23. Chapter Twenty Three Rhowyn
Chapter Twenty Three: Rhowyn
A soft knock on the door stirred me from my sleep. My first instinct was an eagerness to see Baer, recognizing him through the bond until I remembered our argument. I slammed the wall down in my heart, blocking them from the bond and my emotions, wondering how I could have been so blind. How had we gone from building something so deep to where we were now?
Sitting up, I prepared myself to see him. “Come in,” I said coldly, hoping that very little emotion entered my words.
The door opened slowly, Baer peeking his head around the frame to eye me before pushing the door wide. Leaving the door open, he walked toward me.
Not liking the fact that he towered over me from my position on the bed, I stood. “What do you want?” Shit, there was more anger in that than I'd wanted.
“I get that you're mad,” Baer started.
“Really?! What gave it away?” I snarked.
He winced at my sarcasm, rubbing a hand to his chest. “Please don't shut us out.” His eyes pleaded with me. I wanted to let him in again, to let him hold me in the safety his arms provided, but I reminded myself that I shouldn't want someone who didn't want me. He wanted a different version of me, someone I could never be or live up to.
“Why shouldn't I?”
“Because all we want is what's best for you,” he started, but I cut him off before he could say more.
“What you want is not something I can give you. What you want is not who I am,” I told him in as simple of terms as I could manage.
“Rhowyn, why wouldn't I want to protect the woman I've come to love? Why wouldn't I want to keep her safe? You're asking us to forget our instincts and to put you in a knowingly dangerous situation. You said it yourself; this is most likely a trap.”
I laughed. “How can you say that?” I asked him, unable to look at him anymore, turning to pace the room instead. “You can't love someone you don't know.”
“What do you mean? We do know you.”
“No. You don't. Because if you did know me, then there's no way you could possibly think I'd ever go along with staying behind. That there's no way I'd ever let the people I care about go off alone into that danger without me.” I paused to look at him. “So, no, Baer, you don't know me, so you can't possibly expect me to believe that you love me.”
He sighed, running his hands through his hair. “Just because I know that you don't like this idea doesn't mean I can't try to convince you to at least be safe. To consider us in this and how we feel about the whole thing.”
“Look, I get it. You don't like the idea of me getting hurt. Can't you see how hypocritical it is that you're asking me to let any of you go into that same situation? You think I want any of you getting hurt? It's me she wants. It's me who has to bear the responsibility if any of you are harmed as a result of this.
“I wish I could say I could just leave Jude behind, but I can't. He's my only family, and I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I didn't help him. He's only in this mess because of me. That's why I can't just sit here doing nothing while asking y'all to take that risk. I can't ask any of you to do what I'm not willing to do.”
“You're not asking us to do this. It's what we were chosen to do. Avalonia assigned us as your consorts, which means that we are the ones to take the risk, to protect you, and ensure that your reign as Queen is peaceful. If we get hurt, then so be it. It's our destiny to serve you.”
“I don't need you to serve me. Can't you see that?” I pleaded with him. “I need you to be by my side. I need you to support me but not hold me back. I need to do this for myself as much as to keep y'all safe. I don't want you to serve me. I want you to be my partner.”
Sighing, he pushed his hands through his hair. “I can't lose you because of this,” he admitted to me softly. “As much as it goes against all my instincts, I'll support you. I don't know if I can convince the others, but I'll try.”
His words, pulled from a tormented throat, spoke to me, moving me when I thought I was immovable. Drawn to him, I wrapped my arms around him. “That's all I ask. Be my partner, Baer. Don't hold me back.”
“Okay.” His arms wrapped around me, pulling me into his embrace, squeezing me tightly, and warming my cold demeanor. I leaned into him. He kissed the top of my head. “I'll talk to the others. I'm sure I can reason with Lennox and Arryn, but Callum will never agree to this. However, if we outvote him, he'll have no choice.”
“Thank you, Baer.” I leaned up on my tip-toes, claiming his mouth and lowering the wall to the bond, allowing him to feel how much this meant to me.
