Chapter 70 After the Storm, Eve
AFTER THE STORM, EVE
I remain kneeling like an obedient human pet as the sound of engines fades into the distance. I can’t breathe. My vision blurs, and the floor begins to shift. What just happened? How are they gone already? How could I just kneel here and let them walk away without even trying to run or beg?
Oh my God. I am a pet now.
That’s what they have made of me!
The realization makes me even dizzier.
Gai touches the top of my head to steady me. “You need rest, Eve. Today was hard, but Tribune Jin Kol seemed satisfied with your progress. Well done. Return to your room. Autumn will help you. I will have some elixir sent up."
I don’t ask what elixir is. I just walk with Autumn supporting me to our room. We don’t even brush our teeth or hair but just go directly to our mats and lay down. My mind is a nightmare running on repeat of what just happened today.
Soon a servant enters with two glasses of a light blue drink.
Autumn and I each take one. It tastes minty, but delicious compared to what we are usually given, water, so I quickly drink it all without thinking about what could be in it.
When we finish, the servant leaves, and Autumn and I lay in the dark alone.
After a few minutes, Autumn says, “That was a drug to make us not care about anything. It’s to make you not care about what you endured today, and for me to not feel sorry for you.”
“Do you think it works?”
“Yes, but only for a few days. Then we will both remember every detail of today until something worse happens to take its place.”
“And do you feel sorry for me?”
Autumn turns and looks at me, but I can only make out some of her face in the dark. Then she grabs my hand. “I wouldn’t be human if I didn’t. Even if I hated you, I would have to be a complete psychopath to be untouched by what I witnessed today.”
“Do you hate me?”
She laughs. “No. You know I don’t. But I am jealous.”
“Why?”
“Rafe and Lorian are going to get you out of this.”
“Why do you say that?” I ask, afraid even to hope.
“I could tell by the look in their eyes.”
“I think you just want me gone so you don’t have to share a room anymore,” I say, surprising myself with my joke. I guess the elixir is working.
“No,” she says. “It’s more than that. They were talking at dinner about some legal loopholes, it didn’t apply to humans, but… oh, this elixir, it also makes it difficult to think. But I know you couldn’t understand. In fact, I felt like Rafe was purposely using words you wouldn’t understand.”
“He wouldn’t want me to hope,” I say.
She squeezes my hand and then lets go and pulls back.
“If you want to talk about what happened today—I mean when you remember it with the emotional intensity you should, and you will—you can talk to me. I haven’t experienced exactly what you did, but I’ve experienced some things, with my body and mind, that are comparable, and I survived. And so will you.”
“Thank you,” I say and oddly feel fine as I close my eyes and think about Rafe and Lorian.
I run my fingers up and down my arms, remembering the way they used to caress me.
Not like today, but before. When we all could be our private selves.
The way they would take turns loving me as if I was someone they could never live without.
I have never been invisible to them. Even today, I wasn’t invisible…
or is that just the elixir guiding my thoughts?