Chapter Nineteen
Elio
It was simple.
I needed Street. They were skillful. Chaotic in the face of danger, but still conceivably effective. But I had never been one to rely on people before making my next move. I was beginning to lean on the idea of them, becoming perturbingly dependent on their presence to get things done.
There was the fact that I wanted Elia far away from me, from this country, but a lingering sense of peace seemed to fill me, knowing he was close by.
The urge to keep him safe and shield him from danger was like a bow to a violin—still, him being close was messing with things.
And him being attached to a person who attracted danger like a moth to a flame was worse than him being close to me.
I didn’t know who she was, but I knew she was someone. Someone bold enough to kill the second-in-command of a pernicious family and show no remorse or fear—it put me on guard. It was a symptomatic sign that I had to cut her off. She was a threat. A threat to me and a threat to my brother’s life.
She had to go.
Zahra’s hand pulled at my wrist in an attempt to break my grip on her neck.
Her face scrunched tight, trying to hold her breath and survive.
The sheer determination she gave off was impressive.
She’d been trained for this too. It was painfully obvious how she’d lasted this long, but I knew she was at her breaking point.
I allowed her a chance for a little hope, and she sprang up to fight me, resurfacing a couple of times, but I pushed her back under, her hands tangling with mine, her body slow from the fight and pull of the water.
A struggle she was failing to keep up.
My grip tightened, and her eyes widened, mouth falling open.
“There we go,” I whispered, watching the bubbles from her mouth rush up and fade. “Don’t fight it,” I said, holding firm through every jerk of her struggle until it stopped. Until her grip loosened from my wrist. Until no sound of struggling or rippling water was heard, and it was just … silence.
I looked up, blew out a breath, and yanked her body back up to the surface, signaling to one of the soldiers as he rushed towards me. I grunted, lifting her heavy unconscious body from the pool, the soldier assisting in pulling her out completely, laying her beside the pool.
I brushed my hair back with both hands before getting out of the water, drenched and dripping from head to toe, my clothes sticking to me like a second skin.
I signaled to another soldier. “Turn the cameras back on,” I said before turning to the other soldier, who had assisted in lifting her body from the pool.
“Make it seem like she drowned, and you tried to revive her. Do not exert effort; I want her to stay dead,” I said to the soldier, who dutifully went to his knees, pumping her chest with little effort.
With one hand working on the buttons of my shirt, I made my way back to the gazebo, skin biting with irritation at what I’d just put myself through, at the unconscious step I had taken towards being exactly like my father.
My skin crawled, and the distinct need to punish myself pulsed through my veins.
I shook my head of the sickening thoughts just as coughs and sputter sounds came from behind me, followed by strings of panicked curses from the soldier.
I halted, a frown dragging down my brows as I slowly turned towards the pool. She was awake, coughing up water, her hand pressing at her throat as the soldier watched in surprise.
Anger. Burning, flaming, hot, obdurate anger flooded my veins. “What part of ‘do not exert effort’ don’t you understand, estúpido!”
“I didn’t—she just—I—”
Groaning, I headed faster for the gazebo and grabbed my gun, walking back towards them.
“Step away,” I gritted, and the man removed himself immediately.
I stared down at the nuisance. Her breathing was ragged as her eyelids fluttered shut and open in a battle to stay awake.
“I hoped the water would kill you, but I guess your lungs aren’t as weak as I thought,” I said, pointing the gun directly at her forehead.
Her gaze flickered to the gun, and then to me. “What is this—more foreplay?”
“In honesty, part of me was hoping that I’d get to kill you this way.”
She watched me through half-closed eyes, her lips lifting to the side with a breathy laugh. “Aw, c-can’t do it like Daddy, or is this you stalling?”
I detested the little truth in her observation. “I am not my father, and I am not stalling.”
“Okay—cool, anytime now.”
Provoked, I disengaged the gun’s safety, seconds away from pulling the trigger when the exit door burst open, and Elia stopped short at the sight in front of him.
I sighed, shaking my head.
“This thing called … luck,” she whispered with a scoff.
Ignoring me, Elia rushed towards us, immediately getting to his knees and lifting Zahra’s body so her back was to his chest. “Hey, are you okay?”
“Peachy,” she answered weakly.
“Get away from her, Elia. She’s not who you think she is,” I said, still pointing the gun at her head.
Elia raised his head, and I was met with a fury similar to mine. “Fuck off,” he gritted.
“Do not make me repeat it.”
Ensuring Zahra was okay, he got to his feet, his anger-filled eyes dead set on me. “First off, don’t talk to me like I’m a fucking child, and secondly, how the fuck could you do this? What the hell did she do to you?”
“She killed without reason, put you in danger—”
“Are you listening to yourself? Dion almost hurt her; it was self-defense,” he bit back, and I almost pulled the trigger then and there, hating how she had manipulated him, how she had him wrapped around her little finger.
