a certain clarity in knowing exactly what you want.
There’s also a terrifying vulnerability knowing it could all be taken away.
“I’ll never touch another,” I say, a knot of air catching in my chest. “Never worship anyone’s body but yours.”
Her eyes like hot embers now, I pull her in for another kiss. I can taste her salty tears as our lips devour each other once again. Sealing the deal. Affirming the promise we just made to each other.
“Make love to me, Trev.”
“Always.”
I rip off her panties and guide my cock inside her. She braces herself on her knees, hands pressing into my shoulders, gliding up and down in the most titillating way as I run my thumb in circles around her swollen clit.
Neither of us is going to last long. I can feel it in my balls. See it on her face.
“Open your eyes, babe.”
She does as I ask, and I swear we look deep into each other’s souls as we simultaneously explode with the most pleasurable, erotic, gratifying feeling a human can have.
I howl through my orgasm as her walls dance around my cock, milking me until I’m fully spent.
Her head falls against my shoulder, her belly squished tightly between us, as we breathe heavily through our recovery from what will surely be one of our most cherished encounters.
She giggles. “Baby must have liked that. She’s kicking.”
Instantly, my hands go to her belly and—my God—I feel the most incredible thing. Gentle taps, like a light pulsating under her skin.
I close my eyes and concentrate, trying to feel every single bump, tap, or roll of the baby.
My baby.
Jesus. The freight trains just keep coming today.
She giggles again. “Can you feel her?”
“Shhh. Keep still.”
I don’t move a muscle. I want to sit here and do this… well… forever.
And I think this spot—this tree—just became my favorite place in the whole damn world.
The movements stop and I snake my arms around her. “That was fucking incredible.”
“The sex or the baby?”
“Yes,” I say with a wink.
I help her off me and wipe her up with the ruined panties that I then stuff in my pocket.
“Hey, you don’t happen to have a lighter, do you?”
She chuckles. “Why? Do you need a cigarette after that?”
I pull the crumpled letter from my pocket. “Because I need to burn this. Erase it from existence.”
She nods to the park off in the distance. “There might be one by the charcoal grills.”
We make our way over to find there is a lighter next to one. I hold it out to Ava. “Want to do the honors?”
“Gladly.”
As the letter catches fire atop the grates of the grill, I push all thoughts of who I was and what I might have done aside.
Based on everything I know about who I used to be, there’s no way I’d have cheated on her.
I feel it in my heart. Just as surely as I feel the three words inching their way toward the tip of my tongue.
But I don’t say them. Not yet.
When I do, I feel it will somehow solidify us together forever, and that requires me to be a thousand percent sure. So even though I’m close, I wait. I wait for the one thing—a sign perhaps—that will push me that last mile. Send me tumbling over the cliff. Catapult me into oblivion.
It's coming. I know it is. I can see it in her eyes. Like mirrors, they reflect the depths of everything I feel for her.