Chapter 3
Garnham Manor no longer welcomed her.
The house that she had called her home for so long, the place where she had been born and raised, had been taken from her. The library did not hold the warm welcome of her father, music from the piano forte did not drift toward her as she approached the drawing room.
The portraits on the walls observed her with a quiet detachment, the servants themselves appeared a little uneasy in her presence—save for Margaret, of course.
Perhaps it was simply in her own mind that she found herself drifting away from her home, as if she had already brought to mind that this place was no longer hers and hers alone.
It belonged now to the baronet.
“My dear Rose.”
Rose turned, then rose quickly as her dear friend, Sophia, was shown into the room. “Oh, Sophia,” she exclaimed, hurrying across the floor to embrace her. “I am so very glad to see you.”
“As I am you.” Sophia clasped Rose’s hands in hers, looking at her carefully. “You did very well at the funerals.”
A heavy weight sank into Rose’s stomach.
The funeral of her mother and her father had taken place some three days earlier though she had succeeded in making her way through them without losing her composure.
“It was difficult,” she murmured, drawing Sophia into the room and gesturing for her to sit down wherever she chose.
“I feared that I would break into sob sat any moment and would not be able to recover sufficiently to continue.”
“But you did not,” Sophia replied as Rose rang the bell. “That was very well done.”
Rose said nothing, giving her friend only the smallest of nods as she sat down opposite her, searching Sophia’s face. There was some more news to import but even the thought of it was causing her tremendous struggle.
“Might I ask if Sir Beaumont is at home?” Sophia asked, her expression darkening. “I know that he is to take on your father’s title. I presume he will also take on this house and estate?”
Rose nodded slowly, clasping her hands in front of her. “I must depart this house for it now belongs to him,” she said slowly as Sophia’s eyes flared wide. “He saw my grief and struggle on the day of the funeral, but there was no sense of sympathy nor compassion. He barely said even a word to me.”
Sophia’s eyes rounded just as the tea tray was taken in. “But that is cruel!” she exclaimed as the tea things were set out. “Surely he cannot be so unfeeling.”
“I believe he now thinks only of the estate, the title, and his future,” Rose said heavily.
“Though my father—” She stopped, battling against the tightness in her throat.
“My father had more difficulties than I was aware of, Sophia.” Seeing her friend’s eyebrow lift slightly, she spread out her hands.
“He had a good deal of financial struggle that I was not aware of. In short, I have very little hope for a secure future.”
For a long moment, there was nothing but silence.
Sophia gazed at Rose without blinking, shock wrapping across her expression as Rose let out a long, slow breath and then reached to pour the tea.
There was nothing more to be done and nothing more to be said.
The truth had settled on her with a strength that she was powerless to fight against.
“Whatever shall you do?” Sophia’s voice was thin, her face paling. “You cannot be left out in the cold, surely? I am sure that father would offer you refuge for a time, if the baronet will not.”
Rose gave her friend a faint smile. “You are very kind, but I could not trespass on yours or anyone’s kindness for long.
Many will think that if the baronet, a distant relation of mine, will not care for me, then they have no responsibility to do so either.
In that, they might well be correct, but all the same, I have no choice but to take steps toward my own future.
” She picked up her tea and took a sip, hoping it would fortify her somewhat, only for Sophia to lean forward, reaching across the small table separating them to grasp her hand.
“I cannot bear to see you in such distress,” she said, tears in her eyes.
“To have not only lost your mother and your father but then to step away from your house must be utterly devastating.” She shook her head.
“To my mind, the baronet should be doing a good deal more and if there was anything I could do to alter your circumstances, I would do it in a moment.”
Rose squeezed her hand in return, then watched as Sophia sat back, pulling out a handkerchief to dab at her eyes. “I am grateful for your friendship and solidarity, Sophia. I shall miss you.”
Sophia’s eyes widened in an instant. “Miss me? Then you… you are leaving?”
“I have no choice.” Rose spread out her hands, her eyes closing briefly as anxiety bit down, hard.
