Chapter 18
Ellie
As Reid and I enter the dining hall for our midday break, I search the room for Alexis.
Every bench is full, but less chatter fills the air than normal.
The arrival of spring heralds our impending examinations, and everyone’s exhausted from their increasing workloads.
It seems to weigh especially hard on Reid, surprisingly.
He’s been growing more and more frazzled with every passing day—late to class, snippy in conversation, and constantly insisting I go to town with him when we really need to study.
Yesterday, we had an exceptionally frustrating interaction where, instead of letting me eat lunch with Alexis, he insisted I sit alone for an entire bell while he disappeared, occasionally popping back just to snap at me.
He hasn’t spoken to Alexis in the almost three weeks since they fought, and despite not wanting to get involved, it’s clear I have no choice if I want Reid to calm down and return to normal.
I find her at a table with Oliver, her date to the Equinox Ball.
A yawn slips out of my mouth as I step toward them, and I cover it with the back of my hand.
Despite all my stress, I’ve been in surprisingly good spirits lately.
Back home, painting helped me relax, but that’s impossible here.
Instead, I find myself dozing off, missing chunks of my days outside of class and studying.
But it’s working, keeping me strangely energized and more confident than ever.
I press that courage into my grip as I snag Reid’s hand and drag him directly to Alexis, skipping the food line to dodge between crowded tables.
“What are you—Stop it, let go of me!” He curses as he bumps the edge of a bench.
“No. We’re fixing whatever’s going on between you and Alexis. Now.”
He groans as I settle across from Alexis and Oliver, sitting hand-in-hand, whispering to one another. They glance over, and Alexis’s smile compresses into an icy glare the second she spots Reid. He drops onto the bench, arms crossed, looking away.
“What are you doing here?” Alexis demands, eyeing Reid.
I turn to Oliver, whose wide eyes would suggest we caught him doing something inappropriate. How can someone this timid last long with Alexis? “Sorry, could you give us a minute?”
He looks to her for guidance, and her face scrunches before she nods. He gives her a quick peck on the cheek before rushing away.
Here we go. “Now, as best I can tell, the two of you are fighting over Emmrich. Which makes no sense, because you’re with Oliver now. So make up already so Reid can stop being angry all the time.” I hold my breath, awaiting their responses.
Reid shifts his weight. “That’s not why I’m angry all the time.”
“Oh?” Did I misinterpret things? “Then why?”
His jaw clenches, then he rubs his brow. “Fine,” he mutters, shaking his head before dropping his hand to the table. “I am still annoyed with Alexis for sleeping with Emmrich.”
“Because I won?” Alexis folds her arms.
“No! It wasn’t a competition. I mean, it started out that way, but it wasn’t anymore.”
Her face softens. “Wait, you actually like him?”
Reid turns red, then he looks away.
“I thought… Then why did you want me there at all? I thought it was all just for fun.”
Reid stares at a spot on the table while rubbing it with his fingers. After a deep breath through his nostrils, he speaks. “Just because I act confident doesn’t mean I always am. It seemed easier if you were there. If it didn’t work out, I could blame you.”
It’s as if he stepped into a new light—I never would’ve imagined he wasn’t as confident as he seemed. It’s reassuring that I’m not the only one who worries about what others think.
“Reid…” I lift my hand, debating the best place to give a supportive touch, but Alexis beats me to it.
“Oh, honey.” She takes his hand with both of hers. “I’m so sorry. If I had known… You could’ve told me.”
“Yeah, whatever.” He pulls free, but meets her gaze. “He obviously wasn’t that invested. I’ll get over it.”
Alexis tilts her head, her lips pursed, then nods.
I let out a sigh of relief—I didn’t make things worse. And hopefully, Reid will be in a better mood now.
“We should get some food before our next class.” I grab my things, nudging him to get moving. I’d like to avoid things turning tense again because we’re grumpy from hunger.
“Wait,” he says. “There’s something else I need to talk to you about. It’s important.”
Alexis tilts her brow up. “Alright?”
“I can come by tonight. It’ll take a while to explain.”
“Sure. I’ll be there.”
We say our goodbyes, then Reid and I head for the food line. I grab a plate and peek ahead at today’s offerings. “What was that about?”
Reid sighs. “Caeo. It’s about you and Caeo.”
Who?
