Chapter 33
THIRTY-THREE
“I took a job at a diner and started writing. Not many people knew that.
Poetry, mostly. A few were even published.”
—excerpt from the unpublished memoir,
Darling, I Must Say by Gloria Hayes
After a restless night of sleep, during which I did not recount every second of the past weekend, analyze every single moment I’d spent with Abe, or agonize over that long, uncomfortable ride home, I dragged myself out of bed and headed into work.
I got to the Sit-n-Eat a half hour before my normal starting time for our staff meeting.
It seemed kind of silly seeing as how the entire staff consisted of Ellie, Gil (Ellie’s husband and part owner), Jorge (who did all the cooking), and me.
Ellie’s little boy, Oliver, high-fived me when I passed the booth he was sprawled in. He was about Hallie’s age, and I decided I’d try to get the two of them together. Did nine-year-olds still do playdates? At nine, I’d been letting myself into an empty house after school.
“Oh, good, you’re here. Let’s get this party started,” Ellie said, already vibrating with energy. She was a morning person, which should have been a felony.
I grunted and headed straight for the coffee. After filling up my cup, I carefully debated which muffin I wanted from the tray Ellie had set out. Perks of having to get up earlier involved baked goods. There was that.
After settling on double chocolate chip, I slid into the chair next to Gil, who nodded a greeting.
Gil wasn’t much of a talker or a smiler, so a nod was his version of an enthusiastic greeting.
Ellie and Gil were another couple that fascinated me.
Total opposites, these two, and yet so much in love, it was palpable.
“Yo, Iris,” Jorge said from across the table. He had big dad energy which he’d earned the hard way. He and his wife had six kids.
Ellie clapped to get our attention. “We only have twenty minutes so let’s get to it.”
She spent the next fifteen minutes going over odds and ends, any changes in the menu, or monthly specials coming up the next week.
“And, once again, I would like to remind everyone that yelling at customers is not a great look.” Ellie’s gaze seemed to zone in on me.
I looked up from my muffin. “I haven’t yelled at anyone in weeks.”
“Not you.” Her eyes drifted over to her husband. “Customers are how we make money. We don’t want to scare them away.”
“Even the idiots?” Gil grumbled.
“I’m with Gil on this one,” I said, brushing crumbs off my shirt.
“Even the idiots,” Ellie said firmly. “Unless it’s Peter Stone.”
Every town has to have a villain, and Peter filled that role with excellence. “That’s fair.”
Ellie talked about a few more things—much of which had little bearing on the Sit-n-Eat but followed a train of thought that we didn’t have tickets for.
That brain of hers brained really hard, I’ll say that.
She started out excited about a new muffin recipe and ended on the pros of miniature horses.
Just when I thought it was over and I could slink off and prepare myself for the day, she dropped a bomb.
“Since Iris is leaving at the end of the summer, I’ve started looking for her replacement. I’d like them to start soon so Iris can train them.”
My spine snapped straight. “Wait. What?”
“You’re leaving for school soon. We’ll need to replace you.” She frowned. “Well, not you exactly. You are irreplaceable.”
“It’s gonna be hard to find someone who talks back to the customers so much,” Jorge said with a laugh.
“Exactly.” Ellie nodded. “We’ll miss you. But we need the help. I can’t run this place on my own.”
Gil cleared his throat.
“I mean, Gil and I can’t run this place on our own. You know Gil isn’t supposed to deal with the customers.” Gil wasn’t exactly a people person. He’d help in a pinch, but he mostly stuck to the back and the business end.
A fissure of panic snaked down my back and I rubbed my palms on my thighs. I really, really needed to figure my life out. “I haven’t put in my notice.”
Ellie waved a hand. “Please. We all know you’re going. I want to find someone who can fill your shoes.” She winced. “I don’t mean your actual shoes. Your shoes are… unfillable. We just need a new server with their own shoes, okay?”
“Sure.” I nodded dumbly.
After the meeting ended, instead of hiding in the corner in silence, I asked if I could talk to Ellie in private. We holed up in her tiny office. There was just enough for a desk and two chairs. I plopped down on one of them.
“What’s up?” Ellie asked.
I swallowed. “Is there such a thing as employer-employee confidentiality? Like lawyers?”
She leaned forward and stacked her arms on the desk. “Sure.”
“You promise?”
“Scout’s honor.”
“Okay.” I took a deep breath and blurted it out. “I’m not going to Austin in the fall.”
She frowned. “But Mae has been talking about it for months now.”
“I haven’t quite told Mae yet.”
“But why?”
“I don’t want to get a counseling degree.
I don’t want to live in Austin. But I also don’t have any idea what I’m supposed to do.
Because I know she’ll be disappointed.” Not that she’d ever say that to my face.
Instead, she’ll say she’s fine, but she’ll make that face with the sad eyes that will haunt me for months.
“I wanted to have a plan before I told her. It’s just taking a little longer to get the plan… in order.”
“Oh, honey, you could never disappoint her. She loves you,” she said in a gentle voice.
“You don’t get it. She’s excited about this and, I don’t know, I let it go for too long and now she’s dealing with moving to Chicago…” I slumped and stared at my hands. “I feel like it’s not going to go well when I tell her.”
Ellie stood and rounded her desk. Leaning on the edge in front of me, she gave me a steady, thoughtful look. “Listen, I know something about disappointing people. But if they’re the kind of people who love you, they’ll get over it. Mae will understand.”
“You say that like it’s easy.”
“Maybe the hard part is the prospect of having a real conversation.” She waved a hand between us. “I think this is the most honest you’ve ever been with me.”
“I’m honest with you,” I lied.
She smirked. “Eventually you have to realize you get to make the choices about your life. Sometimes that means disappointing people. But if those people give up on you from something like that? They were never your people to begin with.”
“So, what you’re saying is I have to be all honest and vulnerable with Mae?”
“Exactly.”
I groaned. “That sounds awful.”
“Being an adult is fun.” She nudged me with her foot. “Are you sticking around Two Harts, then?”
“For now?” I said, but it sounded more like a question.
“Maybe it’s a good thing you don’t have a plan. It leaves you open to all kinds of opportunities you wouldn’t have thought about. Some of the best things in my life came after I went off script.”
Before Ellie had ended up in Two Harts, she’d lived in California where she’d been trying to find work as an actress.
As the story goes, one day, she’d had enough of the constant hustling, so she packed up her life and her three-year-old and started driving.
She’d stopped in Two Harts to see her brother before heading to her parents’ home in Oklahoma.
Instead, she got a job at the Sit-n-Eat and never left.
“I’m not really a ‘go off script’ kind of woman,” I said.
She shrugged. “You never know. I’m not saying you should hop in your car and drive a couple of thousand miles but maybe doing something unexpected and out of character is what you need. It might help you figure things out.”
I loved Ellie, really I did. But, no, thank you. All I wanted was to figure out my next step, not join a cult on a whim.
“Yeah, I’ll think about that.” I stood. “Thanks for, you know, whatever this was.”
“Being a friend?”
“That, yes. Thanks.” I bit my lip. “And thanks for letting me keep my job for now.”
“Of course. Besides, I was worried I’d never be able to find someone with your charm and sunny disposition.” She was still laughing when I left the office.