Chapter 4
Ididn’t sleep much last night, but that makes five nights in a row. Ever since Teeny came over and had dinner with me, I can’t get her out of my mind. I spend my days staring out the peephole and trying to catch a glimpse of her.
When she was here we didn’t talk much, or at least I didn’t. She told me about how she designs stuffed animals for a living and how busy she is. I’d never heard of something like that, but apparently it’s a big business. I loved seeing how excited and animated she was while she talked and how she probably said more words in one night than I had in a whole month.
After dinner I walked her to the door and she thanked me for a fun night. There was a moment of hesitation when I wanted to lean down and kiss her, but then I chickened out. I sent her dinner as a welcome home sort of thing and she was probably just being polite after the order got screwed up. I’m sure she couldn’t wait to get out of here and back across the hall.
Who would want to hang out with someone who doesn’t have much to say? She asked me about myself, but I’m sure a few mumbled answers here and there were far from enough to leave her wanting more. I felt like such an idiot the second she walked out the door.
When I finish with my last set of weights I put the bar down and grab my towel. I wipe the sweat off my brow and then go into the kitchen to grab some water. It only takes me a second before I’m at my door and looking out to see if she’s there. When there’s no sign of her I sigh and walk away.
I glance at the counter of my kitchen at all the bread I made last night when I couldn’t sleep. Being at home all day by myself can get boring, but last year I taught myself how to make bread and I’m pretty good at it. I think it’s because the kneading is so easy. I made four different loaves and I set one to the side thinking I’d take one to Teeny if I saw her.
It seems as though I’m going to have to go knock on her door since I can’t make it seem like an accident that we’ve run into one another. I don’t leave much, so it really would have been a miracle if it happened.
I take a quick shower and pull on some shorts and a T-shirt. It feels itchy against my skin because I’m not used to wearing them that often. But I think showing up shirtless would a bit more frightening, and I don’t want things between us to be awkward. I had a nice time with her the other night and I should have said something to her the next day. But years of insecurity have convinced me that no one could possibly be attracted to me.
I made the bread as an excuse to see her again, but also to see if the other night was just a sympathy meal or if she really had a nice time. There’s only one way to find out.
With one more steadying breath I grab the parmesan bread and open my door. I’m shocked and a little flustered when I see her door open and Teeny steps out at the same exact time.
“Bull!” she says loudly, and she could knock me over with a feather at how sweetly she looks at me.
“Hey,” I say as I take a step towards her. “It’s been a few days-”
“I missed you,” she blurts out. “I mean, I’ve missed seeing you around,” she says and then looks at the ground nervously. “You don’t come out much, but not that I’ve been watching or anything. But I’ve been in and out and haven’t seen you. Do you get out much? I guess not with all the work you’re doing.” She starts to fan herself and her cheeks are red. “Is it hot in here?”
I laugh. “Yeah, it’s warming up.” I duck my chin and then remember I’m holding a present for her. “I made you this.”
I hold out the loaf of bread and she grabs it from me eagerly.
“You made this? Are you kidding me?” Her eyes are bright and wide as she looks up at me.
I nod and then shrug. “It’s not hard.”
“This looks so fancy. It smells so good, too,” she says, pulling away the paper I had wrapped around it and bringing it to her nose. “Thank you so much.” She looks down at it and then back to me. “I’d ask you to come inside and have some but—”
“No, that’s fine. You’re busy,” I say as I begin to walk backwards away from her. Suddenly I feel like a complete fool for even trying. Gah, why would a pretty girl like her give me the time of day?
“Actually I’m just on my way to the store. I’m out of so many things and I’ve been living off those Chinese leftovers for far too long,” She says, and I realize I should have sent her dinner again these past few days. “Do you want to come with me?”
“Me?” I ask and look behind me.
She giggles and nods. “Yeah, I’m just going to the store at the end of the block. It’s a beautiful day and I was going to walk.”
“Okay yeah.” I wonder if I agree too quickly as I grab my key and lock my door.
She takes the bread I made her into her apartment before she locks her door and we walk to the end of the hall.
“Sorry, I’ve got to take the stairs. I can meet you down in the lobby,” I say as I point to the door beside the elevator.
“Why?” she asks when she looks at it.
“I’m too big,” I say with embarrassment. I shove my hands in my pockets and walk to the door and I feel her small hand wrap around my forearm.
“It’s only a couple of flights. I could use the exercise,” She says.
“You don’t need anything,” I say as I look down her small curvy body.
My thick cock hangs hard between my legs and I have to remind myself to calm down before I scare her away.
“That’s sweet of you to say,” she says while we walk down the stairs and out into the lobby.
“It’s just the truth.” I keep my hands in my pockets so I don’t reach for her, but when we go outside I feel her small hand on my forearm again.
The sidewalk is busy and I know she’s just doing it to keep from getting pushed around, but most people that see me step out of the way. It’s part of the reason I don’t like to go out much. The stares are hard enough to deal with. When I do go grocery shopping it’s always late at night to the twenty-four-hour store. It’s fewer people and fewer looks as I load up on stuff I can’t get online.
I don’t mention that I was just at the store two days ago. Instead I’ll just grab a few things and make it seem like I had to go to the store, too. I’m still surprised we ran into one another instead of me having to knock on her door. And then she asked me to come with her, so that has to be a good sign. Right?