I’m about to ask Reid for clarification when my gaze lands on the dessert section, and whatever he said slips from my mind. “Oh look, they have pie today.” A cozy warmth fills me as I breathe in the aroma of clove and jam wafting through the air.
Reid trails his hand down his face as he groans. “That’s it. I’m eating alone. I’ll see you in class.” He skips ahead, cutting off some people in line ahead of us.
What’s his problem now?
* * *
I contemplate the warped wooden door, its bottom half splotchy and stained, with swollen edges where it soaks in the puddle at its base. “What are we doing here?”
Classes have ended for the week, and we stand at the entrance to a run-down hovel with gray, peeling siding. Reid’s banging so hard the door creaks with every hit.
“You said we were going somewhere I’d love.” This is the sort of place I actively avoid.
“Arandur’s stinking cheese.” Reid rubs his temple.
“In a minute you’ll be thanking me profusely, going on and on about how I’m such a good friend.
And I am, because you have no idea how difficult you’ve made my life.
I’m seconds away from telling Mallory everything just so I don’t have to deal with this anymore. ”
“Telling Mallory what? What’s going on?”
It took a lot of convincing on his part for me to join him on this outing, and I’m beginning to regret giving in. Obviously, there’s something else bothering him, something beyond his fight with Alexis, but he won’t explain what it is.
He bangs on the door again. “Come on, open up.”
I take a nervous step back. “I think I’m going to go.”
“No, just give him a minute.” Another bang. “Cay, you home?”
“Who are you talking to?”
Reid groans. “He told me to bring you here. I confirmed it the other day.” Kicking the door, he drags his hand along his face. His fingers have raked through his hair so many times it’s edging into unkempt—he barely looks like himself.
“Great,” he mumbles. “Let’s go.” He shoves his hands in his coat pockets and storms down the street, grumbling to himself.
I take a step, intending to follow, but a tug of curiosity compels me to look back at the door. An uneasy feeling simmers in my chest; there’s something familiar about this place, but I can’t place it.
Peeking through the small window, there’s not much to see: a cramped living space with a single door leading to another room, the mess of someone’s life covering the table and counters. If they were home, they would undoubtedly have heard all that banging.
My hand finds its way into my pocket, fingers slipping against a small, smooth circle.
A mother of pearl button I found tangled in my sheets as I made my bed this morning.
I checked all my blouses, but none were missing any, then shoved it into my pocket before rushing to class. Something about it… it feels important.
I catch up with Reid, passing similar decrepit shacks along the way. “Are you going to explain what that was all about?”
“I could, but it’d be a waste of breath.” He stops at the gravel intersection. “Where the fuck could he be?”
A flicker of irritation bubbles within me. “Who?”
“It doesn’t matter,” he murmurs, not even sparing me a glance.
“It does matter.” I grab his arm and force him to look at me. “You dragged me all the way out here and won’t tell me anything. Who are you looking for?”
“Cay. Caeo.”
I blink, unsure what he said. “What?”
Reid’s face tightens, wound up like a kettle on the verge of screaming. “Your boyfriend!”
My… what? My heart stutters. “I don’t have a boyfriend.”
“Yes, you do. You met him the same day you met me.” Reid yanks my bag from my shoulder and starts digging through it.
“What are you doing?” This is beyond acceptable. I reach for my bag, and Reid shoves it into my arms as he pulls out my sketchbook and starts flipping through it.
“Stop that!”
He does, holding it up to me. A page full of sketches—drawings I did when I was bored. All of the same face.
“Him.” He forces the book into my hands. “That’s him. Caeo. Your boyfriend.”
I take the book, running my fingers along the drawings. They’re surprisingly detailed compared to most of my work. A fire blooms in my chest as my eyes linger on the lines of his face. I swallow down the drought forming in my mouth.
“This is nobody. A face I drew when I was bored. He’s not a real person.”
“Caeo is real. I’ve known him my whole life, and that was his house. He’s your boyfriend, and for some reason we haven’t figured out yet, you don’t remember each other.”
My eyes locked on the drawings, I try to form some words in response, but nothing comes out. It doesn’t seem like Reid’s playing a prank on me, his frustration palpable. But the things he’s saying make little sense.
Heat blossoms within me as I take in the face. He looks like someone I could imagine being with, with his messy hair and warm smile. I flip through the pages. He appears multiple times, in varying levels of detail. There’s even a drawing of a single eye I know is his.