“Margaret, my maid, suggested that I use my education to become a governess, and, after some time, I realized that her advice led to the path I ought to follow.” She tried to speak clearly, without emotion hindering her, but found she could not.
“I have already applied to an urgent advertisement and received word only this morning.” Sniffing, she reached for her tea again, struggling to look Sophia in the face.
“I am to meet with the Duchess of Camberley tomorrow, in the hopes that I can secure my position as governess to her grandson.”
There was nothing but a stunned silence as Rose sipped at her tea and watched her friend do her utmost to hide her shock. Sophia did not say a word for some minutes, looking down at her lap as if it would have answers for her, only to shake her head and click her tongue loudly.
“This is monstrous, Rose. You should not have to leave your own home, should not have to find employment.”
“And yet, I shall go,” Rose replied softly.
“Believe me, I was quite against it when Margaret first brought it to my attention, but I see now that there is no other path for me. I shall even have to drop my title if I am to begin such a position. A duke would never hire the daughter of an earl for a governess for fear that scandal might be attached to my presence in his house. Indeed, even if he were to know of it, perhaps whispers about my father’s financial debts would encourage him not to even consider me.
It is not what I wish to do but I see no other choice. ”
Sophia pressed her handkerchief to the corners of her eyes again. “It is too much for you, Rose. However shall you endure?”
“I shall endure because I must.” The words were stronger than she truly felt, but Rose spoke them regardless, driving them into her very soul. “I have no other choice for there is no one left to care for me. Thus, I must care for myself.”
Her friend regarded her quietly.
“I shall become Miss Rose Bennett,” Rose continued, though her voice wavered slightly. “Both my father and mother are deceased, leaving me without family support. Consequently, I have sought employment to ensure my stability.”
Sophia nodded. “You sound entirely respectable, Rose. The details are close to the truth, however.”
Rose’s throat ached as she looked away. “It will be easier to remember that way.”
A single tear fell to Sophia’s cheek. “I do not want you to go, Rose.”
A dull, tight laugh broke from Rose’s throat. “Nor do I,” she answered, truthfully. “But I must. There is no other choice left for me, and indeed, if I had not this, then I would not know what to do.”
Her friend wiped away her tears and regarded Rose steadily.
“You must write to me frequently,” she said, a firmness in her voice that told Rose she would not accept any argument to the contrary.
“You will inform me of your progress and your success and if, for any reason, there is anything wrong or of concern, you will come to reside with me for a time, until another solution can be found. You must promise me that, Rose.”
Rose, who knew that Sophia’s father would not take kindly to her unexpected presence at his house, had no other choice but to agree. “I shall,” she swore, putting her hand to her heart. “But pray, in the meantime, that I shall not fail.”
--
It was some two days later that Rose found herself on the stone steps of Camberley House, the air cold and the sky clouded—much like her heart.
Her hands were clammy, her body weary from the journey that the baronet had begrudgingly paid for, though he had not given her any money to return should she require it.
Dressed in a dark, plain gown with no ostentation, she clasped her hands in front of her as her fair curls danced lightly in the wind. The bonnet she wore was dull and without decoration, a lace cap ready and prepared for her should she be given the position.
She scarcely recognized herself.
“Yes?” The butler’s words were not clothed in welcome, nor was his expression in any way warm. He looked her up and down, a frown pulling his brows together as she licked her lips and tried to remind herself of how a governess might speak.
“Good morning,” she said, bobbing a curtsy that she could not be certain was required. “My name is Miss Rose Bennet, and I am here to speak with the Duchess of Camberley. For the position of governess, you understand.”
“I see.” The butler pulled the door back, allowing her space to step inside. “The duchess is in the drawing room at present. Do follow me.”
Rose did so without question, following after the butler with her head slightly bowed, allowing herself a quick glance here and there at the house itself.
It was one of the largest houses she had ever seen, the windows throwing vast amounts of light into the hallway. Rose could not even imagine how bright it must be when the sun came through.