I couldn't help that I was still guarded, still wary. A part of me felt that this would be a battle that would probably keep recurring, and my instincts were screaming at me to protect my heart. However, if he could give me this, I could keep myself open to him. I would give him this trust. For now.
“Come on. I was supposed to come and get you because the contact has found us and is requesting a meeting. I just couldn't leave here with us so unstable and distracted.”
“Okay. Let me put my boots on and grab my gear, and then I'll be right out,” I told him, bending over to pull on my boots. When I stood back up, I caught Baer's eyes on my ass, and I couldn't help the small smile that crept onto my face.
Adjusting himself, he cleared his throat. “I'll just be out here.”
I grabbed my knife, sliding it into my boot before grabbing a couple of other daggers to strap into place. I'd never been one for weapons, but I wanted to be prepared for anything.
Entering the main living area, I found the guys waiting for me with varying expressions. Brannoc was still cold, Callum still angry and stubborn. Lennox was unsure, and Arryn was considering me carefully.
“Alright, we're going to meet him at the edge of the woods outside of the city. Brannoc will take us out of here, but we'll need to make our way on foot through the city and to the meeting spot. We need to conserve his magic for when we need it,” Arryn explained, the commander in him taking over.
No one argued as we circled Brannoc, letting him whisk us away. Landing outside, I was surprised to find it was already nighttime, though the streets were still bustling with activity.
Putting a finger to his lips, Arryn gestured for us to follow. Brannoc morphed into his Raven form, flying above and ahead to scout the area, communicating somehow with Arryn. Several times, Arryn held up a hand to halt our progress after glancing at Brannoc, barely missing running straight into the city guards. Slowly but surely, we made our way out of the city, keeping low as we darted across the open field that separated the woods from the city.
After what felt like hours, my nerves zinging in anticipation, we arrived at what Arryn knew to be the meeting spot. None of us dared to speak aloud, the quiet night oppressive around us as we waited. In the silence, every noise seemed to be magnified. Every rustling of the bushes, every chirp or creak of limbs, had me jumping at shadows.
Brannoc remained in Raven form, landing on a branch about twenty feet away, his head tilted to watch us. The guys were all alert but not as jittery as me. Clearly, they had the training to remain calm. This was all new to me, almost surreal in many ways.
Time ticked past, and I slowly started to relax. Looking at Arryn, I shrugged my shoulders, questioning where this contact was. A tingle ran down my spine, and I whirled just as a man appeared behind me. I squeaked in surprise, too scared to even scream properly, stumbling away from the mysterious man until my back met Arryn's chest, his arm wrapping around my middle to secure me and keep me from falling on my ass.
“Who are you?” Arryn asked, his voice promising violence for any answer he didn't like. Shit, why did that turn me on so much?
Needing some distance from the distracting thoughts, I pushed away from Arryn, standing slightly in front of him, the others forming a semi-circle behind and around me but allowing me to remain in charge. I studied the man as we waited for his answer. His smile promised all sorts of trouble, his shaggy brown hair falling messily into his eyes. He was shorter than my guys but still taller than my short human form.
“Gorn sent me,” he teased.
“You're Gorn's contact?” Arryn asked.
“Aye. He said you might have a use for my skills.”
All of my men were now tense as I remained relaxed. Something told me we could trust this man. “And what skills exactly can you provide?” I asked him.
He laughed. “Well, for starters, I'm a Puca,” he stated proudly as if that name should mean something to me.
At my puzzled look, Callum explained, “They're tricksters.”
“Now, now. No need to be hostile,” the Puca said to Callum with a chuckle, obviously unconcerned by the promised violence in Callum's narrowed gaze. Turning to me, he said, “While my kind do enjoy a little mischief every now and then, we're also the most adept at illusions.” He winked at me, smiling proudly at his declaration.
Eyeing me, he stepped closer, earning a growl of warning from Callum. “Although, I'm not quite sure why you need me. It seems your glamor is quite a masterpiece in and of itself.”
“My glamor is not something I can claim credit for,” I told him. “Apparently, someone else placed it on me, and it can't be undone.”