The walk to the store is too quick, or at least the time passes by too fast. It always feels like that when I’m with Teeny. Time somehow speeds up and it’s never enough.
“Why don’t you push the cart so I can check off my list?” she suggests, and I agree. “Let’s see, I’ve got a ton on here, but just throw in whatever you need and we can divide it up when we get to the end.”
I nod as we walk down the aisles and she puts stuff in the basket. She talks the whole time about her favorite foods and what her mom cooks that she likes best. She asks me about the breads I make and when we get to the baking aisle I get some supplies for her and tell her I’ll teach her some simple recipes.
Knowing that I’m going to get to see her again without making an excuse makes me feel light and happy. She wants to spend more time with me and that has to mean she wants to get to know me better.
When we get to the aisle with baby stuff, I stop the cart and stare down it. “Um, I guess you don’t need anything on this one?” I make it sound like a question and she shakes her head.
“I’d love to have kids one day.”
“Me too,” I say, and she smiles brightly. Her smile could light up the night sky and I love that it’s because of me.
When she has to stop for toothpaste, it happens to be right beside a row of condoms. Suddenly I notice that there are shelves and shelves of them and they’re practically screaming at me. I tried to put one on when I was younger just to see what it felt like, but it ripped as I was trying to get it on my hard cock. It was the biggest size they made, but it was a two pack. The second one I got on without tearing, but it only rolled halfway down my length.
I glance over at Teeny, who’s looking at the condoms, too. I look down her body and think about my big cock trying to fit inside her. It would be impossible. They don’t make condoms for Bigfoot, so it’s not like I could even do it if I wanted to.
“Do you, um, need anything else?” she asks as she looks up at me and then back to the condoms.
I guess I have been standing here staring at them for a while, but I just shake my head. “Do you?”
She looks at the boxes again and then back at me. Her eyes travel down my chest and stomach to between my legs and I watch as she licks her lips and then looks away. “Not yet.”
My cock swells again and I push the cart ahead to hide it from her. I don’t have anything to cover it up right now, so I just breathe and think about my great aunt Myrtle in a bikini.
I go up to the checkout lane and start to deposit all the stuff on the belt. The girl cashier gasps when she sees me but doesn’t say anything. She starts scanning stuff and Teeny tells me she forgot something and runs back to get it. Before she can get back, the cashier finishes and I pay for Teeny’s stuff.
“Oh gosh, Bull, I’m so sorry. Here, let me give you some cash.” She digs in her purse and I put my hand on top of hers to stop her.
“My treat,” I say and she smiles up at me brightly.
“You really are a big teddy bear,” she says, and I hear the cashier snort.
I look up and she ducks her head as she scans the paper plates Teeny forgot to get the first time. I glance at Teeny and she’s giving a death stare at the girl as she hands over her money. I don’t know why but it warms my chest even though I hate she witnessed that.
Once Teeny has paid for her stuff, I grab the bags from the cart and step outside with them in my hands.
“Let me help you carry something,” she says and I raise an eyebrow at her.
“I think I can manage,” I say, and she laughs.
“I know, but I don’t want you to feel like you have to.”
I start to say something in response, but before I can a guy walks into me and pushes me off balance. I have all the bags in my hands and before I can right myself I swing around and knock the guy to the ground. It was an accident, but as soon as he falls he starts cursing and making a scene.
“Watch where you’re going, you sasquatch-looking motherfucker,” he says as he looks down at his cracked cell phone. “You owe me a phone, asshole.”
“You should watch where you’re going instead of looking at your phone!” Teeny shouts, coming to my defense.
Normally guys like him don’t say a word to someone my size, but there’s a crowd outside the store and people are watching. This is what I hate most and now all eyes are on me. I have to make this stop so I can get Teeny out of here.
“Sorry about that,” I say as I reach into my pocket and grab a business card. “Just call that and I’ll take care of it.”
“Yeah right.” The guy says as he gets up off the ground with his smashed phone. “You expect me to believe that, Sloth?”
I’ve been called worse by lesser men but I can’t get in a fight right now. I could put this guy ten feet underground, but there are too many witnesses and most importantly Teeny is right here with me. I decide to try and keep cool and handle this the best I can. I put down some of the bags and then take out my wallet.
“Here. If that’s not enough, you call that number and I’ll make sure you get what you need,” I say as I hand him a grand. I don’t think his phone costs near that much, but I’ve spent most of my life trying to avoid conflict and I’m looking for the best way to do it now.
“Oh, I will.” He’s smug as he tucks the money away and then glances at Teeny. “Just keep your chihuahua off me.”
Teeny makes a sound, but before she can say a word I reach out and snatch his neck with my bare hand and the crowd audibly gasps.
“You can insult me all you want, and you can claim that your flip phone is worth more than a thousand dollars. But the second you say one bad word about my angel I’ll snap your fucking neck.” He makes a gurgling sound as he claws at my hand and his feet dangle off the ground. “Now apologize to the lady.”
“Sorry,” he says quickly with the last of his air.
I squeeze him harder for just a second to make sure he gets the message and then let him drop to the ground. The crowd steps back as I grab the bags I put down earlier and then turn to face Teeny.
She’s taken a step away from me and her eyes are wide with shock and maybe even fear. In that moment I hate what I’ve done and wish that I could change the last five minutes of my life.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper, and I turn to walk back to our building.