“Elia, she has you fooled, believe me—”
“Believe you? Why the fuck should I believe you?” he yelled. “What reason do I have to believe any fucking word that comes out of your mouth.” He shook his head, staring at me like I was a stranger. “You shouldn’t have done this—you shouldn’t have touched her, you sick bastard.”
“Open your eyes, Elia; you’re dancing to her tune.
She confessed to me. She told me she killed him because she had a score to settle with him.
I have only ever been honest with you, except when it concerns your safety.
Otherwise, I would never directly put you in harm’s way, and that is what I would be doing if I let her live. She is bad for you, Elia.”
He shook his head. “I would take her lies over yours any day, anytime. I would take her bad over yours even in fucking death. There is absolutely nothing you could say to change my mind.”
I hardened my features, knowing I couldn’t be soft on him. It had never worked.
“Move out of the way, Elia.”
He stepped closer. “I’m not letting you touch her.”
“Okay.” I raised the gun, pointing it right at him; the shock in his eyes had my arms feeling too weak to even hold up the gun, but I held firm. “You either step away, or I kill you first and then kill her right after.”
Elia’s gaze shifted to the gun in my hand and then to my eyes. “Bullshit,” he said.
I tilted my head to the side. “I adore your faith in me, truly, but the last thing you should do is test me, Elia.”
“You can’t do it,” he said.
“You think?” I asked.
“I know,” he seethed. “You’re all fucking talk when it comes to me. Weak and incompetent.”
“I’d watch my mouth if I were you,” I warned.
“You could never do it,” he continued. “All those years ago, you couldn’t do it—”
“Stop. Talking.” The gun shook in my hand.
“Why? Because it’s the truth? Because deep down, you’re still that weak fucker who got beat around by his dear old dad?”
“Shut up, Elia.” My breathing spiked.
“What did it?” he asked.
“Devil, stop.” Zahra’s attempt to stop him was a failure too.
“Tell me, what made you completely flip over? What turned you into him? Was it the thrill you got after murdering your whole family? Did you love your mother’s scream while you stabbed her? Or Mariana’s and Lorenzo’s tortured wails while you fucking burned them alive.”
My grip tightened on the gun. “Stop.”
“Why? Be fucking honest with yourself, Elio; killing me would be your last tipping point, so fucking do it because I know you want to.” He stepped closer to me.
“I don’t know why I didn’t see it before, but it’s clear now that me being alive is the only delusion you have of being a good person, but you’re not.
You’re the one who needs to open your eyes, Elio.
You didn’t kill me, but you were ready to let me die just so you could please him.
You think I don’t remember what you did to me?
Admit it. I’m alive because I’m the only physical trophy for the one good thing you have ever done. ”
My hand shook again, his words reaching straight to my heart. “Don’t fucking degrade it,” I said, my chest burning. “Don’t fucking make it sound meaningless!” The yell racked my whole body, and I dropped the gun. “It took everything from me, you ungrateful bastard—everything!”
It was foolish doing this in front of Zahra or the soldiers who lingered by, but I was too riled up, hurt by his words and assumptions of me.
“It took my whole life from me! I didn’t kill you, but what I did”—my voice broke, my eyes burned—“the lengths I went to for your protection, took my whole life from me, so don’t fucking stand here and make my life more meaningless than it already is!”
Elia took a step back, a stunned expression on his face.
“Talk nonsense about me burning Mariana and Lorenzo alive; talk about me stabbing my mother; I’ll take it all, but don’t you dare question or degrade what I did for you. I’ll take it from anyone but not you. Not you, Elia.”
He did not attempt to say anything.
My gaze flickered to Zahra and then him.
I blinked away the sting in my eyes, and sniffed, “Go … take her away. When she turns out to betray you, don’t say I didn’t try to warn you.
” I turned my attention to Zahra, remorse and the same regretful look in her eyes.
“And you, stay clear of me because I swear to God, one more fucking problem from you, and this little drowning thing will seem like a walk in the park.”
With that, I snapped my fingers to one of the soldiers, and he rushed to me as I made my way towards the exit. “Drain the pool, and clean it thoroughly. Take my things from the gazebo and bring them to me.”
“Yes, Marino.”
I stopped. “Everything that happened here stays here.”
“The cameras were on, sir; it directly sent feeds to your home lounge, sir.”
“Wipe it. No use.”
“Sir, Casmiro was in your home lounge, sir.”
I clenched my jaw. “Make sure those two get to their quarters without trouble.”
“Yes, Marino.”
I walked away without a glance at them. The need to punish myself had vanished—no, it had been sated. The only person I loved hated me; the only person I lived for saw me as everyone else did.
That was the worst punishment I could ever get. It was both physical and emotional, and I held on to it, held on to that feeling like it was the very ice the burn in my chest needed.
I held on to Elia’s hate for me. It was all I’d ever wanted anyway; I just never thought it would feel even worse than the thought of dying.