I glance back at Reid. He’s eyeing me expectantly, but I haven’t a clue why.
He sighs. “I need a drink.”
I slide my sketchbook back into my bag and hurry after him as he marches further into Haven.
Reid’s seething aura keeps us walking in silence, interrupted only by the sounds of our feet kicking gravel.
The air turns chillier as the sun sets, and soon after the road transitions to cobblestone, I spot the ridiculous sign for The Buttoned-Up Duck: a mallard wearing nothing but a high, frilly collar around its long neck.
“I’m surprised Alexis didn’t join us,” I say.
“I hadn’t planned on coming here. I was gonna drop you off and meet her after.”
“Drop me off where?”
“Arandur’s flaming oven.” Reid halts a few steps away from the tavern’s entrance and faces me. “You lost the entire conversation?”
“What conversation?”
He clenches his fists, then bursts into a stream of expletives while kicking the wall of the building.
Has he lost it?
I’m about to ask what’s wrong when the door to The Duck swings open. Two men stride out, cutting their conversation short when they notice Reid brutalizing the wooden siding.
“Reid?” the blond one asks.
His face is handsome, with a mischievous glint in his golden—yes, golden—eyes. He’s tied his hair in a knot behind his head, and rather than a traditional collared shirt, a burgundy scarf wraps loosely around his neck.
There’s something familiar about him. I’m certain I’ve seen him around the tavern before.
His friend is new. Taller than the rest of us, wrapped up in a dark gray coat that hides most of his clothes. His hood’s up, shrouding his face in shadow, but dark, chin-length hair frames his sharp jaw and high cheekbones.
A powerful magnetism emanates from both of them, pulling my gaze despite the heat creeping up my neck, flushing my face. I can’t look away.
Reid glances at the speaker. “Oh, fuck everything.” He slumps with his back against the building, scowling at the sky as if asking why it hates him.
“Hello, Emmrich.” His voice rings with feigned politeness. “Nice to see you.”
This is Emmrich? Interesting.
Emmrich eyes his hooded friend, who gives him a curt nod. “It’s been a while. Can we talk?”
“Sorry, you must be confusing me with my friend with tits,” Reid says, making me cringe. “If you haven’t noticed, I don’t have those.”
“What are you talking about?” Emmrich’s brow furrows.
“I know you slept with her, asshole. Get lost.”
Emmrich’s gaze shifts to me. I shrug—I’ve involved myself in Reid’s relationships enough for one day.
He turns back to Reid. “Give me a chance to explain. Please?”
Reid exhales and pushes himself off the wall. “Five minutes. But that’s it.”
Emmrich glances between me and his friend.
Does he expect us to go somewhere?
A second later, he grabs Reid’s wrist and drags him around the corner of the building, with Reid mumbling another curse before disappearing from sight.
I force a smile at Emmrich’s friend, hoping this is as awkward for him as it is for me.
I step back as a couple passes between us to enter The Duck.
“Perhaps we should move.” My new companion gestures across the street, his voice low.
I nod. “Of course. Don’t want to be in anyone’s way.”
We move to the opposite building, and he leans against its worn-down brick wall.
Forcing myself to stop gawking at him, I lean nearby, following his gaze to Emmrich and Reid, now visible from this side of the mostly empty street.
They appear to be arguing, but I can’t make out anything they’re saying.
This is getting uncomfortable.
“So, your friend’s Emmrich? I’m Ellie.”
“Taran.” He offers nothing else, but keeps his eyes fixed on Reid and Emmrich.
Taran? That’s an unusual name. “I haven’t seen you around before.”
“I’m visiting.”
After a few seconds of silence, it’s clear he won’t be elaborating.
“From where?”
Nothing.
Lovely. Someone worse at small talk than me.
Giving up, I settle for watching the others argue. Their voices don’t carry over to us so it’s not that interesting. Perhaps Taran’s also involved with Emmrich, and that’s why he’s so invested?
As if he could hear my thoughts, Emmrich glances over at us.
No—at Taran.
He nods, then Emmrich moves further into the alley, out of sight, pulling Reid with him.
What was that about? My body tenses with the realization that I’m now alone with a strange man.
He turns to face me. For the first time, I notice his eyes. A swirling, infinite green, clearer than polished emerald. My heart pounds against my ribs, pulled toward him like a tide.
“Come with me.” He holds out his hand, his voice echoing through my mind.
I find myself taking it.