Tilting his head, he studied me, stepping so far into my personal space that my men moved to try and pull him back. But he didn't touch me; instead, he leaned forward with a deep inhale, sniffing me.
Stepping back before Callum could get his hands on him, he said, “I can see now that the signature is indeed not your own. A shame, really, because it's such a work of art. I'd like to meet the fae responsible for it. It's one of the best glamors I've ever encountered.”
“You and me both. Except I'd like the creator to break it.”
“Is that what you folk need from me? To break this glamor?” he asked, a hand going to his chin in consideration as he looked me up and down. “If so, I'm sorry to say I won't be of much service.”
“That's not what we're needing. We need your assistance in another matter but we are wondering what it will cost us and if we can trust you?” I murmured, not taking my eyes off the Puca in front of me.
“Well, the cost depends on the work involved. As for whether or not you can trust me, that is for you to decide. However, I am willing to enter into a fae deal if secrecy is what you require?”
“A fae deal?”
“A deal between fae that is unbreakable, bound by magic. If either party fails to fulfill their end, Avalonia ensures they will regret it, stripping the guilty party's magic until they are left completely without,” Arryn explained.
“Why would you enter into such a deal so easily?” I questioned him.
“Something tells me this assignment will be one of my greatest accomplishments. Besides, I'm simply entering into a vow of secrecy. I'm not agreeing to take the job yet. I can still walk away, both of us sure that neither would speak of this moment.”
Not waiting for the guys, I held out my hand as if to shake the Puca's hand. “Okay. I'll take the deal.”
“No, you won't. I'll take it,” Callum said, shoving me back. He sliced his hand as the Puca did the same, clasping each other's forearms as I felt the magic snap into place, binding us to the fae deal of secrecy.
“What is your name?” I asked, just realizing he hadn't told us that.
“Ah. A name, such a tricky thing. For these purposes, you may call me Loki.”
“Obviously that's not your name, but okay. Loki, we require your assistance with a jailbreak,” I told him.
“Intriguing.” He smiled broadly. “Who are we breaking out? Did one of your friends get a little too drunk and now needs help getting out of the clinker?”
“It's a little more than that,” I warned him. “We're needing help with getting into the dungeons. We need to rescue Master Jude.”
For the first time, Loki looked as if he had been rocked by this information. His smile fell, eyes widening in shock. “That's nigh on impossible, lass. Even with my help, it's too dangerous,” he started.
I cut him off, having figured him out already. “Oh, but think of it now. The bragging rights you'll have afterward. You'll have successfully taken part in the one and only escape from the Queen's own dungeons. After this, you’ll be able to charge anything you want. Everyone would love to have such an accomplished Puca to help them.”
“True. True. That all sounds well and good, but if I do help you, it won't be cheap. This is risky. I'll need to ensure it's worth my while.”
“What's your price?” I asked him, hoping against hope that it was a price we could pay.
“A favor.”
“Absolutely not!” Arryn exclaimed.
“What's wrong with that?” I asked. I mean, I wasn't on board with it yet, but it seemed harmless enough.
“An open favor is a fae deal. You'll be bound to complete the favor, no matter what it is, at risk of losing your magic if you don’t comply,” Arryn explained to me.
“I'll pay it,” Lennox stepped forward.
“Nah, uh, uh,” Loki said, eyeing me. “It will need to be with you, Rhowyn, Chosen of Avalonia.”
“That's not going to happen,” Callum growled out, his hand going to the sword at his hip.
“It's my price. If you want my help, she'll need to owe me a favor.”
“What kind of favor?” I asked.
“One that I haven't decided upon yet. It'll be handy to have one from the future Queen.” Willing to do anything to save my grandfather, I opened my mouth, preparing to agree to the deal, but Brannoc swooped in. He changed from Raven to man fluidly, appearing in front of me and sending Loki stumbling back from him.
“I will take that deal. You and I both know, Puca, that a favor from a Raven is highly prized. Even more so than a Queen.”
“Deal,” Loki agreed, scrambling forward in eagerness, the two of them sealing the deal before I could even speak up. Magic snapped out from them with enough force to send us all stumbling back.
What kind of deal had Brannoc just saved me from?